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"Oh my fucking god," I whispered to myself as I opened my eyes. The first thing that came was the headache. Next, the nausea. And last, the reason. My eyes squinted at my nightlight, which was still on, and at the dull grey sky outside the window.

Flash was curled up on the blue carpet on the floor and Edvin, who I had definitely chatted up last night, was nowhere to be seen. I shuddered as I removed the blanket and got out of bed, running to the bathroom to puke.

Now, the thing about living in a dorm, that I probably should've mentioned earlier, is that you share a bathroom with 6 of your flat mates since there are quite many things you must have in common.

Education is expensive, people.

I waddled to the bathroom in my slippers, almost slipping on Flash as I left in a hurry. I needed to fucking get it out of my system. As I opened the door to the bathroom, Edvin was standing there combing his fucking hair. He saw the look on my face as I brushed past him and bent over the toilet.

Okay genuinely, one of the worst feelings in the world.

Edvin seemed to have dropped his comb as he quickly came behind me and gathered up my hair and lightly patting on my back as I threw up, "It's alright, come on now."

I whined as I got done and sat down, completely done with life, on the cold bathroom floor as he handed me some tissues, "What time is it?"

"10 am," he replied with a grin as he sit himself up on the slab, looking like one of those retro models.

"And why, no, how the hell are you dressed up so early?"

"I didn't drink much last night," he said as a reply, "A first for me honestly, I always get drunk."

I grunted, "Remind me to never drink again."

He laughed, "And onto the list of things that you won't be able to achieve."

I stood up and flipped him off as I made my way towards the sink, "Is the hot water on?"

"Yeah, I took a bath around 9," he said, slipping off the slab to get out the washroom, easily taking the hint.

I turned on the tap to wash my hands, "Alright, great. Also, you need to help me with something. Now, most people would find it complicated but I'm sure you can manage."

He stood at the door and raised his eyebrows, "What would that something be?"

"We need to go visit a couples counsellor," I said, reaching for my brush.

"We need to go visit a what now?"

"A couples counsellor," I repeated, this time stressing on the syllables.

"Why the fuck do we need to go visit a couples counsellor?!" he asked, completely horrified.

I snorted as I put paste on my brush, "So you remember Louie from last night?"

"Yeah?"

"And Tracy?"

"The girl who bought in all that alcohol?"

"Yeah. So, anyway, Tracy's dad is rich."

"Okay?" he said, sounding completely confused.

"And she has this on-again, off-again thing with Louie."

"Uh-huh?"

"So when they went off-again for the 10th time, she got her dad to book an appointment with a counsellor," I explained, because really, it couldn't get more obvious.

"And?"

"Well, they're on-again now so they don't need to go but apparently her dad paid a lot of money and if she doesn't show up with some issues, it can be a problem."

"And how do the both of us fit in?" he asked, looking at me like I had gone crazy or something.

"Well, I had to ask her a favor so last night I promised her that if she managed it, I'd cover up for her. Besides, doesn't it sound like fun?" I grinned.

He stood there for a minute and I plopped the brush in my mouth and started brushing. He then clapped his hands, "So let me get this straight, you want us to go to this counsellor and pretend to have problems?!"

"Mmmhm," I said nodding my head as I spit into the sink.

"Jamie?"

"Yeah?"

"Are you pathologically INSANE?!"

"A bit," is what I decided to say while I made him wait so I could get done brushing.

"So?" I looked at him, still standing at the door.

"I can't do that."

"What?"

"We can't pretend to be Tracy and Louie, you're mad!"

"The counsellor hasn't seen them before! You're an actor, why can't you pretend to be in a toxic relationship with me?!"

"Well," he began.

"Well what?"

"Identity theft is not a joke, Jim!" he blurted out.

I smirked, "Nice."

"I'm serious!"

"Well, I'm giving you free accommodation so you owe me."

He had nothing to say to that.

He scowled.

I smirked.

"I thought we're gonna make a bloody Christmas list or something."

"Aw come on, be creative! You're an actor, improvise!" I said, closing the door on his face.

"I hate you!" he called out.

"What? I can't hear you, I need to take a bath. Appointment's at 1!"

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"You're crazy," he mumbled for what seemed like the billionth time as we got directed into an office. The room had a huge glass window, lots of plants and wooden walls and floors. There were some paintings hanging on the walls and a snow globe on the desk, which also had 2-3 books, a lamp, a pen and a identity metal card thingie which read 'Dr. Marina Lamaze.'

I grinned and whispered, "That's a really unfortunate name."

He snorted.

We flopped down into the chairs and Edvin took a gander around until his eyes fell steadily on the snow globe. He picked it up and shook it. There was a snowman and a Christmas tree in it and after being shook the faux snow lifted up and started whirring inside.

"I love snow globes," he said, "they remind me of happy things."

"What happy things?"

"Snow?"

I laughed, "How very profound."

He grinned, "I'm just saying. I've never owned one. I guess it just wasn't something I ever particularly asked for but they've always fascinated me."

"I'd ask you to put it in your pocket but we're maxed out on crimes for one day," I said, as he handed it to me.

He threw his head back and laughed, "This is going to be a shit show."

"I think it's supposed to be. We're supposed to be deranged."

"Not exactly a problem," he retaliated.

I kept the snow globe back on the desk, "Mhm."

"How about we make a bet?"

I raised my eyebrows, "What kind of bet?"

"The one who manages to come up with worse shit about the other person has to buy dinner."

I smirked readily, "I'm in."

Just then the door to the room opened and a blonde woman wearing a white sweater and silver squared glasses came in, "Oh hello, Miss Chapman, Mr. Savage. How do you do?"

Edvin gave me a look as to say 'Obviously not well' but I lightly kicked his shin which made him offer his hand to the woman, "Alright."

I shook her hand too, "Yes, and you?"

She nodded as she made her way towards the other side of the desk, "Likewise," she then sat and signalled us to do the same.

Edvin looked at me.

I looked at him.

Game on.

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A/N: hello, I'm back from beyond the grave. Not exactly the longest chapter but I promised my new friend xnele07x that I'd upload one soon. Albeit late, I tried to keep right by my promise and I hope yall enjoy it : )