~ December 24th 2020 ~

It's barely six in the morning and me and Lana are in town for early Christmas spirit. Apparently she needs a few more things that she didn't get in the Black Friday deals a month back. I don't know what she's after because I think they're for me. She's been super secretive.

"Ah!" Lana moans rubbing the side of her stomach. She's been doing this since last night. "We shouldn't of came out." I sternly say as we stop in the corner of the street outside Marks and Spencer's. Lana wanted to come in here for the Christmas stuffing?

"Fuck up" - Lana heavily breathes in and out as I take a bag off of her - "it's Christmas." That's been her excuse. However I firmly believe it's contraptions. "See..." Lana stands up from slightly leaning forwards. "The pain is gone. Probably a bit of gas." Only she didn't burp or fart.

My face must have the look of 'we need to go to hospital', Lana is getting annoyed. Either that or the pain is overbearing. "I'm fine. The kids are fine. You're the weirdo with the dodgy fucking heart." For fuck sakes.

If Lana was ever to die before me I can imagine her cracking 'I died before shit heart dude'. Honestly I'd be depressed as fuck. Why am I even thinking about her dying? Jesus this is dark. "Look, I doubt any other shops are going to be open?" Only a few popular shops opened up earlier than usual in Oxford Street. We've been going around in almost a circle trying to waste more time. We're not the only ones though. There's surprisingly a lot of people out.

At least this year it feels really Christmassy. The past couple of years have been fucking depressing. But this year everyone seems happy, even a few knobs wearing Santa hats...even the open shops blast Christmas music.

"When are you touring again?" Lana randomly asks as I laugh. "Can you not ask me that question when you look like you're about to drop." Lana looks at me completely offended. I mean it's the truth. "Babe - can we at least go home if you don't want to go to the hospital?" Lana gives me a scolding look.

"Maybe if you didn't fucking fuck me without protection I wouldn't have to look like I'm about to fucking dro-ah!" Lana shouts in pain as she leans over again. This time she is in a serious amount of pain. People walk past us. No one helps despite Lana clearly being overdue with twins. How I fucking love fellow Londoners. It's every man for himself here. Tourists and sightseers don't see that side though.

"Oh my god." Lana pants cradling her bump with both of her arms. "What's happening?" I hug her so we don't look weird. "I don't know." She cries in pain. That's when I hear a sound. A sudden burst of water falling out of the drainpipe and onto the concrete - but there's no rain.

"What the fuck?" I say looking up at the sky. "D-Dan!" Lana's voice loudly trembles. "Sorry I thought I heard water? Weird. Must've been a gutter or..." my voice trails off as Lana looks down completely horrified. "You did hear water." That's when my eyes widen at the wet patch below her dress.

"I'm having the babies." Okay. Oh my god. I've never done this before. What the fuck do I do?! "Can you walk?" Lana shrugs as I quickly push her the side. We walk fairly quickly and turn off at the nearest street. Thankfully this street doesn't have too many people walking about.

I grab my phone from my pocket. "It's okay. Just breathe." I say while Lana rests against a tree. "I'm fucking breathing dickhead!" Lana screams in pain as I embarrassedly try not to laugh. I then call 999 up and request for an ambulance. "Jesus fucking Christ!" Lana swears...once again. "Help is on it's way, sir." I know I should probably keep the phone on but I say thanks and hang up. I need to support Lana.

"I wanted a fucking c-section!" Oh man.

I supportively rub Lana's back while she holds onto the tree for dear life. "This is not where I thought I would be on Christmas Eve." Last Christmas was nice. I only saw Lana for half of the day but...we had no idea what we was in for this year.

If anyone asked my last year if I'd even have a kid again...I would've laughed in their face. "I'm excited but this really fucking hurts." Lana literally has tears running down her face, but she still tries to smile through the pain and heavy panting. "You're doing amazing. Just...keep your legs crossed babe." Apparently it hurts trying not to push - if women haven't dilated - and it hurts if they have dilated and need to push. The human body is so fucked up, no wonder why she wanted a c-section.

"I'm excited too, okay. Just...bare with the ambulance." I hope I gave them the right street name. I said it by memory in the heat of the moment.

Here's to hoping that I haven't fucked up the birth of mine and Lana's kids.