The wave of jealousy I felt when Cole told me he had slept with Ariana overwhelmed me. I mean of all people he could sleep with, it had to be my friend. I knew then that I actually had feelings for Cole. Each second I'm with him, those feelings grow larger and larger.

I stood up from my bed and looked at myself in the mirror. Of course he would choose Ariana. She was gorgeous and I was disgusting.

I didn't have the blonde hair, the curves, the pretty blue eyes, the boobs or the ass. I was just me. Ugly and plain Alexa. I stared at myself in disgust, picking out all my flaws.

I was interrupted by a sudden call. I picked it up and answered the call without checking the called I.D.

"Hello?"

"Alexandria?"

I cringe. Only 1 person calls me that.

"Brian, how many times have I told you. It's Alexa. A-L-E-X-A. I don't ever wanna hear my full name ever again. Even the teachers know better than to call me that." I say

"I know I know. I was just teasing." Brian chuckles

"So how are you?"

I launch into my story. I fill him in on everything that has happened. I leave out the details of me liking Cole. He doesn't need to know that. Brian listens intently.

Brian Brians.

I know I laughed too. His grandfather from his mothers side was named Brian and he passed away a month before Brian was born. In his memory, they decided to name him after his grandfather.

Brian is the brother that I always talked about. He's a doctor which is why he was always checking up on me and my health. He's my personal doctor. I never thought Brian cared about me because I never really hung out with him. His parents made sure that we didn't spend time with each other, but he'd always find a way to do so anyways. He's been engaged to his high school sweetheart, Amanda, for a year now. Amanda is a nurse and is a super kind woman. The two actually had their first child really early. The parents weren't too happy about it. They accepted it though because they were their children. They could tell that the two really loved each other and so the parents were willing to help them. When they found out that Brian was planning to marry Amanda when the baby turns 5. They were confused and asked why, he said it was so that they could have a little ring bearer for the wedding. The mothers awwed and allowed it to happen. Their little baby boy was named Axel. They named him after me, but they never told our family about it. I'd meet up with their family 3 times a month in secret. We'd plan a place to meet and we'd see each other.

"Damn sis. A lot has happened to you." Brian says

"I know right."

"Okay so since you live in a proper house now....do you think that you could take care of Axel? It's just that the wedding is coming up and Amanada and I are already frustrated with many things. We need someone to take care of Axel until the wedding." He says

"Dude. I can't just do that" I tell him

"Oh come on. That Marie woman has taken care of babies before. I'm sure she can handle little Axel while you're at school." He reasons

"Why don't you ask your parents?"

"They'll be helping us. We told them we knew a really good babysitter that one of our Aunts recommended." He explains

"Pleeaaassseeee Allie. Axe misses you!!"

"But I have work" I try to think of more excuses

"I'll talk to your bosses about that. Just pleeassseee. We'll even pay you for this!!"

"...Fine." I sigh

"THANK YOU BABY SIS!!!! I LOVE YOU!!! YOU'RE THE BEST!!!" He yells

We discuss where to meet up and he tells me how to take care of him. I'll be meeting up with him tomorrow at the park. After a bit more talking, we finally hang up.

The next day I still had school. I looked at my closet and stared at the huge sweater. Amanda would always buy me new clothes, hoping that I'll get rid of my sweaters. I never wore any of them but maybe it was time for me to change...it was time to throw these darn sweaters. Maybe if I do...maybe Cole will think I'm pretty...

I hesitated and glanced at the mirror. Try new things...just don't listen to any bad comments. You took your medicine so there won't be any...voices...to take you down. You'll be fine...but bring a sweater just in case.

With that decided, I grabbed a black tanktop, black skinny jeans, red flannel, and a black scarf since it was getting chilly. I took a nice steamy shower and then got ready. I blow dried my hair with the hair dryer that was already in the restroom. I put on my clothes and put on a black beanie on as well. Pairing the outfit with my black converse, I looked at myself in the mirror.

I smiled widely as I actually looked pretty decent. I didn't look so bad... It wasn't a complete flop. Hmm...the medicine seems to really be working today. I guess this is what happens when I actually take them and not be stubborn and take them only when I feel like it.

I went downstairs and saw Marie and Cole eating breakfast. Cole looks up and is about greet me, but he stops and stares at me with wide eyes. His eyes looked at me up and down. He was checking me out.

"Damn." Was all he said

I felt gidddy knowing that I left him speechless. He actually saw me as attractive for once! I gave him a smile and took a piece of toast.

"We better get going Cole. Don't wanna be late for school" I say

He nods, still speechless. He goes out to open the car but I stay inside to talk to Marie for a while.

"Marie, will it be okay if my little nephew stays with us for a while. His parents are really busy and they want me to take care of him. You just have to look after him while I'm at school. I'll be taking a break from work so I could take care of him." I say

Marie's eyes lighten up. She smiles widely and claps her hands

"Yes yes of course!!! I would love some company here!! I miss dealing with little children. Oh!! This is so exciting!! I will prepare a room immediately!!" She says excitedly

"No need Marie. He'll be staying in my room." I say. She nods and I thank her. I get into Cole's car and he grins at me.

"You look gorgeous. You should really get rid of the sweater. Don't be ashamed of to hide yourself because you're beautiful." Cole says, making me blush bright red

"I just wanted to try." I shrug

We do the same thing we did yesterday. He drops me off near school and I walk the rest of the way. When I got to school there was a lot of whispers.

Who is she?

Is she new?

She's so pretty

Dammnnn she's hot

she's gorgeous

It was weird hearing all these nice comments. I just thought that they would suddenly stop and laugh at me. They'd laugh at how pathetic I am, believing that I was actually pretty.

I arrived at my locker and saw Jess waiting for me as usual. Her eyes lit up and she grinned widely.

"You're back..." She whispers

"What do you mean?" I ask

"I didn't think it was true but I was right. You're becoming your old self again. The happy and carefree Alexa." She says

She was right. I was slowly becoming my old self. The Alexa when she was younger. The Alexa in the 7th grade who didn't care about what others thought. The one who was happy even with all the shitty struggles. The one who saw positivy in everything.

I may not be positive about everything, nor am I happy with my shittyy struggles. But I am happy again. I'm happy because I found someone who truly cares and understands me...

Or I'm just happy cause of the medicine.

The click clacking of heels brought me back to reality. Stood in front of me was Cole and his friends. Cole had his arm around Ariana's waist. Ariana stood there in a pretty pink dress. The dress hugged her bust tightly, then flowed out. She wore pink high heels and her blonde hair was curled.

There goes my happy mood.

"Hi!! Are you new here?" She asks

"No."

"Oh? So why havent I seen you before?"

"Because you're always looking at yourself in the mirror" Jess mumbles beside me. I chuckle and punch her in the arm. She shrugs and mouths "it's true"

"Ariana, it's me. Alexa Brians." I say a bit too loudly. Her jaw drops and everyone who heard me starts whispering to each other

Wait it's the pig?!

No way

How much money did the surgery cost

How'd she get so pretty?

There's no way that's her

My mood deflated and I see Jess clenching her fist. I put my hand on her shoulder and shake my head but she just glares at me.

"LISTEN UP YOU LITTLE SHITS. THIS IS MY BEST FRIEND ALEXA BRIANS. SHE IS GORGEOUS,AMAZING,TALENTED, KIND AND DEFINITELY NOT ANYTHING YOU SAY. SHE IS NOT FAT, NOT UGLY, NOT A WHORE AND NOT AN ATTETION SEEKER" Jess yells at these people

"JESS SHUT UP" I yell at her. All eyes are on me and Jess is shocked at my outburst.

"Leave it. These people are just low lives who have nothing better to do with their lives other than gossip and bully. They're not worth yelling at because our voices are precious and we shouldn't be wasting it on these turds." I say

I seemed confident on the outside, but on the inside I was shaking with fear. I knew this was a bad idea. Now they'll think of me as some bitch who thinks she's so great. They'll think I'm just a try hard. They'll think I'm so mighty and brave, so soon they'll show me wrong. I was trembling as I thought of what these people thought about me

"You're totally right Alex. These assholes aren't worth it." Jess says. She shoves the people out of her way, causing some to fall over

"Not so fun now is it?" I smirk at this one girl. She used to bully me too. Calling me names and shit. She had a scowl on her face and I rolled my eyes at her. I extended a hand to her and her eyes widen in shock. She's frozen to the floor and I sigh

"Are you gonna take it or no? Cause I can't wait for you forever." I snap

She blinks and takes my hand cautiously. I pull her up, give her a small smile and then walked away.

Why'd I do that?

No matter who it is, even if they are your enemy, someone who hurt you or someone who caused you sadness, always show kindness.

I'm not a bitch like them.

You don't fix your problems with a bitch by being another bitch.

Even though I was scared of the result of the events of today, I was proud. I was proud that I stood up for myself for once.

Stand up. Don't let anyone push you down.

///////////////////////////////////