Excuse all mistakes!!!

Yesterday was not my day at all. It was like everyone was starting with me and I ain't like that. I be trying not to fight but it's hard not to fight when I been doing it all my life. I need to go to anger management cause I'm scared that when I start working with people I'm going to get mad at them and do something out of character.

I used to have to fight my uncles they would try to do evil things to my grandma and they kept trying to touch my cousins. They never touched me cause I was always the one to fight back. It was so bad back then I stabbed two of my uncles when I was 6 years old because they tried to kill my grandma by putting a pillow over her face so she couldn't breath. I was glad I caught it in time to stop them.

I grew up so angry at people and one of the reasons behind my anger was my dad. I used to act up in middle and elementary school to get attention from my dad. He ain't care about me at all and only cared for his girlfriend and her kids who wasn't even his kids.

I got so mad at my dad for being so stupid and not caring about me. I thought he was stupid because he stayed with his girlfriend, her dad, her kids, and the kids father. His girlfriend would always accuse him of cheating when he would only go to work and come straight home. My dad was stupid is so stupid to not see the signs of her cheating with her baby daddy who still stayed with her.

I was angry because he was a weak man. He let his girlfriend beat on him and kick him out. I would never forget how him and his girlfriend got into a argument and she made him sleep outside with me inside the house with her kids who bullied me all the time.

👆🏾😭

I had so much pint up anger from my childhood I took it out an others. When I'm angry I don't know how to do nothing but fight and yell.

When I was a child I was diagnosed with Disruptive mood dysregulation disorder and even though my doctors said it wouldn't grow into my adulthood my mom still make jokes and tell me I probably still have it.

I sat in my car outside of my house listening to Kodak Black- Closure. This was my favorite song by Kodak Black and I could listen to it everyday.

Sitting in my car smoking and listening to music was one of my favorite things to do.

" When you chillin that's when they play with you the most but they don't know you really ten times worse keep your niggas out they feelings when they're jokes you can't have your nigga in prison feeling hurt cause when you chillin that's when they play with you the most" I sung along with the song.

I saw the text my mom sent me and ignored it. She was asking me if Karon and Marquez could stay with me for a week until they get a new house and she had me fucked up. I hope she don't expect me to let them stay in my house after they disrespected me.

I blew out the smoke after I inhaled it. I jumped when I heard shots go off. I let my seat all the way back to the point where I was basically in a laying down position. I'm trying to smoke and if they want to be stupid and shoot then that's that them.

Everybody else could run and leave but me on the other hand I'm gon sit right here and smoke this blunt.

" Oh hell Naww this bitch betta get the fuck off my car fo I be the one bussing bullets in this bitch" I said once I saw someone lean on my car while shooting in the opposite direction.

" GET THE FUCK OFF MY CAR" I yelled loud enough for him to hear me. Once the person turned I mugged. Why am I always running into these two. You couldn't tell it was them cause they had on ski mask on and it was getting dark outside but I could tell by they tattoo I see on they hands. They both had matching tattoos that said " Keisha" with Roman numeral underneath it.

They ran somewhere else after turning around to see me in the car. I hope they black asses get shot right in the balls.

Once I heard the shots getting further away I put my seat back up. " Ouu I hope that's Karon and MarQuez getting chased by the fucking police" I watched the police chase the dudes dressed in all black in front of my car.

I rolled down the window. " Bite they ass" I yelled to the K-9 dogs that was running after them also. I rolled my window back up laughing.

" I need some friends" I said with a frown before laughing. " Naww fuck some friends I got my friend Casper the ghost" I mumbled to myself.

I truly didn't need friends if all I see people talking about is them getting snaked by they own friends. I would rather be lonely than having people me around me that would snake me.

I jumped when I saw something fly past my eyes. " Oh hell Naww I'm tripping" I shook my head before turning off my car and grabbing my stuff and going into the house.

Once it was morning time I woke up and started cooking . I'm glad it was the weekend cause I don't got to go to school.

I was listening to while I cooked Breakfast. My little cousins were coming over so I decided to make a big breakfast.

" I still remember to the day, In fact it was a 3rd Monday, You came along to be the one for me,And now I'm alone" I sung my head out to the Janet Jackson song.

There was a knock at my door. I expected it to be my cousins so I had on nothing but tight shorts that were tight on me and a white tank top.

I opened up the door without looking and mugged once I saw who it was. I tried to slam the door in they face but James caught it.

He looked at me in disgust before speaking. " That's rude ya mother and the rest of us came over to talk and your disrespectful ass gon slam the door on us"

They pushed me out the way and walked in. I closed my eyes counting down from 10 to 1. I bounced my leg standing in the same spot.

I slammed my door. I didn't say anything I just breathed. I went to the door that was being knocked on and opened it. This time it was my little cousins.

They smiled at me but then frowned. " You look mad" I nodded my head. "Come in" They stepped inside cautiously and I shut the door behind them.

" I cooked for y'all" They smiled going straight to the kitchen. I went into the kitchen seeing James and my mom eating my food while my cousins fixed they plate and Karon and MarQuez sat at the table on they phone.

I closed my eyes and clinched my jaw. I calmly sat there and watched as my cousins sat down and started eating. I was getting even more mad that they just invited themselves in here and started eating the food I cooked.

" Ouu Day day finna spaz he too quiet and that's not good." My little cousion Jayla said.

MarQuez stood up. " Bitch you said when you catch me you was gon pop me so what's up" I chuckled.

" Day Day I personally wouldn't let him talk to me like that but ay that's just me " Jayden said looking between us two. He was always trying to instigate stuff.

" I gotta hundred on Day" Namya my 13 year old cousin said.

" Bitch Imma sholl pop you lemme handle some shit first and how bout you let that jaw heal befo you get into another fight" I cracked my kneck. He had some nerve coming in my house and starting stuff with me. I was not even worried about him right now.

" Naww come pop me now" He pointed to himself.

" Drag him"All 4 of my cousins said looking at me and then sipping on some juice. They are so messy but I love them for that.

"No need to fight" My mom tried to intervene but was too late cause I already was walking to where MarQuez was.

He punched me and I dodged the punch. We started fighting after I slapped him. I don't even know why he started with me cause the only thing this is going to lead to was him getting beat up like last time.

Hopefully this time I don't get jumped. I used all my strength to pick MarQuez up and body slam him on my tile floor. Body slamming was always my specialty.

" BEAT HIS ASS" Jayden yelled standing on my chair and recording the fight with his phone.

" OUU SHIT HE GOT EM BY THE HAIR" Jayla yelled covering her mouth with her balled up fist.

" I know Y'all heard that crack Day'Vyon fucking him up" One of my other cousins Kamya said.

" Stop with all this" Both James and my mom yelled. Marquez choked me as I was on top of him throwing mutiple punches.

" Getcho ass up you getting beat up by a punk" Karon yelled at MarQuez. I know now was not the time to be thinking this but MarQuez looked fine with a busted lip and black eye.

As I was still beating him He pressed two fingers on my neck. After a few seconds I passed out.