《Writer Room》Writing Conferences: How to Stay Sane

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Maybe you are a new writer, or you've been working on a book for a while and want to get more involved with the writing community. Maybe you've heard about Wattcon on Nov. 19 in Los Angeles and plan to attend that, or perhaps there's a conference closer to where you live.

I believe that writers are often introverts, and the idea of going to an in-person event, with other human beings, can be terrifying.

I know this is scary for me, and I've been a writer for a long time. I like my safe little cocoon in my house, with my dog and my computer and my coffee.

Conferences can be quite helpful for an author's career. You can meet other writers in your genre and come away energized with new ideas.

So I'm here to help. Think of this as a primer for your first writing conference! This week I'm at the NINC conference near my home in Florida, and I've come up with some thoughts about what you should know to have a successful time at a writing event:

1. Remember to bring a notebook or two and lots of pens. If you're a notebook collector like me, then this is your BIG MOMENT. Show off your cool notebooks! Compliment others on their notebooks! Writers often love fun pens and paper, so this is your time to shine. You also actually need to take notes during sessions, because you'll want to refer back to those notes later. Also, make sure to get any handouts.

2. Put your phone down. Try to focus on what the presenter is saying. Writing conferences are unique life events, and you want to get the full experience.

3. Look at the schedule beforehand, and make a tentative plan of the sessions you want to attend. Sometimes the conference will have an app, which makes it even easier. Set your phone or watch alarm to remind you of the upcoming sessions, because you might find yourself chatting away and lose track of time.

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4. Either attend with another writer friend, or make a new writer friend while there. Yes, you will feel awkward going up to a stranger at first, but trust me, the other person is feeling the same way and will be grateful that you took the initiative. It's often helpful to have someone you can hang out with, either in sessions or during the cocktail hours. During the conference I'm at this week, my writer friend Margaret and I are each other's Emotional Support Humans — we commiserate, complain, whine, gripe, critique and gossip among the two of us on our drive to and from the conference. This allows us to leave all the negative, fearful energy behind when we're actually at the con. It's also helpful if there are two good sessions happening at once — one person can attend one, you can attend the other, then swap notes.

5. Take breaks. Don't be afraid to skip a session if you're exhausted. Conferences can be tiring, and you can't expect to be ON all the time. If you're staying on site, there's no shame in going to your room for a siesta.

6. It's normal to be overwhelmed. Being around a lot of strangers, especially after a few years of a pandemic, can be emotionally, mentally, and physically stressful. Take it easy on yourself — you don't have to do it all! You can sit out some of the cocktail hours and sessions if you want. I figure that if I get one or two excellent tips or things to consider, it's a successful conference.

7. But don't close yourself off too much — plan ahead and think about who you want to meet while there. There are going to be successful authors at the conference, but remember, at one time they were JUST LIKE YOU — starting out. It's okay to introduce yourself just to say hello, tell them you enjoyed their session, or that you love their book. Don't be afraid to do this, because you might make a new friend or professional contact. That's what conferences are for!

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8. You will feel inadequate. This is TOTALLY NORMAL. I feel like I'm a fairly successful author, but just this week, I was talking to someone who casually mentioned she makes $70,000 a month. YIKES! She is way out of my league. But, that doesn't mean I don't belong at the same conference, it just means I'm at a different part of my journey.

9. Hydrate and eat. Conference rooms, especially those in hotels, can be dry. Stress also dehydrates us. Drinking a lot of alcohol during nighttime events also depletes us. Make sure you're drinking water and don't forget to bring a snack.

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