A few days later. At Alexandria.

I saw Lydia hiding at the clothing drying area and walked over to her. She was sitting on the ground, digging up worms.

Negan walked to her "You looking for a job, kid? "

yeah he's kinda welcomed in our community but also not. It's complicated.

Lydia "Just trying to clear my head. "

Negan "It's your third visit in a week. You keep it up, you're gonna find some socks with your name on 'em."

Lydia " Gage and his friends started again today."

Negan " Again? "

Lydia nodded.

Negan sighed "Alright, kid, look, obviously you're having a day, but, you know, what happened to rolling with it? "

Lydia shook her head "I'm not just gonna smile and take it. "

Negan "I didn't say that. But I also didn't say run and hide. I mean, shit. "

Lydia "You said to kill 'em with kindness. "

Negan kneeled down to her "I did say that. Look, they are trying to get a reaction out of you. They wanna see you upset. Don't give that to 'em. Screw 'em."

Daryl showed up " Let's go."

Lydia " I'm good. "

Daryl snapped "Now!"

Lydia walked away.

Negan " She is just trying to fit in. "

Daryl nodded, pissed off "Yeah. Well, that ain't ever gonna happen if she hangs out with you, now, is it?"

Then he grabbed my arm "and you're coming with me"

he dragged me away with him.

We walked behind Lydia.

Lydia "We were just talking. "

Darryl "He ain't your friend."

Lydia " He gets me. "

Daryl "Just stay away from him, alright? "

I grimaced "Daryl, you're hurting me"

He let go of me.

I asked irritated "the hell is wrong with you?"

Then my jaw dropped when is saw what was painted on the door

"

--

I walked behind the house. Lydia had gutted a raccoon at the eating hall. Every single one of her bullies told her she was disgusting. I thought it was a great move.

Daryl "You do wanna live here, right? "

Lydia "They deserved it. "

Daryl nodded "I know. But you can't be doing shit like that"

Lydia asked irritated " But they can just write whatever the hell they want on our door? "

Daryl "I'll talk to 'em. I'll set 'em straight. "

Lydia shook her head "No, please. I don't want you to fight my fights for me, okay? They want me to give up. I know that. But I'm not gonna, okay? - I can't. - "

Daryl nodded "I get it. Can't you just avoid 'em?"

Lydia sighed and walked away.

Daryl sighed "great"

Night.

I heard screaming and rushed to it. It was Lydia. She was on the ground. Negan was next to her.

Brandon was with me " Yo, Negan! What the hell's going on back here?"

Gage rushed over to a dead Margo " Holy shit. Margo. Margo. "

A man muttered "Should have never let 'em out. "

Rodney "You freak. "

Gage yelled " This is your fault! - It was Negan! Negan killed her! "

Lydia cried out "No, he didn't do anything wrong. No, it wasn't... He didn't do anything. "

She was on the ground.. beaten up.

Daryl "Now get him out of here! -"

Lydia pleaded " Please. No, he didn't do anything wrong! "

Daryl "I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. "

Lydia sobbed out "He didn't do anything wrong. No, please! Oh, please, no. Please."

Brandon took Negan away.

At the infirmary.

I was rubbing my hand down Lydia's back.

Daryl walked to us "I'm so sorry this happened to you."

No answer.

Daryl „Lydia. "

Lydia starred into nothing "He was so sweaty. Never liked deodorant. Said it... it made his armpits itchy. So I got used to it. Sometimes he smelled like garlic and onions. I miss him. "

Daryl "Who's that? "

Lydia "My dad. My dad would've protected me. "

Daryl sighed "Tell me what happened."

Lydia sniffed out „Negan saved my life. "

Daryl looked at me before hugging Lydia.

At Negan's cell.

I walked in and leaned against the bars.

Negan "first your boyfriend and now you. Wow. Didn't realize I was this popular today"

I rolled my eyes annoyed.

Negan was lying on his bed " How's the kid doing?"

Me " She's banged up, but she'll be alright. "

I sighed "You know, the people out there are talking about putting you down, sayin' dad ain't around to save you no more, maybe they should have done it a long time ago. "

Negan " If you came here looking for a confession... just keep walking. It was an accident. And for the record, screw her. She was a goddamn asshole beating on a kid. World's better off. "

Then he eyed me "But you already know that, don't you? You came down here to look me in the eye because you don't know what to do with me. shit, all that time you spent fantasizing about my death, all that time you actually tried to kill me, and now look at you. You're not so sure"

me " You listen to me real close. You and I ain't never been in a room before, not toe to toe. And there ain't nobody to save you right now. "

Negan "What do you want me to do, wifey? I mean, the people out there... they are out for blood. Guys like you and me... we can smell that from a mile away."

Me "Why help Lydia? You ain't no hero. "

Negan shook his head "No. No, I'm not. I'm a sucker. See, I started believing in your way of life, your moral code. Hell, you even gave me a little taste of freedom, just so you could yank it away when I actually did the right thing. You gotta admit, that is pretty messed up. And we both know I appreciate some messed-up shit. "

Me "You're gonna get your chance to tell your side. "

Negan asked amused „Who's the sucker now? "

Suddenly Daryl walked in but froze when he saw me.

Me "Daryl?"

He grabbed me and pulled me out with him.

I grimaced "you're hurting me. Let go"

He didn't listen.

I whined out "Daryl!"

He didn't listen.

I slapped his arm and he forced me to turn around .

There was this look in his face.

I froze "what's wrong?"

he scoffed.

Me "Daryl, talk to me"

Daryl clenched his jaw.

I scoffed "you haven't looked at me for weeks. You are barely talking to me. You don't give a shit about me but the second i get close to Negan you completely lose it"

Daryl "you fucking Negan?"

I froze "what?"

Daryl "you heard me. Now answer the question"

I looked down.

Daryl "Kendall. Answer me"

I didn't respond.

Daryl grabbed my chin and made me look at him.

I cracked out "i am sorry"

He dropped his hand, scoffing.

Me "it was before you came back. It happened years ago. "

Daryl raised an eyebrow.

Me "4 years ago"

He nodded, with a clenched jaw "you still fucking him?"

I shook my head, grimacing "no. God, no."

Daryl nodded.

He didn't even look at me before walking away.

I looked after him in tears.

In Negan's cell.

I opened the cell doors.

Negan asked confused "the hell you doin', wifey?"

I walked in.He stood up and i punched him across the face.

Negan held his jaw "damn, girl. You've always been good with your hand"

Me "you told Daryl"

Negan asked confused "told him what?"

Me "what happened between you and me"

Negan "the fuckery?"

I slapped him again.

Negan grabbed my wrist "okay, listen, here, wifey, i didn't tell your man shit"

Me "you're the only one who knew, Negan! You even threatened to tell him "

Negan "but i didn't, wifey"

I slapped him again "stop calling me that"

Negan "stop punching me!"

Me "Dad should have let you bleed to death when he slit open your throat "

Then i walked away.

Night. In the council hall.

In the back room.I was talking to Michonne per radio.

Me "Everything alright? I've been tryin' to reach you. "

Michonne "Rough day, but things are looking up. What's going on? "

Me "Something happened. Gage, Margo and the rest of the gang beat up Lydia. Negan saved her . As much as I hate him, he's on the right side this time. I don't know if it's gonna make any difference, though."

Michonne " Should I come home? "

I shook my head "No, not if Hilltop still needs you. "

Michonne " How's Lydia? "

Me "Not good."

Michonne " Ken, you have to protect her. "

Me "Yeah, well, I'm trying. "

Michonne "No. You have to protect her for all of us. When we went to the border, we went there to de-escalate the conflict and buy time and strategic advantage. And it was working till Carol took her shot. Alpha could have killed us right there. Why didn't she? "

Me "You think she won't attack if we got Lydia? "

Michonne "Alpha wanted you to protect her. Look, Lydia's presence might not help us, but if Alpha thinks she isn't safe with us or if Lydia runs off because of all this, it'll definitely hurt us. She has to stay at Alexandria. "

I nodded "Alright. I'll make sure. "

Michonne "Let's just keep this between us for now. How's RJ? "

Me "He's great. He won't eat his vegetables, so I'm a little afraid for him. "

She chuckled.

Me " Hey, the council's meeting right now. "

Michonne "Ken... I want you to be my proxy when they vote. I know you'll do the right thing. "

I nodded, in tears.

Michonne "you okay? "

I shook my head in tears.

Michonne "Ken?"

I sobbed out "Michi. Am i a bad person?"

Michonne "no, god, Ken, of course not. Why would you think that? did something happened between you and Daryl?"

My voice cracked "i slept with Negan"

Michonne yelled "what!"

Me "around 4 years ago. Negan told Daryl and Daryl stormed off"

Michonne nodded "okay"

I let some tears roll down.

Michonne "you are not a bad person, Ken. The past years haven't been great to all of us. You were alone. And you let the alcohol take the best of you. Negan might have not been the best choice but ..like i said you were single, heartbroken and the alcohol took the best of you"

I nodded.

Michonne "you still there?"

I nodded "yes. Thanks. Michi.I love you"

Michonne "Love you too. Judith loves you too"

I smiled "tell her i love you too"

--

I walked into the council meeting.

Aaron " I get why people might think Negan's been redeemed. I've... I've wondered it myself. Hell, he... maybe he has changed. But a man like that, who's done the things he's done, killed the people's he's killed... something inside him is broken. We need to face that fact."

Siddiq nodded " Yes, but killing him now over this undermines the civilization that we have built."

Aaron " What about the people who never got to witness that civilization because of him?"

Siddiq asked irritated " And what the hell are you even talking about? The Whisperers are attacking us. "

Gabriel nodded " Okay, let's take a break. "

Siddiq stood up " No. Let me finish. Look at what's going on at Hilltop. We're taking our eyes off the ball. "

Gabriel "The council wasn't made for this, deciding on a man's life in the dead of night because people are carrying pitchforks and torches."

Me " I... Look, if you can't make a decision, the people out there are gonna make one for you. "

Gabriel "Well, what'd Michonne say?"

Me " She wants me to be her vote. Lydia said Negan saved her, so he saved her. I'm a "no.""

Aaron "So we're tied. Gabriel, where do you stand? "

Gabriel stood up " I'm gonna take the night to clear my head and consider my vote, and I suggest you all do the same. "