《Don't Make Me Fall For You [SUGA Fanfiction]》31. Awful Love
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Toxic is what I should call her, especially her tears. Those tears were the first thing I saw in her, then her sorrow, pain and scars.
I fell in love with her scars, not her smile. Scars which have marked her heart, will I ever able to cease those pain for her? I want to, so badly.
Her wet hair was open, falling behind her back with the soft fragrance of lemon and her eyes stare at me with confusion as I pulled her to me. I don't want her to let go. I shouldn't behave like this but my own body wasn't listening to me, it was doing what its heart's want. What my heart wants.
Y/n quickly step back when I pulled her in, and instead of letting go of her wrist, I step closer to her, refilling the gap. She gasped when my hand caresses her hot cheek as I lean in, connecting our forehead, and I felt her hot breath hitting against my cheeks. She was nervous and so do I. My heart was beating so fast that it could burst. I want to claim every part of her, even her tears that she shaded for other men. I want everything that doesn't belong to me.
Can you feel my breath that longs for you?
Glancing down at her cherry tomato lips, I try to lean in more, slowly closing my eyes, ready to claim it.
My heart pound against my chest so bad that It hurts.
This awful love made my heart hurt so bad that I'm scared to lose her. I know, if I don't keep my words I am going to lose her forever. I'm not supposed to fall for her but..
Only maybe, if this gesture can change her heart then I'm not scared to do so.
Her lips are all I need to claim right now.
"Y/N, what the hell are you doing here?!"
The angry voice startled both of us as y/n immediately pushed me aways abruptly and step back, with the nervous and feeling so apprehensive by the sight of the man who makes his sudden appearance out of nowhere.
"Bae-Baek," She stammered, unable to proceed with the situation, looking at the man who always makes her cry, yet also the man who made her heartbeat at his presence.
"I asked you a question y/n?" His voice was darkly deep and sounded demanding, which overwhelmed the anger within me.
"Why are you yelling at?" Jisoo came rushing behind him with an inquisitive looked and her eyes analyzing at us with surprise.
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Baekhyun shifted his gaze from y/n and glared at me. His weird behaviour was getting into my nerves for some quiet days. What's his problem?
Y/n look at me but it wasn't just a look, It was different. two beautiful eyes showing concern, which melted me right away.
"Hyung! What happened? I heard a loud.." Jungkook rushes inside the kitchen as well almost tripping down when heard the noises but his words trailed off mid-sentence when he saw two more people beside then us in the kitchen.
☆
"Jisoooo noona, that's not fair. I want the chicken wings. You know how much I love it. It's the perfect combination with soju." I heard Jungkook voice coming from the other side of the room almost yelling out for the chicken wings. And me, accompanied by Baekhyun. We were alone in the living room to finish the unsettled business he has started.
Making myself comfortable on the sofa, I direct my eyes to him as he gives me the same looked. The mixture of Questions and agitation at each other as the room seems to get smaller and fills with tension growing up between us.
There was only one thing I need to find out. What is y/n to him? His recent behaviour was making me have a nervous feeling about their relationship.
"What is it that you want to know?" I asked, trying to break through the tension as he walks towards the window and leans back on the wall, crossing his arms over.
"I need to know the truth." His voice was still in a demanding tone like he used before to y/n.
"About what?"
"Just tell me it's fake, the thing between you too. And End everything with her right now."
With that been spilt out, the room went completely silent, as the ticking clock were the only thing audible to our ears.
Don't tell me he knows it? Does he know that it was fake?
"I can't do that, I..." hesitating my words I spilt out the truth lock-in within my heart, "I love her, and what makes you think it's fake, huh?"
Getting into deeper question I need to find out the reason for him to ask this question. No matter how I think about it, there is no way he could find out.
What is the thing I'm missing and what is the thing he is misunderstanding for?
Baekhyun was silent so I took the initiative to speak first as I swallow my nervousness and uncertainty.
"Do you...Do you love her?" Hesitantly I asked and waited for him to deny me badly.
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My heartthrob loudly at my rib case when the words left his mouth.
"Yes, I love her. I love her only as a brother and as a friend. I would never think of her anything that relates physically or sexually."
I cough hard when he finishes his words as l finally breathe in relief after holding up my breath for too long waiting for his answer.
"Then, what is the problem? Why do you think this is fake? Do you think I'm using her?"
"No, It's not you who I don't believe, it's y/n and her fascination. I don't know how she or you, seduce each other, but she's not something you think she is. She has the power to fascinate others. You don't have to do this, end things with her before it's too late. I know she's just using you."
Sorry to burse your bubbles Baekhyun but I do know what crazy thing she can do to get what she wants and my only mistake was underestimating her, and the result was; my heart got hinder away. I'm not backing off from here after what you did to her. Even if she means to use me, let her be.
"Y/n and I have grown up together. I know everything about her. You and she? That's absurd!"
"Why? Why can't she be with me? I don't think I leak anything to the reason that I can't be with her."
I asked, trying to find out the reason, why can't it be me, even it's supposed to be fake.
"Because she's using you to get me. I'm not dumb!"
"What if you are not? What if you are wrong? What if y/n really love me?"
Baekhyun scoffed at my words and start, "you know nothing about her past. Growing up with her, staying by her side when she lost her parents in an accident everything changed, even the things between us."
"Accident?"
I was caught off guard when the words came out. Furrowing my eyebrows at him I asked myself. There was an accident? I know she lost her parents at a young age but the accident part was new to me.
"After surviving alone, things got alot more harder for her. I just wanted to stay by her side to comfort her and I did, in every possible way I could. A shoulder to lean on and a lap to cry. let her believe that she still has someone beside her to care for. I have always stayed beside her and comforted her but, those comfort of mine to her was different. I didn't know that she'll..," He stops, hesitating to continue his words.
"She'll fall in love with you." The words just left me because I know he was going to say that and I completed his sentence for him as he looks at me, surprised.
"You knew?"
"We talked about once."
It's wasn't a lie or the truth either. Y/N has always talked about her love for Baekhyun so many time that She will always cry for him and for that, I couldn't help myself but start my hate for Baekhyun.
"And?"
I asked him, signalling him to continue.
"I have only loved her as a brother not more than that, I didn't know that she'll grow up with those feelings, feelings that I can't give back to her. She never confessed but I knew. I can never accept her that's why I played innocent. But then, Martin came into her life and y/n also wanted to change the thing between us that's why she agreed to their engagement but again, she was left alone. That jerk left her all alone, torturing her heart which was already broken by me. She was anticipating the moment the most cause that was going to change her life but didn't know that changed will be so awful." As he narrated their past, I notice that Baekhyun was starting to tear up, trying his best to hold his tears but slowly it flows down, touching his cheek.
"I don't know what she did to deserved those ill fates. Sharing this doesn't mean I truth you yoongi. You could do the same to her. I can never let her be with any man again. Y/n can not be happy with anyone, not even you."
He finishes his words in one breath as he gave me his serious look, looking so intimidating which was effectless on me. The anger in me was boiling again as those words left him. Let me just admit my words, I have never even trusted him with Jisoo too. All I did was for Jisoo.
Clinging my hand into a fist, I desire to punch him off the ground, but restricting my emotion I hold myself back but then...
"What right do you have to say that?"
My heart stops at her voice. Both of us turning at the direction, saw her standing at the door frame. When did she get here?
Most importantly how much she heard our conversation?
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