(A/N: This Chapter is nearly 5000 words. You have been warned.)

Chapter 52: Epilogue

3 Months Since Dean Left

He was seated in the library, studying the words to these spells for the seventeenth time.

Even after being deemed as one of the natural talents in the school, Sebastian still struggled in the class, especially when it came to memorization. There was just this one spell that was in Arabic and he couldn’t get the pronunciation right.

Sebastian ran his fingers through his steadily growing hair, tugging on the ends slightly before letting go. Sure, it seemed as if he was having a hard time. But, overall, Sebastian had gotten far better at delivering what his professors wanted and his average had spiked in the past couple of months.

However, the one person that he wanted to celebrate with was in a different dimension. Just the thought sunk Sebastian’s mood further into the ground. Since Dean left, whatever loneliness he thought had disappeared came back with a vengeance. He never realized how much he had depended on Dean for companionship and confidence until his mate was gone.

Sebastian and Dean messaged each other as often as they could —which became daily after Sebastian cast a strong spell on his phone. But it just wasn’t the same. No amount of sweet words and reassurances could replace the expression on Dean’s face when he looked at Sebastian. Sebastian shook his head, trying to dispel his negative thoughts.

He decided to go with the approach he always took when his sadness got too much for him, he threw himself further into his schoolwork. Whether it was healthy or not, it was the best Sebastian could do.

—————

10 Months Since Dean Left

Dean, who had been studying what might have been an important artifact, turned to see who had called him. His colleague, Callie, jogged up to him with a wide smile on her face, holding a tablet in hand. Dean gently dropped the item in his hand and stood up. He was curious as to what had her so excited that evening.

“We got the comparison analysis back for those chicken bones that you insisted were not chicken bones and, well, they definitely aren’t chicken bones!” Callie rushed through her words excitedly and Dean had to strain his ears to catch everything that fell out of her mouth. He let out a sigh of relief when she finally turned her device to face him so he could see it himself.

Dean’s eyes widened as he pulled the screen even closer. The tablet had the x-rays of an actual chicken placed beside their bones and highlighted all of the differences between them. Compared side by side, it was very clear that they had not found a chicken.

“It confirms everything that you talked about!” Callie was exultant, jumping from behind Dean to get glances over his shoulder. “The size and weight of the ribs are far too big to belong to a chicken from the time period yet too small to be an ancient vampire. And, the bones on the spine break off oddly, meaning there should be a pair of wings there. But the size of the bones doesn’t completely match up with feii either! I think we’re finally in the right place!”

Dean’s legs almost gave out from under him. When Dean and Callie’s team was dropped off at the first site, they searched for and studied bones for four months before having to move on. This was now their third site and Dean had been nervous that they would never find what they were looking for. Now that they’ve found the new animal, they could find out if the hypothesis was correct.

He may be going home soon.

As Dean and Callie worked with the rest of their team that evening, Dean’s mind frequently went back to that thought. It was simply hopeful thinking on his part. With such a big project like this, they could be disputing a commonly accepted fact. It wouldn’t take just a couple of months to prove their theory correct or false.

But, Dean still had to hope. During the past ten months, being apart from Sebastian had been so much harder than Dean ever expected. Sure, he knew it would be hard, but Dean assumed that remembering all the years they would spend together later would help.

But, most of the time, when it was eleven o’clock at night and Dean only had some words on a screen and one physical photo to replace his mate, it wasn’t enough.

Dean needed to hold him, have him in his arms and tell him how much he loved him. Trying to get all that emotion across in a couple of sentences would never be enough.

Dean waved goodbye to his team, noting that a couple of them planned to stay up longer, and went to his tent for the night. Dean pulled out a change of clothes for the night and went to take off his shirt when his eye caught something on his bag.

It was the one photo he had been smart enough to print out before he left. The photo was a selfie of him and Sebastian. That night, Sebastian had been asleep, his skin sweaty and dewy from when they’d made love an hour before. Dean hadn’t been able to get over how beautiful Sebastian had looked and wanted a photo. Now, it was the image that kept Dean going in these long months.

Dean let go of his shirt and walked over to his bag, grabbing the photo.

“I love you, Sebastian.” He kissed the picture gently, then put it back again.

It was too late to do it tonight, but Dean would message that same phrase to Sebastian the next morning.

—————

17 Months since Dean Left

Warlo mentioned, frowning at the man across the room. Sebastian, who had been admiring his growing beard in the mirror, frowned.

“I don’t know, I like the shaggy look.” Nick commented offhandedly, his nose stuffed in a book. Sebastian grinned triumphantly, directing a smug look Warlo’s way.

“See, it looks good.”

Sebastian reached for his beard oil and started combing it through his beard with his fingers. Warlo scoffed at this but didn’t make a comment. Sebastian noticed him open his mouth to grow out his right fang and begin to inspect it on his phone. Even as he did this, he continued nagging Sebastian.

“Are you sure that your mate will like that scruffy lumberjack beard?” He asked with narrowed eyes. Sebastian probably would have been more concerned if he’d heard that phrase normally. Instead, Warlo had spoken while trying to keep his mouth open, so the words were all half-muffled and silly. Sebastian laughed, walking up to Warlo and rubbing his oily hands over the other man’s shirt.

Warlo actually hissed in response, pulling away to wipe away at the oil frantically.

“Warlo, Dean loves me just the way I am.” Sebastian said with full confidence. But as his thoughts grew darker, his wide smile dimmed. “He has to. It’s not like he can love me for my looks or body because all we exchange is words.”

Warlo was clearly about to say something else judging by the pitying look on his face, so Sebastian let out a relieved sigh when his phone rang. He had to jog a little to get to it quickly, but he evened out his breathing to sound normal when he answered the phone.

“Hello, Sebastian speaking.”

“Hey, babe.” Sebastian’s eyes went wide at the familiar deep tone. “It’s Dean.”

Sebastian leaned onto the wall next to him, a bright smile on his lips.

“Hey . . . ” He didn’t know what to say. They have been texting each other every day for well over a year, and Sebastian had been hoping for another call since the last one was a month before this. Yet, now that he had it, he didn’t know what to talk about. “Um, how is the research going?”

“Sebastian, I’ve been talking about this case every day for the past year.” Dean reminded him with a deep sigh. “Right now, I want to talk about you—about us.”

“Yeah, I think that’s fair.”

It still took him a second to come up with something to mention, so he went with the thing on his mind.

“Your voice has gotten rougher since you left, at least over the phone.”

“Oh really?” Dean asked, rustling being heard through the phone. “Because I would bet 50 that your voice got deeper since I left.”

“Really?”

“Really.” He replied, smirking as he spoke. “I think it’s kind of sexy, though.”

Sebastian laughed at the compliment, ignoring the heating of his cheeks. Then a thought came to Sebastian’s head and he unconsciously went to stroke his facial hair.

“So, how do you feel about beards—wait! Hold on a second.”

Sebastian, who was actually mid flirt, cut himself off when he remembered a certain McCain he had forgotten about. Sebastian gave a quick goodbye to his friends before transporting into Gavin McCain’s office.

Gavin had been nose deep in some lesson plans and nearly jumped at the sudden sight of Sebastian in front of him.

“You really have to stop doing that.” Gavin complained as he massaged his temples.

“Dean’s on the phone.”

Gavin stood up and reached for the phone without a word. Sebastian wore a warm smile as he handed his phone off to Gavin and left the older man’s office. Sebastian was just about to go in search of a nearby bench when he heard Gavin’s boisterous laugh ringing out loud and clear.

Since Dean left, Sebastian and Gavin’s relationship had slowly improved. The two had a bit of trouble getting along and starting conversations, but they worked through it. Sebastian might even be as bold as to say that Gavin was one of his friends.

Several months after Dean went, Sebastian had already received a handful of phone calls from Dean, but Gavin hadn’t gotten a single one. Whenever Dean’s team went into a nearby town where Dean could get calling, he would call his mate first and use all the time he could hear Sebastian’s voice again. Because of this, Gavin only got to text his brother.

So, Sebastian decided that he had to be a little less selfish and start putting in the effort to bring his phone to Gavin so he could talk to his brother as well.

It wasn’t even ten minutes later that Gavin stepped out of his office and handed his phone to Sebastian with a joyful grin.

“Thank you, Sebastian.” The gratitude on Gavin’s face showed that call meant the world to him. Sebastian smiled back.

“Of course.”

Sebastian teleported back to his dorm room, sitting out on the terrace so he could stare at his favourite waterfall.

“Did you like talking to Gavin?” He asked his boyfriend, staring up at the setting sun.

“I loved it. Thank you.”

“Of course. Why would I try to keep you from your brother?” Sebastian asked although he didn’t expect an actual answer. “Speaking of, maybe you should consider just calling him yourself.”

“And missing hearing your wonderful voice first? Not a chance.” Sebastian rolled his eyes at the flattery.

“So, I’ve been meaning to ask.” Sebastian paused, shifting his weight to lean back on the seat. “What do you think about beards?”

—————

39 Months Since Dean Left

It was a classic 90’s pose for girls calling just about anybody. Objectively speaking, anyone who walked into the room would have laughed at the sight. Luckily, Sebastian was completely alone that evening and no one had to see him like that. And, he was in such a feminine pose because he was calling Dean.

Gavin and Dean had spoken first—Dean finally called him on his own—and now the handsome immortal was all Sebastian’s for the rest of the evening. Sebastian had been excited coming on to the call and hearing his mate’s voice after all this time, but the moment they began to speak, something was off.

It wasn’t something obvious that Sebastian could easily explain. It was something in Dean’s tone that told Sebastian that there was something he wasn’t saying. That acknowledgement and Dean’s shift in attitude cast a heavy shadow over their entire conversation. Sebastian desperately wanted to overcome it and get things back to normal, but he didn’t know-how.

It was an hour into their call that Sebastian discovered why everything was off that evening.

“Uh, Sebastian?” Dean suddenly said as if asking if Sebastian was still there. It was an odd thing to say considering the fact that they had been talking non-stop for over an hour, but Sebastian responded.

“Yeah?”

He heard some rustling then some whirring of wind before Dean spoke again.

“I’ve been thinking about, um, things.” Sebastian raised a brow at Dean’s words and stopped moving his feet.

“What kind of things?” Dean could hear the joking tone in Sebastian’s voice and grit his teeth. He knew this was not going to be a lighthearted conversation.

“Things that are hard to think about sometimes.” Dean continued, staring down at the photo in hand. He sighed, clenching around his phone. “Things that might make you upset when you hear them.”

Sebastian rolled his eyes and flopped on to his back. He was still slightly smiling but he was tired of Dean stalling so much.

“Dean, please stop beating around the bush. You always do this.” He complained, his point having some merit. “Can you just get to the point?”

Dean bristled at the complaint. He was shaking in his boots all day, so incredibly nervous about what he was going to say. And here Sebastian was being so disrespectful at a time like this? He clenched his jaw.

“Fine, here’s the point.” He said, shoulders rolling back as he steeled his resolve. “I think we should take a break.”

Sebastian sat up with a start, his mouth hanging open.

“What?”

“Just until I get back. Or longer if you want.”

As Dean sat down on the sleeping bag he had been sleeping on for over three years, Sebastian stood up and began to pace.

“W—why would you even bring this up?” He asked as his voice began to break. Sebastian looked down and saw that his hand had started to shake. He clenched it. He had to stay strong. He couldn’t lose it now.

“I, becaus—you’re young Seb.” At Dean’s excuse, Sebastian scoffed harshly, putting his phone on speaker so he could throw it on the bed. Dean heard this but went on. “You’re in university, one of the best times of your life, and you’re stuck dating some old guy across the world in another dimension? You should be out there meeting people and getting to, I don’t know, discover your preferences?”

“I already know what I prefer.” Groaned Sebastian, pinching the bridge of his nose. “It’s you.”

“But, how do you know?” Dean shot back swiftly. He leaned forward in his seat, unable to relax. “And what about sex? Shouldn’t you get to learn more about your body and what feels good to you?”

Sebastian crossed his arms and walked closer to his phone as if getting closer to Dean.

“What happened to only sleeping with people I care about?” He asked softly, a wave of hidden anger in his voice. “Remember when it took months for you to sleep with me because you wanted me to save myself for someone important? Huh? What happened to that!?”

Dean silently cursed. His excuse for waiting before was coming back to bite him in the ass. In honesty, he had just been nervous and unsure but didn’t want to admit it. He didn’t care nearly as much about saving oneself as he had let on.

Of course, he didn’t want Sebastian sleeping around with other people or becoming the type to have one night stands like pieces of popcorn. But, if that’s what Sebastian truly wanted, he wanted to give him that. He couldn’t be selfish, so he pushed on.

“Some people don’t want that for their lives.” Dean bit back, glaring at the tent’s wall in front of him. Then, he paused, losing some of his anger, and sighed. “I shouldn’t have tried to push that ideal on you.”

Sebastian didn’t know what to do. This was worse than the last time. Instead of assuming that Sebastian wanted to break up with him, Dean was doing it himself. Sebastian’s resolve seemed to leave him. How did he keep someone who didn’t want to stay?

Sebastian’s eyes began to burn.

“Dean, you’re talking like a crazy person.” He told him softly, struggling to keep his voice steady.

“No, I’m talking like the one person in this relationship who has actually thought about this.” Sebastian was taken aback by the slight jab and narrowed his eyes. Dean’s voice rose. “Look, I don’t want to keep you from meeting other people or sleeping around, or not, if that’s what you want. I want you to do whatever you want!”

Sebastian grabbed his phone, pulling it to his mouth, and screamed.

“I want !”

Dean looked over at his photo again and felt his shoulders sag. How could he push someone away if they didn’t want to let go? How could he show Sebastian that this was for the best?

“I don’t want to trap you.” He admitted, his shoulders falling at the statement. For Dean, It was embarrassing to think that he was a burden to the man he loved. He didn’t want to be his burden any longer.

However, Sebastian didn’t believe it. He was incredulous to the idea that Dean would really break up with Sebastian completely for the other’s sake. He couldn’t believe that was it. He decided to say what was on his mind.

“Or you don’t want to trap yourself.”

Dean froze.

“What?”

Sebastian threw his phone on the bed again and walked away from it. He wondered if Dean was really going to make him say it? Sebastian threw his cares out the window and decided to say it anyway.

“Are you bringing this up because you already slept with someone?”

Dean was shocked. That’s what Sebastian came up with? Not once during any of this had he actually considered being with someone else during the break. It didn’t make sense to him.

“What? no—”

“Who is it? Is it that Callie girl that invited you there in the first place?” Sebastian butted in, blurting out the first person to come to mind.

“No, Sebastian.” Dean said, nearly laughing at the mere idea. “You don’t understand. I could never be with someone other than you.”

Sebastian frowned, glaring at his phone.

“Then what makes you think I could?”

That was all Dean needed to hear. He wasn’t going to break up with his boyfriend. Dean let out a long sigh and found his eyes drawn to his photo again.

“So, you don’t want to go explore?” He asked for the last time. Sebastian sighed tiredly, walking back to his phone and falling onto his bed.

“You’re the explorer in this relationship, remember?” Sebastian said with a soft smile. “I’m happy exactly where I am, with you.”

The two of them were silent for a second. Sebastian was waiting for Dean to say something and Dean didn’t know what to say.

“I’m sorry for bringing it up.” This was the most glaring thing on his mind. The two of them just had a lengthy argument just to wind up where they were before. He had wasted so much time just to find out that Sebastian wanted to be with him.

“It’s okay.” Sebastian told him through a heavy sigh. He may have been annoyed and a little insulted, but he wasn’t upset. “I forgive you. And love you.”

“I love you too.”