-

"Em?"

"Em." August whispers as he squats by my head, his hand on my shoulder.

My eyes open, realising I fell asleep and I sigh a little upset that he was waking me up.

"I am sorry." I whisper back, going to sit up and I take a look at him. He was wet still, his towel wrapped around him and I didn't even have the energy to make a remark. Like he was hot, he knew he was hot.

"It's okay. Sleep if you want to. I just thought I'd wake you up since I knew you were going to text your mum and dad."

"Oh." I mumble, reaching for my phone but admittedly lying back down.

I didn't have any messages from them and that made me feel relieved, at least they weren't worrying or anything.

I send mum a quick text, telling her where I was and then my eyes watch August as he too seemed tired as he walked around the room to grab some shorts out of his draws.

"It's fucking hot already and it's only half six." He says more to himself than me and I try to subtly move under his duvet, wanting to snuggle up despite him reminding me of the warmth.

Ignoring my presence, he slides his shorts up under his towel and I try not to gasp as he flashes me his ass a little, he couldn't give a damn, I was just snuggled up in his bed watching him.

"I can feel your eyes on my back Emersyn."

"To be honest they were on your ass for a second there."

He snorts, turning around to see just my eyes, the covers raised up high.

"What are you doing?" August asks, walking towards me.

"Sleeping."

He smiles a little and then kneels on the bed, unlocking the window and opening it wide so the morning breeze joined us. He looked down at me. "Are you going back to sleep?"

I want him to sleep. So I don't know.

My hand slides out of the covers and I reach for his wrist that was still close to the windowsill. Delicately I wrap my hand around him and I pull him down, not harshly or anything but he slumps down next to me.

And then I close my eyes.

He goes to get up and I sigh.

"August sleep."

My eyes open again, and he just is on his side, looking at me.

"No."

"Please? It's not weird. I sleep in bed with Rayne." Shit Emersyn that doesn't help. "I sleep in bed with Lue and with Trev like don't overthink everything."

"I just don't want to piss my brother off Emersyn, I already messed up a lot there."

"He won't know, just sleep, we aren't doing anything bad."

August gives up, relaxes sort of. Okay was I in the wrong here?

"Or I can go sleep on the couch." I whisper. "Sorry."

"Sleep Em."

"Aug-"

"Just sleep."

And so I reclose my eyes and settle with him next to me, letting myself relax with the cool breeze flowing through the room. August stays almost deadly still for a little bit, but then he sighs, and he moves and gets under the covers too.

"Why are you so tense?" I whisper and August chuckles a little.

"Because you're close."

I slide myself closer. "Not that close."

"Em." He states in annoyance and I just sigh. He always pulls me to him, he always finds his hands on my waist, but he always makes me feel stupid when I seek the same touch that he initiates.

I move a little closer. "Have you not slept in the same bed with a friend before? Like a girl, why are you so weird about it?"

"You know why. And yes Emersyn I've slept in the same bed as a girl before, but not a girl who I am not fucking."

Then fuck me.

Jesus brain calm down. Brain. I mean hormones.

It's my hormones.

"Cuddling isn't that deep." I mumble, opening my eyes and I find him arm under the duvet and I push it up so I could move under it, he doesn't protest but he lays still as a freaking board when I place my head on August's chest and press myself against his side.

"It's good for you." I whisper. "Like actually though." I lift my head to meet his eyes. "It produces oxytocin."

He sighs.

"Oxytocin is a hormone."

"Yes Emersyn I know this."

I lean my head back down and I get comfy with my cheek placed on his chest. "You know a lot."

"Studied instead of focusing on trauma." He mumbles. "Worked up until a couple of years ago."

"Why'd it stop working?"

"Who knows." He chuckles and then the fucker turns into me, wrapping his arm other arm around me and I am squished, my face in the crook of his neck.

Oh no.

Emersyn don't sniff.

He smells so good though.

Breathe normally.

I let out a shocked staggered breath, August's head above mine on the pillow and mine supported by his arm and his neck, I wrap my free arm over his side, hugging him to me and he stays silent.

We were fully, utterly wrapped up within each other and I knew in usual circumstances my heart would be racing, but instead, it had attached itself to the stead rhythm of August's and I relaxed.

"You tell anyone about this Emersyn, and I won't speak to you again." He mumbles and I just slide one of my legs between his and in no ways did this feel the innocent cuddle like I wanted, but as he moved closer to me, I just slipped further and further into the state of complete freaking safeness.

Shit.

"I wont." I whisper against his skin, unsure whether he heard, but his arm wrapped tighter around me, so I gathered he understood.

....

Waking up with August's head on my chest was a slight fucking surprise.

His arm was thrown over my stomach, our legs still tangled but somehow he was still asleep when I woke up, somehow we had gotten into this position and somehow we must have slept for hours.

I knew it must have been so long because the sun was beaming in at us, it was so warm, the covers kicked away down my waist as I must have gotten too hot.

I stare down at him, how can I fucking not?

He's the opposite from a soft human being, literally, but here he is and, in the moment, he seems so freaking innocent almost? Fragile, I guess. I don't know.

I hear my phone vibrate and I reach for it, trying not to disturb him.

How the hell have things changed this much?

I just read my message.

The time read just passed eleven and I was shocked to see the amount of hours August and I had spent this close to each other.

He's going to wake up grumpy, cold. I can feel it. He's going to panic at the closeness.

I am trying to get myself ready for it.

I say this, but then instead of slipping out from under him, instead of moving so he wouldn't freak out, I lift one of my hands and softly trace his skin with my nails, up his arm and along his back, just tickling him softly.

I do this whilst I reply to Luella.

I send this and hear a door open. Oh shit. She must have walked out of Trev's looking for me.

I reply quickly.

I hear her laugh from behind the door.

Please don't come in Lue, he'll be stressed.

I sigh and I lay my hand flat down on his arm, and then I stress because he's actually a fucking lump and how was I going to escape?

I try to move out from under him and honestly, I can't, he's pinning me down.

Ha.

Oh goodness.

"August?" I whisper, trying to push him off me a little.

He doesn't respond.

Is he okay? He's like dead asleep.

Scary.

"August." I say louder, harsher because I was slightly concerned and he startles, his eyes wide, pulling away from me quickly.

I sit up, not sticking around for the coldness I am sure I would be met with if I tried to talk to him right now. So I grab my phone and I get out of bed, making my way to the door.

I turn around to just check that he was okay and I smile a little when he was still laid in bed, his eyes reclosed.

Cool okay.

I leave, pulling a face at Luella when she was stood directly outside of the door.

"You okay?" I ask quietly, pulling August's bedroom door shut behind me.

She waves that off. "Why wasn't I allowed in?"

I frown. "Because you are loud, and August is asleep."

Her face falls. "Oh. Boring."

Trev comes out the bedroom and he smiles a little at me. "Your foods in the fridge Emersyn."

I swallow. But then I nod. Apples and orange juice. I forgot about that.

I walk over to the fridge and Luella follows me. "You are in his clothes."

"Whose?" I ask innocently, opening the door of the fridge and I cringe a little at the smell. Boys.

I grab the apple slices out and turn around to her.

She is looking at me unimpressed.

"Yeah I showered Luella and then we slept. Problem?"

She throws Trev an amused look and he just sends me a smile when I look over at him.

"No problem at all Emmie girl."

"You seem in a good mood." I say softly, opening the bag and throwing a slice between my teeth.

"I am obsessing over you and August and not thinking about the fact I need to take these tests."

I nod, offering her an apple piece and she shakes her head. I turn to Trev, offering him some and he shakes his head slowly at me.

"No blue they are yours."

I just toss another into my mouth and look at Lue.

"You wanna do the tests on your own, or with me, or with Trev? I can even wake Leo." I laugh a little.

She looks between us and then she throws Trev a guilty look.

He just nods, knowing she doesn't want him there.

"Can you come with me, we do the tests and then I will get you to send Trev in when we know?"

"Yeah." I say softly, grabbing my orange juice out and I try to leave my apple slices behind but she grabs them and follows me into Trev's room with them.

"Don't even like apples." I smile, taking them back.

"Emersyn I've seen you eat apples."

Oh whatever.

I sit down on Trev's bed, crossing my legs and opening the juice.

"Okay go pee Lue."

She sends me a terrified look.

"Luella." I sigh.

"I just- I know it's going to be positive and I just- that's a lot to deal with."

"It is a lot to deal with." I empathise. "But you aren't dealing with it alone."

She nods a little and then opens the bathroom door.

"I am peeing with the door open."

"Go for it." I smile. "Do two tests."

She huffs a little and agrees, grabbing them and then sitting down on the toilet.

"My mum's going to kill me." She says.

"Don't tell her, you're almost twenty. If it's stressing you then-"

"I want to tell her." She smiles. "Like I need my mum. Just- she is going to be angry angry."

I send her a soft smile. "What about your dad?"

"He moved away." She says as she pees. "Like I don't see him much."

"Oh okay."

"There's not like bad blood." Lue says. "He was really good when Grey died, like he helped me so much in those first months. But then he had to go back home, like he has a wife and another kid like and a job-" I nod in understanding.

"Are you done?" I ask and she nods, placing the sticks on the floor and she sorts herself out and then picks them up and walks back into the bedroom.

"I might cry if they're positive, I'm emotional."

I lean my head against her shoulder and nod. "That's okay."

"I just- shit Em." She whispers. "If this was with Greyson I wouldn't even be considering getting rid of it."

"Lue. If you were with Greyson, you would be in a very different position. Don't stress about that."

"I just feel shit." She admits. "I feel like Trev hates me."

"Believe me, Trev doesn't hate you. I am pretty sure he adores you."

"That's even worse." She mutters and then she hands them to me, both turned over so they couldn't show the lines.

She slides to the bedroom floor, sitting crossed legged on the clothe littered floor and she faces me.

"You look."

"Lue." I frown.

"Honestly I can't." She says. "If it's positive, go get Trev. If it's negative I dunno like smile."

I smiled a little at that. "Luella..."

"Please Em?"

"Okay."

I held the two sticks in my hand and I turned them over, scanning them quickly, my heart pounding for her. Shit I hadn't even had sex but this was for sure putting me off.

The two tests in my hands were different, one said a word, one showed lines. Both indicated that Luella was in fact, pregnant.

Goodness.

I look down at her.

"Lue, I recon I should go get Trev."

"Oh fuck." She whispers, staring at me.

I hand her the tests and she looks at them, dropping them to the floor and she presses her fingers against her temples in stress.

She asked me to get him, and although I wanna slide on the bedroom floor and give her a hug, I decide the best thing to do is go and get him.

So climbing off the bed, I walk towards the door and open it. Both August and Trev were now sat on the sofa and they look up, Trev looking extremely nervous and he takes one look at my face and curses.

"Fuck man." Trev whispers to August. "Grey would kill me."

August lays his hand on Trev's shoulder and doesn't say anything. But then Trev nods at me and stands up, walking towards me and when he goes to pass I am surprised he opens his arms for a hug. I walk into it immediately, knowing that just as much as Lue needs comfort, so does he. Okay maybe not as much, but this is stressful for Trev too.

"Go support her T." I whisper and he nods, detangling himself from me and he goes into his room and he closes the door.

I look at August.

"We should give them some privacy today." He says. "I will take you home, I'll go home too."

"Can I come to yours?" I ask.

He frowns and he gets up off the sofa and I follow him into his bedroom. In order to collect my things, but he just pulls a face when he sees that I followed.

"My parents aren't home and I don't wanna be alone." I say.

"Rayne's not at home today." Leo tells me.

"Yeah I know. But you will be, or Lottie will be, or Ivy will be."

He just stays silent and he watches me as I gather my things.

"You look a mess."

I turn to him.

Thanks?

"Okay?"

"If I turn up home with you like that it sends a message."

Like what? I turn towards the mirror and okay my hair is a mess of curls from sleeping with it wet and tangled up with him, his shorts are big on me, his t-shirt bigger and white which sadly was admittedly a little see through. Which was tragic as I have just been parading around without a bra on.

"I have clothes in the car I think." I tell him. "Like I brought a spare dress with me to the beach so I will just slip it on and then..." I walk over to the mirror and I have a hair tie on my hand so I just start braiding my hair so it'll fall down my back, the front still messy and curls frame my face but it sort of looks on purpose.

"I have been around your mum in worse states." I tell him.

"I just don't want anyone to get the wrong idea. We're friends."

I can't help but smile when I hear that word from him.

"August, everyone is just surprised that you are tolerating me. Nobody is going to think anything else."

"Get your shit together then."

"I am ready." I say.

"You haven't even got your shoes on."

"Did I wear shoes?" I ask, genuinely. I was so freaking tired.

An almost smile appears on his face.

"I have no idea."

"You probably shouldn't have driven that tired." I tell him.

"I wasn't even that tired. You all snuggled up made me tired."

I search his eyes for a few seconds, and then drop them. Feeling a little overwhelmed.

I pick up my bag and look around for shoes, and when they aren't here I go and look around the front room, cringing when I can hear Trev and Lue talking in the next room.

By the door are my sandals and I grin at them.

"August, I got them, you coming?" I ask.

He emerges from his room, a bag over his shoulder.

"You staying at home?"

He nods. "Think it best to give them a little space."

I agree. Goodness Lue.

"So you're a big cuddler." I say and his relaxed face hardened, eyes narrowing.

I smile.

"Do you enjoy winding me up?"

"A little." I admit. "You know this."

He just huffs and grabs his keys. "You need to wear a bra."

Heat flooded my cheeks, my arms crossing over my chest.

"No I don't. Not if I don't want to."

He just sends me a small glare. Why was he even freaking looking?

"And keep your eyes to yourself."

"Well it's slightly fucking hard when your nipples are glaring at me Emersyn."

My lips part and I turn my back to him, my face scrunched up because he's an ass and I walk towards the front door and grab my shoes and leave.

I can hear him laughing behind me. It's deep, lazy.

August follows me down the hall.

"You are an ass August."

"Oh it's August now and not Leo?"

I puff my cheeks out, still walking away. "You are only Leo when you are nice or when I think you're hot. You are neither of these things to me right now."

He laughs again and I hate that my lips are picking up at the sound.

In these past few days, I have heard August laugh more than I have in freaking forever. I mean literally, every time I saw him as a kid he was quiet, reserved, moody.

He's still the same, but that paired with his deep uninterested chuckles, well it was getting to me.

No Em. He was just mean.

Sort of. He was just rude.

I nod. Yes that is what he was, rude.

"You weren't complaining about my boobs when you had your head on them earlier." I spit back at him and his amusement dies.

"We are never to speak of that again."

I laugh then, slowing down and I wait for him to catch up with me.

"Cuddling is nice, right?" I ask once he caught up.

"Nah. It's hot and you move a lot."

"I was dead asleep." I say, raising an eyebrow at him.

"Well I wasn't." He presses the button for the lift.

"Oh, so you chose to lay on my chest?" I smirk, looking up at him.

He glowers down at me. "You're comfy. I was tired. I was not in my right mind."

I throw him a playful glare and grin when we get in the elevator and we are alone. The worse thing is when there are other students from the building in here because Leo isn't friendly so it's so awkward. Happy to be alone, I admittedly a little stupidly, lean against his side as stand together in the small box.

He takes a step away from me.

Well okay.

I cross my arms again, looking down at the ground.