《A Howl For Help》Chapter 32
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We were all shivering, it was cold and drizzling. I look at my visible, misty breath when I exhaled unsteadily. The dark formal wear was scarcely providing me enough warmth, and I could tell that barely anyone wanted to be here.
About twenty people stood around the freshly dug grave that held the casket belonging to Alpha Ryan of the Black Raven Pack. I forced Maddox to come with me, along with his cousins, Zoe, and numerous guards to watch Taylor. Additionally several Black Raven pack members had shown up, we were in the pack's old territory after all, it wouldn't be their land for long though. Maddox was reworking borders to give the land to neighboring packs.
The guards stood looking tall and gruff as if the weather had no affect on them. It was worthless though, Taylor was a wreck mourning his father, he would make no attempts at escape. Not to mention the fact that his condition was still awful after being imprisoned for several weeks.
I felt bad for him, even though I know I shouldn't. He never felt bad for me, but that's what makes us different. I have sympathy, I couldn't say the same for him.
Taylor was kneeled next to the grave quietly sobbing as a few pack members spoke to the crowd, recalling memories with Ryan and putting him on a pedestal.
"Alpha Ryan was strong and passionate. He led our pack with pride and a ferocity I have never before witnessed," a close friend of the Alpha droned on.
I listened to their words, and tried to hide my reactions. Ryan had instilled so much fear into me. He could have been the best Alpha in the world, but it wouldn't subtract from the fact that he was horrifically cruel and unloving. I did not agree with the words they spoke, but I would respect the funeral regardless.
Despite everything, I still found tears pooling in my eyes. The idea of death does not sit well with me. I spent years thinking I might not wake up the next morning, it's a horrifying thought to think that one moment you're here, the next you're not.
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Ryan was an awful, despicable, wicked man, I don't know why I mourned his loss. I should be relieved.
As people finish speaking, Maddox places his hand on the small of my back and we begin to make our way back to the cars so we can go home. I blink away any remaining tears not wanting to answer any questions.
We sat in the backseat with Zoe and Isaac in the front.
"It was nice of you to do this for Taylor," Maddox whispered in my ear as I cuddled into him resting my head on his chest. A faint smile crossed my face, but I was still in shock that Ryan was actually dead. And were we just meant to still execute Taylor after what just happened? Hasn't he been through enough? I'm so confused, I cursed my nihilistic thoughts that led me to feel bad for my tormentors.
A long ride awaited us, and I couldn't help myself from dozing off being so close to my mate.
I woke suddenly, my eyes shooting open.
I stared at the dreary sky above me, feeling the rain falling down on my skin. I squinted my eyes, trying to keep water from getting in them. I then realized I was surrounded by impossibly tall dirt walls. They were confining and fit to the shape of my body, a small rectangle. I find that I am unable to move or get up, when a figure comes into my eyeline above me. Ryan is smirking as he pulls a shovel into my vision. I suddenly realize I am in a grave. Panic seeps into me. Ryan plunges the shovel into the soft earth and deposits the dirt right into the grave. I was going to be buried alive. I was going to die.
I sit up screaming.
"Shit Phoenix, I almost crashed the car," Isaac says annoyedly. My eyes dart around the car as I quickly recall that we had just come from Ryan's funeral. I take a quick breath and apologize.
Maddox faces me, obviously concerned. "Nightmare?" I nod curtly. Surprisingly, I did not want to discuss any further with an audience. Me and Zoe were really becoming great friends, and Isaac was an acquaintance at the moment, but I didn't even like talking about it with my mate.
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Thankfully, nobody spoke about it for the remainder of the trip. By the time we got back, it was late and I just wanted to collapse in bed, I was spent from the long car rides today and from attending such a strange funeral. Despite being exhausted, I feared what nightmares I would face if I fell back asleep.
I decided I was not going to sleep. Of course I'd have to pretend to or else Maddox would lecture me, so we both got into pajamas and laid down in bed. He must have been just as tired as me, because he knocked out almost instantly.
After waiting a while to make sure he was asleep I crept out of bed and headed towards the door. There was no way I would stay awake, I needed help.
In the kitchen I brewed up some coffee. I put the mug to my lips and cringed at the taste. I was never a coffee person, but I needed to stay awake. I hated to admit it, but I was scared. That nightmare felt eerily real. A little bit of exhaustion would beat out being buried alive by my old dead alpha.
Maddox POV
I woke up the following morning to an empty bed which I thought was somewhat strange as Phoenix sleeps in whenever she can. She had probably just ran to the bathroom or something though.
Some time passes and I begin to question my original theory. I yawn and make my way to the bathroom. She is not there. Perhaps she was hungry and wanted an early breakfast.
I sighed a breath of relief I didn't realize I was holding when I found her scurrying around the kitchen preparing a huge breakfast. I smile hearing All Time Low playing on the speaker, Phoenix had really turned me on to the band in the last few weeks.
I approach her from behind, she doesn't yet realize I'm here. I put my arms around her waist and lazily sing along to the song in her ear, "paint the walls black and scream, fuck the world cuz it's my life, I'm gonna take it back, and never for a second blame yourself."
I hear her quiet giggle and I can't help but smile. I turn her around, she's so fucking adorable. She was looking down trying to hide her grin as she bit her lip slightly. I pulled her into a deep kiss, I felt her smile widen as she reciprocated the kiss.
She pulls back and stares at me looking over the moon happy.
My smile waivers as I notice dark circles under her eyes which looked clouded with tiredness. She notices my change in expression and quickly turns back around to continue cooking.
I grasp her shoulder, forcing her to look back at me. "Did you sleep at all last night?"
She wriggles away from me confirming my suspicions. "Sweetie, I know the nightmares are bad, but you can't just not sleep." She was ignoring me, pouring pancake batter onto the skillet.
"I don't know how to make things better, we can ask Wyatt for solutions."
At this comment she lashes out, "I don't want to ask Wyatt anything! I just want to be able to sleep without subconsciously thinking I'm in danger. You don't get it..." It's silent for a second. "I'm sorry. I-I didn't mean to yell," she whispers.
"Hey, hey don't apologize. We are going to figure this out. The mate bond is growing, it will help. Once we have the ceremony, I promise things will get better."
She nods, continuing to flip pancakes.
I snatch the spatula out of her hand, "go sit down, I'll finish this." She complies, and I know that I just need to be there for her for now.
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