It's your nephew's 4th birthday and you have been recruited to throw a kiddie party for him and all his preschool buddies.

You can't do this without a little help, right? You pick up your phone and call a few of your buddies...

-"Okay, I need you guys to come up with some party games. I don't know what little kids like to play"

-They look offended. "We aren't little kids"

-"Well close enough. Just come up with something that doesn't involve video games, all the parents are yapping about too much screentime"

-The two of them sit down and brainstorm for a while, then hand you a list of games they've come up with

-Farting contest

-That game where you make them sit on balloons to see who can bust one first with their butts. It makes some kids cry and freaks them out but that's funny

-Pin the tail on the donkey (we can put my brother in charge of this. Maybe he can even be the donkey if he's in a good mood)

-Have them chug Coke as fast as they can to see who can belch the loudest (last time I did this with my little brother though he threw up on accident)

-You read their list and, in exasperation, throw up your hands and call a bounce-house rental place instead

-As the kids arrive, he hands each parent a paper to sign

-"Just a little liability waiver," he says, with a pleasant smile. "No child enters the bounce house until I've gotten these all filled out, okay? Anybody want some fruit punch?"

-You put him in charge of the grill and instruct him to make burgers and hot dogs for the kids

-He is a good sport about this at first, but starts to get annoyed at the pickier kids' requests

-"The hot dog is too burnt?" you hear him snapping. "Fine kid! Eat a RAW one!"

-You hurry over and give him a beer to mellow him out

-You debate inviting him to this party at all, but then realize he may be of some good use

-You ask him if he'll entertain the kids with a magic show

-"Sure, sure." He does card tricks and stuff, and the kids are all enthralled. You are relieved, he's behaving himself

-He begins to make balloon animals for the kids after the show is over. Your nephew and some of his friends come running up to you, showing you his creations

-"Oh look, he made you a doggie! And that's a bunny! How cute...and what's this?" You look at it closer. "HISOKA!" you scream

-"What?" he says innocently. "It's an arrow. I told them Uncle Pokkle was coming by"

-You ask him if he'll dress up like Gittarackur and do the whole transformation thing as part of Hisoka's magic show

-"Are you crazy," he says grumpily. "That'll scare the fuck out of them. Do you not know anything about children?"

-"Fine." You leave him to do whatever he wants

-Coming back in a little while later, you find in him a chair rocking two infants, feeding one of them with a bottle and listening to a podcast on his phone

-"What's this?"

-He rolls his eyes. "One of the parents brought their twin babies along and couldn't get the damn kids to shut up crying, so I took over"

-"I didn't realize you were so good with kids"

-He rolls his eyes again and says in a high, girlish voice, "Honey, are we going out tonight? Shall I call the babysitter? Oh--wait! Let's save a few bucks and make Illumi babysit...."

-You don't have anything specific for Chrollo to do, but you notice all the kids keep running up to him, then running away with huge grins on their faces

-You walk over. "What are you doing with them?" you ask. "They're all smiling like you're handing out hundred-dollar bills over here"

-"Just playing 'guess which pocket I have the surprise in,'" says Chrollo

-You find your nephew. "Did you play 'guess which pocket I have the surprise in' with Uncle Chrollo?" you ask.

-Your nephew nods, and proudly holds up a hundred-dollar bill

-"Uncle Chrollo is so rad"

-"Time to do the birthday cake"

-"Shit, I forgot a lighter. Anyone got a match? No? Augh! How am I going to light these candles?"

-Feitan leans over and whispers to the kid next to him, "Hey kid. Stamp on my foot really hard, okay?"

-The kid obliges

-Feitan winces in pain, then shoots a fireball out toward the cake and lights the candles

-"Pain Packer/Rising Sun Lite," he explains to you

-Because he has the nicest phone, you ask him to take photos of the party

-He goes around snapping pics all afternoon, then decides to take a break

-Getting himself a piece of cake, he sits down and picks up one of the balloon creations Hisoka made, idly fiddling with it

-Pokkle arrives. "Hi," he says. "Oh, balloon animals! How cute. But...what is that one supposed to be?"

-"It's for you," Shal says. "Hisoka said it's supposed to be an arrow"

-Pokkle raises his eyebrows. "I may have a dirty mind or something...but take it from an expert...that ain't no arrow"