A/N: I mentioned earlier the "vocal kids" had an assignment to write a love song. I really like these, some of them you may not know. I put them at the end so give them a listen because they're really beautiful. ALSO??? Set It Off is doing a project with their fans and long story short, I got to call Cody Carson??? Oh my god, I'm still shook over that. I seriously love those guys so much. Cody is a gift to this world. Anyway, that wasn't important but I had to share. Cheerio!

As Saturdays go for me, this one is rather calm. Usually, my friends hang out over the weekend and they are, but not the same kind of hang out. Jenna and Lynn are out at an art museum and I know they're going to a vegan restaurant for an early dinner later. Cody took Amelia to go ice skating. I think Brendon finally asked Sarah to go out to eat too but later. I don't have any plans myself.

Yesterday was...weird. Well, the last two weeks have been weird but yesterday, I don't know anymore. I didn't get a real note. I got one on Thursday. It was on this metallic olive green construction paper. And that flourished handwriting wrote I'm very indecisive and always have trouble picking anything. But without a doubt, you're my favorite everything. ~Secret Admirer I found it in my bag right after English. I thought there would be a little more to it but I told myself that they're probably making a big deal for Friday.

The school was delivering carnations on Friday. I signed out of study hall but before my teacher dismissed me, he gave me a few flowers. I got a pink one from Jenna, which was really sweet of her. And I got also 5 red ones. I looked at the tag but it didn't state who it was from or even the "secret admirer" ordeal. Instead, it just said Monday will mark one for each. And I have no idea what that means. I don't know if that means something's going to happen on Monday or if I'm supposed to just figure this out.

On my way down to art, I was debating if I should put them away in my locker.I decided against it because I kind of wanted to be a little spoiled looking. I thanked Jenna. She gave one to all her friends. I noticed Gerard just glanced up, stared at them and went back to his work. He was acting weird again. What else is new? I wanted to ask if he sent them but I couldn't in front of the others. No need to create unnecessary problems.

I did ask him in history, somewhat jokingly but also serious, if he did send them. He shook his head, laughing and said that he was with me and he didn't go up. Yeah, I should've remembered that. But a part of me sunk. If Gerard isn't doing this, then who is? Like who actually cares enough to bother? I don't really talk to anyone besides my friends and none of them would do this. It doesn't add up.

There was no note at the end of the day either. I was a little disappointed. I mean, the flowers are probably from the secret admirer, especially since the handwriting matched. If they're not, then that's a problem. I really don't want one person crushing on me but two would make me actually want to die. Why can't Gerard just like me? And if he does, why doesn't he have the balls to do something about it? I know I don't and he knows that too so can't he just get on with it? Unless he doesn't like me and that would explain the lack of action.

There's a knock on my door. "Yeah?" I call out, turning off my phone.

My mother opens the door and she smiles at me. She's wearing makeup and her hair is in a simple up-do, "Hey, how are you?"

I give a casual shrug. "I'm good."

She steps into my room. Good thing I did my laundry earlier so she doesn't nark on me. She glances at my dresser and notices the wilting rose and the fresh carnations. "Oh, pretty flowers you have," she says. "Who are they from?"

"Um, the pink one is from Jenna," I say. I'm technically not lying.

"Oh, that's really sweet of her," my mom says. "She like you?"

I narrow my eyes at my mother. "We're...friends if that's what you mean."

"Well, that's good to hear. But she gave you a flower?"

"What are you insinuating?" I ask, sitting up from my bed. She innocently shrugs. "She's dating someone."

"Oh, okay, he's lucky to-"

"She," I correct. My mother's eyes widen. "She's dating Lynn."

"Oh, good for her," she says. Well, that's a good sign. "You okay with that?"

"Yeah, they're really happy and cute. Why wouldn't I?" Before my mom says anything else, I know she's going to ask if I like Jenna. "I'm gay," I blurt out.

The room stays quiet as she smiles at me. Why did I say that? That was really unnecessary. Okay, this is just fine. My mom rests against the door frame and looks at me softly. "That's okay, sweetie," she says. "I want you to know I still love you," she says. I smile at her. She walks over and hugs me. "Do you want to talk?" she asks, brushing my hair out of my face.

"No, I just, I don't know, thought to say since I haven't," I say. "I'm not dating anyone if that's what you're wondering."

She smiles at, ruffling my hair. "Your dad and I are going out, do you want to come with?"

I look at her, glancing down. "Do I have to?"

She starts chuckling. "No, that's what we figured. But we'll bring you back something."

"Thank you," I say as she walks out of my room. "Can you shut my door?" She takes a half step back and shuts it. Well, today seems to be a little crazy. Didn't plan on coming out to my mother when I woke up today. I didn't plan on that when she knocked on my door. My heart is beating a little faster. Well, I didn't get kicked out, not that I thought I would. But that's enough risks for today.

I scroll on my phone, looking at Tumblr screenshots, the occasional vine remix compilations that come up because Gerard, Brendon, and Lynn have all liked them, consequently, spamming my feed. Jenna and Lynn post their Valentine selfies and I see on Amelia's Instagram story that she and Cody are having fun at the ice rink. Sarah posted a picture of her dinner and I see Brendon's phone resting on the table in the very corner of the photo. They're all having fun.

While scrolling, my phone suddenly freezes up and starts buzzes. Half a second later I see Gerard's icon pop up. Reflexively, I swipe to answer it. "Um, hello?" I say.

"H-hello?" Gerard asks.

"Hey, Gee?"

"Wow, you answered that really fast," he chuckles.

"Um, yeah, I was already on my phone and then you called," I explain. It falls quiet and I feel a bit awkward. "So what's going on?"

"So, uh, shit hit the fan," he mutters, "and then the fan hit some shit. Long story short, I got the house to myself. And...if you aren't busy, you wanna stop by?"

A smile spreads across my face. "Well, that depends. What do you mean by stop by?"

"Oh, something along the lines of fulfilling our habit of watching a great movie you haven't seen somehow and then ordering Chinese because I got mad pan fried noodle cravings."

"Done deal," I say, getting off from my bed. "I'll be over in 15," I say.

"You should make that 10," he says. I contemplate play-arguing with him. "Come on, what would take you 1the extra 5 minutes?"

"Fine, 10. See you soon." I hang up and scavenge around my room to find real pants and not my pajamas. Jeans, my only blue jeans. Yeah, those are nice. And a simple long sleeve shirt, maroon. Wow, look at me all decked out for this holiday by color coordinating.

I surprisingly get over there in 10 minutes as he requested. "Hey," he says, answering the door. He's wearing his Journey shirt and a black button up shirt that he's wearing as a jacket with the sleeves rolled up.

"Hey." He shuts it behind me after I step in and I start taking off my shoes. "Parents go out?" I ask.

He shifts. "Yeah, uh, Mikey had a fever so...they took him back to the hospital." I stumble forward while untying my shoelaces and Gerard catches me before I fall. "You good there?" he asks while holding me against him

"Um, yeah," I say, looking up at him. I take my shoe off and then regain my balance. "I'm sorry to hear that."

He pauses, still holding my arms. "You don't have to be sorry," he says. He's keeping his voice as neutral as possible. "But let's talk about something else."

"Okay," I say. He lets go of me and the two of us head to the living room. I can't really ask him what he's been doing. I'm assuming he was with his family when, as he said, the fan hit some shit.

"So how have you been?" he asks, propping himself on the back of the couch.

"It's been...well, I came out to my mom a few hours ago."

Gerard's eyes widen. "Really? How'd that go?"

I nod along. "Um, smoothly. Kind of just happened," I say. He looks at me softly with a sweet smile and I smile back at him, shrugging. "I don't know. I wasn't planning for that to happen."

"You glad it did?"

"Um, yeah, I guess. Not that I had my doubts with them but still good."

"How'd it get brought up?" he asks. He leans back on the couch and almost slips but catches himself.

I laugh, watching him regain his balance. "She noticed the, um, she saw the flowers and I said one of them was from Jenna and then yeah."

"Oh, you tell her about the other person?" I shake my head. I didn't really think that was relevant. "Hey, um, did you get anything else from them?" he asks.

"What do you mean?"

He shrugs. "Well, like did you get a note yesterday or anything of that...sort?" he asks.

"No, just the flowers."

"What?" he cries out. He leans forward, his feet hitting the floor. "Wait, you got nothing else?" I slowly shake my head and he looks at me pensively. "You checked and stuff and that's all you got?"

"Yeah-" Gerard's face eases up but he's still staring at me. He didn't...did he? But I asked him yesterday in class and he said no. But why is he curious about what I got? "Do you know something I don't?" I ask.

"Huh?" he asks.

"Why are you acting weird? Was I supposed to get something else?"

"How would I know?" he laughs. "I was just wondering because it just seemed a little anticlimactic. They didn't tell you who they were?"

"I checked my locker and I didn't get anything," I say.

"What about your bag?"

"Yeah, I also looked. Pretty sure the carnations were it."

"Oh," he mutters, lifting himself back on top of the couch. "I just thought that we'd get to know who was sending you the letters. I mean, I wanted to know and I'm sure you do too."

"Well, it said Monday marks one for each with the flower thingy so maybe I'll find out on Monday."

He narrows his eyes at me. "You know we don't have school Monday, right?"

"What?"

"Yeah, February 16th...it's President's Day. We have off." Well, there goes my idea in figuring out who it was. "Maybe the Monday thing means something else?"

"Phht, like what?" I mutter. Gerard shrugs. I stare at him contemplating. He brought this up. Well, technically I did but he inquired. Still. "Did you send me those?" I ask.

He looks up at me. "What?" he whispers.

"Did you send me those?" I ask again. My heart is beating faster. Frank, you said you weren't going to take any more risks for the day.

"No," he says blankly. "I didn't get anyone flowers. I was with you at lunch when Cody and Jenna went up. And Amelia went up later. I didn't get you those." Yeah, I figured that part out. "Why do you keep asking me this? It's like the third times." He chuckles awkwardly, looking at me concerned.

"Because you're acting weird," I say. Gerard gives me a look and I roll my eyes. "Weirder than usual. And I don't know. I see you enough throughout the day for you to be able to do it. And then there's the whole artist thing. You're good enough to do it. And that deal with the song. I don't know, I just need to ask. None of this makes sense and quite frankly, I didn't ask for this."

He shifts his jaw to the side, thinking of what to say. "You seem to have put a lot of thought into thinking I'm the one doing this." My face starts getting hot as he still is staring at me. "Frankie," he says slowly, "I didn't send you any of those valentines, okay?"

"Okay," I say quickly, cutting him off from saying anything else. "That's all I needed to know and hear." I don't want to talk about this anymore. I don't want him to keep telling me it wasn't him and I especially don't want him asking why I suspected him. If he didn't...whatever. Gerard looks at me and I switch subjects. "Hey, so what movie are we watching today?"

He pauses, shifting his stance a bit. "Well, we got a lot of options, Frankie." He rolls over the couch and flips off on the cushions.

"What's your favorite romance?" I ask. I walk around and take a seat on the couch, leaning against the armrest.

He looks at me and sighs. "Personally, I love 500 Days of Summer."

"I could go for that," I say, leaning back.

Gerard cracks a grin. "Yeah, me too, but Summer is the girl's name. And as romances go, it's like, it's not what you suspect it to be," he says.

"Well, why don't we watch it because I've never seen it."

Gerard grabs the remote and starts flipping through the movie selection. "There are so many good lines in this movie that I feel people need to hear. And it's just one of those stories that shouldn't be forgotten about."

"Is it sad?" I ask. Gerard clicks the movie and doesn't say anything. "Oh no, does one of them die?"

"No, not like that. It's just, it's one of those things about how life gives you something you don't always suspect. You don't always get what you wanted in the end but that doesn't mean you can't find happiness. Just, we'll watch it and you'll understand."

The 20th Century's FOX logo comes up along with the anthem. Gerard sets the remote down on the coffee table and switches off the lights. I hold my arms out as he starts walking back to the couch. He smiles for half a second then lies down on top of me. I wrap my arms around him and he rests his head on my chest, using me like a pillow. The screen fades to black as it starts.

The movie is very nostalgic with a really classy soundtrack and it's really beautiful. The beginning is misleading but the ending kind of makes it seem okay. Like this is how life is and you'll get better. After the movie finishes, Gerard and I still don't move. Our legs are entangled together and my arms are wrapped around him. His one hand is playing his my hair and the other arm is dangling off the couch. I mean, if he wanted to get up, I'd let him go. Me, I can't really get up since he's lying on me. But it's fine.

"Your heart is racing," Gerard says lowly. "I can hear it beating."

"It would be funny if it suddenly stopped," I mutter.

"Um, no!" Gerard says. I start laughing to myself and he sits up just enough to look at me in the eyes. "Please, don't die," he says.

"I wasn't planning on it," I say. He rests his chin on my sternum and I flinch a bit from the pressure.

He smiles, looking up at me. "You want to get Chinese in a bit?" he asks.

"Yeah, that'd be good," I say with a smile. "It's kind of like a date." Gerard slowly sits up, moving off of me. "Wait, no, that's not what I meant," I quickly say. Man, I'm just not thinking today. "I didn't mean it like that, you know?"

Gerard leans back, sitting on top of my legs. "What did you mean?" he asks, staring at me conflicted.

I brush my hair out of my face, sitting up a bit. "I mean like it's funny how we're acting like we're dating but we're not," I quickly say. "Because there's absolutely going on between us. Just not like that, you know?"

"Okay," he says, dragging out the pronunciation.

His eyes are getting dark, staring at me with tension. I can't read him. I swear to god, I'm never talking again once I fix this. "You seem confused," I whisper.

He nods his head. "Yeah, I kind of am," he replies. His face is blank and his voice hollow.

"In a good way or...in a bad way?" I ask nervously.

"In a Gerard Way," he mutters. I sigh, rolling my eyes at him. "So there's nothing going on between us...is there something going on between you and someone else?"

"What? No, no, of course not. I mean, I haven't dated anyone since I moved to California. I don't have anything going on. I mean, technically, you'd be the closest person I'd be with because we kissed and stuff-" Gerard scrunches up his face. I'm making it worse. "No, no! It didn't mean anything! Like, it was just stupid and you only did it to mess with me, remember?" Oh, if he thought my heart was racing before, now I'm going into cardiac arrest. I might as well die from this heart attack because I'm digging my own grave.

"Is that what you really think?" he asks. He sounds angry, his voice gravely while shifting his jaw. My face is getting hot as he glares at me.

I scratch the back of my head, trying to force myself to stay calm enough to prevent my voice from shaking. "Well, it was, it was just stupid dares and that stupid mistletoe and-and you were always the one to initiate them to punk me. So like nothing about it was real and neither of them were real. There's nothing meaningful since it's just stupid. Like, a stupid joke. Just forget I said-"

Gerard lunges himself forward and I shuffle back. My spine hits the arm of the couch and I'm pinned down as Gerard climbs over me. He cups my face and kisses me. At first, we miss. He's too low and we're misaligned. I turn my head to face him and he pulls himself up a bit, kissing my lips this time. It's a little rougher, a little messier compared to before. His fingers loosen their grip as his hands slide down to my chest, grabbing the front of my shirt and pulling me closer to him. My arms are pinned behind me as I fell backward and Gerard's now over me.

He starts pulling away but I catch his lip between my teeth. I open my eyes and I look up at him. He lets go of my shirt, running his hands down my chest to smooth out the fabric. I release him and he pulls away, tucking a strand of my hair behind my ear. "Why'd you, um, what was-what was that for?" I ask, my voice breaking off in the middle. "I-you didn't have a reason do to that."

"Yeah, exactly," he says, moving back to where he was sitting before.

"What?"

He gives a shrug. "You said we only kiss for some stupid dare or whatever reason. So there. No dare, no joke, no reason."

"Okay," I say softly, "but I still don't know what it's for."

"It's whatever you want it to be for," he sighs.