I had stayed up later than usual, deciding to sketch a little but threw the book down in exasperation when the picture turned into something I didn't want it to.

"this is ridiculous" I whispered to myself "it's getting out of hand now"

I ripped the page out and threw it in the trash can refusing to look at the golden eyes. It was like I was some sort of obsessive creep. Why couldn't I get her out of my head? She didn't want anything to do with me, hell she probably only knew I existed because I bumped into her.

I decided to take a bath before going to sleep, maybe it would help me relax.

I don't remember how long I was in the tub, but long enough for the water to cool. I was feeling more relaxed but feared my dreams would not be the same as I returned to my room.

My room was much like the rest of the house, wood floors, a cabin like appearance, with a rock wall and fireplace – well an electric fireplace. Toby had his own bed off to the side of my bed, but occasionally he would join me on my bed. Despite it looking small around my bed, it actually wasn't. My bed was in the corner of my room in front of my fireplace, but off to the side I had my office and a walk-in closet. It was just sectioned off.

It was also, technically upstairs but the window was out at ground level.

That night it was quiet... too quiet in the rainy town. I had gotten so used to falling asleep to the sound of rain that it was weird.

By Friday I was starting to feel better, Rosalie hadn't shown up at all, so I was starting to believe she dropped out or something. While that hurt to think about, it was better for my mental state, I was starting to draw other things, my mind didn't wander to her, 90% of the day- maybe 75%.

At lunch I was distracted by the trip to La Push that Mike was putting together. I easily agreed to go and offered to drive; my mom had agreed to let me drive her car, since it would fit five plus coolers and stuff. This meant Lee didn't need to borrow his mom's minivan.

In art I began painting my mask, having added the perfect amount of layers to it. It looked nicer than the first one but still wasn't good enough. Thankfully I had another chance, this one would need some more preliminary work.

Friday evening, my mother and I joined Charlie and Bella for dinner, Eve had dinner with Mark. And I was wishing I was there too-even being a third wheel wouldn't have been as awkward as this.

My mom was trying her best to smooth everything over, like she was used to this. But since she grew up with Charlie, I'm assuming she is. Bella was even more awkward than I have ever seen her.

The weekend went off without issue though, I showed Bella the library but as she put it was so small it wasn't worth getting a library card, unfortunately I agreed with her.

"yeah, Forks is limited in the extras department. Unless of course you want to go camping, then the Newtons have quite an array of gear. Usually, I go to Port Angeles to get craft supplies and other goods. Sometimes i go to the reserve, but they don't have a bookstore really."

"what do kids do around here for fun?" Bella chuckled slightly.

"well, depends. In the summer surfing or camping. But during the school year..." I sighed "nothing much. Sometimes we go to La Push but it's kind of a solitary kind of town"

"so, you just stay at home? Read?"

"draw, paint, hike... there's some nice rivers around so when we get our big thaw it's a great place to go kayaking."

"sounds like fun" she drawled. "nice car"

I smiled slightly as I unlocked the doors for us to get in. "yeah, my mother and Aunt got it for my birthday. A little much but my aunt firmly believes you only get to be young once. You wouldn't believe it if you saw her, she still acts like a teenager. She thinks a fast car is only the beginning, next thing you know she'll have me sky diving or something."

"she sounds like fun" Bella added with wide eyes.

"oh, she is, but I would say a little more excitable than I think your prepared for" I laughed. "she already got me to mountain climb, it was fun but also terrifying, I kept worrying my skinny arms would give out"

"you're probably right, too much for me" When we arrived at Bella's house, I let her out with a goodbye, and I'll see you on Monday.

The rain stayed soft for the rest of the weekend, and it ensured a relaxing weekend. After we meal prepped and got all of our shopping done for the week, I painted a little bit and was glad it had the absence of golden eyes.

On Monday I parked right next to Bella's truck. It was colder this morning, forcing me to bring out my winter coat but it wasn't raining or snowing... yet. I remember my mom's words this morning.

'you better take your coat; you don't want to get sick this early in the semester'

She was right, I got sick far more than any of my peers, pneumonia, sometimes hypothermia from the cold rain or water... it was a curse. The only positive was my mom was a doctor.

We had our first test in math, one I was prepared for, so it was a for sure A. In English I had a pop quiz on Wuthering Heights, it was straight forward and easy, but then again everything was pretty easy, I remembered things well, not perfectly but well enough.

When I walked out of class the air was full of swirling bits of white. I could hear people shouting excitedly to each other. The wind bit at my cheeks and my nose. It was beautiful, but only if it completely covered the ground, a thin layer not so much. Throughout the morning, everyone chattered excitedly about the snow; it was the first snowfall of the new year.

I was actually excited about my after-gym shower; it raised my body temp greatly making the cold not as big of a deal, though it took twice as long to dry my hair.

I walked alertly to the cafeteria. Mush balls were flying everywhere, including from Mike who I promptly had to launch a ball of mush back.

"good shot" Mike laughed as snow fell through his hair. I was in the process of laughing myself when I felt a blob fall onto my head.

"gotcha" Tyler laughed as he ran away.

I sighed "had that coming huh?"

I shook out my hair before Mike and I walked through the doors and running up to meet Jessica and Bella. He and Jessica were talking animatedly about the snow fight as we got in line to buy food. I didn't need to get much in the food section since I meal prepped.

Truthfully I was only in line to grab a ginger ale, we didn't have any at home and it would go well with my lunch. I stopped when I saw Bella freeze, I caught her line of sight and felt overwhelmed.

"Hello? Bella? What do you want?"

"What's with Bella?" Mike asked Jessica.

"Nothing," She answered. "I'll just get a soda today."

I shook my head and focused on getting my drink before meeting the others at the table. I was concerned for Bella; she hadn't taken her eyes off the floor the entire time. I couldn't worry about her too much, seeing as I had my own internal struggle going on.

I pulled out my lunch and slowly ate trying to appear as normal as possible.

I glanced up slightly to take a look at the table, if she was ignoring me then it wasn't my fault, and I could go back to pretending everything was fine.

They were laughing. Edward, Jasper, and Emmett all had their hair entirely saturated with melting snow. Alice, Lucia, and Rosalie were leaning away as Emmett shook his dripping hair toward them. They were enjoying the snowy day, just like everyone else — only they looked more like a scene from a movie than the rest of us.

None of them were looking towards me. I let out a quite sigh and began eating like normal, I was no longer concerned I did something wrong, if I just ignored her, she should ignore me.

I joined in the conversation at the table about some sort of massive snowball fight after school. I was in, just because I could get a cold from it did not mean I would avoid it. That wasn't a way to live.

"Bella, what are you staring at?" Jessica intruded, I looked up as well to see what she was staring at but if we were being honest, I already knew. At that moment Bella dropped her head, I looked back and noticed Edward staring at Bella, but one glance around the table my green eyes met gold. I quickly diverted my eyes and looked back at my table.

"Edward Cullen is staring at you," Jessica giggled.

"He doesn't look angry, does he?" She couldn't help asking.

I looked up at Edward before looking back at Bella "no... Should he be?"

"I don't think he likes me," She confided. Before putting her head down on her arms.

"The Cullens don't like anybody... well, they don't notice anybody enough to like them. But he's still staring at you." Jessica replied.

"Stop looking at him," Bella hissed.

Mike interrupted us then — bringing up the snowball fight with the other two. Jessica agreed enthusiastically. The way she looked at Mike left little doubt that she would be up for anything he suggested. Too bad Mike never realized that Jessica was practically in love with him.

But when we went to the door, everyone groaned in unison. It was raining, washing all traces of the snow away in clear, icy ribbons down the side of the walkway. I pulled my hood up, trying not to get hypothermia. Mike kept up a string of complaints on the way to building four. I was inclined to agree with him since rain after snow was not a good mix.

It was certain that I would be getting sick after today.