《Before I Forget - Eli Moskowitz -》Defeat Does Not Exist
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He had lost the fight.
The bruises and the cuts weren't as bad as the shame and regret. He had fucking lost that fight in front of everyone, had ended up unconscious on the floor like a fucking loser.
But even that wasn't the worst. Sensei Kreese had told him that the fight wasn't over yet, and he had a little plan brewing in his mind already on how to get his revenge, how to make Demetri, Sam and Robby, and all that fucking pussy club pay for what they had done, which brought some small comfort.
No, the worst part was what had happened with Sky.
Don't call me. We're on a break.
Her words had burnt a hole in his chest and he could barely breathe.
On a break.
What did that even mean? Would she actually break up with him? Over this stupid mall fight? Where Hawk hadn't gotten even one decent punch to Demetri?
So fucking stupid. Sky was fucking overreacting big time, but still, the possibility that this could be it, that this could be the end—
No, he couldn't even think about it. He aimed a fierce series of kicks at the punching bag, groaning out loud, sweat dripping down his naked upper body, droplets running over her name that was inked on his chest. The sounds of his feet hitting the bag echoed in the empty dojo.
Sky couldn't dump him. That just couldn't happen. He would make her see reason - she was Cobra Kai after all. She had to realize what was at stake here, that this wasn't some game anymore, this was a war between the dojos and Sky would have to pick a side.
His side.
She would have to pick his side and she would have to be with him, or either Hawk would fucking kill himself.
His muscles were sore and trembling already, but he punched the bag again, again and again. So fucking what that his knuckles were bleeding? The pain he felt only fed his anger.
Defeat didn't exist.
This fight wasn't over yet.
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Sky stared at the food on her plate - a chocolate croissant and some fresh strawberries - unable to force herself to eat any of it. The orange juice and her coffee lay untouched in front of her too - even their smell made her nauseous.
"Eat it," said Dad, sitting across the table, happily munching his bacon and eggs. "We have a long day ahead of us."
"Sorry Dad," Sky managed. "I'm just not hungry. I didn't sleep well."
At least that was true. She had barely slept at all, her mind going over her phone call with Hawk again and again.
She had told him not to call her, but apparently, he didn't think texts counted, for he had sent her many.
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Sky I love you
I miss u like Hell
I don't want to break up
please call me, let's talk about this
She hadn't replied anything to him, because honestly, she had no idea what to say. The sleepless night, nausea, and headache that followed, didn't make her thoughts any clearer.
"Sky, what is it?" Dad asked, finally noticing the sadness that lingered around her like a dark cloud. "You're hardly jet-lagged anymore, right? Has something happened?"
She shrugged. The words wouldn't come out, so she simply kept staring at her croissant as if it could speak for her.
Dad let out a long sigh. "Come now, tell me. Is it Eli?"
Sky's eyes teared up, her lower lip started trembling. All she managed was a small, shaky nod.
Dad placed his cappuccino back on the table, shifted on his chair.
"You've been arguing a lot lately," Dad said. "What is it this time?"
"We... we're on a break." Saying that out loud felt like a punch in the heart. Sky almost couldn't get the words out and her voice broke mid-sentence.
"What?" Dad exclaimed, clearly shocked. "Since when?"
"Since yesterday."
Dad was silent for a while, his brows furrowed and he let out a concerned sigh. His breakfast was now forgotten too, his whole concentration on Sky.
"What happened?" he asked, after a while when it became clear Sky wasn't going to talk first.
"He tried to beat up Demetri."
"The nerdy kid?"
"Yeah."
"But why?" Dad asked, clearly determined to get to the bottom of this. "I thought they were friends."
Sky let out a long, trembling sigh and told him everything. She told him about how Kreese had punched Demetri, about the Yelp review Demetri had written, and then about the mall fight, and with each step, Dad's frown deepened, and his eyes turned dark and worried.
"I'm sorry to hear that," he finally said when Sky had finished her story and a silence had fallen over them. "And I wish you'd told me sooner. That Kreese—"
"I know, you warned me about him. I should have... I should've warned Hawk—" She couldn't finish that sentence. Stupid tears started falling and she picked up a napkin to stop them, but they just kept flowing. She was fucking falling apart in the middle of the Hotel breakfast. "Hawk fricking worships Kreese, and everything he says."
"Sky, listen—" Dad took her hand over the table with a firm, warm grip. "We can deal with Kreese later, but first things first. You and Eli—"
A wail escaped Sky's lips, and she buried her face into the white, cotton napkin. She hated crying, hated the way it made her feel - all stupid and helpless and broken, but she couldn't stop the tears. She could feel the eyes of everyone in the room on her, was painfully aware of the public shame. But Dad seemed unaffected - his grip on her hand held, unwavering and strong.
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"You said you are on a break," Dad said softly. "Do you... want to break up with him?"
Sky shook her head, tears making her voice thick as she replied: "N-no. I lo-love him."
"And he hasn't... been violent towards you? Just that Demetri kid?"
Sky shook her head.
Hawk had said he'd never hurt her like that, and Sky knew it was probably true - he didn't like hitting girls. But if someone had told her a couple of months ago that Hawk would try to beat up his Binary Brother, Sky wouldn't have believed that either. And he had fought Sam at the Mall, so maybe Sky was wrong about everything. Maybe it would be her, who Hawk tried to beat up next time.
"Okay, then." Dad was silent for a moment, his hand still holding hers. "Obviously, I don't know everything that's going on, but let me just say that sometimes boys fight. I mean - I used to fight with my friends all the time when I was a boy. I once broke William's nose."
"Wait, what?" Sky looked up from her plate. "You did what?"
"I cheated on a test, he ratted me out to the teacher. I got pissed and punched him in the face." Dad muttered. "Not my proudest moment."
Sky couldn't help it, a giggle escaped her mouth. "Seriously? But I thought you've been best friends like forever."
"As you can see, not forever. Things got better when we grew wiser." Dad said with a sigh. "Anyway, what I mean to say, is that these things happen. Maybe you just have to let Eli and Demetri sort their business out and try not to get in the middle of it."
Sky shrugged, the mention of Eli and Demetri making her sad again. "I don't know, Dad. At least you had a reason to punch your friend. What Hawk is doing...." she didn't finish that sentence.
She had no words for what Hawk was turning into. Or rather, she did, but she didn't want to say them, as if naming it would somehow make it more true.
Dad was silent for a moment, finished his coffee, went to get another one, and brought Sky a glass of water while he was at it. Sky accepted it, and took a sip. Her throat still felt tight, the tears weren't far away.
"I don't mean to make you feel any worse than you already do, but I've got to ask this," Dad said when he sat back down in his seat. "Is Eli still coming here with his mom?"
And the tears were back, clenching Sky's throat tight.
"I— I do- do-n't know." she managed and picked up the napkin again to wipe her cheeks.
She had waited for it for so long, and she knew that Hawk had too. They had both been so fucking excited about it - the possibility to be on vacation in Italy together. Sky had planned on so many things, where they would eat, what they would do, how She would show him everything and he would love it, and love her more too for all the wonderful things they would do together.
She couldn't bear to think that dream was now shattered. It hurt too much.
And Hawk's mom - Sky knew she had bought the tickets already and if Sky now broke up with Hawk they wouldn't get the money back. It would be a disaster, a fucking disaster, and it would be all her fault. As she thought about how disappointed Hawk's mom would be, Sky's sobs grew deeper, the tears started flowing again. Sky really liked Hawk's Mom.
"You know, you don't have to worry about that now." Dad said sternly, taking her hand again. "It's not important."
"O— Okay," She hiccuped and wiped her nose.
"It's two weeks until they are supposed to come here. Give it some time, many things can happen in two weeks." A short silence. "Maybe Eli sees reason and apologizes, maybe you forgive him and you make up. And if not, that's okay too. We'll cross that bridge when we come to it."
Sky gave a shaky nod. Dad's hand in hers was strong and warm, it was like a rock she could lean on, and to hear his calm voice and words of reason, made her sobs calm down.
"But I think it's a good thing we're here now, and not home." he said after a short while. "It's gonna do you good to take some time off Karate. Get something else to think about. And maybe it would calm Eli down a bit too, to be away from Cobra Kai."
Sky looked up from her plate and met Dad's gaze.
"I don't know what to do, Dad," She managed through the tears.
"Luckily I do," he replied. "You eat your breakfast, get a shower and keep putting one foot in front of the other."
Reluctantly Sky picked up her chocolate croissant and took a bite, then another. The nausea was still there, but she forced the food down because Dad was right. Her heart might be broken, but this wasn't the worst storm she had faced, nor the darkest night. There was still life in her, and thus there was still hope.
Maybe there was hope for her and Eli still, because there sure as Hell was love.
She finished her breakfast and her cappuccino, forced every mouthful down like a good little soldier.
The fight wasn't over yet.
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