Haydn didn't call or text back for the rest of Saturday and the whole of Sunday, which I could understand because her mom just passed away and she was obviously in shock and needed time to process it. But, when I rocked up to school on Monday and she wasn't there and none of her friends heard from her since the party, I started to get worried.

"Earth to Cris!" Roxanne called, snapping her fingers as I came back to the present, sitting with my friends on the stands as they got ready for their combined practice. "Did you hear a word we said?" She asked concerned and I shook my head.

"Sorry, I was distracted." I shrugged and Logan frowned at me.

"Yeah, we noticed. You've been like this the whole day, are you okay?" She asked and I nodded, unable to stress them about my problems with Haydn again.

"Yeah, I'm fine, just tired," I said, hopefully convincingly.

"Does this have anything to do with Haydn not being at school today?" Blanca asked and I winced slightly at her name because after everything we'd been through and our amazing night together it still felt as though she didn't trust me.

"Blanca! Shut up." Roxanne seethed through clenched teeth as I shook my head.

"No, it doesn't- I've just got a lot on my mind." I shrugged as I glanced at my watch, deciding it was late enough to go see stop by at Haydn's house. "I've actually got to go now, but I'll talk to you guys later," I promised as they eyed me carefully.

Thankfully before they could question me the coach blew their whistle, summoning the cheerleaders and the dancers to the middle of the gym. I took it as my queue to leave and stood up, already thinking of what I could say to Haydn when I saw her.

"Call us if you need anything," Logan said reassuringly as the three of them squeezed me in a group hug before running off.

I was grateful for the friends I had but I just couldn't tell them what was happening yet, not when I was still processing it myself and barely knew what was happening. Increasing my normal pace, I hurried to my car and drove straight to Haydns house, my mind a complete mess as I parked on the street and walked up. My heart beat rapidly in my chest as I rubbed my sweaty palms on my pants before I knocked.

I heard a commotion behind the door before Luis answered.

"Hi, Cristina." He greeted with a smile, but it didn't quite reach his eyes.

"Hi, Luis. Is Haydn here?" I asked politely and he shook his head solemnly.

"Um, sorry Cristina, like I told Jamal- Haydn isn't up for seeing anyone today." He explained and I sighed deeply, my heartbreaking when I caught a glimpse of tattooed skin through the crack.

"Oh, well, can you just tell her I stopped by to see how she's feeling and to call me when she can, there's something I need to tell her?" I asked and his eyes quickly glanced to the side before back at me.

"Don't worry, I'll pass on the message." He said, moving to close the door and I felt my sadness increase.

"Bye Luis and thanks," I said with a small smile before stepping away from their house and walking back to my car with my heart in my hands.

I wasn't trying to be selfish with everything that Haydn was going through, but she didn't make sense, one minute she tells me she loves me and now she doesn't even want to see me- what could've changed so suddenly.

Cristina, maybe she just needs space from everything- just give her time. Let's just go get her a birthday gift to take her mind off things so you can finally show her that you love her. I thought to myself as I climbed into my car before driving to the closest mall I could think of.

I quickly parked my car and stuck in my AirPods before I tackled the busy shops- the music drowning out the noise and calming my heightened anxiety, but what also helped was the thoughts of Haydn, all the good ones, that bombarded my mind as I wondered what to get her. The truth was there was nothing that existed that could show her the extent of my feelings and I'd probably die trying to find it, but I had enough savings to get her something every girl wanted- jewelry.

It took a few minutes of googling before I found a reasonable jewelry store that did engravings and made my way over. I had a very corny idea and if any of my friends knew what I was about to do they would probably roast me, but I wanted to give Haydn a constant reminder of my feelings.

"Good afternoon, how may I help you?" A friendly old man greeted as I walked into his shop.

"Hey, I was wondering if you would be able to engrave a chain for me today?" I asked nervously, relief washing over me when he agreed happily.

Together, me and George, the jeweler, decided on a classic, gold bar chain and when he gave me the paper to write down what I wanted to be engraved, I blushed. On the front of the chain, in roman numerals, I wanted to get the date of our first date- the night in the greenhouse- and on the back "I love you -Cristina".

Corny, I know, but you do romantic things for the people you love.

"What a lucky guy." George smiled as he read my sheet and I blushed.

"It's actually for my girlfriend," I explained, and he nodded gently.

"What a lucky girl." He smiled and I shrugged.

"I'm the lucky one." I corrected as I paid for the chain and his services, and he promised I could come back for the chain in a few hours.

After walking around the mall and having bought her a Brent Faiyaz hoodie and car socks, I still felt as though I was missing something- until I felt my phone vibrate with a text from Roxanne.

hey girl, i completely forgot to send this to you the other night. i hope you're okay.

Attached to her message was a picture of me and Haydn from the night of the party that I didn't even know she took, and I felt myself smile. It was a picture of us on the dance floor, her hands were on my waist and my arms were wrapped around her neck and the way we were looking at each other, you could practically see the love in our eyes- especially by the smiles on our faces.

I immediately called Roxanne as another idea came to mind and I walked towards a photoshop so I could print the picture she sent me, as well as the selfie Haydn took of us at the pizza place. She was grinning into the camera as I kissed her cheek, we looked really happy in both of them, and I thought that with how sad she'd been feeling this might be a good thing to see.

"Hey girl," Roxanne answered, sounding as though she was in her car.

"Hey, how was practice?" I asked and she groaned.

"Exhausting! I'm starving and both my parents are working late." She vented. "But what's up?"

"Nothing much, I'm at the mall getting Haydn a birthday present. I actually just wanted to say thanks for the picture, I had no idea you even took it."

"Cris, the sky could've been falling, and you guys wouldn't have noticed." She joked as I rolled my eyes. "But how's the shopping going?" She asked and I smiled as an underwear store caught my eye and I quickly ducked inside.

"Great actually, but there's one thing I need your help with," I said biting my cheek as I started to browse through the racks. "Would you be able to come to my house later and take a few pictures of me?"

"Will you feed me?" She asked jokingly and I rolled my eyes.

"Of course, my mom is cooking tonight." I grinned and she groaned.

"Ugh, I love your moms cooking so of course, I'll help. Just tell me when."

"Cool, I'll text you when I'm leaving." I smiled as a red set caught my eye.

"See you later." She said before she put down the phone.

I was happy Roxanne could help because I wanted to take polaroid nudes for Haydn's wallet, and she was the best person for the job. The red set was incredibly sexy with lace and long wrap-around ribbons that could be styled differently, I was obsessed- even if I did blush a little when I had to pay for it.

After my impromptu shopping decision, it didn't take long to get the pictures printed and find frames to put them in. My gift to Haydn was extremely personal and thought out and I only hoped it would make her feel a little happier and feel less lonely than how she was feeling right now. Before I left, I bought a black box to put everything in before I went back to George to collect the chain, which came out better than expected and soon I found myself on my way home.

* * *

"Okay, bite your finger and look up at me a little." Roxanne directed as I followed her orders, trying my best to look as sexy as I could as she took the last picture, the flash slightly blinding me.

"Did you get it?" I asked and she grinned as she showed me all three pictures. "Thank you so much, Roxanne, these are so hot. I'm just glad I get to take this off now." I smiled as I gently pulled off the fake lashes Roxanne insisted, I wore.

"Ugh you look so could, Haydn is probably going to die when she sees them." She smiled as I got dressed in sweatpants and a hoodie.

"Well, that's the reaction I'm hoping for, especially with everything that's going on." I sighed as I threw myself onto the bed, Roxanne crawling closer.

"What's going on girl?" She asked gently as I fiddled with the drawstrings of my pants.

"Haydn's mom died recently," I admitted, relieved to finally get it off my chest. "And she's completely shut down and shut me out, I don't even know if she's okay," I murmured. "It's just like every time something bad happens she distances herself from me, even when it does her more harm than good and I'm trying really hard to give her, her space and help her at the same time but I dunno. It feels like she's holding her breath and I'm just scared she's going to suffocate. Maybe she doesn't trust me."

"Woah, that's intense."

"Yeah, I know."

"Hey, I wouldn't take it so personally. It sounds like Haydn was raised in a very different environment than you, maybe she was forced to conceal her emotions, not let anyone in. She might not be used to opening up the way you want her to but that speaks a lot to her as a person- not you or your relationship." Roxanne pointed out, quickly calming the voices in my mind.

"Damn, when did you get so wise?" I asked jokingly and she rolled her eyes.

"Maybe I just know people." She shrugged before she smirked. "But it's nice to know you think I'm the smartest person ever." She joked and I laughed.

"I don't remember saying that."

"Yeah, but you were thinking it." She winked before she stood up. "Come on, let's go downstairs, I'm starving and the longer we stay up here the longer you overthink." She said as she pulled me up, dragging me to the kitchen.

And as we walked down the stairs, I couldn't help but think that maybe she was the smartest person I knew after all.