It took a whole minute before Kelsey responded and she only did when she was sure that what she had heard was indeed correct.

"By him you mean.." Kelsey said just to confirm.

"Remus," Astrid looked at her wide-eyed, mortification seeping from every pore.

It took some effort to not double over in laughter. Astrid's pained look did the trick. The blonde continued to eye the suitcase that Kelsey had snatched away.

"And your response is to pack your bags and leave?!" Kelsey exclaimed.

"Says the girl who was ready to drown herself in the Black Lake two months ago!" Astrid shrieked hysterically.

The two girls were silent for a moment before Astrid lunged for her trunk on Kelsey's bed to which Kelsey responded by physically trying to stop her.

"I am going to leave this school, move to Bulgaria, and live as a nun," Astrid proclaimed, reaching for the trunk just as Kelsey body-slammed into her, pinning her down.

"No you're not," Kelsey went to grab her friend's hands.

"It's only befitting given the sinful ways of how I conduct myself in my friendship with him. I'm a harlot!"

"Yeah?" Kelsey breathed. "Well, join the club! Kinky Kelpie and Friends. You can be my new vice-president." She went to swat Astrid's hand away from the trunk by hitting her arms.

They continued their squabble until Astrid somehow managed to knock Kelsey off of her by slamming her head back and hitting her friend in the nose.

Kelsey fell back with an Ouch! to which Astrid panicked and shuffled over to check her injury.

"Kels! Oh my, Helga! I'm so sorry!!" Astrid started fussing over her when -

"WHAT IN THE-?!" Doreen, one of their dorm-mates yelled as she entered the room only to see Kelsey lying on her bed, clutching her nose with Astrid hovering over her with both their uniforms ruffled and both extremely red in the face.

Astrid squeaked.

"Ishh noff whaff it looffs lyfe," Kelsey sent a sheepish smile, her voice muffled as she tried to ignore the pain.

Ϟ

"Uh Moony.." Sirius began, sounding unsure as he stared at what he couldn't believe on the Marauders Map. But his friend didn't respond. He had been really distracted since the moment he had gotten back to the dorms that evening.

"Moony," Sirius now poked him.

"What, Padfoot?" he snapped.

"Am I going barmy or are Astrid and Kelpie's footprints really awfully close on the map?" Sirius said.

"What?!" Remus snatched the map from his hand only to stare at the two sets of footprints that seemed to be overlapping in one of the Hufflepuff dorms.

Remus gulped as his mind wandered to an hour earlier. A blush immediately crept on his face and he shut the map close in a hurry, banishing any untoward thoughts about Astrid.

Ϟ

"So let me get this straight.." Kelsey began.

One quick Episkey to the nose later, Astrid and Kelsey now sat on their respective beds while Kelsey tried to understand the whole hullabaloo about this predicament.

"You guys were walking back to the dorms."

Astrid nodded solemnly.

"And the scene kinda went like this.."

"You didn't have to carry that, you know," Astrid took the extra books from Remus' hands as he held them out. He had been kind enough to walk her back to her dorms after their study session with Marlene. "I'm the one who decided to check out all these books."

"After I told you about them," Remus sent Astrid a sheepish smile to which she turned her face away to hide her blush.

Yes, it had been a few months and it seems that what started off as an innocent crush was now a heart-thumper every time she was near him.

"Such a gentleman," she grinned back. "Kelsey's right. You four are a weird bunch."

Remus chuckled, "Don't get me started. You'd hardly be surprised at the types of things I've had to bail them out of in the last seven years."

Astrid shuffled her feet nervously. He hadn't left yet. Was he dawdling on purpose? Then again, he didn't even have to offer to walk her back. Was this just Remus being nice or..

"You won't believe this one time Padfoot got caught by Filch.." Astrid focused on him again as he recounted the time he had to help Sirius and a girl he had been locked in a closet with after-hours, escape the caretaker in fifth-year.

"The scandal," she giggled, imagining it in her head.

"Scandal indeed. He does have his way with the ladies." He ruffled the back of his head with a shy smile. She couldn't believe that he didn't have more girls pining after him. Her eyes traced his sharp jawline and rugged features. His calm demeanour only added to his personality.

She never realised when she had become a goner. But sharing knowing looks with him over Sirius and Kelsey over the years had given them this inexplicable bond.

"I don't get it," she blurted out and Remus looked at her confused. "I'd think you'd have girls after you too."

Kelsey's voice beckoned her. 12 Ways to Woo a Marauding Werewolf - Step 7: Coy flirting and sultry vibes.

'Be bold!' Kelsey's voice in her head told her.

"What?" His hand stilled.

"I mean..isn't there someone you'd like.." Astrid lowered her voice as best as she could and leaned in closer. "..someone to call you Daddy in bed?"

She saw Remus freeze in shock, the moment she knew she had messed it up bad. He gulped, his Adam's apple bobbing as he searched for an appropriate response.

It was a trick question, Astrid realised. There wasn't any appropriate response to her unholy insinuation.

Petrified on the spot, she turned around without bothering to wait for his reply and rushed into the common room, squeaking out the password. She was never leaving.

"Why Tatty, why?!" Kelsey slammed her head on her pillow in disbelief. The second-hand embarrassment was too much.

"I don't know. I was trying to flirt," Astrid said meekly.

"You cannot proceed to Part 7 of '12 Ways to Woo a Marauding Werewolf' without doing steps 1-6!" Kelsey scolded her.

"Well, I know that now," Astrid huffed before dropping her face to her hands again. "How am I ever going to face him again?"

"Maybe we should head over to the grounds instead," Kelsey said.

"Why?" Astrid furrowed her eyebrows.

"So we can find a hole for you to crawl into and die in," Kelsey giggled finally, to which Astrid finally smiled.

"Shut up," she said. "Need I remind you that just two months ago-"

"- I was about to drown myself in the Black Lake, yes you said that already." Kelsey finished before frowning.

Maybe it was time she came clean?

"It was partly your fault you know?!" Astrid cried. "I was thinking about our fight and your whole handcuff situation and really Kelsey? That's a bit kinky to be testing in public school spaces isn't it?"

It was Kelsey's turn to groan. "About that," she gulped. If Astrid hadn't murdered her before, she was about to.

"Although I guess it's better to do that in an empty classroom than the dorms we share." Astrid tapped her chin in thought.

"It was Sirius who 'cuffed me."

Astrid huffed. "Don't be like that. You can't expect me to believe that he is responsible for everything wrong in your life. How did he even get that close to you?"

Kelsey took a deep breath: "Werekindasortanotreallyseeingeachother."

"Come again?" Astrid gaped at her.

"We're kinda sorta not really seeing each other."

"You minx!" Astrid grabbed a pillow and threw it at Kelsey who dodged.

"Well, not that it matters anymore," she turned somber.

"What do you mean?" Astrid asked. Kelsey launched into an explanation of all that was currently going wrong in the last two days including what she overheard today and Sirius' sketchy behaviour.

"It's just them being petty and making up false things," Astrid assured her about the Gryffindor girls. Cathy had a skill for blowing things out of proportion.

Kelsey shook her head. "Doesn't matter. We've more important things to do. Such as wooing that Marauder."

Kelsey had decided that she had dwelled on her own problems enough. To a point of fault that she had started ignoring Astrid and her other girlfriends' issues. Some friend she was. She was going to set it right if it was the last thing she did.

"Can we come up with a better name for that?" Astrid groaned.

"Nope," Kelsey chuckled. "It's what I'm going to title your romance novel when I write it Tatty." At this Astrid finally laughed.

"Reckon I can get the Muggle relations department to make a Mills and Boon-esque series targeted at Witches?"

Astrid, who remembered the scandalising novels Kelsey had shown her last year, rolled her eyes. "Only you Kels, only you."

But Kelsey wasn't listening. The gears in her head were already turning at how she'd get Remus to talk to Astrid again. Willingly. Without running away. She had a feeling that Remus did like her back but was too chicken to do anything.

There was only one way to confirm it. She dreaded the realisation: She needed to include one of the remaining three boys in the plan.

Ϟ

"Walker, I know I'm irresistible but I should warn ya, I don't see you that way if that's what your intentions for getting me in this closet are," the cocky voice of one Sirius Black was heard. "Not to mention Moony'd eat me next full moon," a softer mumble was then heard.

He opened the cupboard nevertheless to be met with Kelsey's burning gaze as his smile dropped at his own joke. Astrid gave Kelsey a warning look from behind him.

"Come to think of it, I think I have somewhere to be," he made up a hasty excuse and was about to leave when Kelsey grabbed him by the robes and pulled him into the cupboard with Astrid entering behind him.

This was unfortunately the only way to drag Sirius away since he was still avoiding her.

"Look, Black.." Kelsey wasn't having it today. Sirius winced at the use of his surname, his heart dropping a little as the girl of his affections cold-shouldered him. "..can we forget the fact that 'you're not ignoring me but ignoring me' and try to help Astrid here?"

Sirius scoffed. "Why would I do that?" He crossed his arms.

"Because if you don't, getting painful boners in class will be the last of your problems," she threatened, making Astrid giggle. Sirius looked at Astrid and then back at Kelsey who shrugged. Kelsey had filled her friend in on the details of their illicit meetings after making her promise that she couldn't breathe a word of it to anyone.

"I still can't believe it. You two," Astrid said in awe, making Sirius smirk as he went to wink at Kelsey before remembering that he was supposed to be staying away temporarily.

"Moving on," Kelsey prodded. "Black, we'll need your help. Since Potter and Pettigrew are out of the question."

"Fine. But only because I want in on why Moony has been acting weird." Sirius decided. "It has to do with him, doesn't it? He's been acting funny for a few nights."

Astrid appeared wary but Kelsey nudged her with a silent look.

"Fine. Here's what happened.." Astrid began.

Ϟ

"Do you think he'll say yes?" Sirius whispered in Kelsey's ear at the Hufflepuff table a day before the Valentine's Hogsmeade trip. Kesley felt goosebumps from his closeness. They were still in the middle of their non-fight fight.

"He better, or I'll hex him to the next full moon," she said.

They both stared at Astrid who shyly approached Remus at the Gryffindor table. She sent Kelsey a panicked glance but Kelsey gave her the 'Get over yourself and do it' look while Sirius thumbs up-ed her for encouragement. Astrid took a shaky breath and sat down next to him.

"You're staring," Sirius pointed out, as she watched them get into a conversation. Their two friends were turning all sorts of red as Astrid now went to profusely apologizing with hand gestures and all, accidentally knocking over pumpkin juice on Remus.

"Kelsey," he said. "They'll be fine."

"Are you seeing what I'm seeing?" Her eyes were still glued to the trainwreck

Sirius rolled his eyes and grabbed her chin and forced her to look at him.

"Kelsey," he said once, his gaze dropping to her lips.

Kelsey's heart hammered and her gaze flicked to around them as if to see if anyone had looked their way.

Sensing her unease, he let go putting some distance between them.

"I'm sorr-" he was cut-off by Astrid suddenly coming back to pick up her things.

"What'd he say? What happened?" Kesley hissed excitedly.

Astrid continued blushing. "A lady doesn't kiss and tell."

"What? YOU KISSED?! When?" Kelsey leaned a little to see Remus getting up at the Gryffindor table. "Sirius this is all your fault!" She smacked him in the arm.

"Bugger, Jones. It's a figure of speech" Sirius rubbed his arm.

"Kelsey shush! I'll tell you later. For now, peace out!" Astrid left to join Remus who was waiting for her.

"Traitor!" Kelsey called out as Astrid walked out of the hall. "I raised you! I taught you my 70s slang!"

But Astrid didn't bother looking back.

Chuckling to herself, she went to leave also, not wanting to be near Sirius given his lack of enthusiasm, no matter how much she wanted to stick around.

But he stopped her. "Listen. Can we talk-"

"Jones," Potter cut in.

Sirius groaned in frustration letting her hand drop. Would someone give him a break? He was trying to do the right thing and apologise for being a tit.

"What?" she snapped although she was internally thankful for his interruption.

"Can we talk?" Potter asked nervously. He kept fidgeting with the hem of his robes.

"Now?"

"Yes?"

Kelsey huffed as if she had important things to do at which James resisted the urge to roll his eyes.

"I need your help-" Kelsey snorted, making him click his tongue in annoyance. "- I want to ask Lily out on a Valentine's Day date. You know muggle style," he said.

"Aren't you guys like already a thing," Kelsey was getting annoyed. Here she had friends getting ready to ask each other out for Valentine's Day when her own plans and relationship status was undecided. She sent a furtive glance at Sirius who was still next to her and banished such thoughts.

"Please Jones, I really want to make this perfect for her," he looked desperate and Kelsey gave in.

"In case you forgot we're not talking right now."

Instead, Potter gave her his best pout to which Kelsey found herself smiling. Sirius let out another frustrated noise, at being ignored.

"I guess I could find a way to include you too."

"Wicked!" Potter and Sirius high-fived each other.

Ϟ