《Beautifully Invisible #Wattys2019》Chapter 24
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"For this."
Before I can ask the burning question that's been brewing in my mind the second he speaks those words, he presses his lips against mine in a soft kiss. My heart's beating a million miles per hour as my brain doesn't know what to think of this.
Am I actually kissing the Prince? I must be dreaming because this doesn't happen to a nobody like me. Never in a million years would I have thought that I'd be in this situation.
I then smack my over active brain for feeding me these negative thoughts that I've grown so used to. Now is not the time to be bringing myself down. Now is the time to embrace being embraced.
Without a second thought, I start to kiss back. It becomes more passionate as his hands grazing the back of my neck. I then drape my arms over his shoulders, eventually having my fingers entangled in his soft blonde hair. His hair is softer than I ever imagined, with the moon's light bouncing off of its shininess. I feel his fingers fidget with something that's tied under my hair... my shawl.
I stop for a split second as shock hits me. No one's ever seen me without it. I've always used it as protection from the outside world, from hurt, from the disgusted looks I get whenever I walk into a room. But with Fredrick, I feel like he won't judge me. He never has. If anyone were to see me for me, then I'd want him to be the one.
My shawl then falls to the floor, with my heart thumping like a drum.
He pulls apart as he stares at me in complete adoration. I've never had anyone look at me like that.
"You're so beautiful," He whispers as if he's out of breathe.
"You are too," I say without thinking.
He gives me a small chuckle at my response, as I take in what I just let escape my mouth.
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"Uh- handsome! I mean, you are beautiful... WAIT- I mean-"
At this point, Fredrick's eyebrow that's been arched my way is at ease as he quietly laughs. Goodness, that laugh makes me feel so warm inside.
"Sorry, I'm kind of new at this." I admit.
He presses his forehead against mine with a wide smile stretching across his face.
"You're so amazing." He says as he lowers his voice.
"You are too."
Which is why this hurts me so much. Right before he plants another kiss, I whisper,
"We can't do this, Fredrick."
"What do you mean?" He asks as he searches my eyes for an answer.
"Fredrick, you're getting married in two days, which is another reminder... That I can't have you. No matter how many confessions we make or how much love is between us, we will never be able to be together."
Before my vision begins to blur with the inevitable tears of pain, I can see his vibrant green eyes become glossy and vulnerable. His voice becomes uneasy with hurt glazing his mannerisms.
"I know, Lily... I know,"
Balling our eyes out, I bury my face in his comforting chest, as his own fits in the crook of my neck. His hands gently hold my waist, as my arms are hugged tightly around him.
"Lily! Where are you?"
I hear Vicky's voice call from down the hall. Shoot, I completely forgot that she wanted to talk with me later tonight! It seems to be very urgent, because she's frantically looking for me. I pull myself apart from Fredrick, seeing his fresh tears staining his face.
"Fredrick,"
I try to swallow the golf ball forming in my throat that's not allowing me speak the words I want to say. Seeing him hurt like this, hurts me beyond belief.
"Please don't cry- I hate seeing you sad."
He gives me a weak smile, uttering
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"I'll stop when you're happy."
"But, I am happy!" I say, trying to convince that I truly am... happy.
"No, you're not. I know you're not. I won't stop hurting if I know that you're hurting."
"Lily!" I hear again.
"I need to go, Fredrick. If I don't see you until you're married, then I just want to tell you that I'm happy, as long as you are. As long as I get to see that bright smile of yours, then that is all the happiness in the world for me."
Before he can answer, I go onto my tiptoes and reach my hands to his neck. I pull myself up until his lips crash onto mine. I put all the passion I can into this last kiss. His surprised face becomes relaxed as we stand there. His arms curl around my hips, making me never want to leave this perfect moment. The kiss ends as quick as it started as I pull myself apart once more. With one more longing look at him, I unravel my arms and run to Vicky, leaving a stunned Fredrick behind.
Once I gain some distance, I abruptly stop as I catch up with my rapid heart rate and breathing.
"Lily! There you are! Are you alright?"
I immediately run into Vicky's arms, embracing her tightly. She's always been there for me, and I'm immensely grateful for her. She hugs back, as though she knows that I'm not okay.
Afterwards, she said that she needed to speak with me about something very important. But, not out in the open. She brings me to my room, because no one usually walks by there. Vicky lights my tall white candle on the rusted silver candle holder, bringing it closer to where we are.
"I should've told you this a long time ago. But, they told me not to tell you until the right time came. Well my dear Lily, now is the time. Especially now that you're friends with the Prince."
"Uh, what do you mean?" I ask as I try to mask the panic that I feel in my chest.
Did she see us kissing? How long has she known?
"Earlier in the kitchen today, I saw the way you two interacted with each other. It's like you've been speaking for a decent amount of time. I saw a side of you that I thought I'd never see. Which is another reason why I need to speak with you."
Feeling defeated, I keep my mouth shut.... until I remind myself of something I've been wrestling with ever since I saw it.
"Vicky, before you continue, I need to ask you about something that's been interrupting my thoughts recently."
Vicky's expression is attentive, listening to every word I have to say.
"So, one night, Fredrick and I were talking with each other and he wanted to show me a secret room that's on the other side of the castle that he likes to visit. Inside were wood carvings, with most of them being carvings of a woman and hearts. The one that really got to me was the woman pregnant, holding her stomach. He even carved the baby inside the woman."
I smile at the sweet carving, thinking back to when I first saw it.
"Ever since then, I haven't been able to think about anything else. She keeps popping into my head, making me feel emotions that I've never felt before."
Vicky appears to be emotionless at first, looking at me with a strange expression.
"Do you perhaps know who made those carvings?"
She lets out a small chuckle, before speaking.
"Of course I do."
I lean in closer, excited that I am finally going to get the answers I've been waiting for two weeks to be answered.
"Your father made them"
~Love
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