Rick, Shane and I watched as dozens of walkers poured out of the broken window. Rick had pulled the walker he just killed over himself to shield himself from the walkers while Shane and I ran off into different directions to get away from the now growing horde of walkers. Shane made a b-line for the bus and I ran off towards the kid. He was stabbing a walker in the head repeatedly.

"Come on." I yelled, grabbing onto his collar and running off into the other direction. We tried our best to dodge the walkers that we're coming at us from all directions.

"Move Randall." I said dragging along the fucking gimp that I was some how stuck with. That's when I heard the gunshots.

"Rick!" I yelled running towards the shots gimp right on my tail.

"Randall go to the fucking car lock the doors and stay put till Rick and I come get you." I said shoving him in the direction of the car. I weaved my way through walkers occasionally stabbing one or two in the head. I knew Rick was going to have over a dozen walkers on his ass from those gunshots.

"Rick!" I yelled again waiting for an answer.

"Dammit Rick!" I yelled again, this time I was grabbed from behind with a hand over my mouth and I was pulled down onto the ground. "Shh." A voice said from behind me and I could smell the slight hint of old cologne and gunpowder.

"Rick." I said turning around and he had a smile on his face. I threw my arms around him till I heard a scuffle from behind me. I let him go and he jumped up and put a gun in Randalls face.

"Oh. Shit." He tried to run away but Rick grabbed him.

"Where the hell do you think you're going?" He asked Randall.

"Randall I thought I told you to go to the car and stay fucking put." I said from next to the two men.

"What did you expect me to do? The doors were locked." Randall said and I rolled my eyes. I knew they weren't locked, I made sure. He was just lying to try and get away.

"Come on guys. Just let me go, man. That's what you came here for. I'm not gonna tell anyone anything." Randall kept going on and on.

"Will you shut the fuck up." I said very sternly and Randall looked at me like he was scared of me. Rick found the hand gun that Shane had and he picked it up since he was out of bullets.

"You wanna stay here? Help the guy that just tried to bash your head in? And who punched you in the fucking face?" Randall said as Rick and I looked over at the bus Shane was in. I had forgotten about Shane's right hook to my face. Rick was obviously trying to figure out a plan on how to get Shane out.

"There's 10 romers over there you think you can take them on. Look, they don't see us. We can get out of here. Ugh, fine but let me have a gun." Randall said in his little rant. I had turned Randall's little bitching out; he was more annoying than anyone I've ever met.

"Let's go." Rick said, grabbing Randall.

"Wait what?" I asked Rick.

"He did this. We're going." Rick said grabbing my arm and dragging me along with him and Randall. I could see Shane in the bus struggling to stay alive through the front window. The three of us ran out of a fence and to the car. It just didn't sit right with me leaving him there like that.

We walked past the gas cans that we had filled up. "Rick what the fuck are we doing." I said as Rick grabbed the guns off the officers that were there dead on the ground. He didn't bother answering me, he just started at the bodies and then grabbed Randall and we walked over to the car.

"Randall you drive. Raven, grab a gun. We're going back for him." Rick said and we got into the car driving fast up to the bus we broke through the gate and Rick yelled for Shane to get his attention.

"Shane, go for the back door!" Rick yelled as we both popped off shots at the walkers that were at the door.

"Now Shane! Run!" I yelled, hitting a walker in the head. I watched as Shane ran through the bus and shoved open the back door.

"Get in! Come on!" I yelled as I shot randomly into the walkers that were making their way through the bus.

"Go, man, Go!" Rick yelled at Randall back up and busted out of another gate. We all settled into our seats and caught our breath.

"Shane you're hand." I said now, noticing the cut on his palm.

"I used my blood to distract them." He said and I ripped part of my shirt off and wrapped his hand in it.

"That will have to do till we get back." I said moving back to my side of the car.

"Thank you." He said and he leaned against the window of his seat. The cold glass felt nice against my hot skin. All the adrenaline and fear had rushed so much heat through my body not to mention the fact that it was at least over 80 degrees outside.

"Hell yeah! You see that? You see what we did?" Randall said and Rick pointed his gun at him.

"Just keep driving." He said and Randall shut up. We drove for a while in silence except for our breathing.

"Pull over here." Rick finally said and Randall did. Then him and Shane got out. Rick ripped Randall out of the car and tied him back up.

"Raven, headphones." He said and I grabbed them from my pocket and handed them to Rick and he pulled them back into Randall's ears. Then they picked him up and threw him back into the trunk with a bag over his head.

"If you wanna kill me, you're gonna have to do better than a wrench." Rick told Shane as we all leaned against the trunk. His comment made me smile a little but that faded with what Rick said next.

"Probably gonna have to kill that boy, but I am gonna think about it at night. It can't be that easy, killing someone, killing anyone. No offense Raven." Rick said mostly to Shane except for the last part obviously.

"It's okay. I understand." I said as our pinky's interlocked. I had realized we were that close to each other. Then Rick paused for a moment.

"That is my wife. That is my son. That is my child. If you're gonna be with us, you gotta follow my lead, you gotta trust me." Rick said and these words seemed to upset Shane but he understood. At least I hoped. Rick got up and looked at Shane.

"It's time for you to come back." Rick said to Shane handing him his gun back. I stood up and got in front of both of them.

"You two have always fought like cats and dogs but, in the end it's alway you two. Brothers. So can you both please put your differences aside, I hate being the middle person. I always get hurt." I said and they both laughed at me and we all got back into the car. We all drove back thinking about what had happened and all the new information Randall gave us. Shane was thinking about everything Rick had told him. And Rick was thinking about what he was going to do with Randall.

When we got back Rick gathered everyone and told them what Randall failed to tell us the first time.

"Raven and Daryl are going to interrogate him. Find out if he knows anymore than he told us." Rick told them and Daryl and I dragged him over to the shed and shoved him in a stall. We threw him against a wall and I pulled Daryl off to the side.

"You don't have to do this. You can leave." I whispered to him as Randall was begging for his life.

"Nah, I ain't goin' anywhere." He said looking over her shoulder and the crying kid. "Daryl, I would really rather you didn't see this side of me." I was nervous as to what he would think. He just simply shook his head.

"You ain't gonna scare me." He said and I sighed.

"Promise whatever you see me do won't change how you look at me." I asked him basically pleading and hoping he would just leave.

"Promise." He said and I nodded.

"Give me a minute okay." I said walking to the other side of the shed. I tuned out whatever him and Daryl were doing and brought myself back to Iraq. I had done a lot of interrogations most of them involved torture. Which I sadly was the best at since I could turn my emotions on and off like a switch. I thought back to all the interrogations and like the switch flipped off my emotions. I opened my eyes and it was like the whole world was now a shade of red and the old me was gone. When I turned back around Daryl had punched Randall in the face and the boy fell to the floor spitting out blood.

"That will do Daryl." I said my voice was like ice.

"How many are in your group." I said now getting down to his level on my hind legs and I gripped his hair.

"I told him." He cried and Daryl spoke behind me.

"You told me shit!" Daryl said and I pulled the boy to an upright position.

"I barely knew those guys. I met 'em on the road." Randall said.

"That's not the question I asked. How many in your group?" I said as the boy shook with fear like the devil was in my eyes. He didn't say anything.

"Daryl, can I have your knife please." I said holding my hand out but keeping my eyes on the boy.

"No no no no no no, come on, man." Randall begged and I felt the cold metal of the knife in my palm. I gripped it and ripped open the boy's shirt and brought the knife to sit right against his chest. Any movement would have cut him.

"How many." I asked again, pressing the blade harder into him.

"Uh, 30. 30. 30 guys." He said tears fell from his face and I smiled.

"You're lying." I whispered and I gave him a good cut to his left peck. He screamed.

"Where are they?" I said bring the blade to the same spot.

"Uh... I don't know. I swear." He cried.

"Liar." I said and I sliced his other side.

"I swear. We were never, any place more than a night." He said crying and then I looked at his leg. I moved his pants and placed the tip of the blade into the stitches.

"Doing what? Scouting? Planning on staying local?" I asked and the boy shook his head.

"I don't know. They... They left me behind. You were there." I looked into his eyes with a sinister smile.

"You ever pick off a scab. I'm going to start off real slow at first." I said and he cried.

"I'm trying to cooperate." He cried and I dug into him more.

"Sooner or later, you've just gotta rip it off." I said pushing further into his leg.

"Okay. Okay. They have weapons. Heavy stuff, Automatics. But I didn't do anything." He cried and I laughed.

"You're boys shot at me and my boys, and tried to take this farm. You just went along for the ride. You're trying to tell me you're innocent?" I said easing up on his leg.

"Yes! These...These people took me in. Not just guys, a whole group of 'em. Men and women, kids too. Just like you people. Thought I'd have a better chance with them, you know? But...we go out, scavenge...Just the men." I stood up and back away from him listening to his story while setting down the knife and grabbing some pliers that we had found lying around. "One night we... We found this little campsite. A man and his two daughters... teenagers, you know? Real young. Real cute." Randall paused and it hit me. His group were a fucking bunch of rapists and so was he. I slowly turned to face him, my eyes felt like fires were burning in them as my anger built. "Their daddy had to watch while these guys...they... and they didn't even kill him afterwards. They just...they just made him watch. As his daughters...they just... just left him there."

It was almost as if he was reminiscing about what had happened, how all those men raped those girls and made their dad watch. Like he was enjoying talking about it till he remembered where he was. "No, but... but I didn't touch those girls. No I swear I didn't to..." I cut him off by giving him a very swift kick to his manhood. "Please...Please you gotta believe me, man. I'm not like that. I ain't like that." Randall said but I didn't care how much he begged. I stomped on his already fucked up leg and went back for the knife and just went at the kids cutting not deep enough for him to bleed out but just enough to leave scars.

We spend the whole night going back and forth between punches and kicks to knife cuts. We stopped once the sun came up. I was exhausted and the kid was passed out. I closed my eyes and it was like my alter ego had left and it was just normal me. I looked around and over at Randall, he was littered in cuts and bruises and he had a bit of blood falling from a few of his fingers. I looked around his hand and saw the pliers and they were covered in blood and next to them were two whole fingernails. It all hit me like a ton of brick and Daryl grabbed me and held me while I got a grip on myself.

"We need to go tell the others." I said standing up only to have my legs fail me but Daryl was there to catch me.

"You need sleep. Let's go. You can crash in my tent." He said and he helped me out of the barn.

Once I started walking it was easy for me to do so on my own. Daryl and I walked side by side as we reached the group who was all outside waiting for us to come back. I was covered in blood and sweat. Daryl's knuckles were barely bruised.

"Boy there's got a gang, 30 men." Daryl started and I cut in.

"They're heavily armed and aren't looking to make friends. They come through and our boys are dead. And our women they're gonna..." I stopped flashing back to the CDC and imagining that happening to all our girls.

"They're gonna wish they were dead." Daryl said, placing a hand on my shoulder.

"What did you do?" Carol asked Daryl.

"I didn't do anything other than throw a few good punches. Raven did it all." Daryl said back to Carol.

"Come on." Daryl told me and we walked away from the group to his tent.

"Go on. Lay down, get some rest." Daryl said and I nodded and once my head hit that bag I was out like a light. But the nightmares only let me sleep a few hours. I could see myself in like 3rd person watching me torture Randall. His screams and him begging me to stop. I popped up in a massive sweat. I got up and out of the tent and walked over to Daryl.

"Hey." I said popping my back.

"You didn't sleep long." He said looking at his bolts that he made.

"Couldn't really sleep. Nightmares." I said sitting down on the log in front of him.

"Daryl. You don't think differently of me do you?" I asked him scared that his answer would be yes and that he would want me to stay away from him.

"Nah. You did what you had to." He said looking up at me and before I could speak I noticed Dale and so did Daryl.

"The whole point of me coming up here is to get away from you people." Daryl said and I looked at him with a fake I'm hurt look.

"Gonna take more than that." Dale said, tossing down a stick into the pile of wood.

"Carol sent you?" Daryl asked Dale.

"Carol's not the only one that's concerned about you, and Raven. And your new role in the group." Dale said and I just shook my head.

"Man. I don't need my head shrunk. This group is broken. I'm better off fending for myself." Daryl said and I sighed.

"I'm with Daryl on this. Some of us would do much better without all this. Just on our own."

"You act like you don't care." Dale said mostly to Daryl.

"Yeah, it's 'cause I don't." Daryl said pulling on his long sleeve button up and his vest.

"That's not what I've seen. Especially when it comes to that girl right there. So live or die, you don't care what happens to Randall?" Dale said and I was shocked with the first part of what he said. Daryl still gave a shit about me. After pushing him away for a while he still cared.

"Nope." Daryl spoke and grabbed his now cleaned knife.

"Then why not stand with me, try to save the kid's life, if it really doesn't matter one way or the other?"

"Didn't peg you for a desperate son of a bitch."

"Your opinion makes a difference."

"Man, ain't nobody looking at me for nothing."

"Carol is, and I am. Right now. And you, obviously you have Rick's ear."

"Rick just looks to Shane. Let him." The two men bickered about and I just ignored it till Dale said my name.

"Raven, what about you. You saved him in the first place." Dale was now begging for someone to help him save the kid.

"Dale you weren't in there. You didn't see what I saw. Especially in that boy's eyes when he was telling us about his group and what they did. He can die just like the rest of them. Shane can go right along with 'em." I said getting up and walking back to the house. I found Carl walking off into some trees.

"Hey Carl." I ran and caught up with him.

"You know you're not supposed to wonder off on your own." I said and he shrugged.

"Well. I'm not on my own. You're here." I smiled and we kept walking till I heard Rick's voice calling out for Carl.

"Carl, Come over here." Rick called and I looked at the boy.

"Go on, I can tell you're already in trouble and don't want to cause more. I'll wait right here." I said and I nudged him towards his dad.

"Did you talk back to Carol?" Rick asked and Carl very plainly and cooly responded.

"No."

"She says you did. You can't talk back to people like that." Rick said and Carl paused and I walked over closer to them.

"I said it's stupid to believe in heaven." Carl said and I sighed.

"Carl." I said and I shook my head crossing my arms.

"Honey look, it may be stupid to you and to most of us to believe in heaven but for Carol. It's something she needs to be able to move on from losing her daughter. Knowing she's somewhere better and safer from the world we have now. It's a comfort to her." I said looking at the boy at eye level. He nodded and then looked up at his dad.

"Carl you gotta remember to not talk sometimes but to think. It's a good rule of thumb for life." Rick said and Carl had a come back just as quick as I always did. It might have been my fault that he can always think so quickly on his toes and that sometimes he forgot to think.

"Mom always wants you to talk more." Carl said and I stood up with a smile on my face. Rick looked at me and I put my hands up in defense.

"He's your kid." I said with a laugh.

"Don't change the subject Carl. You owe Carol an apology. You made a mistake. Fix it." Rick said and he started to walk away.

"Is that why you're gonna kill that guy?" Carl asked his dad who stopped dead in his tracks and turned back to his son.

"Fixing your mistake?" Carl said.

"That's different." Rick told him and an obvious look of frustration spread across his face.

"How are you gonna do it? Are you gonna hang him in the barn?" Carl asked and I looked up at Rick surprised.

"You just think about how you're gonna make things right with Carol. Don't talk. Think." Rick said and he turned to walk away.

"Carl. Don't wander too far okay." I said running after Rick.

"Rick. Are you serious about hanging the kid?" I asked and Rick stopped.

"I don't know, Raven." He said stopping and facing me.

"Rick, look, I know you want him dead but, you cannot kill him like that. It's not right. Just a clean bullet to the head but don't fucking hang him." I said and he nodded.

"I'll think about it." I rolled my eyes at him.

"Rick you don't understand what I had to do. The kid has been through enough." I said my voice cracking.

"Raven, talk to me. What happened." He almost begged me to tell him what happened.

"No Rick. You...you cannot know that side of me. It's different. You'll never look at me the same." I said and he just looked at me.