𝙰𝚛𝚎 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚑𝚘𝚕𝚍𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚒𝚗 𝚢𝚘𝚞𝚛 𝚙𝚊𝚒𝚗?

𝙸 𝚜𝚎𝚎 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚌𝚛𝚢𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚝𝚛𝚢𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚝𝚘 𝚏𝚘𝚛𝚐𝚎𝚝 𝚢𝚘𝚞𝚛 𝚗𝚊𝚖𝚎.

𝚈𝚘𝚞 𝚠𝚘𝚛𝚔 𝚜𝚘 𝚑𝚊𝚛𝚍 𝚝𝚘 𝚕𝚎𝚝 𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚐𝚜 𝚌𝚑𝚊𝚗𝚐𝚎.

𝙱𝚞𝚝 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚏𝚎𝚎𝚕 𝚒𝚝 𝚜𝚎𝚎𝚙𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚒𝚗; 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚜𝚑𝚊𝚖𝚎.

𝙸𝚝 𝚐𝚎𝚝𝚜 𝚜𝚘 𝚍𝚊𝚛𝚔 𝚒𝚗𝚜𝚒𝚍𝚎 𝚝𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝚎𝚖𝚙𝚝𝚢 𝚑𝚘𝚖𝚎.

𝚃𝚑𝚎 𝚑𝚎𝚊𝚝 𝚘𝚏 𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚒𝚛 𝚋𝚘𝚍𝚢 𝚕𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚝𝚜 𝚞𝚙 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚛𝚘𝚘𝚖

𝙱𝚞𝚝 𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚢 𝚙𝚘𝚒𝚜𝚘𝚗 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚠𝚊𝚝𝚎𝚛 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚜𝚊𝚢 𝚒𝚝'𝚜 𝚊𝚕𝚕 𝚢𝚘𝚞𝚛 𝚏𝚊𝚞𝚕𝚝.

𝙲𝚕𝚘𝚜𝚎 𝚝𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝚍𝚘𝚘𝚛 𝚋𝚎𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚍 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚜𝚝𝚊𝚛𝚝 𝚝𝚘 𝚠𝚊𝚕𝚔.

𝚆𝚎'𝚛𝚎 𝚊𝚕𝚕 𝚜𝚘 𝚝𝚎𝚛𝚛𝚒𝚏𝚒𝚎𝚍 𝚘𝚏 𝚘𝚞𝚛 𝚘𝚠𝚗 𝚕𝚒𝚟𝚎𝚜.

𝚂𝚘 𝚠𝚎 𝚜𝚎𝚊𝚛𝚌𝚑 𝚏𝚘𝚛 𝚜𝚘𝚖𝚎𝚘𝚗𝚎 𝚎𝚕𝚜𝚎

𝚃𝚘 𝚜𝚑𝚊𝚛𝚎𝚍 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚏𝚎𝚊𝚛 𝚝𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝚒𝚝'𝚜 𝚙𝚛𝚘𝚋𝚊𝚋𝚕𝚢 𝚏𝚘𝚛 𝚗𝚘𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚐.

Lennon showered and instead of getting into some comfortable attire that would help lull her to the sleep she so desperately needed, she put on a tight, white t-shirt and some black pajama shorts before Steve and Dustin arrived.

Lennon was sitting on the couch while her brother cooked them dinner. He let the boys inside and as expected, they both followed Brontë into the kitchen to begin drinking and eating at what little food they had in the house since the last time they went grocery shopping two weeks prior.

Lennon continued to read her book on the couch, listening to the show Brontë had put on the TV to fill the silence but the conversations going on in the kitchen pulled her from her stories.

Brontë made nachos in the microwave and some pasta on the stove. It wasn't he who ripped her attention from her novel, it was what Steve and Dustin seemed to occupy themselves with that caused her to get up from the couch and join them.

"What's this about the tournament?" Lennon interjected, leaning over the edge of the counter that separated the living room from the kitchen.

Steve was the first to look up from his second beer of the night. "Dustin here," Steve proclaimed as if he were hurt in some way. "Says he's not gonna make it to the game because he has a Hellfire tournament next Friday," Steve said before pressing his lips together with discontent.

Lennon already knew that but she had to pretend like it was news.

"We are right on the edge of something big, Steve!" Dustin spoke passionately and slammed the side of his hand against his open palm. "The next game is the final and we've fought so many giants to get to where we are now, it's insane."

Dustin had lost Brontë and Steve's attention but Lennon was still keenly listening to his retellings of Eddie's campaign.

"We are right at the mouth of the final dungeon. I can't just drop out now."

"It's the championship game, Dustin..."

"Postpone."

Brontë and Steve were both trying to convince the younger boy to find a substitute but he wasn't budging. Lennon tried to bite her tongue for as long as she could but she couldn't take much more of the bickering and lack of support.

"I think you should finish that game," she commented, causing Dustin to turn in question.

He was looking at her like he hadn't expected her to encourage him, let alone understand what he was talking about. He was staring at her in disbelief, mouth agape, eyes attentive but suspicious. It was obvious that Lennon had said something surprising or out of character and if Dustin started telling people she wasn't who she wanted people to think she was, she needed to change the subject.

"That's two fewer eyes to see me mess up my routine," she scoffed, rounding the wall and trying to make it seem like that was the reason she thought Dustin should spend his Friday evening with the kids of Hellfire.

Her plan worked and the guys were now talking about the basketball game. Lennon was able to clear up some of her suspicions about their conversation over a tournament but that didn't mean she wanted them to stop.

She took a plate of food from the kitchen and returned to the couch to let Brontë hang out with his friends in semi-privacy but she kept seeing Dustin in the corner of her eye look in her direction like he too didn't want to stop talking about D&D.

Her mind clung to the idea of Eddie setting these stories up for his friends and based on the way Dustin spoke about it, how interested and intrigued he was about the game, she knew he had something special.

She started to fantasize about what those games were like. She started to imagine what kind of voices he put on for them and what characters he had set out for their adventure. She wondered how the boys responded to him. She wondered how far their games actually went. Did they wear costumes? Did they fully commit to a character the whole way through?

She couldn't stop asking herself all those questions. She couldn't stop thinking about it.

Once she was done with her food, she rinsed her plate and put it in the drying rack before reaching for a glass of water.

"Why don't you ask her for yourself? Lenny!" Steve called out loudly, causing Lennon to tighten her grip on her glass before turning to find him standing in the middle of the room with his hands on his hips. "Dustin has some questions for you."

"Steve!" he said through a clenched jaw, widening his eyes at the senior who was beginning to embarrass him in front of the new girl at school.

"What's up, Dustin?" Lennon sighed, trying to ease her racing heart.

Dustin turned to look at her and gulped nervously.

Steve began to chuckle and moved out of the way to join Brontë by the stove.

"I just uh..." he began, drawing a blank once her eyes finally met his. "I didn't know if you've played before..." he shrugged, not knowing what to say.

"Play what?" she wondered.

Steve snickered and Lennon took what little water she had left in her cup and tossed it in Steve's face, only dampening his forehead and hair.

"Hey!" he shouted. "Not the hair," he whined, stroking his shiny head of hair and trying to shake the water free from it.

"Let the boy talk," she reprimanded him, turning to Dustin and seeing a surprised look on his face.

She didn't know if it was because he had never seen someone stand up to Steve or if it was because he didn't expect someone to take him so seriously; especially someone as beloved as Lennon. Most of the jocks in the school were jerks and survived on the entitlement they got from being from rich or powerful families.

Even though Lennon and Brontë had a wealthy amount of money in their bank accounts, Lennon didn't act like the rest of them.

"D&D... Dungeons and Dragons. It's a uhm..." he took a moment to consider if she was likely to care or not.

He continued to explain what the game was and instead of telling him she knew what it was, she kept quiet. She knew if she had told him the truth in front of Steve or Brontë, she would be spending the rest of the night insisting that she wasn't spending as much time with Eddie as she was.

The truth was, she knew a lot about D&D after that night with Eddie. It was why she was so empathetic with Dustin and his priorities to go to Eddie's campaign. She knew how enticing Eddie's stories could be and the amount of time, effort, and talent that went into the game was way more than anything Steve or Lennon could have put into the game.

"I've never played but..." she admitted. "Do uh... Do you wanna sit on the couch?" she asked, pointing past the bartop and showing Dustin the location she was asking him about. "I do have to admit, it sounds pretty interesting."

She earned herself a smile of appreciation and the next thing she knew, she was spending the night with Dustin who had only drunk one wine cooler the entire night because he was too preoccupied with Lennon to have been interested in what effects the alcohol could have given him. Lennon's company was far better.

They piggybacked off of one another: Dustin with D&D and Lennon with her writing. The conversation flowed like it was one of the easiest things in the world. However, Dustin grew quite suspicious of the new girl.

He considered himself lucky to have a conversation with her, not a lot of guys at school did; but she couldn't keep pretending to be the same girl she was at school and Dustin started to see it. Beyond that, he had to question her interest in D&D because Eddie talked about her just as much as any other guy. The only difference was, he managed to spend time with her and because of that, he had to wonder just how far Eddie managed to go with her.

There was no way... Right? No way Eddie, the freak, Munson managed to actually cuff Lennon Seagrave. He was good but he wasn't that good.

"Have you ever considered joining Hellfire?" Dustin giggled, having a little too much fun talking about the game to have concealed his enjoyment.

Lennon chuckled. "No," she shook her head. "I wouldn't have a clue what I was doing. Plus, I've got a full plate."

That was entirely true but it was enough to get her point across. She might have considered it if Vermont never happened but it did and she couldn't risk society frowning upon her; not anymore.

"You might like it..." Dustin added. "We'd all be happy to have you, actually... And uh... especially Eddie..." Dustin began, seeing that Lennon's smile faded quickly at the mention of his dungeon master's name. "He talks about you a lot..."

"Oh, yeah?" she commented nonchalantly. "He's insistent," she laughed.

"Do you not like him?" Dustin wondered, questioning if Eddie had anything to do with the fact Lennon didn't want to join.

Lennon hummed amusingly, looking away and raising her eyebrows humorously. What was she meant to say? 'Yeah! I like Eddie! I like how funny he is and caring he is but not in a romantic way'? Or maybe 'Yeah! I like Eddie! Every time I see him my heart races and he's become the only thing that helps me sleep at night since my family died'? Or would she flat-out lie and say no?

"I don't know him but I know I don't like the rumors I've heard..." she admitted, speaking softly to make sure the boys who were suddenly playing paper football didn't hear them talking about Eddie.

"He's actually really cool," Dustin praised. "He's an adult so he can do whatever he wants but if you hear anything about the devil, it's not true. I think you'd like his campaign..."

"I'm sure," Lennon giggled, finding Dustin's admiration for the older man endearing. "Is he...?" Lennon sighed, looking down at the floor for a moment and smiling nervously. "He's not actually dangerous, is he?" she wondered, looking into Dustin's charitable eyes, seeing a refreshing look of child-like mischief hiding behind them.

"Hell no!" Dustin laughed. "The dude can't even bring himself to kill spiders, let alone put people in any kind of danger," Dustin snorted. "No, I swear, he's more childish than me and that's saying a lot."

Lennon hummed warmly and tried to drop the subject after that. She knew that if she continued to ask about Eddie, Dustin was bound to make up his mind about her. She didn't need him spreading the news about her newfound crush on Eddie if he ever found out. If anyone other than Steve started to suspect them, she was sure she might have a heart attack before going back to school after that.

There was nothing worse than the thought of repeating what happened back home. If people saw her affections laid with a man who everyone thought killed people, did every drug in the book, killing even more with each sale, and worshiped the devil, her status, her acceptance, all her friends, her trustworthiness, her respectability, let alone her family name would all be ripped away from her.

She was already alienation and new and everyone knew who she was. But they only knew who she wanted them to know. They didn't know that she loved music or that she often spaced out whenever people wanted to talk about sports or fashion. They didn't know that she started a band with her friends in middle school or that she won the third-grade spelling bee or that her father was in prison for the murders of her mother and brother. They didn't know any of that because she didn't want them to.

She didn't need Eddie to take that away from her.

She wanted to take Eddie away from them; from the bullies, from the people on the news, from the haters, from the people that hated him without knowing him...

She couldn't explain it. It didn't make any sense how she could care for a man she didn't know. She didn't understand it. She just knew that protectiveness and affection existed within her and she could fight it all she wanted, but it would never go away; not as long as Eddie kept her safe.