"August go home." I hiss in frustration.

He took me to work this morning.

He didn't leave.

It's driving me insane.

"I am happy here." He grins as he sits on my freaking desk. I was working with David today, the nephew, remember? The guy who is genuinely an ass.

August doesn't care.

"You'll get me fired." I groan, pulling on his sleeve for him to get down.

Last night was messy. As in, he was a mess when we went to bed. He wasn't touchy or anything, not more than usual, but he just fucking talked. Bullshit. He just talked and talked all this shit that I had no idea how to keep up with.

Like I fully didn't keep up, I fell asleep.

He was miserable this morning, come downs, but he said he'd take me to work and when I asked what he'd do whilst I was here his literal answer was to distract me.

It was hard work.

"August please go sit back down." I whisper. "Dave is gonna shout at me and I canny be bothered today."

"Don't worry, I'll get him if he does."

"August." I groan. "If he shouts at me he'd be right to because you're not allowed back here."

His hands pulls me to him by my skirt and I bump against his chest and I shake my head at him.

"Leo behave."

"I hated Leo. Like nicknames for people who you don't fucking know is strange as Emersyn."

"But I know you." I whisper.

"Yeah now you do."

I smile, looking down.

He said I know him.

God I am such a girl.

"Right." I exclaim. Pulling on his collar and getting him to get off the desk as I walk backwards. "Out, go, round there, where you were sat peacefully for an hour."

"I was asleep." He admits. "Now I am wide awake."

"August did you even sleep at all last night?"

"Well this morning." He tells me and I grab my pile of books I have to put back and I nudge him out of my little welcome desk.

"What time?"

"Why does it matter?"

"Because you aren't getting enough sleep." I say gently, walking close so my shoulder brushes his arm. "I am just worried."

"Well stop." He says and he takes the books from my hands. "I'll do this."

"August you-"

"I am smart enough to know where they go."

"I know you are smart but-"

"Bye." Is all he says and he looks at the first name and jogs away from me.

"Visitors are not allowed to reorder the boo-"

"Alright David I get it." I snap, turning to look at him and he just pushes his glasses up his nose and shakes his head at me. "You try telling him that."

David shrugs, heading to go towards August and I pull him back.

"I was joking. Don't do that."

"Get your hand off me." He says, turning his nose up at my hand on his arm.

"Jesus." I mutter, letting go and David just tuts, heading away from me.

I go back behind the desk, waiting to see if any visitors come to use the library and not moments later August returns empty handed.

He throws me a smirk and he takes a seat back down at his little table.

There was no way he put the books back in the correct places

None.

Oh goodness.

He's so chaotic.

He lays his head down on his arms, watching me and I just let him, hoping maybe I will distract him enough, so he doesn't get too bored and come and bug me again. I hurry around my little station, typing in some requests for books that have been made and then when a few kids come in I send them a smile and a soft welcome and one of them asks if they can reset their internet pin so I just go through the motions for that.

I look up and I smile back at August. He had a warm smile on his face.

Yes you read right, a warm fucking smile.

"You are good with kids." He says.

"Don't look all warm inside." I say, my voice carrying in a place where we are supposed to be being quiet.

Out of curtesy of the other students, I guess, August gets up and walks back over to my desk so we were a meter apart.

"Are you saying I am not warm inside?" He asks.

"Yes."

He smirks.

"True."

"I am joking you are very warm inside August."

"I bet you're warm inside." He says, a suggesting smirk on his face and I screw mine up.

"Dirty Em, I meant because you're so good with kids."

"Okay go away now."

"You know, it's psychologically proven that men seek-" He starts and I lift my hand up to his lips.

"Leo please no more facts-"

"It was gonna be a compliment."

"Well I don't need your compliments." I say and he gives me a smirk.

"But Luella's not here to call you beautiful anymore so someone has to."

"I don't need anyone telling me I am beautiful out of obligation August, go on, sit back down."

He sighs heavily and walks away from me just in time because an old couple come in, they're regulars they just grab a book and do their own thing but the old man ignores me every time where as his wife always stops off and has a chat.

"Heya beautiful." She grins and August snorts, as if he found that hilarious considering our previous conversation and the woman, her name is Polly, turns to look around at the noise. He looks down at my phone.

Yes my phone.

I deleted anything he shouldn't see and I gave it to him during the first hour of him tapping his fingers on the table.

"Hi." I smile. "You returning as well as picking?"

"Mhm." She hums, putting some books on the trolly and I smile at her. "How's your day been dear?"

"Er pretty good thank you."

"Good." She smiles. "You know what we just went and had coffee up at that little-" She continues to talk about her little coffee date with her husband and I nod along. But I cant help but notice August standing up behind her and walking off into the main fiction book shelves.

For goodness sake.

I nod and reply the appropriate conversational responses and then as she goes and David returns to our desk, admittedly very grumpy I slip out and head towards where I saw August going.

Was he high still?

Honestly though.

Had he sneaked something this morning when I was getting ready?

Being surrounded by books made me think back to the time I collapsed these very same shelves. It was embarrassing. And it hurt.

"You know. This is my favourite book." He says and I turn around to find him peaking at me through a gap in the book case.

"Which one?" I ask, walking back round to meet him.

"This one." He says, starting to hand me it and then he tosses it, right over the shelves.

"What the fuck." I whisper, amusement edging into my tone and he just smirks.

"Decided it was a secret."

I listen for any sound of pain or anything, instead I just head a little thud.

"You have too many secrets." I mutter and he shakes his head.

"No you have too many secrets."

"What do you mean." I laugh. "You- if you wanted to know everything about me- you would. I am an open book."

"Yeah well I am not a fan of reading." He mutters and I just shake my head because I know for a fact he does read.

What?

"What are we talking about?" I ask bluntly and he tosses me my phone back, making me scramble to catch it.

"You've deleted your text messages with Luella and Rayne."

I stare up at him, watching his face. "Yes and?"

"Before you gave me your phone I assume?"

"yeah." I reply honestly. "August you shouldn't have been snooping in my messages anyway."

"I was curious." He says and I just shake my head at him. Then he moves closer and I know the usual little dance we do. I don't play along.

I lift my hand to his chest and keep him at a distance.

"I deleted them because they have secrets of theirs on there and also because I am a girl August, I talk to my friends about the boys I like, I didn't want you to read it and freak."

"You didn't want me to read that you like me? But you just admit it openly anyway?"

"I am nothing if I am not honest." I whisper and his hands push mine that are keeping him at a distance away.

"You like me?" He asks.

I roll my eyes.

"Stop with the attitude."

I smile a little.

"August I know you only do casual, I understand that when you kiss me, you may just be messing around but I don't do casual. I don't do casual feelings, so, sorry."

He snorts a little. "So sorry?" He repeats.

"Yep, like I don't know what else to say. You won't get rid of me, not until I literally leave and so what are ya going to do?"

"So you don't just fancy me?"

"No August." I laugh. "I have feelings."

"You're a kid Em."

"I am a couple of years below you, chill." I say, rolling my eyes at him again as I am pressed gently against the book shelf.

"I am just saying you are naïve."

"What am I naïve about August? I know you don't do relationships. I know you don't do feelings and shit like that. I know you won't touch me. I just don't see how any of those things mean I have to stay away."

He places his hands either side of me, gripping a hold of the book shelf and I am just sort of- open. Open in all honesty.

"Because you're going to get hurt."

"Better to get hurt than not feel at all."

He smiles a little. It's bitter. "You basically just told me that liking me is your own little way of self harm Emersyn."

I pause, eyebrows pulled together as I search his eyes.

"I am not hurting though." I whisper. "You're saying I am going to get hurt. Going being the operative word."

He nods.

"Then just don't hurt me."

August breath leaves his lips a tad unsteady. "Emersyn it doesn't work like that, I don't work like that, you know this."

I shrug. "Do better."

"Em." August frowns. "You deserve better."

I nod. I do. "Be better then." I whisper. "Because I only want you."

"You are stressing me out. I don't do this Emersyn. Plus I- we-." He exhales in frustration and his lips dip, pressing a small kiss on the corner of my mouth. "I know what this feels like but I also feel a lot right now. As soon as I am back on my medication Emersyn I'll be back to being me."

"Being you?" I ask, lifting my hands to his chest.

"And I won't be able to stand you again."

I scrunch my nose up, digging my fingers a little into his chest in annoyance and he chuckles.

His lips lower to my ear.

"Emersyn."

His voice is slow, deep and I tilt into it, pressing my head against his and he lowers one of his supportive hands to my hip and he starts to hold it firmly as we just listen to each other breathe.

"I like when you get slightly annoyed and your nails dig into me. You did it yesterday as well. It's such a fucking turn on."

"It is?"

"Mhm." He hums. "You're so innocent in such an un-innocent way it drives me insane."

"I am not that innocent." I whisper.

August lets out an annoyed breath. "You are."

"You still want me to go fuck someone else so I can come pay you a visit in a few years?"

His hand tightens possessively.

"Yes and no. Yes because this fucking pull is mental. And no because if you fucked anyone else I would be mad."

"Mad?" I ask.

He nods, laying his forehead down on mine, and our eyes are closed, deep in the way it feels to be this close to each other.

"It's a new feeling Emersyn."

"So you don't want me but you also don't want others to want me?"

"It's a cliché isnt it?" He chuckles. "And I want you Emersyn." He pulls back, opening his eyes. "I just cant."

"Why?" I whisper.

"You know why." He says and I roll my eyes and very quickly the hand that was holding my hip firmly slides round and pressed hard against my back, making every inch of my body against his front.

"I said stop rolling your eyes at me."

"And I said don't go through my phone." I bite back, with just as much strength and he narrows his eyes at me and his hand pressed even firmer, making me squish against him.

"I was going to text your father and then I realised you had no texts from Lue and Rayne, it was fishy."

There was a distinct clearing of throat and my head snapped to the right to see Dave looking directly at me.

For fuck sake Dave.

Who even is a Dave?

David.

Urgh.

August lets me go and I walk towards David, passing him and he trails back with me.

"This is not a bring your dog to work day Emersyn."

I turn around slowly. "Pardon?"

"I am saying that you cannot bring random people to work-"

"Oh changed from animal to person when you saw my face huh?" I snap, turning back around and Dave follows me.

"I didn't mean it in any other way than you cannot bring your boyfriend to work. You can't sneak off with him and-"

"And what?"

"Knoodle."

"Oh grow up." I mutter to the um, much older person than me.

Not much older. Like twenties I guess.

"I am serious." He says. "I will tell my Aunt."

"Stop." I say, heading behind the desk and he follows. August after a few minutes of whatever he was actually doing follows us and he sits down at the table a little bit away from us, the one with all his things on.

David is silent, pensive and I just carry on doing my job.

"Emersyn red stickers on returns not pink."

"These are red." I mutter in confusion, picking them up and looking at them in the sunlight and okay, fair enough they're like dark pink.

"Silly girl." He huffs and my head rises in frustration.

"It was an accident, I couldn't-"

"If you have a disability with colour you should have put that in your resume."

"I don't-"

"Well clearly you're just a fucking moron then."

"Enough." August snaps and both our heads snap up to his.

This sis usual work banter August. Not banter. just Dave bullying me. Yanoe, the usual.

I sigh. "It's kay Leo."

He just shakes his head, looking directly at David and David looks down again. We fall into silence and I rip of all the pink stickers and five minutes later David laughs.

"Why the hell didn't you re-stick the pink stickers to the backing? Why bin them? Do you have any clue about money and resources?" His eyes dart down me and I panic because as Dave continues his little rant August gets up. "Obviously not, you look like a spoilt bitch anyway."

His collar is grabbed and by the fist August pulls Dave halfway across the desk.

"What the fuck are you saying?"

My eyes are wide, looking around if anyone is watching and then I slap my forehead because what I should have been doing is getting the scary guy off the asshole.

"August chill." I whisper. Oh God.

Dave is dropped. Poor Dave.

Actually fuck you Dave.

"Emersyn." August says, his voice unimpressed and I look at Dave.

"Apologise." I say to David.

"No." He laughs and August tenses and I immediately lift my hand to block any sort of attack. Not that there was any and now I just look like a freak waving my arms around.

Anyway.

"David you are so rude to me, apologise now."

"I am not apologising to you just because you have a thug-"

I shrug, interrupting him. "Then I quit."

His eyes widen.

I realised that okay, although I probably shouldn't have based this off August's reactions, I am done putting up with this shit. August showed me that I wasn't just being sensitive. That Dave was being awful.

"You what?" He asks and the look on August's face says the same thing.

"I quit." I say, taking my name badge off. "I don't need the money, I got it, I don't need this job, I just fucking quit."

"You can't just quit."

"Watch me." I walk back around the desk and jog off into the staff room to grab my bag and cardy and then I am off, rushing back, adrenaline I think pumping through my veins and I grab August's shocked hand I pull it out of the automatic doors, running a little as we headed to the car park.

"You just quit."

I look back at him. "Yup."

"Rash? We could have just got the asshole fired."

"Nope. It was needed."

Plus I will have more free time now before i go away.

Then August chuckles, catching up with me and I am wrapped in his arms from the back, my legs lifting up and he laughs as he carries me a few paces in his embrace.

"What the hell." He says and I just laugh, skipping over to his car.

"Don't what the hell me Leo, you're the one who almost attacked him."

"Well." August chuckles. "Only I can call you a spoilt bitch, you know?"

I grin at the floor.

"That was exciting." I say. "Let's do something else exciting."

He grins.

"You know... one of your things was to make out in a car."

"It was now was it?" I smirk, waiting for him to unlock his car doors.

"It most definitely was."

"That's not very exciting." I say, smiling at him as he walks over to his side.

He looks offended.

I am joking obviously, kissing August is so fucking exciting.

"Well fuck off then."

I grin, getting in the car before he can stop me and when he gets in, I see the smirk on his face.

He turns the car on and then we end up driving to the cliffs.

And then he tells me to get in the back seat and well I don't protest.

....

We stopped kissing because some people came, and I got embarrassed.

It's really hard not to get like, hot and heavy as we made out. Like I don't get how you just keep it PG. It's literally impossible.

So I was sat, straddling him admittedly, but just sat playing absentmindedly with the bottom of his top and August was just watching me.

"You wanna party tonight?" He whispers.

I look up at him. "Leo we should really talk to parents tonight."

He raises an eyebrow. "They know I am fine, they know you're fine. May as well celebrate the fact you left your job."

"Celebrate?"

"Mhm." He says. "A rare disappearance of Nice Em, deserves booze and celebration."

"You wanna drink?"

"I wanna get so drunk that we can't see straight."

I sit back and he lifts his arms to hold me so I don't lose my balance.

He never makes me feel heavy but like I know I must be hurting his thighs by now surely?

"But you got high yesterday?" I ask.

He nods. "That was yesterday. You're telling me you don't wanna get drunk?"

I shrug. "I don't mind." I say. "But you'll drink or you'll do coke?"

He grimaces a bit. "I was a mess yesterday. Sorry. I just- I didn't know when I told the guys to come round you'd be staying."

"But you did it anyway." I say quietly, searching his face.

"I know. That's why I am apologising."

"So you aren't doing it tonight?"

"Not if I drink, you shouldn't mix the two."

"Why?"

"It like turns into this other drug."

I lift an eyebrow in interest.

"No Em, it's pretty much toxic." He scorns and I just smile amused that he read my face so easily.

Open book, you know?

"Shall we go shopping?" I ask. "For the party."

August smirks. "Nah Trev and I will do it later."

"Okay." I whisper. "Um so although I wanna come back with you..."