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Her gynecologist is retiring in a month.
Mina learns of this when she's gracelessly balancing her mail in the crook of her elbow, one hand occupied with her purse and the other frantically fiddling with the key to her apartment door, and she drops the stack of letters to the floor, catching quick sight of the pink, obligatory, thank you for being a loyal patient card.
Her doctor was an older woman, motherly and soothing, and Mina feels a slight pain as she stoops to pick up the card. She stands outside of her apartment, her purse clutched limply in her hand, and wonders if she should send flowers or a card of congratulations, knowing that she won't.
The card remains tacked to the bulletin board in her kitchen, just above her small little half-counter that extends from the wall, for nearly a month. Eventually, when she can put it off no longer, she calls the doctor's office and writes down, phone shoved into the crook of her neck and shoulder, the name of her referral and yet another number she needs to call.
Dr. Son. She tugs the old card off of her bulletin board and replaces it with the new scrap of paper before she shimmies back to the pan of pasta sauce she has simmering on the oven, her hips swinging in circles to the music flowing in her kitchen.
She gets a noise complaint the following morning and doesn't even bother attaching it to her bulletin board. Her appointment is at 2:00 pm on a Thursday, so at 12:00 pm on a Thursday, she washes herself thoroughly in her shower, fingers sliding between her legs, businesslike and rough. Probes pushing water into her folds, fingers sliding over her ass, between her cheeks. It's similar to the way that, in the ten minutes before your dentist appointment, you pull out the floss that you've barely touched in the last six months.
Mina got herself waxed in preparation or Dr. Son. She gasps when her fingers brush over her clit, up and around the smooth skin of her lips.
The gynecologist's office is, thankfully, un-office like. It's a small building just outside of the city with trees flanking it on either side. Hanging from the windows, in large trough-like planters are pink and white flowers. As she walks up the building's front steps, she double checks that the sign out front for the Offices of Drs. Choi, Park, and Son is, indeed, for this building and that she's not about to set foot in a little old woman's house with a freshly shaved pussy, demanding an examination.
When she's led from the reception area and back into the actual examination rooms, things begin to take on a distinctly more medical feel. The lighting changes from the soft gold lamps on the side tables in the waiting room to overhead fluorescents and the short carpet becomes white linoleum.
"Give this a quick once-over," the nurse tells her, handing her a clipboard on which she sees copies of her medical history.
"If there are any changes to what's written on that sheet, be sure to let the doctor know when she comes in."
When the nurse leaves, Mina plops down in one of the chairs in the room, not the examination table, tossing her purse onto the seat beside her. It takes less than twenty seconds for her to review the papers---there's nothing extraordinary about her medical history; her biggest surgery is wisdom teeth removal and she has no known allergies---so she tosses the board to the side, next to her purse and looks around the room.
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Across from her, on the wall, are two generic pictures of flowers, which she suspects are an attempt at making the room look more welcoming, but which only really do the opposite, giving the room the feeling of a dungeon that's trying, only half-heartedly, to masquerade as a tea room.
There's a counter to her side with the usual doctor accessories: cabinets, sink, latex-free glove dispenser.
Mina sighs and slouches in her seat. Her skirt, short and flouncy, rides up immediately, nearly exposing her underwear, but she doesn't bother correcting it. She's always been lax with propriety, was known in college for her tendency to walk through the hallways of her dorm in ass-bearing hot pants, and doesn't give much credence to the "sit like a lady" school of reasoning. If she wants to slump and if she wants to spread her legs and take up the space around her, she damn well will.
The door to the room opens a few minutes later and Mina immediately straightens, yanking her skirt roughly down over her thighs.
She turns with a polite smile, prepared to make the small talk that doctors and patients usually make, where they pretend like one of them won't have a hand up the other's vagina in mere minutes, but she stops abruptly when she sees the doctor, going entirely still.
Dr. Son...is Chaeyoung. Chaeyoung, like, the girl---woman, now---Mina spent two years lusting after in high school (when she was a freshman and Chaeyoung was a junior, then when she was a sophomore and Chaeyoung was a senior).
Chaeyoung, like, oh hey, there's my sexual awakening to my gayness right there in the curve of your breasts. Chaeyoung, like, all I want is to have a cliché high school romance with you where we grope in the back of your car (a red convertible, Mina remembers) and hold hands in the hallways and kiss in the lunch room and everyone kind of secretly hates us. Like...that Chaeyoung.
She's older, obviously, but she's still so aggressively Chaeyoung. She's always been sex to Mina. Not even sexy, but actual sex. The embodiment of everything lustful and dirty and wanting. She makes Mina insecure and a little crazy. Vulnerable. Like a virgin or a high school freshman, not a twenty-five year old woman with a job and a rent to pay.
God, Mina still gets off to the thought of her sometimes. Rubbing herself in bed with her knees tenting the sheets as she thinks about Chaeyoung---still high school Chaeyoung, not the Chaeyoung in front of her now with shorter hair, less eyeliner, and a white coat---sliding two inexperienced fingers into her pussy. She has no idea what Chaeyoung's sexual orientation was or is, but though Chaeyoung had boyfriends in high school, Mina always imagined herself as Chaeyoung's first girl. Every time.
"Hi, Mina," Chaeyoung says, shutting the door behind her and extending her hand. She doesn't say Mina's name in a familiar way and Mina is certain she knows it only from consulting her file hand moments before entering the room.
"I'm Dr. Son."
"Hi." Mina takes her hand and as they shake, Chaeyoung tilts her head to the side, the movements of her hand slowing as she frowns.
"Do I...I'm sorry, I feel like I know you from somewhere."
"High school," Mina tells her.
Her face feels warm and she wonders if she's blushing. It's dumb. She and Chaeyoung never even spoke in high school. It occurs to her, suddenly, that she should have pretended, at least initially, to be confused, too.
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"Uh, Glenwood, right?"
"Right," Chaeyoung agrees, giving that palm up there you go, good point gesture with her hand and letting it slap back down to her thigh. She walks past Mina and sits in the office's swivel chair, placing her clipboard on her desk. As she reads over it, she says, "I haven't thought about high school in a long time. What year were you?"
"Class of 2007," Mina tells her.
"Ah, I was class of 2005." Chaeyoung looks up and smiles.
"So I guess we did overlap for a year or two, huh?"
Mina nods. "Looks like it."
"Okay," Chaeyoung sighs moments later, making clicking sounds with her tongue as her eyes dart over the sheet in front of her. She glances up, looking around, and points to the clipboard lying abandoned on the chair.
"Did everything on there look right to you?"
"Oh, yeah." Mina picks up the clipboard and hands it to her.
"Sorry."
"No known allergies to any medication?"
"No."
"And nothing else you feel I should know about?"
"I don't think so."
"Okay, great," Chaeyoung mutters as she makes marks on the sheet in front of her.
"I'm just going to ask a few questions now about your reproductive health, if that's all right."
Oh, God, Mina thinks. "Sure, that's fine."
"At what age did you become sexually active?"
Mina swallows. Chaeyoung's staring at her in a patiently clinical way, entirely uninterested in Mina's orgasms and entirely focused on filling in the blanks on her sheet. Mina feels as though she's caught in an extremely boring, disappointing porn movie.
"I'm not sure...uh, probably around, like, fifteen maybe?"
"Great. And are you currently sexually active?"
"When I can manage it," Mina says with a nervous laugh and immediately considers suffocating herself with latex-free gloves. "I mean, not really."
"How many sexual partners would you estimate you've had in the past twelve months?"
Mina frowns as she thinks to herself. There was Momo sometime in February, but that fizzled by May. And then there was Sana for a while...
"Two, I think."
"And are you on birth control?"
"No, I'm not."
"Do you use condoms?"
"Oh, no," she laughs. Chaeyoung looks up at her, eyebrows raised and Mina unthinkingly lets out, "I don't like penises."
Chaeyoung frowns and Mina, for the second time in five minutes wants to die.
"I mean, I don't like men. Like, I'm gay. A lesbian."
"Ahhh," Chaeyoung nods in understanding.
She looks down at the chart in her hands again, like she's going to ask another question, but after a moment of silence, she looks up again, meeting Mina's eye.
"Right."
Nervously, Mina wets her lower lip.
"Any history of cancer in your family?" Chaeyoung asks, looking back down.
"Not that I know of, no."
"I'll still want to check your breasts for any lumps,"
Chaeyoung informs her, making a note on her clipboard. She meets Mina's eye.
"The most important tool in fighting any form of cancer is early detection. Are you comfortable with a breast examination today?"
"Yeah, sure."
Reaching behind her, Chaeyoung picks up the patient gown she'd brought in with her from the table. Standing, she hands it to Mina.
"I'm gonna ask you to go ahead and put this on and get up on the table and then I'll come back in and we'll get started. Okay?"
Mina takes the gown. "Sure."
"Great, thanks Mina."
Mina's nipples harden immediately when she removes her shirt, tugging it over her head and only realizing belatedly what the action must do to her hair. She can see the two stiff peaks even through the thin turquoise fabric of her bra.
Briefly, she considers running her fingers over her nipples a few times, just to try to warm them up some before---holy shit---before Chaeyoung gives her the examination, but she also knows it would be a lost cause.
The room is fucking freezing, the bare skin of her shoulders and stomach already goose-pimpling, even as she stands here, so she slides down her skirt and unhooks her bra, letting her breasts fall against her chest.
When she's entirely naked, save for the thin gown, she stacks her clothes on one of the chairs, tucking her bra and underwear into the fabric of her shirt. When she's been sitting on the edge of the exam table for a few minutes, staring at the wall in front of her and wondering if she's actually about to do this, there's a soft, questioning knock on the door.
"Yeah, come in."
"Great." Chaeyoung says.
The glance she gives Mina is fleeting and indifferent as she walks across the room to wash her hands.
"All ready?"
She comes to stand at the side of the exam table and gives the sanitary paper stretched out over it a soft pat.
"Go ahead and lay down on your back for me, Mina."
Mina does, all too aware of her flimsy gown and the way it gapes and tugs with every move she makes, sliding off her shoulder, and riding up her legs, leaving her ass completely bare, if the breeze she feels is anything to go by.
She settles herself and Chaeyoung instructs her to lift her arm above her head, before lifting the edge of her gown up. Her hand, small and gentle, grabs Mina's left breast, kneading it softly with considering fingers.
The room is entirely silent apart from the occasionally soft crinkle of the paper that Mina's sitting on. This close, she can smell Chaeyoung's perfume, sweet and full. It's a woman's scent, not like the strawberry scented spritz she sprayed in the high school bathroom most mornings, when Mina was fourteen and in love and would arrive early just to accidentally run into her.
Using two fingers, Chaeyoung shifts Mina's breast beneath her gown, feeling for lumps. Her hand stretches, suddenly, nearly encompassing the entirety of Mina's breast, fingers pressing in on all sides, and Mina lets out a small exhale, shifting slightly on the table.
"Does that hurt?" Chaeyoung asks, immediately pausing in her actions.
Mina can't look at her. There's a familiar throbbing between her legs. Her nipples are hard and Chaeyoung knows, can probably feel their aching stiffness against her palm.
"No, it's fine."
"Okay, I'm going to check the other breast now. You can put your arm down."
She walks around the table, guides Mina's other arm up, and begins feeling her other breast. Mina's breathing is shallow, rapid, her chest rising and falling, pushing into Chaeyoung's hand.
She begins as she did before, using two fingers to press repeatedly into the soft flesh of Mina's breast, but much more quickly this time, she changes her tactic. Her hand spreads as it did before, folding over
Mina's entire breast in something closer to a grope. She gives a soft squeeze, moving the flesh around.
"Does this feel okay?"
She doesn't remove her hand from Mina's breast.
"Yeah, that's okay."
"No pain?"
She gropes slightly harder as she asks. It's not hard enough to hurt, nowhere near like Mina encourages her partners to manhandle her tits in bed, but it doesn't feel medical, either.
"No, no pain."
"Good." Chaeyoung squeezes her again, a small little grope.
When she removes her hand, her thumb brushes over Mina's aching nipple and Mina sucks in a sharp breath, deafening in the otherwise silent room. God, she's wet. She knows she is, can feel it between her legs.
"Have you had a pap smear before?" Chaeyoung asks as she walks to the counter and pulls out two gloves. She turns to watch Mina as she slides them over her hands.
"Uh, yeah," Mina breathes out.
Fuck, she's wet. She's wet from Chaeyoung touching her breasts, and Chaeyoung's about to know it, too.
"Great. Go ahead and put your legs up in the stirrups for me."
With her legs raised, Mina's gown stretches between her knees, blocking her view slightly. She hears the wheels of Chaeyoung chair roll on the floor and then there are slick latex-free hands on the inside of her knees, pressing gently to urge her legs farther apart.
She obeys and when she's spread wide open, bare in front of Chaeyoung's face, she feels cool air her slick center, wetness sliding down her ass. Fuck, she's drenched. She has no idea what she should do right now, so far out of the realm of any previous gynecologist appointment she's ever had. Should she apologize? Laugh it off? Does this happen to everyone? Does Chaeyoung think she's disgusting, a lesbian pervert, getting turned on in the gyno's office? Does Chaeyoung touch everyone like she touched Mina?
"I'm going to spread some lubrication on you to make inserting the speculum easier," Chaeyoung says from somewhere between her legs and the reminder that she's there, staring at her, makes Mina want to snap her legs closed again.
"Is that all right?"
"Yes," Mina answers.
There's a moment of silence and then soft fingers trace over her lips, sliding down and immediately into her.
Mina twitches at the intrusion and lets out a strangled grunt, her legs naturally snapping closed.
Wet fingers press again into her knees, commanding, and Mina spreads herself again. She takes deep breaths in and bites into her lower lip as Chaeyoung spreads more lube over her. It's ridiculous.
Mina's soaked, could probably take the most threatening dildo she has at home with no problem, but Chaeyoung continues petting between her legs, shallowly sticking two fingers inside of her and pulling them back out. In and out, in and out.
Mina's clit pulses with her arousal. She feels almost light headed with the effort of controlling herself, of continuing the façade of not being aroused. She wants to grab her tits and hump Chaeyoung's fingers wildly.
She wants Chaeyoung to fuck her.
"I'm going to insert the speculum now," Chaeyoung tells her.
"If you feel any pain or significant discomfort, let me know."
"Okay," Mina breathes out, her voices small and breathy.
Cold metal presses against her vagina and she forces her muscles to relax, letting it slip inside, nearly whining at the stretch. It must go in wrong, a bad angle or something, because Chaeyouung pulls it out again, just an inch and pushes it back inside. Mina lets out a small whine.
Maybe Chaeyoung writes it off as a sound of discomfort, or maybe this isn't the first time this has happened to her (Mina wouldn't be surprised if every gay and bi woman in the area makes appointments with her specifically to get off). She ignores Mina's sound and slowly cranks the speculum open until Mina stretched and gaping.
She can feel herself clutch and unclutch, spasming. There's the tiny poke of a cotton swab and then, with no warning, Chaeyoung's finger are pressing into Mina.
She slides in deeply, three fingers full and presses against Mina's interior walls, rubbing her fingers back and forth. Mina's body shakes on the table, tiny little spasms of arousal, and she bites into her lip, muffling herself.
Suddenly, the gown between her legs slides down and she gets a full view of Chaeyoung's face for the first time since they began.
Chaeyoung meets her eye and doesn't smile. Mina's mouth is hanging open as she sucks in sharp little whining breaths. There's sweat on her neck and chest, around her hairline. She knows her skin is flushed. She probably looks like she's in the middle of being fucked.
There's pressure on her clit, suddenly, like a fucking firework shooting sparks behind her eyes, and Mina moans, lurching against the table as her body shudders.
"Sorry," she gasps out, "Oh, my God, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry---"
The thumb against her clit continues stroking her, intentional and hard. Mina whines against the table, her fingers gripping the sides of it until it's painful as she bucks against Chaeyoung's hand.
"Shh," Chaeyoung soothes. Her fingers continue pumping in and out where Mina is held open for her.
"How does that feel, Mina?"
"I don't---" Mina gets out,
"I'm not sure...what are, what are you doing?"
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