Thea

Zach's tongue slides into my mouth in a dirty kiss. I'm not a huge fan of PDA but everyone around us seems to be in their own world; drunk or dancing to the next high beat song that came on. I do however, still feel a pair of eyes on me and do my best to ignore it.

"Hey, I bumped into one of my old friends and just wanted to say hi" I respond after our kiss, feeling guilty for speaking to Devon.

But then I remember, why should I feel guilty? It's not like I'm doing anything wrong talking to an old friend. As much as I don't want to feel guilty, Zach has always made it a big deal for me about speaking to any guy who isn't on the lacrosse team.

It's not fair since he gets to speak to all the girls that come around his house or his games. The double standards in this relationship get's ridiculously frustrating.

"No problem, just wanted to show everyone that the hottest girl here is with me." With a grin on his face, I see his eyes quickly flash to where the basketball team is and I know enough that this was just a show for all of them.

It's been almost two years since we've been together and he still feels the need to show his possessiveness. This isn't the first time he's done this. Anytime he comes around to the gym and sees any of the Basketball team guys around, he'll purposefully be more touchy with me. I just wish he did this because he wanted to touch me, instead of making it some kind of game. It's not like I really speak to Quinn, Dev or Will anymore anyway.

The unsettling feeling I felt when I saw him speaking to the girl earlier, grows in my stomach. Great, I'm starting to question our relationship after all this time. In a club for that matter. I want us to work, he's my first and we've talked about a potential future, but when certain things like this come up it's hard to see myself with someone like this forever.

Am I a bad girlfriend for feeling like this? Will I constantly question his reaction to when I speak to guys? Will he be okay with me going out for a girl's night? He's showed his disdain for me going out with just the girls before, thinking that I flirt with a bunch of guys when I'm out.

Zach grabs my hand and gently pulls me to where I see Chase and one of his other teammates sitting. The guys are speaking to the blond girl that Zach was chatting with earlier and as Zach pulls me into his lap I notice that she gives me a dirty look.

I roll my eyes, I hate standoffish girls like this. Why can't we all just be nice to each other?

Zach nibbles on my neck just as I see the girls come back with some drinks in their hands. I see some of Sisi's art friends that must have joined us; laughing and dancing on their walk over to us too.

"Whiskey sour for you boo!" Kari says handing me the drink

"Thanks, I'll pay you back for everything in the morning" I say

***

The girls and I are dancing care free. The liquor that we've been drinking is giving me a fun drunk where I'm still aware of my surroundings but feeling loose.

I grab Sisi's hand and twirl our hands above us, our hips swaying to "No Hands" by Wacka Flocka while we're giggling. Colorful lights are flashing in the large room while a combination of everyone's body heat and my dancing is making me sweaty. Thank god it's semi dark or everyone will see how sweaty my face is. I'm sure my foundation has melted off by now.

Zach and his friends including the girl that tagged along with them (eye roll) left about 20 minutes ago allowing me to have more fun. I felt like a weight was lifted off my chest and I can do whatever I want without judgement now.

Whatever, this isn't my night anyway. It's Sisi's night and what matters most is that she gets the best 21st birthday. I'm not worried though, I think she got at least three more free shots from random guys who bought them for her after finding out it was her birthday and she looks like she's having the time of her life.

After a few more songs, Stella and I decide to get some water from the bar.

"Sienna is sloshed. Mission accomplished." Stella says bumping her cup of water with mine

"I'm happy she's having fun, I feel like I'm actually able to let loose too. It's been a stressful few weeks."

"Is everything with you okay? I haven't had the chance to talk to you because you've been out so much."

"Yep, I needed this night. I have so much crap going on, just happy that spring break is coming up." I respond, while I lean against the bar, pulling my hair away from my neck while airing my face with my opposite hand.

"Same, you're sticking around campus right? Wait, I just realized, I haven't seen Zach in a bit. Where is he?" She says, while searching the room for him

"Yeah, I want to make some extra money so I'm picking up some classes from a yoga studio off campus during break. And yeah, he left some time ago. He wanted to party with his friends back at his house." I roll my eyes

"He has an excuse for everything. Sorry you have to deal with this babe."

"It's okay, I'm kind of used to it by now as bad as it sounds. We're very...disconnected nowadays. I still have some feelings for him because we've been together for pretty long but they're just not as strong as they used to be. Somtimes I feel like I'm holding onto nothing." I say on a sigh

Stella grabs my hand, "You do what you think it's best for you. If you want to stay and stick things out to see where they go, do that. I know Kari is influencing you to see him in a bad light, not that I completely disagree with her but no one knows your relationship better than you do. You need to think about how he is as a boyfriend and if he treats you well. To be honest, I think you deserve better but who knows, maybe if you communicate with him he'll realize his mistakes?"

I grip her hand and give it a little shake, "Thank you Stells, I needed to hear that."

Relationships do take work. Maybe he'll be more considerate if I speak to him about it. I guess I can surprise him tonight at his place since I originally planned to go back home with the girls. I don't want this motivation that Stella put into me to disappear overnight.

I take a deep breath, tonight it is. Maybe tomorrow morning after I crash at his place since he might be asleep by the time I get there.

"Oh my god, don't turn around but Will and Quinn are walking up to the bar, right behind you!" Stella whispers into my ear

Shit, all the dancing and drinking made me completely forget about them. I forgot to mention that they're here too. The girls were kind of sad to not see Will, Quinn and Devon around anymore. Except for maybe Sisi.

Will and I were kind of the strings that held our little group together. We all kind of just lost touch with each other. I think Stella, Kari and Sisi get the feeling that Will is kind of a touchy subject for me so they try not to bring him up too often.

Once in a while they'll mention that they bumped into him but won't go into much detail. I'm sure they see him more often than they say they do.

I refuse to turn around and acknowledge him if he's close by. I just hate awkward moments, they make me cringe. No need to suffer through that when I can completely avoid the situation altogether. Just thinking about it is making me sober up slightly, the fog in my brain clearing up a little.

"Do not make eye contact with them or they'll feel obligated to come over and say hi." I say leaning close to her ear in a stern voice

"Too late, babe. They're already on their way over."

I let out an inward groan. Exactly what I don't need tonight. I hate confrontation.

I raise my hand to get the cute bartender's attention to order a shot. I'm gonna need it to soothe my nerves. I can already feel my palms getting sweaty and my heart rate picking up.

He drops two shots of tequila in front of me, along with a mojito so I feel a little refreshed after all the sweating I've been doing. This bill is not going to be cheap tonight.

I quickly scoot the other one to Stella and pick up mine, tapping it to hers and downing the José just as I see two big male frames in my peripheral vision. I totally should've ordered salt and lime but there was no time with their impending arrival.

I mentally gather myself together before turning to face them. Will stands closest to me while Quinn is on his other side next to Stella putting us into a little semi circle. I'm immediately assaulted with how large Will is and the scent of his pine scented cologne that he still seems to use. I almost wish he used something new to mark the end of our friendship and the new stages of our lives that we are at now.

I'm sure he's experienced his own fair share of bullshit that has matured him the way certain events have matured me over the past two years. Freshman Thea is way different from Junior Thea. Plus, we're all going to be Seniors in a matter of months, off to the next stages in our lives once we graduate. Just thinking about it gives me hives and I grimace then shiver.

"TT?" Stella asks trying to get my attention, waving her hand in my face

I see Will's mouth quirk up at the corner of my eye.

"Too much to drink?" Quinn asks teasingly

"Sorry, completely zoned out." I say sheepishly, although that shot and this mojito is helping me disaffiliate right now

Doing my best to act like this isn't awkward as fuck, I walk up to Quinn and give him a hug. I need to brace myself before greeting Will physically. I miss his hugs.

"Hey you, long time no see." I say to Quinn

I then turn to Will, my greeting slightly delayed but he makes up for the moment by pulling me into a genuine hug. Shocked, I wrap my arms around him, giving him a quick squeeze before stepping away. His big hands linger on my back for a moment longer and slide down towards my waist before pulling away.

Despite being slightly drunk, I feel the goosebumps that rise on my arms. Uh oh.

When I say he looks larger, I mean it. Basketball players aren't bulky but I can tell that Will's arms have a lot more muscle mass compared to when I first met him. God, he's gotten even more handsome. How does that even happen?

"Hey T, how have you been?" He asks, his pretty green eyes looking directly into mine and my nerves come back at full force