24th Jan, 2022

Writer.

O'clock at night.

As noiselessly as possible, Yazan gripped the doorknob and swung the door open, slowly set his foot in their deemed bedroom and locked the door behind, sighing in exhaustion.

He was abrubtly welcomed with low whimpers and muffled sobs, that concluded his excitement of surprising his wife with an early return.

In a jolt, Yazan rushed to the bed and hovered over her, began whispering sweet nothings as his lips came in contact with her sweaty neck.

She kept snivelling more, tightly clutching his shirt to seek for calmness though not in full sense to know he's in here.

"Sayba...hey...hushh..."

Yazan caressed her back and abdomen with both his hands, assuming her cramps being the reason to this breakdown.

"She..disgus..gusts mmm..ee"

Painfully muttering, Sayba balled her trembling figure, her words tensing him up.

"Love..who? Wake up come on."

He lifted her face to kiss her tearful face.

Then swiftly shifted her on top of him and pulled the comforter over themselves, enfolding her body firmly that soon helped her to lessen shuddering.

"Is it painin...no no...Sayba what's wrong? Tell me?"

It then hit him that it's not how she reacts to the last day of her period.

"Mumma...don't..lea..leave me."

While she talked a lot of more broken sentences in her half consciousness, Yazan slipped his hand inside her clothe and massaged her chest, feeling it's beating organ a mess in sufferance.

Though she was unaware of his presence and her own cries, when she finally met with peace and let herself off the pain, her sensed regained.

She tradily unclosed her eyes and headed up, her nostrils filling in with his cologne.

"Zan.."

She grabbed his nape immediately digging in there, he remained silent, stroking her hair in affection while she soothed her wounds in his embrace.

But in no way she could get rid of the spiteful words of her MIL while the only reason for her to enter the war field was to impress her, in return, it earned her disrespect and humiliation.

"Done, my crybaby?"

Yazan teased, humming in her ear.

Sayba immediately backed off minding the endearment.

She turned the lamplight on and sat up.

"Do you really feel I fool you through crying?"

Frowning in disappointment at herself, she inquired, causing Yazan chuckle at the sudden outburst.

"No way, you weaken me through that, love..."

Yazan pulled her hand, frowning back.

"Zan I missed you...I miss Mumma..a lot."

She settled back in his lap, straddling him.

"Who disgusts you Sayba? Did Mom scold you again?"

"None, not that. Thanks for coming back."

"Never mind, sleep for now."

••••

"Mom for Allah's sake, she skipped dinner just to not face you. You were so wro..."

"I'll be happier if she doesn't show up in the morning either."

She cut Aaiza off and walked to the washroom, leaving both of her daughters stunned at such cruelty.

Just at that time Yazan halted on his foot from stepping in the room listening to the words while he came to let them know of his arrival.

"What did she say to Sayba?"

Yazan gritted his teeth, his jaw clenching in fury as he entered in.

"You..are back? Bhabi called you back?"

"Is she even fine? She had locked herself the wh..."

"I. Asked. What. Did. Mom. Say. To. Her?"

"Bhabi slipped the whole oil bottle in the kitchen and Mumma scolded..a bit out of limit."

"Words Aaina...what exactly?"

Yazan already began to feel guilty, hurt and sympathised for his crying wife who was almost traumatised an hour back.

"Her mom shouldn't have died before teaching her house chores and all..."

She lowly informed, awakening Yazan's temperature so much that he kicked the tea table hard shouting for his mother.

"MOM, OUT NOW."

"Yazan Mirza lower your voice."

She returned, the exact expression displayed on her face like that of her son's.

"SHE IS MY WIFE."

"AND SHE IS A COWARD TO ALWAYS COMPLAIN YOU OF YOUR MOTHER. Allah Allah! She even called you back for that."

"She didn't. She didn't say a word to me, I overheard you and I came back uninformed, okay?"

"Come on Yazan I can't stand your girl even fo..."

"She's an orphan Mumma...she's just 19."

Yazan lowered his tone, almost to an whispering level, rage ceasing from his face.

The words he stated left no affect on his mother, she just looked away not feeling an ounce of regret for the encounter.

"All the while she was only trying to take your attention, but you loathe her like she's someone from hell."

"Then she shouldn't come in my kitchen when she knows she's only a troublemaker, she can't even cook the basics."

Yazan no longer felt angry, it's as if his whole body weakened, his heart heaving at the insult of his wife.

"With which sense you said her mother should've died later..."

"Because she.."

"My sisters never made a cup of coffee for themselves.

Shall I say die after you teach them all the things?"

As much as he hated to say these words to her, he needed to defense his wife much more.

His mother stared at him shocked. She didn't feel guilty yet, but learnt the toxicity of the words she dropped on a mother's daughter.

"My girl has suffered ever since she learnt the meaning of life...not anymore Maa. Please, I beg you. If you can't stand my wife then just feel pity for her as an orphan."

Yazan gasped pleading.

She said nothing in response, feeling no other emotion than beyond hurt for her son's complaints.

Gulping in, as Yazan noticed her dull face, he advanced towards her and embraced her to a hug.

"I love you Mom...I love her a lot too. But I see no lacking from her side, please give her a chance, please?"

Ruffling her hair affectionately, he requested and waited for her reply, that she didn't make, so he backed off and left.

Just as he opened the door of his bedroom calling for Sayba, she stepped out of the closet dressed in only a white oversized shirt of his, her not-so-long wet hair fallen behind.

"I just had a bath, periods over. Make love to me?"

It was more demanding than being a question.

Yazan grabbed her hand and sat on the couch, settling her in his lap.

"It's a no?"

Sayba rolled her eyes, causing him laugh at her before he regained his seriousness.

"I'm genuinely sorry for what my mother said. And I...I'm...promising you that if she does that again, I'll...."

"Yazan...nooo! It's ok. I don't mind. She'll gradually start liking me, I promise."

Sayba stated the words cutting him off, her fingers brushing his beard as he blankly stared at her.

"And don't interfere between us. I will really hate even a tiny scratch in your relationship with her caused by me."

Yazan's lips twitched up to a warm smile as she spoke.

"Hmm...I love you."

He grabbed her legs and encircled them around him before folding his arms around her.

"I love you. Can..can you teach me cooking? One hour in the weekends will do, please?"

"No Sayba you don't need to learn any rubbish for anyone's sake."

"Zan! That's no rubbish. I need to."

"I can cook, sweetheart!

"I can't make you cook for me for the rest of my life."

"We'll just order from outside."

"Ohh if only you don't end up bankrupted at the end."

"Then water and dates will do for me, as long as you're along."

••••

"GET THE HELL OUT OF MY SIGHT, I'LL CEASE YOUR CAREER AND EXISTENCE, JUST LEAVE!"

Yazan came running to the floor where he heard Iffaz screaming at a Doctor, his voice so harsh unlike usual.

"Faazi...what's wrong?"

"YOU FIRE HER RIGHT NOW OR I....DAMN IT."

He threw the file away he had in his hands, sinking to the floor on his knees with a thud, tears deliberately oozing down his eyes.

Yazan looked at the surgeon he was yelling at, seeking for elaboration of the scene.

"The baby wasn't supplied with enough oxygen and...without waiting for the reports I operated Doctor Sawda an..and....made a mistake."

She guiltily stated.

Yazan gulped down in fear.

"How..how's Sawda?"

"Fine...her baby die..died."

"RUBBISH YOU COULDN'T SAVE MY BABY FOR YOUR IGNORANCE."

Iffaz shouted crawling near the ceiling, pulling his hair frustration, his agonised heart bleeding at the loss.

"You may go, Doctor. I'll see him."

When she left, Yazan quietly sat beside Iffaz, not knowing how to console him.

His eyes moisturised seeing him cry endlessly.

"She's...there, look."

Iffaz mumbled pointing his finger to a crib in the room, continuous sobs escaping his lips.

Yazan gripped his shivering hand and pulled his head to his chest that he comfortably settled in and wept.

"Our..baby..I lost her."

"I might never get another..Yazan."

He looked up at Yazan, sharing his helplessness.

Yazan could feel it, the agonizing fate, the unprivileged right.

"I'm..sorry."

"I..I miss her..it might be hurting my wife so much more than me...how will I live with it."

"Doctor Sawda's calling for you, sir."

Iffaz shook his head hiding his face in Yazan's embrace at the call.

"Faazi go..get up."

Yazan lowly said pulling away from the hug, he wiped his tears and gave a warm smile.

"It'll heal."

Iffaz hardly managed to stand up and go inside while he, rested his back against the wall near the room's door.

"Iffaz, I don't feel her anymore."

Yazan heard Sawda complaining in tears, that abruptly sent shiver down his spin knowing the intense pain.

"I'm sorry love...she had to leave."

"Yazan! Aapi is okay? The baby."

Sayba panicked running to his way. She was going to open the door when Yazan gripped her wrist pulling her down.

"Zan don't cry..."

"We..we need to have a talk, love."

Yazan's lips quivered as he stated gazing at her with blurry visoin, his tears freely flowing down his eyes.

"Is it important now? Let me meet her for once please."

She cupped his face wiping his tears trying to stand up.

"Please Sayba..come with me."

Yazan stood up grabbing her hand, as if he's running off time he ran to his chamber with her.

"What's wrong Yazan?"

Yazan sat on the couch with her. His muscular body trembling, scaring her to the core.

"Zan...is it about their baby?"

"No..no."

"Then? Don't cry...calm down Yazan, please."

Yazan nodded his head and sucked in a sharp breathe before meeting her eyes looking up.

"I want to say something."

"Yes?"

"I'm infertile..I ca-can't be a father...Sayba, I can't give you babies."

••••

Going good?