Now loading: Kids Next Door mission: Operation Z.O.O.

Zoologically

Obsessed

Octogenarian

The doorbell rings as Nigel opens the door to an old Dorman with her hair styled like horns and a tail coming out of her skirt.

Nigel: Yeah?

Mrs. Goodwall: Excuse me, young man. But I'm looking for the, uh... The Kids Next Floor.

Nigel: That's Kids Next Door.

Mrs. Goodwall: Oh, yes! Are you one of them?

Nigel: I'm their leader.

Mrs. Goodwall: My name is Mrs. Goodwall. And I'd like to invite you and your friends to my children's zoo.

Nigel: Yeah, like I wanna spend my free time petting a goat.

Mrs. Goodwall: No, you don't understand. It's-

Nigel treats back into his house and closes the door.

Mrs. Goodwall: Oh, dear. How impolite.

The rest of the operatives are working on a device.

Nigel: How's the work coming along, team?

Hoagie: Who was at the door, Numbuh 1?

Nigel: Oh, some crazy old lady inviting us to some stupid kids' zoo.

Abby: Numbuh 5 hates zoos!

She stomped her foot.

Wally: Hey, Numbuh 1... Should I use a pound-o-matic hammer on this? Or just bang it in with this brick?

Nigel: Well, of course you should use the- uh! Ohhhh...uh!

Nigel falls over with a dart in his back.

Wally: Numbuh 1... Should I use the hammer or the brick?

Sector V except Nigel: Aaahh!

The rest fall over with darts on their butts, snoring.

Wally groans as he stands up, a yellow "4" tag attached to his ear.

Wally: Whoa!

He almost lost his balance.

Wally: Oh, my aching- Hey! I got an earring!

He runs over to Nigel, who just regained consciousness.

Wally: And you got one, too.

Nigel: Where are we?

Wally: I don't know.

A peanut was thrown at his head. Kuki is still asleep near both boys.

Wally: Hey! What the-

A man and woman stand on the outside of the cage that Sector V are in, with Abby asleep against a tree, Hoagie and Alastor asleep on the ground, Hoagie on his side using his hands as a pillow and Alastor on her back with her arms crossed across her chest like a corpse.

Man: Did you see that thing jump?

The man and woman start laughing.

Woman: Oh no! I think that one's dead!

Alastor rises to her feet without moving a muscle. She opens her eye and crosses her arms.

Alastor: Do I look dead to you?

Wally growls like an animal and jumps on the bars.

The couple scream and run away.

Kuki murmurs as she wakes up, Abby wakes up as well.

Abby: Oh... Hey, what's all the racket? And where are we?

Nigel: I think we're in a zoo- A zoo where they keep kids!

Delightful Children: Brilliant deduction, Kids Next Dumb.

Wally: Ha! It's about time!

He jumps off the bars and runs to the end where the Delightful Children were.

Wally: Someone should have put you Delightful Children From Down The Lane in a cage years ago!

Delightful Children: You mean like... yourself?

Wally: Oh yeah... I hate it when they do that.

Alastor: Do what? Say something smarter than you? Because it's not only the Delightful Children who do that?

Mrs. Goodwall, Oh, fabulous! The obnoxious brats cage is awake and full of activity! I see you've met your counterparts in the delightfully charming children exhibit.

Delightful Children: We are good children.

Bruce, Constance and Lenny held their hands together in front of them.

Alastor laughs loudly before scoffing.

Alastor: Please, the day any of you are good is the day I become (imitates Delightful Children) delightful.

Delightful Children: Is that a promise or a bet, Lenore?

Alastor: (normal voice) Neither, and the name's Alastor.

Delightful Children: Ignore her! Please release us.

Nigel: Yeah, you can't keep us here.

Abby: I know one thing- you better let me out if this cage!

Alastor: Isn't there laws against this? Traga-me um advogado! (Bring me a lawyer)

Mrs. Goodwall: Now, you see, this is exactly why I created my state-of-the-art children's zoo. Adults are fa-a-scinated by children.

She starts playing with her tail.

Mrs. Goodwall: But they're far too wild to keep in their house. I have so many exciting habitats here... Like the nerd enclosure.

Three nerds gather around a computer where a fourth nerd is typing one.

Nerd: Hey, let me use the computer!

The two start fighting.

Nerd 2: My turn! You were on the computer all day!

Mrs. Goodwall: The gossips cage...

Three kids gather around each other, giggling while two others in the same habitat are gossiping about the first gossip group.

Gossip boy: Oh, I cannot believe that she totally like-

Mrs. Goodwall: And, of course, the ugly children display.

Eggbert sniffles as he wipes away a tear while a girl picks her nose behind him.

Eggbert: Oh, oh.

Mrs. Goodwall: But by far our most po-o-pular attraction is our live feeding of the obnoxious brats to our schoolyard bully.

The bully sat in his exhibit with clothes and a pair of glasses surrounded by puddles of drool. He burps up a shoe and growls.

Mrs. Goodwall: And you impolite little brats are today's 2:00 meal.

She laughs evilly as she walks away.

Mrs. Goodwall: See you at lunchtime! Hee hee-hee-hee!

The Delightful Children start laughing evilly.

Delightful Children: Bon appétit, Kids Next Door.

Alastor: Oh yeah? I bet after us there will be a Delightful Six Course Meal.

Delightful Children: That dart took more out of you than we thought. The term is Five Course Meal.

Alastor: Are there five of you freaks?

The Delightful Children scoff with a hand on their chests.

Delightful Children: Rude!

Nigel hums as he checks his watch, that reads 1:45.

Nigel: We don't have much time. We need to get out of here now. Spread out, Kids Next Door!

Hoagie bites the bar, Wally scratches as the concrete floor, Abby is deep in thought, Alastor is seated on the ground reading a mechanics textbook, Nigel lifts Kuki up as she hits the top of the cage and comes crashing back down to Nigel. The Delightful Children watch them with annoyed expressions while piano music plays from their record player.

Nigel: Okay...uh...I...suggest we... panic!

Sector V except Abby and Alastor start screaming and shouting. The Delightful Children shake their heads at the Kids Next Door, David facepalming.

Abby: Will y'all shut up?!

Alastor sighs and loudly whistles, making the rest of her team shut up.

Wally: How'd you do that, Numbuh 6?

Alastor: Me and my "stupid" gap.

Wally: Oh yeah! Great idea, Gappy!

Alastor growls.

Abby: You shut up too, Numbuh 6! I can't think straight between your screaming, your whistling, and their stupid record player!

Abby gasps.

Abby: Record player. Ooh, that's it! I think Numbuh 5's got a plan, but it involved us working with the Delightful Children.

Hoagie: Are you crazy? They're the enemy!

Alastor: The day I work with them is the day I become one of them.

Wally's eating leaves off a tree.

Wally: Yeah, I ain't doing anything with those freaks!

Kuki starts searching their Wally's hair for bugs.

Kuki: Me neither!

She finds one and eats it.

Kuki: And besides... it's lunchtime!

Nigel: In a few more minutes, we're going to be lunch for a bully. And there are hundreds of kids here that need our help.

Alastor: Yeah, but do the Delightful Children fall under that category?

Nigel: Are they kids?

Alastor: ...You know what? Let's start calling them something else so that we don't associate that they're children!

Delightful Children: We can hear you.

Alastor: Good. So then you'll be able to hear this!

She blows a raspberry at them.

Nigel: Numbuh 6, stand down.

Alastor: Verdammte Kinder, immer so prissy und höflich. Es ärgert mich (Darn kids, always so prissy and polite. It annoys me.)

Nigel: We've got to get out here, by any means necessary.

His fist meets his palm.

Hoagie: Okay. I'm in.

Wally: I won't like it. But let's do it.

Kuki eats another bug.

Kuki: I'll eat later.

Nigel: Numbuh 6?

Alastor: I'm sure I can find another way out, if you just give me a little time.

Nigel shoves his watch in her face.

Nigel: That's something we don't have! Time! So, it's either we team up with the Delightful Children From Down The Lane, or we feed you to the bully first.

Alastor heaves a long sigh.

Alastor: F-F-F-Fine!

Nigel: Your play, Numbuh 5.

The Delightful Children pace inside their cage.

Delightful Children: We have to get out of here. Father will be most displeased if we're not home in time for our luncheon.

Abby: Yo! Delightful Dorks! You want to get out of this joint?

Delightful Children: Of course we do, you stupid girl. This place is humiliating!

Abby: Then Numbuh 5 suggests a little cooperation.

The Delightful Children hum in thought.

Delightful Children: What do you have in mind?

Abby: Okay. Check this out.

Hoagie and Wally try to pull down the tire swing. The Delightful Children walk over to their record player as Bruce takes off the record and starts winding the player. Hoagie and Wally manage to break the chain that was holding the tire swing to the ceiling. Ashley cranks the record player while her fellow Delightful's look worried. A custodian starts to come by. Kuki silently signals to them as Hoagie pushes Wally on the swing and Abby blows a bubblegum bubble as the custodian passes. Nigel and Alastor hold up the tire swing as they both lose their grip. Constance cranks the record player.

Hoagie and Wally hold up the tire swing to the bars as Nigel checks his watch. It's almost noon.

Abby: Numbuh 5 hopes this works.

She swings around the chain and throws it of to the Delightful Children's cage, making Bruce catch it while the others smile.

Abby: Now hook it up like I told you!

Bruce starts wrapping the chain around the record player.

Abby: You guys ready?

Wally holds into Hoagie's clothes while Hoagie holds the tire swing against two bars.

Wally: Check.

Hoagie: Let's do this.

Abby: Okay, Delightful Brats, let her rip.

Constance presses the play button as the chain starts reeling in. Hoagie grunts.

Hoagie: The tire's gonna slip through.

Wally: Hold on!

Hoagie: It's...It's working.

Abby: Come on! Just a little more...

The chain releases from the record player, making Wally and Hoagie fall back and groan.

Delightful Children: Now we're stuck in here without music!

Alastor gasps.

Alastor: I get it now. If an object on our side acts as a pulley between the cages it should liberate both sides from their enclosure! Brilhante Número Cinco. (Brilliant Numbuh Five).

Delightful Children: Huh? English please, Lenore!

Alastor groans.

Alastor: If something from our side and their side applies pressure on the openings between the cages, we'll be released.

Delightful Children: Oh. Well, why didn't you say that in the first place?!

Alastor: I did, you six only speak stupid.

Abby: Was there a meaning behind your talking other than insulting the Delightful Children?

Alastor: Yes. I noticed a flaw. Even though the chain is pretty strong, you have to think of the possibility of it breaking.

Abby: Ooh, Numbuh 5 didn't think of that.

Alastor takes off her scarf and hands it to Abby.

Alastor: Well, it's a good thing I did.

Abby smiles as she wraps one end of Alastor's scarf around the chain connecting it to the tire swing. She throws the other end towards the Delightful Children as Bruce ties the other end on the record player.

Abby: Wait a minute, what if your scarf rips?

Alastor: It can hold up through my sisters and I yanking on it for hours end. It's pr-e-tty strong.

Abby: Okay, if you think so. Wind it again.

Delightful Children: It's broken.

Abby: Wind it again!

Delightful Children: Okay, okay, but I'm telling you this is a waste of time.

Constance behind winding up the machine again.

Abby: Come on. Come on.

The two sides finally gone out and break, freeing both sides of six children. They walk out into the cage sides on the floor.

Delightful Children: (strained) Thank you very much...

They straighten up.

Delightful Children: Kids Next Door. Oh, and this is yours, Lenore.

Constance tosses Alastor her scarf as she puts it back on.

Alastor: Obrigado. (Thank you).

Nigel: You are... Welcome?

Delightful Children: Now if you don't mind, we'll be leaving.

Wally: Ah, why I ought to-

Nigel: Easy, Numbuh 4. We'll take care of them later. We've gotta free all the other kids in this zoo. So let's roll!

Kuki: Yay!

Wally: Go get 'em! Go!

Sector V runs off to free the kids.

They free the Nerds, the run past the Bully, who's growling, they free the Ugly Kids and run past the Bully again as Abby and Nigel stop at his exhibit.

Abby and Nigel: Nah.

The Bully growls and jumps up and down as Sector V free the Gossip Kids. They approach the Bully's exhibit again.

Abby and Nigel: Nah.

The Bully growls again as they leave. The freed children chatter loudly.

Nigel: Okay, we've got a big group here. So Numbuh 2, 3, and 4, herd these kids yo the nearest exit, while Numbuh 5, 6, and I-

A loud whistle cuts Nigel off as Alastor stands in the middle of the kids.

Alastor: Mind repeating that again, Numbuh 1?

Wally: Alright! Gappy to the rescue!

Alastor: Oh!

She groans as the operatives tasked with moving the kids run off and Alastor regroups with Nigel and Abby.

Kuki: Yee-haw!

They run at the kids, making them run away.

Hoagie: Yee-haw! Get along, everybody!

Nigel: Well, Numbuh 5, nice work today.

Abby: Oh please, my plan didn't work until Numbuh 6 used her scarf.

Alastor: But I can't take all the credit.

Nigel puts out his hand as Abby dives down with both her teammates.

Abby: Look out!

Nigel: Hey, what did you do that for?!

Alastor: Delayed reaction?

Abby: Look!

She pointed to a dart in the bench. Mrs. Goodwall stood culprit with a shotgun.

Mrs. Goodwall: Tsk, tsk, tsk. Such naughty children. It's a good thing my new friends tipped me off to your naughty plan.

She loaded another dart in her shotgun as the Delightful Children stood in the sunroof of a limo and waved.

Delightful Children: So long, Kids Next Meal.

They giggled evilly as the limo drove off.

Alastor: Why you little Delightful-

Nigel: Why those double-crossing little-

Alastor groans.

Alastor: Não acredito que amo um deles. (I can't believe I love one of them).

Mrs. Goodwall: Now, now. We don't want to be late for lunch, do we?

She pointed her shotgun up as the freed children ran to a locked exit.

Kuki: Yee-hoo! Look! The gate's locked!

Hoagie: Come on, this way!

Nigel, Abby, and Alastor held their hands to surrender.

Mrs. Goodwall: Hair out of your face, missy! We all want to see your pretty face.

Alastor gulps and clips back her bangs with her star barrette.

Mrs. Goodwall: I should've added a freaks exhibit.

Alastor: Freak?! Why I oughta- Can I at least put my hair back?

Mrs. Goodwall: No!

Nigel: You wouldn't happen to have another plan, would you, girls?

Alastor: I can't think under pressão (pressure) and embarrassment.

Mrs. Goodwall: Come on, brats and freak. The bully's getting hungry.

The three operatives wave their hands.

Abby: Wait!

The freed kids and operatives run into another dead end locked gate.

Hoagie: Oh, man. This one's locked, too.

Kuki: Let's go this way.

All: Ya-hoo!

Abby hums in thought.

Mrs. Goodwall: I said, "move it."

Abby: Can we at least just say we're sorry?

Mrs. Goodwall: What?

Abby: Yeah, we know we've been impolite brats. And we're very, very sorry...

She winked at Nigel and elbowed Alastor.

Abby: Right?

Nigel: Oh, yes! Very sorry.

Alastor: Very sorry, ma'am, we were little incompetent brats and we deserve to apologize.

Mrs. Goodwall: Well, now that's more like it.

Abby: We can be very polite, ma'am.

Alastor: Even more polite than the Delightful Children From Down The Lane.

Mrs. Goodwall: Really?

Abby: Oh, oh-oh-oh, most definitely. Now if you will be kind enough to take a few steps back, we'll show you.

Mrs. Goodwall: Well, uh, like so?

She takes a step back.

Abby: Perfect.

Mrs. Goodwall: Well, what are you waiting for? I wanna see some politeness.

Abby: Ha ha ha! Maybe later, sucker.

Alastor: Perdedor (Loser), can't believe you fell for that

Kuki yells as the kids trample over Mrs. Goodwall and run out of the zoo.

Girl: Wait for me!

Abby leans against a cage, eating some peanuts.

Nigel: Numbuh 5!

Abby: Hey!

Nigel: Like I was saying before, nice job today.

He gives her a thumbs up.

Abby: Ah, it was too easy.

Nigel: So, you ready to go home?

Abby: Unh-unh. Numbuh 5 is starting to like the zoo.

She throws a peanut into the habitat of the Bully, who's chasing around a screaming Mrs. Goodwall.

Mrs. Goodwall: Oh, goodness! Oh, no! Help!

End transmission

Trivia

- Alastor publicly reveals that she likes one of the Delightful Children, however it was in Portuguese so no one else knows what she was saying