Italics

I couldn't help but run.

Do you blame me?

I didn't know my feelings. I never experienced love except from my parents and Lily. I was never taught these things. I was never taught how to love, what to respond with, and what people do when they are in love. I just watched sappy kids movies about love. My heart was racing. I was running down the hallways.

I almost crashed into carts and medical supplies, I almost ran into nurses and doctors, and I almost tripped myself. But, I didn't. I just let my legs carry my own body out of the hospital.

My head was pounding. All the thoughts running through my mind, hitting and bumping the insides of my own skull. I just wanted it to be like old times where I was with my parents.

I want to be raised better, so Anthony doesn't have to be with a person that knows nothing about love. I want to grow up, graduate from high school, go into college, and get a degree, but it seems like every single one of that isn't within arms reach. I can't stand, because I'm still trapped in what I call, my quarantine bubble.

I'm chained down from the past, and can never break out. Anthony doesn't deserve someone like me. I ran out of the building and ended up in the spot where I was stargazing with Anthony. Instead of Anthony, it was Luke.

Luke was leaning on a tree, smoking a cigarette in between his fingers. He was a breath taking sight. Not only was his figure handsome, the background was too. Even if it was in the day, you can see the city behind him full of people. His gaze was on the city. He blanked out for sure, because he wasn't blinking.

He simply took an inhale and blew out the smoke. I can smell it from the doors of the building. I couldn't help, but approach him. I needed to apologize anyway. Anthony can wait, I just need to make up with my best friend.

I walked up to him slowly, not making a sound. He was still staring at the city blank. I ended up behind him and I crouched down to look at the city. It was alive. It didn't look like that years ago.

I turned to look at his face. He was staring at me. Luke stared at me, but instead of a smile, it was a scowl. He looked like he was going to beat me up any minute now.

I stood up, not into his level. He was too tall for me to reach. I tilted my chin upwards and met his emotionless, gray eyes.

Luke looked away and took an inhale of his cigarette before tossing it onto the ground and stepping on it to burn it out.

"Did you come here to say you're sorry? Don't bother," He huffed, smoke leaving his mouth and going into the air around us.

I fanned the smoke out of my face and saw his blank face.

"Look-"

"Don't fucking talk to me."

Luke stood up straight and started walking away. He didn't even bother talking to me. I ran up to him and grabbed his wrist with my hands.

"Please, don't go," I whimpered.

Tears starting falling out, streaming down my cheeks and onto my neck. I fell on my knees, hugging his wrist to my face as I was crying.

Suddenly, he cupped my cheek within his hand and looked at me straight in the eyes. His cold, gray eyes met mine.

"I will never leave you."