Now loading: Kids Next Door mission: Operation P.E.A.C.E.

Please

Eliminate

Annoying

Commotion

Effectively

Alastor runs through a sidewalk with her wrist communicator on.

Gabriel: Almost there, Lenore. Ready for Everything Darkness... And Vampires?

Alastor: You better believe I am, Gabe!

She runs into someone.

Alastor: Desculpe! (Sorry!) I saved up from babysitting my little siblings and keeping Amanda from destroying anything.

Gabriel: Five blocks to go. You can do it!

Alastor: I hope I get there in time. Amanda was being obnoxious as usual and led to me running late and even waking up late.

Gabriel: According to my calculations, there are still two more in stock!

Alastor: You should really consider being in the Kids Next Door, Gabe Sánchez. With your computer hacking skills, we'd have a lot less virtual enemies.

Gabriel: Eh, not really more forte. Besides, I'm suppose to be reading but instead I'm keeping track of how many eleventy billion page books are still in stock at the local book store.

Alastor: Which I appreciate very much and will be sure to make the next few Goths Society meetings but evil adult tyranny doesn't know how to rest for a day.

Gabriel: Yeah, yeah... oh, put a stake through my heart.

Alastor: Oh no, the last time you said that, your mom took you clothes shopping.

Gabriel: There's only one copy left of Everything Darkness... And Vampires!

Alastor: I'm only around the corner!

Alastor turns the corner and crashes into a woman with a briefcase, making the briefcase break and papers fly everywhere.

Woman: Watch where you're going!

Alastor: Look, I'm sorry, but I gotta get the the local book store.

Woman: No wonder you crashed into me, running around with that fake eye with the other one covered up.

She points at Alastor's blue eye and accidentally pokes it.

Alastor: OWW!

Woman: How did that hurt?

Alastor covers her eye with her hand as she moves her hair.

Alastor: Maybe because it's my real eye.

She throws the papers at the woman and runs around her to get into the bookstore.

Gabriel: Okay, slight delay but, it's still in stock, Lenore!

Alastor: Great! There it is!

A large book is on display as Alastor walks up to it.

Gabriel: Beautiful, isn't it?

Alastor: It sure is.

She grabs it and brings it to the counter.

Man: Checking out Everything Darkness... And Vampires, huh? This is very popular with youngsters.

Alastor: Mhmm! Mhmm! Mhmm!

The man scans the barcode and rings it up.

Man: Alright, that'll be 15.65, Marilyn Mannison. Cash or credit?

Alastor: Cash, and... Marilyn Mannison?

Man: Yes. Oh, that's right. You paid in advance.

A goth girl comes up to the counter.

Marilyn: Hello. Marilyn has come for her book.

Man: Ah, yes, have a good day, ma'am.

He hands Marilyn the book as she leaves, but not before blowing a raspberry at Alastor and laughing hysterically.

Alastor: Do you know when you'll get more copies of Everything Darkness... And Vampires?

Man: No, we just got a shipment this morning and we're already sold out. Soooo, we're estimating an 8 month wait?

Alastor and Gabriel: 8 month wait?!

Alastor sadly leaves the book store.

Gabriel: I'm sorry, Len. You can borrow mine after I'm done with it.

Alastor: That depends. What page are you on?

Gabriel: 15.

Alastor: Our next Goths Society meeting is tomorrow night! There's no way we'll both finish it in that lengths time.

Gabriel: But I do know someone who already has.

Alastor knocks on a door with "Crawford" above the doorbell as Mary opens it.

Mary: Hey, Lenore, what's up? Oh, did you get your copy of Everything Darkness... And Vampires?

Alastor: Sadly no. Amanda held me up twice and I kept running into people that by the time I got to the book store, only one prepaid copy remained.

Mary: Oh, I'm sorry to hear that, Len.

Alastor: Yeah. Gabe said that you already finished your copy?

Mary: Oh yeah. You know how I am with books.

Marty chuckles.

Mary: I practically breeze through them. You wanna borrow it before the next Goths Society meeting tomorrow?

Alastor: Please! I'll look stupid when you, Lizzie and Gabe discuss it and I know nothing of what you're talking about.

Mary: Alright.

She hands Alastor the book.

Mary: Better get to reading. Eleventy billion pages and only less than 48 hours.

Alastor: Yeah, thanks again, Mary.

She leaves Mary's house.

Time skip

Alastor sits on her coffin, reading her book.

Alastor: Oh sure, Elizabeth just happens to be in the observatory when the affair was going on.

Nigel comes into her room.

Nigel: There you are, Numbuh 6!

Alastor: Hmm?

Alastor looks up from her book.

Alastor: Oh, desculpe (sorry) boss, do you need me? Is there a mission?

Nigel: No. I haven't seen you all day and was wondering whether or not your were alive.

Alastor: Physically I'm fine, Numbuh 1, I've just been reading.

Nigel: Everything Darkness And Vampires?

Alastor: You forgot the pause but yeah. It's a new book about vampire romance and betrayal.

Nigel: Sounds...weird.

Alastor: It's more targeted toward goths. Every goth who's ever gothed has one.

Nigel: Is that the motto?

Alastor: No. It's the promotional slogan. Now, I'm trying to read and you know I'm alive, so can you please me alone so I can finish up? This is Mary's copy.

Nigel: Sure, but you know, we never talk anymore. Why don't we catch up?!

Alastor: I need to finish an eleventy billion page book by tomorrow and you want me to catch up with you?

Nigel: Just read while you talk.

He hops up onto her coffin with her.

Nigel: So! How are things going at home? Is Amanda still giving you trouble? Is she even more annoying and unbearable than before? I bet she's trying to teach adults to be even more of a menace towards kids...

Alastor groans.

Time skip

Alastor sits in Hoagie's cockpit with her book against her legs.

Alastor: Why mention what the love interest looks like? Maybe it's important to the story.

A loud banging sound started as Alastor covers her ears.

Alastor: Who's there?!

Hoagie: Numbuh 6? Is that you? Why are you on my room?

Alastor: I'm trying to read.

Hoagie: Shouldn't you be in your room though?

Alastor: I was. Until Numbuh 1 decided to catch up with me. He still is.

Hoagie: How, when you're right here?

Alastor climbs out of Hoagie's cockpit and shows him a live feed of Nigel talking to a chatbot of Alastor, face included with expressions on her wrist communicator.

Nigel: What about trying to use phones to spy on us?

Chatbot Alastor: Really? I never thought of that.

Nigel: Thank you, I pride myself with my intelligence.

Alastor turns off the feed.

Alastor: Can I please just stay in here to keep reading?

Hoagie: Sure! I'll just be working a little bit!

Alastor begins to start reading again as Hoagie screws in a few screws. The noise of screwing becomes louder in Alastor's ears as she groans. It gets even louder as she growls.

Alastor: Never mind!

She stomped out of Hoagie's room.

Hoagie: What did I do?!

Alastor lays on Kuki's bed and turns a page of her book.

Alastor: Oooh, Derrick was right there when she kissed Emmett. Now, he's going to comfort her. No! The sun's about to come up.

Kuki comes in her room, singing to herself.

Kuki: La, la, la, la! Oh, hey Numbuh 6! What're you doing?

Alastor: I'm trying to read. Can you please stay absolutely silent so I can?

Kuki: Sure thing! I'm just gonna have a tea party!

Alastor: Ok.

She keeps reading as Kuki skips around her room, singing to herself and grabbing toys to have a tea party with.

Kuki: La, la, la, la, la!

Kuki's singing gets louder as Alastor grits her teeth and uses her finger to keep track of her page.

Kuki: La! La! La! La! La!

Alastor gives out a frustrated scream as she angrily leaves.

Kuki: Bye Numbuh 6!

Alastor screams in frustration again. She lays on her stomach in Wally's wrestling ring and prepared to turn the page.

Wally: Hey there, Numbuh 6!

Alastor gives a frustrated groan and looks at her teammate.

Alastor: Greetings and salutations, Numbuh 4. I'm trying to read so whatever it is you are doing, please do. It. Quietly.

Wally: Of course! I'm just getting in some practice for our next mission! Whenever that is.

Alastor: Fine by me. But, I beg of you, do it quietly.

Wally: No problem!

Alastor turns the page of her book as Wally punches a tree trunk with a picture of Father on it.

Wally: That'll teach you to try and Delightfulize me and my friends! And a little of this! And some of that! How'd you like that, huh?

Alastor grit her teeth the more Wally went on.

Alastor: Numbuh 4! What happened to our quiet arrangement?

Wally: I am being quiet! I would normally be yelling loudly.

Alastor: Can't you just say things in your head?

Wally: Then my punches won't be as good.

Alastor sighs and leaves.

Wally: What's wrong with her? No matter. Try to Delightfulize my fist!

Alastor lays on Abby's couch and holds her book above her face.

Alastor: That's right. Slap Elizabeth for stealing your best friend, Xander.

Abby: Numbuh 6?

Alastor drops her book on her face and grunts.

Abby: Now what are you doing in Numbuh 5's room?

Alastor: Everyone is being noisy and annoying while I'm trying to read my book. I need to finish it before my Goths Society meeting tomorrow.

Abby: Oh, well don't let Numbuh 5 bother you. I'll just be listening to music through my headphones.

Alastor: Obrigado. (Thank you).

She continues to read as Abby sits next to her and starts slightly banging her head to the music. Abby behind to snap her fingers as Alastor narrowed her eyebrows and sighed.

Alastor: How am I not surprised?

She trudges out of Abby's room.

Time skip

Alastor sits on the couch in her house while Gail sits next to her, watching TV.

Gail: Looky, Sissy Leni!

Alastor isn't paying attention and turns a page in her book.

Alastor: Uh-huh, isso é bom, Gail (Uh-huh, that's good, Gail)

Gail: You no see!

Alastor: Gail, I'm trying to read.

Gail: Looky!

Alastor: Fine!

She looks up at a commercial of Leer Toothpaste.

Gail: You-You miss-

Gail starts crying as Alastor groans.

Alastor sits at a stool in front of a makeup vanity.

Alastor: Oooh! She bit Xander's neck! Now, he'll be a vampire. But he's a morning person. Looks like someone needs to become a night person.

Amanda comes in the room and flops on the bed.

Amanda: Aaaah! Why are you in my room, Leboring?! You have your own room!

Alastor: I'm trying to read my book, so can you not be annoying and obnoxious for once in your life and let me read.

Alastor goes back to reading as Amanda stares in the mirror of her vanity in shock.

Amanda: Annoying and obnoxious?! I'll have you know that I'm a delight to be around! How dare you insult me like that! I'm your sister! Of course, I'm allowed to beat you down but the moment you do it to me is illegal because I'm older by five whole years! Why, I'll have you know...

Alastor groans and leaves her sister's room by slamming the door.

Eunice: Amanda, don't slam doors, querido (dear).

Alastor: Fui eu, Avó (It was me, Grandma).

Eunice: Você também não faz isso, Lenore (You don't do that either, Lenore).

Alastor heaves a sigh.

Alastor: Looks like this calls for extreme measures!

She has a serious look on her face.

Time skip

Alastor rings the doorbell with her book under her arm. The Delightful Children open the door with their eyes closed and smiling.

Delightful Children: To whom do we owe the pleasure...

They open their eyes but close them halfway and drop their smiles when they see Alastor.

Delightful Children: Oh, it's just you.

Alastor: Olá (Hello) to you too. I need a quiet place to read my book.

Delightful Children: And what in your right mind thought we'd let you in our hou-

Alastor cuts them off by getting close to their faces.

Alastor: I'll have you know that I have an eleventy billion page book under my arm. If you refuse my demand, then Father will have six turtles as children.

The Delightful Children blink twice before five of them force smiles onto their faces.

Delightful Children except Ella: Do come in, Lenore! We'd be thrilled to have you as a guest.

Ella: You guys are so weak. She's obviously posing an empty threat-

Alastor walked past the Delightful Children and hit Ella on the head with her hockey stick.

Ella: OW!

The other Delightful Children silently giggle as Ella growls. Ashley yanks on Ella's ponytail as they all go back inside.

Ella: Hair! Hair! Hair! Hair! Hair! Hair! Hair!

Alastor sits down in a leather chair and begins to start reading while the Delightful Children watch over her.

Alastor: Is this how snooty, rich people read?

Delightful Children: We are highly offended by that remark and no. You're in our seat!

Constance shoved Alastor out of the chair and the Delightful Children sat in her place. Alastor grumbled and sat against the fireplace.

Delightful Children: We must disturb you to ask this.

Alastor growled and angrily looked at the Delightful's.

Delightful Children: Why come all the way to our house just to read a book?

Alastor: For me to be able to read and understand the book, it has to absolutely silent and everyone keeps bugging me everywhere else. Now, zip it!

She goes back to reading.

1 hour time skip

Father walks into the living room.

Father: Children, I-

He sees Alastor as the two make eye contact.

Father: Should I even ask why you're in my house?

Alastor: It's easy, really. I forced your children to let me in so I could read my book in peace.

Father: That might work on them. But not me!

Alastor is thrown out of the Delightful Mansion.

Alastor: Can I at least get my book back?!

Her book is thrown out as it hits her in the face.

Alastor: Gee. Obrigado (Thanks).

She grumbles as she picks her book up and walks off.

Alastor sits on a park bench, twitching angrily as children play behind her. She groans and slaps her hands over her face.

Alastor: I'm never going to get done with this.

???: You need peace und (and) quiet, I hear?

Alastor: What's it to you, kumpel (dude).

???: Come wiz (with) me und (and) I'll show you.

The person puts a hand out as Alastor looks down at her book then grabs their hand.

Time skip

Alastor lays on her stomach while reading her book with a smile.

Alastor: You were right, this is a quiet spot. Perfect for people like me.

???: Exactly, Liebchen (dear).

The person walks up to Alastor, revealing themself as Heinrich.

Alastor: I still can't believe someone like you reads something like Everything Darkness... And Vampires. No offense or anything.

Heinrich: None taken, Liebchen (dear). I must admit, it is dark und (and) spooky, but zat's (that's) vhat (what) makes zem (them) a real treat.

He holds up his own copy.

Heinrich: I'm about vhere (where) you are.

Alastor: Wanna finish together?

Heinrich: Oooh! Don't mind if I do.

Time skip

They both close their books.

Heinrich: I can not believe it.

Alastor: I know, right!

Alastor and Heinrich: Xander vas (was) Derrick und (and) Emmett's identical brozer (brother) und (and) it vas (was) Sophie wiz (with) Derrick during ze (the) affair vhile (while) Elizabez (Elizabeth) vas (was) in ze (the) observatory wiz (with) Emmett.

The two giggle.

Alastor: I appreciate you bringing me here so I can read.

Heinrich: Anytime, Liebchen (dear). Sometimes you just need to get away from it all.

Alastor: So, since you're into this gothic stuff, I was kinda wondering if talvez você quisesse se juntar à Sociedade Gótica? (maybe you wanted to join the Goths Society)?

Heinrich: Huh?

Alastor: If maybe you wanted to join the Goths Society!

Heinrich: Vhat (What) is zhat? (that)?

Alastor smirks.

Time skip

The Goths Society members sit in complete darkness, the only light coming from their eyes.

Gabriel: Hello, Sisters. I have good news from Sister Alastor. A new member?

Lizzie: Is this one actually a goth?

Mary: They better be!

Alastor: They are! Kinda. Candles please, Sisters and Brother.

Four candles are lit and are pointed at a nervous Heinrich.

Heinrich: Uh, uh, guten tag. (good day).

Gabriel: A German hunter?

Alastor: He read the book with me!

Mary: Prove it!

Gabriel: Sister Mary! Alright. Who is Emmett's mother? And what was her relationship with Derrick's father?

Heinrich: Trick question. Zey (They) had ze (the) same mozer und fazer (mother and father) since he, Derrick, und (and) Xander were...

Heinrich and Goths Society members: Identical triplets!

Gabriel: Alright. I'll ponder on it.

Alastor: Sim! (Yes!)

Alastor hugs Gabriel.

Alastor: Oh, Mary, here's your book back.

She hands Mary the book.

Mary: No that's yours. I got a few extra copies since I was the first buyer.

Alastor twitches her eye and smiles creepily while turning her head to the side.

Lizzie and Gabriel: Uh oh!

They cover their ears as Alastor loudly screams in frustration.

End transmission

Trivia

- It is revealed that Alastor is referred to by her birth name outside of a Goths Society meeting, the same is said about Gabriel but he is called by his nickname

- It's revealed by Alastor that Gabriel hates going clothes shopping with his mother

- Gabriel's last name is revealed to be Sánchez while Mary's is revealed to be Crawford

- Lizzie references Operation G.O.T.H.S. at the end when she asks if the new member was actually goth. This is ironic since she only has a gothic persona during Goths Society meetings

- Marilyn wears a Slipknot t-shirt, a real American heavy metal band

- Mary is revealed to be a very fast reader

- It is revealed at the end that Mary was the first buyer of Everything Darkness... And Vampires

- Alastor reveals that her surroundings have to be absolutely quiet for her to fully understand her book

- Marilyn's name is a reference to Marilyn Manson, an American singer and songwriter

- When Alastor greets Wally, it could be a reference to Heathers, as JD says the same thing to Veronica when he first meets her

- It is revealed that Heinrich enjoys gothic things from time to time

- When Father throws Alastor out of the Delightful Mansion, it's reminiscent to the running gag of Jazz being thrown out of the house in Fresh Prince of Bel-Air

- Gabriel is revealed to be great with computers and hacking. Alastor suggests that he should be in the Kids Next Door, but Gabriel turns her down, saying that it's not his forte

- Alastor is also seen to be good with programming as she set up a chatbot of herself for Nigel to talk to while she's elsewhere, reading her book