"Yeah, so...I wrote everything down...There's a sheet on the fridge...And my cell phone number is on there too, so...Feel free to call if you need anything..." Namjoon hesitated, feeling uncomfortable. The last time he'd called a sitter, he'd been going out to dinner with his wife. While she'd had a suitcase - packed - in her car. While she'd been about to tell him that she was leaving him.

So, he wasn't feeling great about the situation. "I think that's pretty much everything..." Namjoon mumbled, rubbing the back of his neck. "If you have any questions, Jin should be able to help with pretty much everything...And...what am I forgetting...?" Namjoon exhaled slowly, biting the inside of his cheek. "Oh, right. If...if Tae does anything weird...Tae's the one with the weird smile...so, if he does anything weird, just...ignore it, okay? He's fine. Or, at least, he's not...he's not not fine. Whatever." Namjoon sighed. "Just let Jin handle it. Or Yoongi, if they get out of control. If he's still awake. Just-"

"Daddy, we'll be fine so hurry up already!" Jin said, pouting and tugging at Namjoon's sleeve. "You're going to be late!"

Namjoon sighed again before smiling and ruffling Jin's hair. "All right, sweetie. I'll get going then." He looked back up at the babysitter, who looked a little perturbed but hadn't left yet, so Namjoon was assuming that she'd stay.

Which failed to give him an excuse to cancel his date.

"All right, kisses," Namjoon announced, crouching down so his face was low enough for his kids to reach.

Jin kissed Namjoon on the cheek, followed by Yoongi (reluctantly), Hobi (excited), Jimin (about to cry), Taehyung (looking mischievous), and Jungkook (who still looked a little shook about being short).

Namjoon was most worried about Jimin since Jimin had a bit of attachment anxiety, and he didn't do well with strangers. Namjoon was tempted to just take Jimin with him on the date, but he was pretty sure his date wouldn't be amused. And it would make it difficult if things...escalated. Not that Namjoon was planning on kissing her or anything, he barely knew her. But having a four-year-old staring at you while you stared at someone else was just a tad bit uncomfortable.

And Namjoon still felt delicate about the whole matter concerning their mother.

He hadn't felt right, accepting the invitation after their mother had left only a year ago, but...he knew that he had to move on at some point. If not to forget her, then to try to find his own happiness again. Although he felt fulfilled through his children, but giving them a kiss on the forehead wasn't the same as kissing a woman.

Mainly because of the absence of tongue.

"Now go, Daddy!" Jin said, pushing Namjoon toward the door, and Namjoon sighed for the third time before waving at the babysitter and leaving the house.

He got in his van, realizing that it wasn't the sweet ride most women dreamed of, but he was a single father with six children to raise. He had neither the budget nor the lack of efficiency to buy some hot sports care.

And besides, he liked owning a car that could fit his whole family at once.

***

Namjoon got to the restaurant fifteen minutes later. On most of the previous dates he'd had, mainly with the kids' mother, he would have picked up date up, but she'd just gotten off work, apparently, and had suggested that she meet him there.

Namjoon didn't know much about her with the exception of her name: Seulgi. In all honesty, she was a friend of one of the guys from work, and that same guy had set the two of them up.

Although Namjoon was about 98% sure that his friend hadn't mentioned to Seulgi that he had literally half a dozen children.

He didn't think that he'd bring it up tonight.

He walked in and inquired the hostess of his reservation.

"Your companion is already here," the hostess said with a smile, leading Namjoon over to a corner table, where a beautiful woman waited.

She stood up as Namjoon approached, even as he tried to tell her to stay seated.

"It's so nice to meet you," she said with a perfect smile.

Namjoon felt...sort of intimidated. Am I...nervous? What is this? I've gone on plenty of dates. I've done plenty of other stuff, besides, enough to have six kids...So why do I feel so anxious about this whole thing? It's just dinner.

Even if things do go better than expected, the babysitter is only staying until ten, so it's not like anything's going to happen tonight.

"The pleasure is mine," he said, hesitating before shaking her hand.

She looked surprised before laughing and sitting back down. Namjoon squeezed his eyes shut for a second, feeling incredibly awkward.

I was supposed to kiss her hand, wasn't I...

But it had been so long since Namjoon had done anything like this. He just felt so out of place without his gaggle of children causing problems or interrupting everything he tried to do.

He opened his eyes back up and sat down with a barely-withheld sigh. He picked up a menu, raising it to somewhat hide his face even as Seulgi attempted to make small talk.

"So, Jackson tells me that you're a big family man?" she asked, and Namjoon was startled into lowering his menu.

"Jackson?"

"Oh, sorry. Jackson is a friend of Mark's. I'm close with Jackson, Jackson's close with Mark, and...well, you know Mark. And now you know me."

"Right," Namjoon said, swallowing because his voice sounded tight and harsh to his own ears. He cleared his throat. "Sorry. I'm...I'm a bit out of practice. And, yeah, I guess you could say that. My family is very important to me."

Seulgi smiled sympathetically, and Namjoon almost felt his heart flutter at how gracious she was being about all of his awkwardness. "Jackson told me about your wife leaving and...gosh, that's really not something I should have brought up. I'm so sorry," she said just as the hostess returned.

"Any appetizers?" the hostess asked with a smile.

Namjoon quickly looked up. "No, thank you. Can we order now?" he asked, feeling an itch to hurry this impromptu dinner date along so he could return home and check on his kids.

Seulgi looked surprised again but he just gave her a thing smile.

The hostess nodded, polite as she was paid to be, and Namjoon quickly chose a random item off the menu.

"I'll have what he's having," Seulgi said, closing her menu and handing it to the hostess.

As the hostess walked away, Namjoon discreetly checked his phone.

"Somewhere else you'd rather be?" Seulgi asked with a slightly pained smile.

Namjoon shoved his phone back in his pocket. "No, sorry," he said, although it was somewhat true. "That was rude of me. It's just...a new babysitter. I was just checking on my kids. They're...well, they can be a handful."

Seulgi nodded, smiling, and she looked a bit relieved. "Jackson mentioned you have kids. How many? Two? Three?"

Namjoon swallowed, swirling his glass of water and listening for the clinking of the ice. "Something like that..."

They made small talk until the dinner arrived.

Over the course of the dinner, Namjoon discovered that:

a) Seulgi had been born in the same year as he had.

b) She liked Pringles. (She had talked about them for five minutes before getting embarrassed and quieting down.)

c) She was 162 cm compared to Namjoon's 180 cm.

d) She played guitar.

e) She was from Seoul.

f) She could speak Japanese.

She was funny, sweet, and generally pleasant to be around.

The hostess was just about to ask if they wanted dessert when Namjoon's phone rang.

"Is it about Taehyung?" was the first thing he asked, and after listening to the babysitter's response, he nodded, standing up. "I'm sorry, Seulgi, there's an issue. I had a really nice time," he said, trying to leave things on a good note, but he felt just as awkward as he had when he'd arrived.

"It's fine," she said, smiling as Namjoon left some money on the table. "I had a great time too. We should do it again sometime...if you're interested, I mean."

Namjoon hesitated, and Seulgi's face fell.

"Or not. Right. I'm sorry...I'm being a bit too presumptuous," she murmured before getting to her feet, swinging her purse on her shoulder and forcing a smile. "Thanks for dinner," she said, not meeting his eyes as she walked toward the exit in high heels.

Namjoon thought about stopping her, about telling her that she was lovely and cute and everything he liked in a woman, but then he was reminded of the phone call he'd just gotten.

Should he get the girl?

Or go rescue his babysitter from whatever Tae had done this time?

With a sigh, Namjoon headed to his car, the space shuttle as the kids had taken to calling it.

He had all of his life to find someone to fill the hole in his heart.

He only had so many years to raise his children.

And maybe, even though he'd tried to pretend that he was cool about the whole thing, maybe he just wasn't ready. Not just yet.

***

"I'm so sorry," Namjoon apologized yet again as the babysitter hurried out the door with an extra twenty in her pocket. After the door had shut, Namjoon turned around to face his children with a sigh, placing his hands on his hips, and Jin mimicked his position.

"Really, Tae? You decided to hide the whole night to scare the babysitter into thinking that you'd run away or been kidnapped or who even knows what?"

Tae looked up guilty, trying to make an apologetic expression, but then his lips spread in a sneaky smile.

Namjoon just sighed, shutting his eyes and rubbing his forehead before opening his eyes and dropping his hands back to his side. "I bet you're pretty hungry now since you didn't get to eat, right?"

Tae grinned, knowing that he'd been forgiven, and Namjoon couldn't help but smile back.

He was a little sad about letting Seulgi down, but he was pretty sure he'd made the right decision.