I have to say, dinner was definitely not a disappointment. I tried a bit of everything, figuring I would never have the chance again. A steaming pot of stew was served with fresh white bread with a thick crust. Then came a huge lobster served on noodles. Pieces of chicken soaked in creamy orange sauce and potatoes. For dessert, there was a spicy fruit cake with cream and a selection of ripe, colourful fruits. Dinner was also surprisingly civilised. Not much was said, but Drew kept his thoughts to himself, and so kept the peace. I sat beside Valeria and we spoke a little about Eddie and battle strategies. She suggested that I watched some replays of previous Games, so after dinner I bid the others goodnight and settled in the television room. I decided to watch the ones where Drew and Valeria won. After all, they were my mentors. Valeria’s came first, and it was one I had never seen before, seeing as I hadn’t been alive at the time.

Though her reaping and chariot debut were not memorable, she stood out in her interview. After receiving a respectable score of nine in training, she proceeded to wow the Capitol with her charm, laughing at the jokes the presenter, Venus Swift made and looking beautiful despite her cow print jumpsuit. She had the same strong presence she had almost twenty five years on, and her red hair fell in curls on her shoulders.

I fast forwarded to when the Games began. The arena was mostly made up of rocky mountains, and anyone could see how dangerous a place it could be. One slip up and you’d be skewered on a jagged rock. Valeria didn’t seem fazed though. She got caught up in the battle at the Cornocopia, but after killing several kids attacking her, the others realised she was a tough opponent, and this allowed her to escape into a cave with a bounty of food and weapons. There was a small amount of soft ground in one of the caves she camped in, and so she dug a ditch in front of the cave and a wall in front of the mouth to protect her. She only left her spot again when it got to the final three. The other two were still working as a team, boys from Districts 3 and 1. Somehow, they had stuck together, and hadn’t turned on each other. They tried to defeat Valeria together, but it was quickly clear that it was futile. The battle lasted less than half an hour and Valeria was crowned victor.

I felt nervous as I pressed play on Drew’s tape. I had seen it before, but something made me scared of what I was about to see. It had been a horrible Games. It was set in an abandoned city, and it reminded me of the destroyed images of District 13. I spotted Drew straight away, frowning ahead at the Cornocopia, obviously trying to figure out what to do. When the gong sounds, he runs speedily to the Cornocopia, grabs a rucksack and a small bag of apples. However, around ten minutes after the bloodbath finishes and the Careers had headed off, he remerged from behind a building. Grinning, like a young boy, he ran back to the Cornocopia and looked through all the goods the Careers had left behind. There was all the food that they had turned their noses up at, plus a couple of knives and shields. He had been very lucky. And so, he made himself at home inside the Cornocopia. During the days, he watched out for tributes, and hid behind a table when he spotted any. Some days, he ventured out and found toys in the wreckages of the buildings, and the smile on his face when he played with a yoyo brought tears to my eyes. He had quite good sponsors, obviously as moved by the young boy as I was. I couldn’t believe the mess of a man that I had just met was the same boy who looked so carefree in the tape.

Then things began to change. They were down to the last eleven tributes, when Drew’s hiding place was ambushed. The tributes from District 2 attacked together, and Drew was overwhelmed. Then, from out of nowhere, the young girl from District 6 appeared and smashed the skulls of both of them with a hammer. They were dead before they could react. The girl turned to face Drew and smiled. She was pretty, with long blonde hair to her thighs, and you would never have guessed she was a ruthless killer. To her belt, she had three different knifes attached, plus a spare hammer. Unsurprisingly, Drew looked terrified.

“Hey. No need to look so scared. I’m not going to hurt you,” she said. “My name is Lucia.”

Drew stood up and shook her hand cautiously “I’m Drew. Do you…want to be allies? I have lots of food.”

“I thought you’d never ask.”

Over the next few days, I could see a great friendship blossoming. Every time Lucia smiled, I swear I could see Drew shining like a star. They made easy conversation about their homes, and no one would have thought they were in an arena trying to kill each other. On the third night of their alliance, when they were in the final six tributes, Lucia offered to share her sleeping bag with Drew. He crawled in next to her and she snuggled into him and fell asleep. When they woke the next morning, Lucia whispered “You’re my best friend, Drew. And you always will be. But we have to part now. It’s better this way.”

She laid a kiss on his curly hair and left. She took nothing with her, except Drew’s heart. It was clear he loved her, and without her, he was nothing. The day she died, he sat for hours and did nothing. When her face flashed in the sky, he went looking for her, calling her name. He was attacked by a tribute, and he stabbed her without a seconds thought. Only then did he cry, and when he cried, I found myself wiping my cheeks frantically to blot my steady flow of tears. I made myself watch until the very end. The tears had passed and the anger arrived. Drew’s final opponent lay on the ground, unconscious. Drew lifted Lucia’s hammer in the air and smashed the girl’s head repeatedly. On and on, he didn’t stop, not even when the cannon fired. Someone had to drag him away from the body. He was victor, but in the end he hadn’t won. He had lost everything.

“Enjoying the show?”

I whipped my head around. Drew. He looked emotionless, but I knew better.

“Of course not. I’m training,” I sniffed.

“Yeah, yeah. You’re worse than the Capitol people. Crying like that, as though you know me. As though you know what I went through, losing Lucia.”

“As it happens, I do. My brother. Last year. You would have mentored him,” I snapped. Drew looked surprised.

“Jonah? He was your brother?”

“Yes he was. So don’t you dare judge me. Don’t you dare. Maybe if you had been a better mentor, he’d still be alive. You only think of yourself” I snarled.

Drew looked at me nervously. It was the first time I had seen him feel the consequences of his actions “Raven, I’m sorry.”

I turned away so he couldn’t see my tears “Yeah? Well so am I.”

I sat in silence for a minute, thinking he had left, but he surprised me and came and sat beside me. He pulled his knees up to his chin, and I was reminded of the boy I saw in the Games. Lost and alone.

“You know, I wasn’t always this way. I used to be a nice guy…or so I like to think,” he said, laughing with no humour “I wish I’d died in that arena. It’s easier to die than live with the pain. It’s a lose lose game. What does winning mean if you have to live with your actions?”

I nodded, but said nothing.

“My parents don’t want to know me now. They think I’m mad. Messed up. Wouldn’t it be so much better if Lucia had lived?”

“I can see why you think that.”

“Have you ever been in love? Oh…of course. Edward.”

I shuffled uncomfortably “Uhh…yeah.”

“You’re not fooling anyone.”

I laughed “As long as I convince Valeria, I’m not bothered.”

“She’d kill you if she knew.”

“Literally.”

And at that moment, I saw Drew smile for the first time. Properly. And I smiled back. Then he left and I allowed myself a moment of satisfaction. Drew had opened up to me, and I was a step further to befriending him.