Women like you drown oceans.

—

✵

Him

"If there's one thing in the kingdom I want, it's her."

"You know marrying her like this is against the rules?"

"I can bend all rules for her."

"It's for your own sake, not hers."

He looks at his friend and smiles. The small room they're sitting in is lit by a few candles, the flickers of which are reflected by his gleaming eyes.

"If she wasn't the reason, I would've listened-- reconsidered. But there's no rethinking when it's Noura. My decision won't change."

The man in front of him chuckles before humming, as if understanding his struggle. "I owe you a lot, even besides my life. I don't think I can ever pay the debt of your favors upon me. But if you ever need me, you know you'll always find me by your side."

"I know." He looks out through the small window to his right from which faint morning light has begun to shine in. He has little more time to spare. "You've been a brother to me, no less. I, too, owe you a lot."

"Sometimes, our choices can impact not only us but those around us too," his friend advices. "There can be unlikely consequences to them which might last forever. So before you haste, think of a hundred ways your decision can go wrong, and a solution to each."

And he smirks at the suggestion. "Oh, I have."

Her

The gray clouds overcast the sky heavily in large pieces and float to merge and split with the sun rays highlighting their boundaries. The mood they present is naturally gloomy and every once in a while thunder roars in the distance, preceded by lightning. The rain isn't falling yet but is soon to come. She watches the changing hues of weather from the pergola, sipping tea with princess Maysoon.

"I was planning on going to the bazar today, but looks like I'll have to delay the plan," Noura says as she puts down her tea cup on the table.

"Ah, you need something?" Maysoon asks. "I can send someone to fetch it for you."

"No, I need to meet someone."

The princess raises an interested eyebrow. "At the bazar?"

"It's someone I know," Noura excuses, not comfortable with confiding into her yet. "But with all the guards Eskander has left behind, it's difficult for me."

"You don't want Eskander to know?"

"He worries too much."

"Understandably. You're his only sister."

Noura gives her a tight lipped smile, as always the association leaving a sour taste in her mouth. How many people does she need to explain their relationship to? No one might understand her reasons.

"I can help," Maysoon suggests with a smile of her own. "I can send my guards with you, whenever you need to go. I'll make Eskander's men stay behind so no one will find out."

Noura gives her a grateful look. "You will do that for me?"

"Of course." She reaches out to pat the back of her hand before retreating. "You're a friend, Nour."

"Thank you, amira."

"You're welcome." She picks up a treat from the plate. "Is it someone from back home?"

"He's someone from my childhood."

"He?" Maysoon tilts her head, a playfully grin adorning her face. "So it's a man."

Noura clears her throat nervously. "Yes."

"Mind if I ask something, if you'll be honest with me?"

"Ask away."

She leans forward, lowering her voice. "Is he a lover, perhaps?" she inquires forthrightly.

Noura lets out an awkward cough and steals away her gaze from her. "Of course not."

"I only asked because you didn't want your brother to find out about it." She chuckles lightly. "But even if he was a lover, your secret would've been safe with me."

"He isn't," Noura stresses.

"Uh huh, I'll believe you if you say so," she continues in the same teasing manner and Noura cannot help laughing softly at her.

She looks at her as she takes a bite of her treat and motions for Noura to try them too. She smiles, feeling blissful in this one instant for if there's anyone she can still share a happy moment with and rely on, Maysoon is that one person for her-- a friend more than a princess.

Later that day Ameer Zakariya sends a messenger to her for a meeting. She isn't informed what it is about but that it's important. So she takes Hafez with her and they go to see the Ameer. When she arrives at his chamber, she finds him busy studying and stamping some papers.

"Noura, please take a seat, I'm about done with these." He hands the papers to a man and dismisses him before standing up and coming to where she has now taken a seat at the table. He sits opposite to her. "How are you doing at the palace so far?"

"Fine, I suppose."

He nods back in response. She notices him holding a sheet in his hand which he extends towards her. "I've called you here today to tell you that there's something the caliph desires, and he hopes you'll be able to give him what he wants."

With a perplexed expression, she stares at the grand vizier. But somewhere a faraway echo of her gut warns her of an impending danger.

"What can I possibly give the caliph?" she questions. "I don't know him. I've only heard rumors of him which I don't know are true or not. Who is Al Shafay? What does he want from me?"

Zakariya sighs wearily as if doing something he's unwilling to but doesn't have a choice. "I understand your concerns. But unfortunately I cannot answer your queries yet. Though there's a way if you really want to know."

She knits her brows, curious. "What?"

"The Khalifa is a riddle unsolved, and those who have ever solved it and known him haven't lived long enough to let anyone else know the answer. He is the man everyone talks about but few have ever seen. Rumors go that he has concealed himself as a commoner to protect the throne, but if anyone finds out his true identity, he kills them to keep his secret. Only his most trusted people know him, and he hopes you'll be one of them."

"What do you mean?"

"The Khalifa wants to marry you, Noura. You'll be his Malika."

She feels something deep within her bosom clenching, then cracking, not knowing if in horror or anguish. She feels as if a catastrophe that has been waiting to happen has finally brought her the much expected doom.

He fancied her, she learnt. He plotted to bring her from her home to the palace. But a man with a title and no name, no face, who has only limited people he trusts and so far hasn't taken any women as his queen for the fear of his identity being exposed, suddenly wants to marry her?

For the life of her, she neither appreciate why nor she can agree.

"Marry Al Shafay?" She takes a deep breath to calm her nerves. "I cannot. I've no desire of becoming a queen." She stands up abruptly. "Please Ameer, I request you, I just want to return to my home."

Zakariya stands up too and Noura desperately begs him with her eyes. He gives her a sympathetic look and shakes his head, holding up the paper to her.

"This is the order, Noura. I don't have a say in this, and you don't have a choice."

Her head starts spinning. She tries to say something but nothing comes out of her mouth as she gawks at the vizier. Within a few minutes, and in just a few words, he has crumbled her world.

"He cannot force me into a marriage," she protest. "I'm not his slave. I'm a free woman. I have a choice-- a say in this." Her hands begin to shake and she fists them. "I've a home. The caliph unlawfully took me away from it. I've a right to reject him-- he can't take that away from me."

"He does as he please," Zakariya puts an end to her protests. "I've tried to reason with him but despite my best efforts he won't agree. Not just for your sake, but for his own wellbeing too, this is neither the right time nor the right decision-- given the current public affairs to be considered first and the circumstances under which you were brought here which make it all the more unfavorable. But he wouldn't listen to reason." He puts the paper on the table and gazes at her. "I don't know what is it about you, who are you to him, but he's ready to take every risk and sacrifice everything just for this one wish: to marry you."

At first, she feels miserable. Then, she feels furious. Whether to call the caliph insane or not doesn't matter. He might be moon-struck or the wittiest man in the kingdom, she doesn't care less. What she knows is that she won't dance on his fingers like the rest of the puppets he's used to.

So she lifts her chin and announces defiantly, "Well then, tell the Khalifa if I'm a prize to him he hopes to win, he has lost already."

With that, she leaves the chamber and asks Hafez to take her to Fereydun. He's the only person who'll side with her-- someone Eskander had assured her she can go to in times of need. But after asking around she learns that he's not at the palace at the moment. So she returns to her chamber dejectedly and with a heavy heart.

She lies down on her bed and stares at the ceiling absently. Fereydun certainly has bigger matters to deal with. How can she tangle him in her own mess? Besides, what's the most he can do against the caliph? Appeal to reconsider his decision? If Ameer Zakariya couldn't convince him, how will Fereydun do so?

All these thoughts form knots in her belly. She feels so helpless and lonely. There's no one else she can go to-- not even Eskander who's lands apart. Her mother who's in distant home. The solitude starts clawing at her mind and these bottling up emotions push through as tears. She sniffs and clenches shut her eyes.

There's no despair for those who believe in the mercy of God. Listen, after every dusk is dawn. Even the darkest of nights are illuminated by some light.

She gets up from the bed and goes out on her balcony.

The sun. The moon. The stars. Do you see the signs of your Lord? How they float around in space at His command. Something for the day. Something for the night. You're never alone.

The sky has blackened and the clouds loom overhead, hiding the celestial bodies. The rain is falling now in a faint drizzle that kisses her skin when the wind pushes it towards her, mingling with her tears. But despite the darkness of the night, the lightening streaks the sky every little while later, like a feeble glimmer of hope comforting her.

You see sailors lost in the sea, and amidst storm who do they call to? Then who is it that brings them back towards safe land?

She listens to the thunder as it shakes the universe, as if enraged, and then the drizzling turn into heavy rainfall.

And there's hope in the rain for those who have been deprived of it, but eventually the mercy of their Lord finds them when they turn to Him.

She lifts her face towards the sky, letting the droplets hit her and wash away her tears, leaning forward on the handrail.

So you see, Noura, there's a hope for joy after every pain. Nothing lasts forever, but the might of God. So when you're suffering and you're seeking relief, ask Him. He'll guide you.

She touches the pendant over her breastbone, recalling her father's words.

There's always a way, so don't give up. Don't bow your head to anyone besides the eternal and absolute Lord. You're my brave daughter-- you're my light.

"There must be a way," she mumbles, her eyes searching around as if looking for answers. "Rabbi (my Lord), what do I do?"

For long she just keeps standing in the rain until she's soaked to the bones. And then as if puzzle pieces falling into place, an idea forms in her head.

Noura doesn't wait to reflect upon it or contemplate about the consequences of her actions as she rushes out of her chamber.

"Hafez, where is Adam?"

And just like that, she's once more striding towards his room, completing disregarding the matters that escalated between them in the past or the villainy of her plan for him. She knows if there's one man who can twist things to her advantage, it's Adam. And acting upon Eskander's advice, she rests her conscience to save herself this once. Adam will have to compromise to her terms or things might turn ugly for him. After all, she did learn something about him which she can use against him.

After what she witnessed that night between him and the queen, Noura had quietly left without uttering a word to anyone. She didn't run into him again, until now when a need has come.

She reaches his room and asks Hafez to wait for her outside. Taking a moment at the door to make sure there's no conversation at the other side and he's alone, unlike last time, she knocks at the entrance.

It takes Adam a few second to answer the door. When their eyes meet, he frowns before his expression goes wooden.

"What do you want?" he asks passively, his gaze swiftly swapping over her to take in her soaked form before colliding with her orbs again.

"Can I come in first?"

He stares at her and she stares back, standing her ground, though her heart has already started going berserk in her chest. After a minute of tension, he finally steps aside to let her in.

Noura walks inside his room which is simple but vast-- mostly empty except for the items of need. Though like him, the space feels dark and dense.

She hears him come behind her and she turns around. He walks past her towards a table where arrows lie scattered; he starts arranging them.

"How is your back?" she attempts to start the conversation decently before getting to the difficult part.

"Splendid," he retorts sarcastically and she bites her tongue. "Although I don't think you're here to ask me of your artwork."

"I'm here to apologize for it."

He halts and cranes his neck towards her, his lips pulling up in mockery. "How so considerate of you. I wish if you'd have shown the same consideration before doing the damage."

She glances away uneasily. "You threatened me. And need I remind you that not once?"

He walks back up to her and she straightens in attention. Adam stops a foot away from her and narrows his eyes.

"Now, sayidati, I cannot be fooled twice by this innocence, for now I know you aren't such an angel. So how about we cut the formalities and get straight to the point: what do you want from me?"

Noura sucks in her cheeks, searching for the right words, then giving up and smiling at him-- the unholy kind of smile. Why waste time with idle talk? There's nothing right with the wicked and demons, so she might as well do it their way.

"I need your help, Adam, and refusing me isn't an option."

✵

✵