《Infinity || Dan Smith》Thirty-Five.
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After watching the video of Charlie's father...both Dan and Charlie say very little. Both are in shock that Aubrey could be that spiteful and vicious. Charlie never understood why Aubrey 'overacted', but now she knows exactly why.
"He was a much better father than me." Dan whispers with a smile in hopes to raise Charlie's spirits, but Charlie doesn't smile.
"Dad left me a note." Charlie tearfully admits while staring at the screen.
"It was mainly drawings than writing, but they wasn't dark or fucked up. They was weird cartoon characters, freaky...but cute. He drew himself, my mum, and me. There was rainbows made in crayon and...pretty sure he went overboard drawing unicorns." Charlie smiles while she looks at her father's face, who is paused on the screen.
"The suicide note was...basically whole notepad full of things. Mainly fun activities, like word searches, or naughts and crosses, and pictures of horses from magazines. On the very end page it says 'I love you very much'. He didn't say he was sorry...he just kept it positive." Charlie longingly stares at her father.
The tears don't stop.
Dan on the other hand puts his arm around Charlie's shoulder. "I read it...every single night before I go to bed, you know? A mad man's suicide activity book." Charlie laughs in disbelief, but the fucked up thing is that she likes it. She likes how different her father was.
She's mortified that he ended his life over...nothing.
"He was proud of you. Three hundred and nineteen baby photos. We have nothing! Who's the shitty parents now." Charlie laughs at Dan's joke before curling up besides him. Her head pressed against Dan's chest. Their warmth radiating off of each other...
"I have a secret..." Charlie whispers.
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"Oh yeah? What kind of secret?"
"I ran away from home when I was fourteen, and I lived in a caravan park by the seaside. On my nineteenth birthday....I realised that I over aged my dad and...then came my emo stage." Despite not remembering a single thing about her father. Charlie devotes her entire life to him. She loves him more than words can say...and today she found out that he really did love her.
"So you lived by yourself...in a caravan...when you was fourteen?" Charlie nervously laughs nodding her head.
"How comes you're a fucking ballerina? And speak so nicely...and like...how..." Charlie smiles at Dan's disbelief. She's glad someone has noticed that she's a classy girl.
"I didn't loose myself. I refused to be like the other...not so posh people. My mum used to tell me that my daddy was a fancy guy. I know he didn't look it on that tape but my grandparents were rich. I used to attend their evening parties, I know how to create small talk and divert everyone's attention. The only reason why I didn't stay with them is because they was mentally and physically abusive. I got my payback when I stole her pearl necklace and heirloom ring." Dan feels completely sympathetic for Charlie.
He cannot help but think how someone could possibly hurt her.
"I still have the caravan. I go to it sometimes and just...hug into the hard sofa...and cry. I just felt so lonely, and sometimes I still do. But since finding out about the baby it's impossible to feel alone." This isn't what Dan wants to hear, but he is thankful that Charlie is telling him instead of bottling it up.
"You're not really a tough girl, are you?" Dan has always thought Charlie was feisty, but for the past few days he has seen the real her. She's the most fragile thing in the universe. He doesn't realise how blind he was.
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Charlie Let's our a nervous laugh as she shakes her head. Dan then kisses her on the lips. A soft, but comforting, kiss. Charlie then grabs ahold of Dan's head and turns the kiss from something innocent into...something not.
But Dan pulls away before they take it to the next level.
"Are you okay?" Charlie says looking either concerned or embarrassed. Dan's never willingly pulled away from a kiss before.
"Yeah..." Dan's voice trails off while he then fakes a yawn, which of course turns into a real one.
"I'm still aching...I think we both deserve a good nights sleep." Charlie nods her head a little before sinking down in the bed. Her body is curled on top of Dan's.
While they say nothing, Charlie then picks up Dan's hand and places it on her flat stomach. Dan kisses Charlie's forehead while his thumb ever so lightly brushes against her soft bare skin of her belly.
At least they have each other.
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