When I wake, it's 7:30 am. I turn over the other direction but Gerard isn't next to me. The blanket is tossed back and all on my side. I stretch out my hand and the sheets feel cold like he left a long time ago. The door is cracked open and a little bit of light streams into the room, enough for me to see that Brendon and Cody are still here sleeping.

I get up, walking quietly out of the room and into the commons. Rachel and Skylar are in the foyer of the hall, putting on their winter gear. "Hey," I whisper, my voice still groggy from just waking up.

They look up at me and smile. "Hey," they say in unison.

"Heading out?" I ask.

"Yeah, last day to go out in the snow so got to make it count," Rachel says, holding up her snowboard.

"Yeah, as if we don't go every other weekend together," Skylar says.

"True," Rachel replies, "but this is the last day we get to go on the trip. We're graduating."

"Yeah," Skylar glances at me, "you're a junior, right?"

"Yep," I say. "I got one more year after this."

The two girls smile. "Well, you probably hear this a lot but you never understand it until it's too late. Enjoy it while it last. You only get to be a kid once and you shouldn't spend it waiting to be an adult."

I smile at them. "Thanks." The two girls head out with their boards.

I walk over to the commons area. Aiden is sitting next to Lulu on the couch talking. "Hey, Frank," Aiden says.

"Hey, what's up?" I ask.

"We're waiting for more people to wake up so we can go eat," Lulu says.

"Breakfast?" I ask. I don't know why I asked.

"Yeah," she says. "We woke up like 15 minutes ago and everyone up already ate and I didn't want to just go without like a group. I don't know."

"Who was all up then?" I ask.

"So Skylar and Rach just headed out and their roommates are still asleep," Aiden says. "Um, who was it?"

"Gerard?" Lulu says. She glances at me. "Is that his name? The really cute boy?"

I stutter a bit. What, does every girl have a crush on him? "Um, my roommate's name is Gerard, yeah," I say. "Did you see him?"

"No," she says. "He left before we were up."

"Yeah," Aiden says, "but Rach and Sky said they saw them leaving when they woke up."

"Who's them?" I ask.

"Uh, Gerard and Moira," Aiden says. I stare at him. "Why?

"Wait, just Gerard and Moira went together, no one else?"

"Yeah, why?" Aiden asks again. He literally woke up so early just to be with her? He left so early, he left when Rachel and Skylar got up. Rachel and Skylar were just leaving and putting on their gear, but that doesn't count when they had breakfast when they got up and got ready for the day. When they woke up, Gerard was leaving with Moira, meaning they were up even earlier. "Frank, you good?"

I look at Aiden. "What? Yeah, I'm just-"

"You seem upset," Lulu says. I don't respond to her. What am I supposed to say? These people don't know me, I can't just throw my personal issues on them. "Hey, why don't you get dressed for the day," he says in a gentle tone, "then we can go eat?"

"Yeah, yeah, sounds good," I say, walking back to my room and closing the door quietly since Brendon and Cody are still asleep. Why did he leave with her? I was with him, he left me to go with her. Granted, it's not like that. He isn't obligated to be with me. But still, he's ditching everyone else. Granted, none of us are really hanging out together. I was with only Brendon really yesterday. And Jenna wasn't with anyone of us the entire day. Cody split off but then he joined back later. I don't know, still.

I hastily get dressed in the dark and then leave with the others. "Hey, where's Lia?" I ask as we step out of the room.

"Oh, she and Sarah are still sleeping," Aiden says. "It was kind of funny," he starts and Lulu laughs a bit at the reference. "So Sarah and I share one bed and then Lulu and Lia share the other. But like they were both asleep and it's pitch black in the rooms since there aren't any windows or like...light. So I'm lying there like man, Sarah is passed out but I'm hungry-"

"Always are," Lulu interrupts.

"Shhh...So I get up and I'm walking around to get dressed."

"Little did he know," Lulu says, "I was lying next to Lia thinking, this bitch won't wake up, I'm bored. So I got up to get dressed before I went to see if anyone else was awake so I kneel on the floor, rummaging through my suitcase."

"The next thing I know, I'm walking toward my bag and I step on something, a body, and I hear this heavy sigh. I swear, I thought a demon was coming for me."

"And I'm looking for a clean pair of pants when I feel something attack me and I'm like... if there is a god, please save me."

"I would've died if I was in that situation," I say, laughing with them. "I have a weird question though."

"What's it?" Lulu asks.

I pause for a moment, thinking of how to word it. "The school let you guys share a room together? Coed?"

"Yeah," Lulu says.

"See, I lean toward guys so they figured it was fine to put me with the girls," Aiden says. "Granted, they asked me and since most of my friends are girls, I was cool with it."

"Oh, okay. That makes sense," I say. "See, my older school wasn't like this so I didn't know."

"Yeah, I get you."

We get to the buffet and there's a lot of people here. Most of them are adults but a few kids from school scattered here and there. The area where it's least crowded only has two teens sitting at it. We walk over to them.

The two of them sit next to each other sharing earbuds and both of them are reading. The guy is reading Simon vs the Homosapien Agenda. He's wearing a blue sweatshirt and jeans, sitting with one of his knees up on the chair. The girl sits next to him crisscrossed, wearing a baggy, mint-green sweater with leggings. She's reading Dear Evan Hansen.

We sit next to them and the guy glances up. "Hey, Aiden," the says with a smile.

"Hey, Jared, Storm, what's up?" Aiden asks.

The girl doesn't reply to him, just turning a page in her book. "Oh, nothing much," Jared says. "We just finished breakfast so we're chilling out."

"Oh my god!" the girl squeals popping her head up at Jared. He looks at her knowingly and smiles softly. "I love this song." She holds the earbud, adjusting it better in its place.

"What are you listening to?" I ask.

"Who Lives, Who Dies, Who Tells Your Story," she says. I look at her, nodding along but I don't know it.

"Hamilton," Jared says, brushing his hair out of his face. "We were listening to my playlist on shuffle and it just came on."

Storm sits dazed while listening to the music with a happy gleam in her eyes. "You act as if this is the first time hearing it," Lulu says.

"Oh, please, this is a fantastic song. It's beautiful."

"You think Hamilton is beautiful," Aiden says.

"It is! And he is!" she cries out. "I'm going to start sobbing."

"Wait, why?" I ask.

"Because, it's so good."

I stare at her confused. "She's always like this,' Aiden says.

"Aide, you get emotional over a good taco," Jared says, picking back up in his book.

"Ugh, well, excuse me!" Aiden says. "Speaking of which, I should go eat."

"It's a little early for tacos," Lulu says.

"It's called a breakfast burrito, thank you very much." I laugh as I get up to go with Aiden to the buffet.

After eating, we head out and go skiing for a bit. When we've given up on falling down the hills, we start a snowball fight. Storm and Jared build a small fort and I start assemble all the snowballs. We stuck our skis and poles in the snow and then mounted snow in between them, using the equipment as support.

I peak my head over our fort and see Lulu and Aiden have made somehow an even larger fort. "Guys, they've got better cover than we do," I say.

"No, we are stronger than them!" Storm says, frantically building faster.

Jared glances over and sees their fort. "Uh, I don't think so, Stormy."

"We will win."

"An why are you so sure of that?" he asks.

Storm looks at Jared. "We have heart."

"Surrender yourself or suffer the consequences!" Aiden screams from the other side.

"Never!" Storm cries. "Vive la France!"

Jared double takes at her. "Who said we were French?"

"We have a barricade!" she cries, then dramatically stares off into the distance. "Do you hear the people sing? Singing a song of angry men!" Her voice is very strong and empowering, and she's surprisingly good. Not that I thought she would be bad but she's definitely gifted.

"You're life is not a musical!" Lulu screams. Storm gasps out. She grabs on of the snowballs at hurls it at Lulu. "Duck and cover!" Lulu cries, tackling Aiden down.

"This is war!" Aiden shouts from the other side.

The five of us have our battle, throwing snow back and forth at each other. Jared has a pretty good arm, hurling it very accurately. Storm and I, on the other hand, tend to miss terribly. Either too short, too far, way too left, way too fight. If we're lucky, we actually hit their fort. Aiden is decent at throwing it, but most of them are too high. Lulu is probably the best out of all of us.

"Oh no, I'm hit!" Jared cries out, stumbling back and falling over.

"Jared, no!" Storm cries out. "How dare you!" She crawls over to him, frantically shaking his shoulders. "Jared, stay with us!"

"Go on without me!" he manages before "dying".

"Your friend is gone!" Lulu cries out. "Surrender or suffer a similar fate!"

As soon as she says that, Aiden throws a snowball about 2 feet too short. Storm and I glance at each others laughing. "You keep throwing them like that and they have nothing to worry about," Lulu says.

"Allura! You're on my side," Aiden whines at her. She just sticks her tongue at him. Aiden chucks a snowball at us and it does get fairly close. The two of us duck our heads at it flies over us. "Surrender already!"

"We die with honor!" I scream. I grab three snowballs and hike over the barricade.

"Frank, don't sacrifice yourself!" Storm cries out. I run toward them with a battle cry.

"Take cover!" Aiden screams. I throw the snow at them at point blank and the tuck and roll out of the way. I quickly turn around and start sprinting back toward Storm. Before I make it back, one of them hits me in the leg with a snowball and I dramatically collapse to the ground.

"Frank! No!" Storm cries. I struggle to get up, hobbling back toward her when I get hit in the side. I fall over again, crying out in agony. Dragging myself inch by in, I'm hit again in the shoulder and I fall face down in the snow.

"You are on your own! All your friends are dead!" Lulu shouts.

"Give up your guns or die," Storm sings, looking around dramatically. "Damn their warnings, damn their lies! They will see the people rise! Damn their warnings, damn their lies!" She stands up and throws a snowball at them, hitting Lulu square in the chest. She falls backward and I don't see her once she's behind the fort. "They will see the people rise!"

Aiden stares at her with a frozen expression and then he glances down at Lulu. "Never antagonize a theater nerd."

We don't even realize how much time has passed. Even Aiden didn't realize we all skipped lunch. We all head inside, walking down to our hall.

"It's a little after 5 o'clock so we have almost an hour to kill before we can eat," Lulu says. "Well, if we're hungry then that is."

Aiden opens the door and he and I step in first. As soon as I do, my heart drops. Gerard is kissing Moira. All the others are sitting on the floor in a circle in the commons. Brendon, Cody, Amelia, Skylar, Rachel, Jenna, they all sit around the two of them. Moira is leaning over Gerard on her hands and knees kissing him and he's sitting there with his legs stretched out smiling.

The rest of us stop, standing in the foyer staring confused. Well, they are confused, I'm...there are no words to describe what I am. Why is this happening? "Well, then," Aiden finally says.

The two of them pull away and look. "Oh, hey guys," Cody calls out, leaning over on his side.

"What are you doing?" Storm asks confused.

Moira sits back, but she's still kneeling in front of Gerard really close. Gerard's smile slowly fades when he sees me staring at him, immediately brushing his hair out of his face. His lips are tinted red from her lipstick. My chest tightens up. We make eye contact for a second before I look away, staring at the ground. "We were all just talking and stuff but then we started playing spin the bottle," she says in her British accent.

"Yeah, we were bored," Brendon says, his lips slightly purple. I'm assuming he's kissed Skylar as she has a dark violet lipstick on. They're playing spin the bottle. Gerard, Moira, Brendon, Cody, Amelia, Skylar, Rachel. Jenna is sitting on the couch outside the circle.

"All of you?" Lulu asks.

"Well, not Jenna," Cody says.

"My girlfriend isn't here, I don't really want to be kissing other people even if it is just a game," she says.

"You don't have a bottle," I say.

"Oh, I downloaded an app," Moira says.

"Sure you did," I mutter, biting my lip. "You guys didn't have anything else to do?"

"We were just bored," Amelia says. "You guys want to join?"

"I'm going to pass," I say, quickly walking out of the commons and into my room. I don't know if the others are joining them but I don't care. I just want to be alone. I get to my room and I shut the door behind me, quickly locking it. Why is this happening? Why is he with her?

I crawl on my bed and grab hold of the pillow I've been use, hugging it tightly. I don't realize how much that hurt until my face stings with tears and I forget how to breathe. It hurts so much. Even though I'm losing something I never had. He was kissing her. He's been spending all his time with her today. I didn't even see him this morning as we shared the same bed together. He left early to go be with her. Why is he doing this? Why does he like her and not me? What did I do wrong? No, that's not fair of me to act. He doesn't owe me anything. He is allowed to do what he wants. I just wish...

I lie back, trying to catch my breath. I like him so much. He makes me so happy, well, except for now. I don't know what it is about him but he is everything to me. I don't know when this started but it doesn't matter anymore because it's not going to stop. I like him. No, what I feel is more than I that. I love him. And I can't help it.

I can hear the others giggling from the commons. "Brendon, close your mouth!" Aiden screams followed by an eruption of giggling.

"You didn't let me finish talking!" Brendon retorts. So the others have joined this game. It's still going on. Gerard's still playing.

I never thought I'd be the jealous type. Then again, when I thought that, I didn't know Gerard. I need to go for a walk, clear my head. I need to get away. Well, first I need to stop crying. I don't even mean for the tears to fall, they just spill from my eyes and trickle down my cheeks. By the time, I cool down enough to be presentable, I head out of the room and start leaving.

"Hey, Frank, where you going?" Jenna asks. I don't answer her.

"Frankie?" I know it's stupid Gerard calling for me with his goddamn nickname he gave me. I don't answer him either, I just walk out.

As soon as the door shuts behind me, I feel the tears threatening to come again. No, don't start this now. There's a commotion going from inside. It sounds like they're moving around. They better not be looking for me. Better leave before they open the door. I start jogging down the hallway without a real sense of direction. I turn down one of the hallways and realize that this is where the arcade is. A couple of kids from the trip are down here but it's not overly crowded. This is a good place to take refugee. It's dark is, minus the colorful lights from the machine. Nobody will really be paying attention to me.

"Hey, Frank?" Huh, I was wrong.

I turn around nervously and see Lia running over to me. "Oh, hey," I say feeling a million times better the second I see her. "I'm really glad your here."

"You've come to play?" she asks.

"Um, not exactly. I was just going exploring around here," I say. "What are you up to?"

"I have been playing Galaga and Dig-Dug for like 3 hours, not lying," she says. "Hey, they have Fire Boy and Water Girl here but it's two players, want to join me?"

I smile, easing up a bit. "Yeah, I'd love to," I say.

The two of us walk through the arcade toward the game. "You okay? Your seem, you're voice seems different."

"Puberty," I mutter.

She chuckles a bit. "Yeah, no, that's not what I meant. It's weak. Are you upset?"

"Damn," I mutter.

"What?" she asks.

"Nothing, just I'm...it's complicated," I say.

"Usually when people say it's complicated, it's actually very simple. They just think it's not." I nod along. "Am I wrong?"

Well, she's not. It's really simple. I like Gerard and I thought I stood a chance with him but lately, it seems he has other interests. "It's just high school mush, nothing important." I answer her.

"Well, we're in high school right now so it's important to you right now."

I sigh, giving in. I trust Lia, she's a stranger. And it's really easy telling a stranger your problems because you have nothing to lose and nothing to worry about them figuring out since they don't know you. "Well, if you insist," I say. The arcade games here are free to play since none of the games are prize based. As the game begins, I start rambling to her. "There's this person I like...a lot. We're like best friends, always together and we are really close. It seemed like they liked me too because when it's just us, we're kind of cuddling and leaning on each other and stuff like that. But I'm realizing I may be wrong."

"Yeah, and why is that?" she asks. Somehow, she is fire boy and I am water girl. Whatever, gender is a construct.

"Just...they don't really seem interested in me at all. Lately, they've been hanging around this other person and-"

"It's a guy, isn't it," Lia says. I flinch and end up falling into a trap. "Oh, I'm sorry," she giggles.

"I didn't say it was a guy," I mutter, going over my word choice in my head.