I told him about my feelings and he dismissed them as a mere attraction.

How could he do that??

He doesn't even know about his relationship with his girlfriend. How can he know about my feelings??

I looked around for my sketchbook and the pictures of my parents but could not find them.

Oh, I must have forgotten them in the kitchen when I prepared milk and hot chocolate.

They must be in the kitchen or dining table, must go and get them. I rushed downstairs and saw them lying on the dining table. I picked them up and started going upstairs but was feeling very sad so I sat down on the couch where he was sitting earlier with him. I was feeling good that he was teaching me.

I already knew that chapter by heart but I wanted him to sit by me and talk to me but he said that he was missing his girlfriend and went away.

I felt bad that he preferred her over me. But of course, she was already in his life when he met me. But he was all I had.

My tears were still flowing again. I opened my sketchbook and started making some designs with tears still flowing from my eyes.

Manik's POV

I went to my room with a heavy heart. The guilt of hurting her was killing me. I switched off all lights and tried to sleep. But everything she said was haunting me.

I need to talk to Chachi, I will tell her to come here and make her understand that all this is not possible.

The clock struck Eleven and I could not disturb her right now. So tried sleeping again but how could I sleep, when Roshni was so hurt, because of me?

I thought of watching a movie but the sounds would have disturbed her if I watched the movie in my room.

So thought of going to the home theatre as that room was soundproof. I got up and went downstairs.

The lights were on in the informal sitting area which was unusual. So I went to switch off it and was shocked to see Roshni there. She was sleeping on the couch with a Sketchbook in her hand.

What was she doing here??

Oh, God! Did she sleepwalk here again??

I went closer to her and saw her tear-streaked face and even her Kajal had smeared a bit.

I sat beside her and took the sketchbook from her hand and opened it. A few photographs fell out of it. I kept the sketchbook on the table and picked them up and saw the pictures of a man and woman, they must be her parents as Roshni resembled the woman in the photograph.

I saw that something was written on the back. So, I turned to see it and a line was written there...

' Mom and dad, I miss you. Why did you leave me alone?? I wish they had killed me with you. I have no one to love me.'

A few tear drops stains were there on the photographs.

Killed?? Her parents got killed? Why ?? Who did that??

She has been through much more than I had thought, really felt very bad for her.

So that's why she is so emotional... But why would someone kill her parents??

I needed to know more about it. Maybe Munim Ji can tell me something about it.

" Roshni?? " I said in a low volume. She already had a sleeping disorder, I didn't want to disturb her.

So I tried to pick her up but she pushed me and curled herself in a foetus position in her sleep.

I could not let her sleep on the couch in such an uncomfortable position. So I went even closer to her and tried again. She struggled and tried to open her eyes but couldn't.

" Mom? Dad? Are you here? I missed you. " She said. I felt like crying to see her pain. The very next moment she wrapped her arms around my neck and placed her head in the crook of my neck. Her warm breath was burning my skin.

I took her in my arms, could feel her soft body pressed against my hard chest and felt ashamed of the fact that I noticed such a thing while she was crying like that.

She was like a child who was probably hugging me thinking that I was her mom or dad.

" Why did both of you leave me alone?? No one loves me... No one wants to be with me... Not even Manik Ji... Am I so bad? Tell me!! Why did you leave me alone, dad? " She said and cried.

" It's Manik, Roshni. Shh... Don't cry, just sleep." I said. She sobbed.

" Manik Ji??..... Do you really love her?? Why? Why did you have to love her?? " She mumbled.

Oh, God!!

" Why couldn't you wait for me to come into your life? Why? " She said with her nose and lips brushing my throat.

I closed my eyes for a few seconds, picked her up and started walking toward the stairs. I held her tightly while climbing the stairs. She also tightened her arms around my neck.

" Manik Ji, I love you..." She said and cried making me feel so helpless.

I wanted Myra in my life as I liked her for a few years now, but was not in love with her. But at the same time, I didn't feel any such thing for Roshni as well.

And I should not feel anything like that for Roshni, It was not right. Not acceptable by society, she is my ward, my responsibility.

Once I reached her room, pushed open the door and took her inside tried to make her sleep on the bed but she held me tightly.

" Roshni, please leave me!!" I said but she tightened her arms around me.

" Roshni, please... " I said but she shook her head.

I could not remain like this, so had to sit down on the bed, along with her on my lap, to get her arms loosened around me.

I was still pulling her arms apart to get out of them when she placed her lips on mine.

Oh... My...God!!

I was so shocked that I forgot to move. Her soft, plump lips were pressed against my mine. She kissed me hesitantly and I shook as a current passed through me. I had never felt like that. It was the first time, someone kissed me.

I kept sitting there with her in my lap. None of us was moving we both were sitting like statues. But then I came back to my senses. My nerve endings had started vibrating.

I wanted to kiss her back as her innocent kiss must have cast a spell on me.

It was such a weird feeling. I was feeling excessive heat running through my body which was making me very uncomfortable.

I broke the kiss with a great effort and looked at her pretty face which was almost damp with her tears.

She was still sleeping. I wiped her eyes and cheeks with my thumbs and before I could stop myself, I pecked the corner of her mouth.

She tightened her arms around me and I came back to my senses.

Oh, no!! Shit!! How could I do that??

I was desperate to get away from her.

Finally, I managed to get out of her arms and moved away as fast as I could.

Out of impact she also fell back on the bed.

She woke up and looked around. I could see that she was shocked to see me there.

" Manik Ji? What happened?? " She asked.

" N..nothing!! Good night! "

I said and rushed out of her room.

" What are you doing here?? You want to talk to me?? " she asked.

" You were sleeping on the couch in an uncomfortable position. Your body would have become stiff and you would have felt pain in the morning. So I brought you here." I said.

" Thanks, you should not have bothered. I can take care of myself. Please don't bother next time. " She said.

The moment I entered my room, I shut the door and rushed to the washroom and splashed water on my face and when I still felt that my face was burning, I took the hand shower faucet and turned it on over my head while I was bending over the washbasin. The water was cooling off my mind.

I came back to my room and tried my level to sleep.

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