I've been in the beast glades for three days now.

I've run into a few of mana beast but they were at the most C class.

I managed to find a couple of food sources such as fish and berries but it didn't exactly fill me up. It kinda reminds me off when I was at the orphanage, when we had barely any food for a day and had to steal.

But enough off that I've got other problems ahead of me. There's about 6 men under me right now camping it's currently 9:00pm and haven't gotten a good night sleep for awhile which has put a dent in my fighting stamina which has made me exhausted.

All I want is some peace and quiet but these people are ruining it.

I jump to the next tree over and repeat the process as quietly as possible till I was far enough from earshot.

I wish I could go to Sylvia's cave and just hide there it would bring back some old memories that is if it's still standing which probably unlikely since that black horned demon infiltrated it.

"I wish you were here with me Sylvia.... you were the only one who understood me."

I lost my footing on a branch and fell into a puddle of mud which was just my luck. But I deserve it this isn't even my body I basically stole it from an innocent child I deserve pain Lots of it.

~Next morning~

I've finally found somewhere to wash up it's was a small creak the water was questionable color but I really didn't care since I smelled of sweat,dirt and dead animal. I made sure no one was around just in case And I took off my clothes.

I remove the cloth from my wrist and realized it wasn't healed up "that's strange" I thought. But continued scrapped all the hardened mud off with a rock and managed to get most of the stains out of my jacket.

I dry off and put back my clothes back on and rewear my wrist and start too fish a little.

I managed to catch one but I threw it back because it had some weird green mold on it.

I decided I wasn't that hungry anymore and tried to take a nap but was woken up by another nightmare.

I had the urge again the urge to cut.

But I managed to hold back since the last ones weren't healing for some reason, and tried to find something to distract myself but had no luck.

My mind just kept reminding me what a terrible person I was

And it was right

I was a terrible person so I deserve

I grab out my pocket knife and flip it open and cut myself without hesitation.

I felt I deserved this... the pain the suffering

Because I'm a terrible person.