《JAHS/ELEY》Chapter 53: So Who Took All My Juice?
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"Whatever happened to Michael?" I asked.
"Michael?" Jahseh replied.
"Yes, demon Michael. He was here when we all visited Nick, where is he now?"
"That nigga moved to Topanga."
"Topanga? Like Topanga, California?"
"The one and only."
"That's literally on the other side of America from us. Why'd he move?"
"He said he just wants to go home, Topanga is where he's from. He has family there and stuff, and he wants to start up something new. He's been in Florida too long."
"That's where that fucking serial killer lived! That one guy with the swastika on his forehead."
"You mean Charles Manson? Symere told me that today marks the one year anniversary he died."
"Why does Symere know that?"
"Symere is weird, he also knows a lot about Heaven's Gate. More satanic shit."
"Where is Symere? Matter of fact, where is Omar and Gazzy?"
"Was I the only one that paid attention when they left to go to London? They're vacationing."
"They're the quietest out of the whole group, are they together or something?"
"They have been together longer than Stokeley and I."
"They're dating? I did not know that."
"Well they're not loud about it, I don't know what goes on behind the scenes." Jahseh says
"Just like we don't know what goes on behind the scenes between you and Stokeley, update me."
"Nothing has happened really."
"Nothing? You guys don't go on dates? Go shopping?"
"Sometimes our schedules don't coincide."
"You still work at the same job as Miles?"
"No, I quit it."
"Why? You don't have a job now."
"I am uncomfortable working with the coworkers."
"Your only coworker is Miles though.."
"Enough about me! What's he tea." He says.
"The tea?" I reply.
"Don't act like you don't know what I'm talking about..you and Jared, what's the tea?"
"There is no tea, it's empty."
"I made more, so spill it."
I sigh, "He came into my shift one time and was asking me to tell him about his future and shit. And he asked if he was gonna get married so I said yeah and shit. And after a bunch of questions, he asked if he asked if he was ever going to talk to his friend again."
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"He was talking about you?"
"I suspected, so I said yeah. Hopefully, and shit. Like that and he said he misses how we'd always clown each other."
"Go on.."
"andsoheapologizedagainforkissingmeandhe
knewididntlikeitsoitshouldnthappenagainandi
genuinelydidlikeitandijustsaidididntlikeitsoi
wouldntseemfruityandisaidineversaidididnt
likethekiss."
"Kim, can you please speak slower." Jahseh says chuckling.
"The important thing is he said that he thought I didn't like it, and I said that I never said I didn't."
Jahseh then starts jumping up and making weird monkey noises, "So what does this mean? Do you like him?!"
"Jah, I don't know, I don't know Jared that well."
"Okay, but since you guys talked about it already, you should be fine..just hang out more."
"But what if we kiss again?"
"It's not going to happen again unless you let it. But it doesn't have to play out that way. You've known of him for a long time, just get to know about him."
"Why are you doing this Jah?"
"Because! You helped me, now I help you."
"You've helped me plenty already, you don't have to."
"I know I don't have to, I want to. Therefore, I am going to make you and Jared a power couple."
"It's not like that-"
"It's Egg Zach Lee like that."
"Why is everyone saying 'Egg Zach Lee' now?"
"Because it's funny. Spam 'Egg Zach Lee' in the chat right now." Jahseh says looking towards nothingness.
"Who are you talking to?" I asked
"Don't worry about it."
I haven't talked to my parents in a while, my dad especially. My parents aren't together anymore, I've acquired a step father from my mom, and a stepmother from my dad. Which is weird, because I now have 2 sets of parents, but they remain close as friends which I am grateful for. They have a child, me, together so they must.
"Stokeley. How has life been for you?" My dad asks me. We're on FaceTime right now, along side with my mom who's next to him in the call.
"Life's pretty hectic right now. New place, new job and everything. How about you mom, dad?"
"See, Stokeley, the church is moving locations, and packing up has been hard for your old man."
My dad and mom own a church, I'd always be the one to announce shit, like when we're going to start offerings, or events, news about the church, shit like that. It was embarrassing and I absolutely hated it. The aunties and there would always be like "take your time, baby" or "you got it, Stokeley." Whenever I'd fuck up or stutter.
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Of course the church isn't literally moving, dumbass. They're tearing down the old one, building a new church. So whatever the fuck they was doing there, is moving locations. As you can see, before I told you where I grow up, it's religious quite a bit.
And I don't know why my dad always calls himself my "old man." 50 isn't that old, especially since my dad and mom had me at a youthful age. You can do the math, 50 minus 24.
"Why are you guys moving?" I asked.
"The old one is...failing you know?" My mom says.
"All these shit investments." I said.
"Stokeley!" My mom says.
"Sorry, you just reminded me of my friend who owns 2 failing businesses." I said.
"Well you should learn from your friend and start investing! Don't want to own a place that has a rating of a half star, how does that even happen?" My dad says laughing.
I know. How does that even happen. Not even a question, it's a bold statement.
"Anyway, speaking of business, what do you do to make this bread?" My mom asks.
"It's GET this bread." I corrected her
"Oh whatever, you kids are so different. You know what I meant." She says.
"I bartend."
"Since when do you drink, Stokeley?" My asks, shocked.
"I don't drink like that." I replied.
"You probably suck at that bartending job." My dad jokes.
"He probably can't make a margarita." My mom adds making them both start laughing.
"For your information, mother and father, I CAN make a margarita. I just learned how to." I said. I really am proud about it too.
"Oh Stoke, you probably put tap water and half peeled lemons into people's drinks and charge 15 dollars for it. That's the same thing you use to do when you were a kid, and get your Barney sippy cup, go to bathroom and put toilet water into your cup and give it to me." My mom said laughing.
"Oh! I remember that! He charged me 2 cents for that. I gave him 2 pennies and he took them and I followed him into the bathroom, just to found out this little 3 year old boy is serving me toilet water. I've never wanted a refund SO bad in my life." My dad added, also laughing.
"I don't remember doing any of that." I said.
"You were frickin' 3! Of course you don't remember." My mom pointed out.
"Yeah, you was a stupid kid, Stoke." My dad said.
"Speaking of kids, where are my grandchildren?" My mom said suddenly.
I choked. I choked like bad. Like you know when you start choking so suddenly, and it feels like you're going to suffocate and die? That's how I feel.
I felt that way because one, the person I'm with can't have kids. Two, it's because it's a guy! I mean, I can adopt but..that's too much work.
"Uh, still inside my balls." I said.
"Stokeley, seriously. Are you with anyone currently? Who's the special girl?" My dad asks.
Girl? I have never smelled that before.
"Girl?" I said concerned.
"Yes! Girl! Is there someone yet?" My mom says.
"Yeah..there's someone."
My mom and dad "ouuu" in surprise. "What's their name?"
"Jah...sayla. Jahsayla. Yes, that is the name of the woman I am currently in a spiritual relationship with."
"Jahsayla, that's a pretty name." My mom says.
"How long have you guys been together?" My dad asks.
"A month..tomorrow."
"Damn, that's too early to meet her. Can we have a picture?" My dad asks.
"I don't..I don't have any pictures of her. Right now."
"Come on! Is she around?" My mom asks.
"No she's at work."
"Oh okay. Well, I hope this young woman is the one! I want some grand babies." My dad says.
"Alright Stoke, Thank you for calling us today! Now that we know more about your current situation, we shall call more." My dad says.
Fuck.
"You're welcome, mom and dad." I said.
"Okay, we love you. Bye." They said before hanging up.
If you remember me saying; where I grew up, being gay was looked down upon as gross, inhuman, not "pure" and such, you'd know why I'm lying.
Of course I shouldn't care about what others think, but at the same time they're my parents. I care about what THEY think. I don't know how they're going to react when they're son is oh so suddenly gay.
But for now, I have to play along with the game I just started.
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