I wake up slowly and painfully with a smile on my face.

I sit up as much as I can and see that I am in a dark room with no windows or light turned on.

Because of my incredible eyesight and the light coming through the cracks around the door, I am able to see the room pretty clearly.

I am chained up. My wrists and ankles are cuffed by chains attached to the four walls.

Surprisingly, I don't feel pain from hitting the ground, just from whatever was injected into me. My whole neck feels on fire and my whole body aches. I feel weak and tired, but the pain just makes me grin and grin.

There is no furniture in the room, unless you count the dirt, grime, and bloodstains that adorn all the walls, the floor, and even the ceiling in a few spots.

The floor feels slightly damp and I don't want to know why.

The room is cold and smells of human waste, body odor, and, most strongly, blood.

I don't know if I should be scared or ask if I can join my kidnappers.

"Scared, Sang! You should be scared!" An exasperated Sarah cries.

Star scoffs, "As if. We would rather die than be caught acting like a wimp. Join your kidnappers. This way, you could have fun being in pain and helping others feel pain."

I ponder, "But what if they don't like the pain?"

Star screams, "No pain! Pain is bad! Gosh, your like a child!"

I roll my eyes.

"That's because I am a child. Duh. We have a week and a half until my birthday on October sixth. Then I'll be an adult technically. Well, we'll all be adults then."

"This isn't important! What's important is that we escape and get to the boys!" Sarah exclaims.

She's just upset that I'm smarter.

But that's okay, we can't all be geniuses because then we would all be average.

Star smirks, "I will only agree if we get to kill our kidnappers."

"But what if this is just a test for the mafia? We were supposed to receive our mark today, after all," I think aloud. Well, out loud to the voices in my head without using my voice.

And I sound like a nutcase again...

I sigh and shake my head before smiling again.

They meant to weaken me and hurt me, but the pain makes me happy and sharpens my senses making me stronger.

I laugh hysterically at the idiots who thought this was the way to torture me.

Don't they know what Mother did to me?

What Father did to me?

What Marie did to me?

I continue with my laughter.

This is nothing!

That's when the door is unlocked and opened.

"****, why is she laughing? ******, the ***** was supposed to be at least a little scared, if not crying!" A gravelly voice whines, sounding slightly scared.

Poor guy is scared by my laughter...

I got caught by a bunch of wimps!

And clearly not the Academy ones.

I laugh harder.

Now, there are tears running down my face. I guess he got the tears he wanted!

Suddenly, my head is whipped to the side and pain radiates from my cheek out to my whole face.

The buttface just slapped me while I am chained up! How is that a fair fight?! He isn't Mother, so it isn't okay!

I feel icy fury running through me.

I turn to the wiry man who reeks of cigarettes in front of me and give him my iciest and darkest glare.

He turns pale and begins to tremble.

Seeing his fear, a sick grin fixes itself to my face.

He stumbled back and runs from the room, leaving the door wide open.

Wimpy, idiot of a bum.

Star takes it over to snap the chains holding us down now that there is a way out.

Grunting with effort, we try our hardest, all three of us.

We pull, we yank, we tear at the chains, but we are unable to free ourselves.

These are not normal chains.

We've snapped chains before. Mother likes to chain is up, but this chain is not breaking.

What is different about this chain?

"Sang, maybe it is a different metal?" Sarah guesses.

Star screams, "We can break it! Don't give up!"

"No, save your energy for when you are out of the chains," Sarah insists.

I give an annoyed shout of anger and frustration, before giving up. I relax and lay down.

"When we get free, we better kill them," A sulking Star mutters.

I nod in agreement.

I hate the way this room is.

It is just like the shed behind our house, except this room has a little light and less waste and blood.

However, this room is worse because I am not with family.

I have no choice except to be here.

This lack of freedom, this lack of choices, this lack of life only angers me further.

I hate that we are too weak to free ourselves.

***

A few hours later, after my voice as long stopped reaching above an inside voice, a man walks in.

My father.

"Father? Have you come to play with me?" I ask confused.

Father looks at me with a blank face.

"Sang, it has been far too long since your last injection. What are your thoughts toward me?"

I furrow my brow.

"What do you mean? I love you, but I kinda sorta hate you too. Does this make sense?"

Father gives me a wry smile.

"Believe me, child," He says solemnly, "It makes a lot more sense than you know. For now, you must be taught a lesson. You need to be out into your place. That ****, Greg, might not have been strong enough, but others will be stronger than you. You need to learn submission and humility. You need a beating to learn."

I smile at Father, my anger from earlier fading

"We can play together, Father. I just need some sense knocked into me, huh?"

He makes sense.

There will always be people stronger than me.

I ought to learn defeat now instead of later.

He steps out of the room, and sadness fills me. Father isn't going to be the person to play with me?

A third man steps in with greasy, dirty blond hair and large muscles and a wiry beard. In his hands is a leather belt.

Good.

It won't cut me or break the skin, unless the buckle hits me. It will just bruise and leave welts.

Then the belt swings and comes crashing down on my back.

***

Today is my birthday!

I eat a piece of my shoe when the pain in my stomach grows.

I am now eighteen years old.

Huh.

I feel exactly the time as I did yesterday.

What a let down.

I wonder if the boys are looking for me.

Do I even want to be found?

Sure, I don't ever leave the room, but my chains are looser.

Sure, I am beaten, but it is all in good fun.

Sure I am starved, but I get to see Father.

Sure the bearings are every day and I can't move without having pain race through me, but the pain is fun and makes me smile.

He comes in every other day for my shot and talks to me sometimes while he is injecting me.

I have had a lot of time to myself.

And by myself, I mean with Sarah and Star.

It is just like it was with Mother and Marie.

We talk about the strangest of things.

We speak of everything and nothing.

I even wrote a poem.

"I am upright

But now

The shouting shame

Din

I live

I got up

But

I fell down

My life is upside down

I thought

There was just a setback

Fear

You took

My hope?"

Kinda strange and definitely not professional, I know.

Sarah helped me write it and think of a title.

We call it "An Upside Down Life."

I think it is quite clever. Not everyone would get the twist to it, but I do. Maybe that's just because I am a genius...

Oh my Monsters.

Ugh.

I have way too much time on my hands.

At least with Mother I often had a book.

I am eternally grateful for Sarah and Star.

Without them, I would have lost my mind and sanity a long time ago.

No, I am not insane.

We are Insane.

We will free ourselves so we can be with the boys again.

Nothing can stop us.