《parties // billie eilish》Chapter 90: A Bad Day

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''Are you alright?'' Travis asks me, almost making me chuckle. He is the one laying in a hospital bed and he still cares about if I'm okay.

''Yeah I am, why?'' I say, making him look at me in a knowing way.

''If there's one thing I've learned by hanging out with you is that I can tell exactly when something is bothering you. You don't have to tell me if you don't want to, but I'm here for you.''

''Thank you. It's okay. Billie is just being weird, but it'll be fine,'' I shrug. I don't want to talk about me in a way because this is about Travis, not me but in another way, talking about me will distract him from thinking about his pain. I hope so, at least.

''What happened?'' He asks immediately and I sigh before answering.

''Honestly, I don't know. She's just being annoying and-''

*call from Billie*

"Now she's calling," Travis chuckles.

"I don't give a fuck," I say before declining her call.

"Drama," Travis whispers, making me chuckle slightly. "No but seriously, you should talk to her about it."

"No, I wanna talk to you. This isn't about my fucking love problems," I sigh before smiling. "So, how did your family react? You don't have to answer, I understand if it's hard to-"

"It's fine," he chuckles, but I can sense a bit of sadness in his dark brown orbs. "They were mad. Or, my dad was really mad but my mom managed to calm him down."

''Yeah, but I don't think that they're mad at you. They are probably just scared and mad at themselves for not stopping it,'' i mumble, stroking my thumb over his bruised knuckles.

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''True. It's not their fault though, it's my fault,'' he says with a sad chuckle.

''No,'' I immediatey outburst, making him jump from my sudden tone change. ''Sorry. I just don't want you to blame yourself. It's the last thing that you should do right now, Travis.''

He nods and looks at me for a while. Suddenly, his lips start shaking and he lets out a sob, making me gasp before pulling him into my embrace. He rests his head on my chest and my hands find their way to his head, playing with his hair to calm him down.

''Schhh, it's okay,'' I whisper.

''I'm so fucking scared,'' he lets out, his voice cracking.

''I know.''

''I don't want to die anymore, but I'm scared to live,'' he says quitly after a while, making my heart drop. I feel how the tears are trying to make their way out from my eyes and I try my best to not start crying. After taking a deep breath, I place a gentle kiss on his forehead.

''I'm here. If you're ever scared, I'm here. I won't ever leave you again, I promise,'' I sob out, shaking my head for being so stupid to leave him hurting.

''It's not your fault Ember.''

''I could've stopped it. I'm sorry. I promise that I will make it up to you-''

Out of the blue, the door opens up, making me and Travis turn our heads to the door. There stands Billie, staring at our tear stained faces.

''I'm so sorry,'' she lets out, leaving me confused as I don't understand if he's talking to me or Travis. She approaches the hospital bed and walks over to the other side of it, wrapping her arms around Travis while resting her chin on his head as he hugs her back. I try to make eye contact with her, but her gaze is avoiding mine, making me furrow my eyebrows.

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''I love you, Travis,'' she mumbles, barely audiable.

''I love you, too.''

After a while, Billie pulls away and sits down onto a plastic chair on the other side of the hospital bed so that we are on either side of Travis. It feels incredibly awkward because I can tell that Billie is mad at me. I want to ask her what her problem is and why she's acting like a dickhead, but I don't want to create drama when Travis is here like this.

''Okay, I ain't no couples therapist, but I can tell that y'all are having some problems and I'm more than glad to help you,'' Travis says, breaking the silence.

''There's nothing to talk about,'' Billie says immedaitely, making me raise my eyebrows.

''Clearly, there is.''

''I said there's nothing to talk about-'' Billie says again before starting sobbing from nowhere. She buries her face in her hands, making me jump up from my chair and walking over to her. I crouch down in front of her and grab her hands, feeling how tense they are.

''What's going on?'' I ask with furrowed eyebrows.

''I'm sorry,'' she says. ''I don't know what's going on with me today. I feel so weird and empty.''

''It's okay,'' me and Travis say at the same time, making me smile lightly while looking at him. ''It's okay.''

After a while, Billie starts feeling better and the three of us start talking about funnier things, like Rosa being annoying. In the middle of the conversation, I feel Billie's warm hand grabbing mine, intertwining our fingers. I crack a smile and lean my head on her shoulder. I don't think that she's mad at me anymore, and that gives me one less thing to worry about today.

Suddenly, we realise that it's late and that Finneas will be furious when we get home. Apparently, he had told Billie to get home earl and her dumbass forgot about that.

''I'll go home tomorrow,'' Travis says, making me grin.

''Finally. I look forward to hanging out with you again,'' I say.

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