《》Cleaning The House
Advertisement
OMG--you are living in a pit. A pigsty. When was the last time the house was cleaned, for the love of all things holy?
And you know YOU didn't make this mess. SOMEONE ELSE did, so HE is responsible for cleaning it.
Here's how he handles it.
-Aunt Mito raised him right, he knows how to wield a broom and mop
-Calls up Killua: "Dude. C'mon over and help me? Please?"
-Killua laughs and says sucks to be you, loser
-Gon, grumbling, cleans the house by himself
-He's a fucking Zoldyck, none of them know how to do household shit
-He calls Illumi for help. "How do you clean a house?"
-"Fuck if I know. Why are you cleaning a house?"
-He calls Milluki, who laughs at him and hangs up
-He calls Alluka. "I'm locked up in a room, do you think I have any idea?"
-He calls Kalluto. "I told you never to call me at this number, jerk, this is my work phone"
-He calls Gon. "Sucks to be you," screams Gon, laughs, and hangs up
-Cleans the house
-It takes him a couple hours
-Tries to beg off, saying he's too busy
-You call bullshit
-Groaning, he concedes, and rolls his sleeves up, but does such a terrible job you eventually push him aside and do it yourself
-Covers the entire house with Bungee Gum just to make everything 10 times worse and further piss you off
-"All right, all right, all right, hee hee hee, I'll clean for real"
-You tell him he can't use Texture Surprise or you'll kill him
-Calls a housekeeping service
-Sits back and gives himself a manicure
-This is Chrollo we are talking about okay. His house never gets dirty.
-Breaks into a building and kidnaps one of the custodians who is innocently mopping the floor
-Puts a sack over his face and ties him to a chair
-"You're gonna clean the fucking house, got it?" (Starts up a loud power tool) "Or do I hafta USE THIS--"
-Why do you think Chrollo's house is always spotless?
Advertisement
- In Serial131 Chapters
Magic Shop System
Ranulf never thought he would open his eyes again, as he laid in his own pool of blood. Unaware and ignorant of the portrayals of destiny.
8 1946 - In Serial10 Chapters
Synchronizing Minds - A first contact story
So what are the intelligent aliens like? The humans didn't know for quite some time, since even though they had ventured out far, they had only found few animal species and those had been as far from sapience as common earthworms. But now they had finally stumbled upon someone and a first contact meeting is happening. Can ambassador Neil, the represantitive of humans, find friendship standing before a vastly different sapient creature that is six times her size and just learned about the concept of language? Or are the humans actually the weird ones?
5 69 - In Serial24 Chapters
Event Horizon
Warning: the first blue box appears at chapter 24. David always lived his life, looking at the world through a film of grey. He knew he was dull, he knew he was worthless. And the world was too. His life ended in an instant, hit by a truck. Then he woke up again, and the System gave him a mission. Pretty standard isekai, so far. The only problem was that whenever he died, he respawned. After agony and pain, he would come back reforged. And so he died, again and again. And when he completed his mission, another one awaited. On and on. But his life had meaning now.
8 236 - In Serial73 Chapters
The Verant Chronicles - Book One
The once powerful Verant Empire had been brought to its knees after seven years of civil war. The war maybe over, a new emperor maybe at the helm, but the empire remains broken. Deadly plagues, encroaching monsters, divided political loyalties only scratch the surface of the problems the empire now faces. Highwaymen make the roads unsafe, powerful wizards go unchecked and goblin hordes threaten local towns and villages. Elwin doesn’t want to spend his days as a farmer and dreams of adventure. He, his brother Rith, best friend Emerson and adopted cousin Anna, decide to go out into this world as adventurers hoping to seek fame and fortune just like in the books they read. The empire is at a crossroads as Elwin and his friends experience the aftermath of the war, they must come to terms with what it means to live in the Verant Empire as one of it's citizens. It all begins with an intriguing map sewn into cloth, written in a strange language and depicting a place that doesn’t seem to exist. Elwin and his friends decide to go to the capital city to join the adventurer’s guild and find someone who can translate the map and hopeful recognize the locations depicted. Along the way they encounter lizard creatures, goblins, former soldiers, a bard, druid and a powerful wizard who has his own eye on the map. They meet new friends and create deadly enemies. From great plains to a bustling metropolis, to a town devastated by an earthquake, their world of Gaia has a gritty realism to it and the empire is only a small part of a much large realm. It is a Romanesque world teetering on a renaissance in which Gods, gunpowder, armored knights, griffin riders and magic coexist uneasily. Elwin and his companions drink, they swear, they have sexual encounters, they make mistakes and face serious moral dilemmas at every turn. Planned out to be 30+ chapters in total including a prologue and epilogue. Chapters will be released about twice a week when possible.
8 353 - In Serial14 Chapters
My best friends boyfriend
I'm not suppose to like him. Why? Because he's my best friends boyfriend.
8 100 - In Serial11 Chapters
Encanto x reader
you are y/n madrigal. Antonio's twin sister. it's the night of your guys birthday. but something else happens. what will happen to the encanto?
8 206

