The music began and the six of us started the walk down to the aisle. Sam and I were up front, I wore flats because I was the same height – maybe a little taller than the others. Sam had a harder time because he was 6'1 compared to our 5'10-5'11 pack members. Behind me was Paul and Embry, Jared and Jacob were behind Sam.

I kept my eyes planted straight ahead, too afraid to look into Sue's or Leah's or Seth's eyes. I could feel the tribe look upon us in honor and sadness. The march to the grave felt like a hundred miles and the casket seemed to weigh a million pounds. None of which would affect me normally, this had to be the effect of the emotional toll it took on us. The bullet hole throbbed painfully, a reminder that I failed. A permanent scar, a permanent reminder.

The graveyard was filled with friends and family, most of the reservation showed up and were standing around the freshly dug hole. They were all in various forms of clothes, some wore suits, other jeans but everyone was in black. The pack, each had slacks and a black shirt.

Harry's death was a firm reminder to the pack and to the council how dangerous the world was. How important it was for the wolves to exist. We slowed as we got to the grave and like six carbon copies, we lowered the casket off our shoulders and rotated to set it in the pulley. It had to be disorientating to see the six of us move so in sync.

Once the casket was on the pulley each of us touched the lid and bowed our heads before walking to the back, the same as we came. Sam and I in front, then Paul and Jared and finally Embry and Jacob.

As with all funerals someone gave a grand speech. Billy was the one designated for that, he recited a prayer in Quileute before allowing Charlie to talk about his old hunting buddy.

"-Harry was one of my best friends. He was a good man." Charlie trailed off unable to say anything more.

The numbers dwindled, slowly at first.

Jacob was the first member of the pack to leave, none of us said anything but we knew he would check on Bella. Sam after Jacob, he wanted to give Leah some peace afraid his appearance would cause her more distress. One by one the pack left, until it was just me left.

Harry was deep in the ground and the only ones left were the Clearwater's and me. I offered to stay to make sure they got home safely. I looked Sue in the eyes trying to relay everything, how sorry I was, how hard I tried. However, my sight caught Leah, she was trembling. Clearly my presence didn't make her happy.

In fact, it enraged her.

I saw the signs the trembling, the fast breathing, everything that signified her anger. My eyes locked with hers and I felt a pull. I could see the rope tie itself to Leah, a knot formed tying the two of us together. I looked at Seth, he was too close to Leah. She

would never forgive herself for hurting them. I couldn't let her.

Seth and Sue both were to close.

In a startling quick movement, I pulled Sue and Seth back just in time for large grey wolf to appear. She was tall and lanky, weaker looking than the other wolves. The shock was evident on everyone's face but none more so than Seth, who started shaking too.

I pushed him and Sue apart standing between them. If I were to get hurt, I'd heal but Sue wouldn't. Just like Leah, Seth exploded into a giant wolf, he was not grey but a sandy red color, he was a little smaller but just as lanky, with big oversized paws. I wondered briefly if my paws looked like that seeing as Seth and I were not that far apart in age.

"Seth, Leah... I need you guys to calm down." I turned to Sue "we need some clothes... I have some in my car that'll probably fit Leah. Maybe a jacket or something of one of the guy's"

Sue ran off to get said items. I looked back at the two who were standing near the forest, Seth's eyes held amazement and his head looked around in awe. Leah though she looked just like all the other new members – terrified. "I know this is disorientating and scary, trust me. But I need you to relax. Picture yourself on two legs, a human. Slow deep breaths and when you think you have the picture, I want you to try and stand on two legs. Okay"

Seth was the first to phase back, just in time for Sue to appear with some shorts. I was right, Paul had left a pair of pants in my car. Normally that would be seen as weird but considering we all turn into giant wolves and have seen each other in various stages of undress nothing was weird anymore.

Sue handed Seth the pants and sat him down. His face was still filled with amazement. I turned to look at Leah who was still freaking out. "Leah, close your eyes and take deep breaths. Just focus on calming down and I promise you'll be okay" I soothed, just like my mom or aunt did when I was hurt. I hoped there were no other members phased, it would make it hard for her to focus if so.

Eventually after some deep breathing Leah finally calmed down enough to phase back. Once she was dressed, I offered to take them home. Sam would have to stay away but Billy would have to talk to them. I hated that this had to be done on the day of their fathers funeral, but it was necessary.

"this is so cool" Seth said after everything was explained.

"No Seth this isn't so cool" Leah growled. He furrowed his brows.

"well, I think it is" he mumbled. I felt horrible for the two, but I was unsure what to say that would make Leah feel better.

A few days passed; Leah was still angry, but Seth was fitting in just fine. I knew Leah was having a hard time because of Sam, so we tried to keep her from being on patrol with him. Plus, her dad just died, this was all so disorientating for her.

Being surrounded by guys who on a few occasions pictured her naked or got mad at her for bringing up somethings that were better left unsaid. I got it; I really did. I mean the guys really didn't make it easy for her, Jacob especially.

When Charlie found out Bella left, he was irate. Thankfully my mom was there to calm him down, so he didn't hunt her down or rush to the Cullen house. Victoria was around less now probably because Bella wasn't here, and she knew the pack was protecting my mom and aunt. She couldn't get close to them without me interfering and she really only wanted me dead.

Of course, knowing that I was close enough to grab her jacket had to be terrifying.

I had been spending less time with my mom and Charlie unless they were on the reservation. It wasn't against the rules, I could be in Forks, but I couldn't hunt for the beast while there, so I stayed in La Push sometimes going further towards Canada and as far south as I could. All in search of the red head. She was all over the place, but not in Forks she avoided it. But she'd be back, I knew it.

A few times I had dinner with my mom and Charlie, maybe fill in for the missing daughter a little. But it was nice to have some time to feel just like a family.

'well, Alex. I'm glad you aren't rebellious, or are obsessed with Edward Cullen' Charlie grumbled as he re-read the note again.

'I'm sure I cause enough worry for my mom as it is, I don't need to add a... boyfriend to the mix' I replied, pausing over the word boyfriend.

'oh, you'll always give me something to worry about. Especially since you're growing up. who knows what you'll do after graduation' my mom added picking up her plate. Charlie and I both got up to grab it, but she stopped us 'now I know my arm is a little indisposed, but I can carry a dish.'

The stern look she threw at us made Charlie and I sit back down. "she can be a little scary sometimes" I whispered earning a chuckle from Charlie who then nodded and pretended like nothing happened.

That was a few days ago, since then I had been staying on the reservation. Today was different though, I was walking along the beach. It was empty except for one person, Leah. She wasn't taking the phasing well.

I sat down next to her and the two of us sat in silence for a little while before Leah spoke.

"how'd you, do it? Be in the pack? Be surrounded by them all the time?"

I bit my cheek trying to find the best answer "I think it's easier for me now. I mean in the beginning they all treated me like another burden they had to protect. Then I proved myself when we killed the vampire. Plus, I was the fastest and had the best sense of smell. There are more extenuating circumstances on your end and for that I'm sorry."

Leah looked out into the water.

"It's going to take time, but things will all make sense. I mean there's a reason you're here, a reason you're a part of the pack. It can't be just to torture you. But if I'm being honest I'm glad you're here. I mean I like the guys, Embry mostly, he's not as loud or 'manly' as the others. They can be fun to hang out with outside of patrol but being surrounded by so much testosterone all the time. They don't get some things."

"that's the worst part or one of them. They're all such guys about everything. They just get over everything so easily."

I nodded "yeah... they get into fights and five minutes later they're BFF's again. Like the reason they fought doesn't exist anymore. I know they don't like being extra cautious with their thoughts or with phasing."

Leah cringed, already has someone visualized her. I wasn't sure who-not Sam or Jared. But the others yeah of course me thinking about them phasing for the first time didn't help that.

"we could make it worse for them by showing them what we see. But we'd have to visualize it. And if we're being honest I'd rather not do that."

Leah laughs, a full hearted one that hasn't been heard in nearly a year. I nudged her shoulder as we laughed, thankful for the peace and quiet, at least for a little while.