《Sunlight Through The Curtains》Erikson's Theory of Psychosocial Development
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"I was right though, she's down here." Andrew said before he lead them around a corner.
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The group follows Andrew, Sam and Bucky closest behind. Bucky tried to take a breath to calm down. They were so close. Please he begged to no one in particular. His breath caught and he put a hand up to his neck, subtlety feeling for his pulse. His heart was beating. Fast. He panicked as he felt blood rush to his ears, making the echoey hallway sound muffled. He could hear each step. Two people weren't in sync with the rest of the group. Step, step, stepstepstep.. step, step... too loud. He could feel the blood pumping under his fingers. It's too fast. He can't panic right now. Not when he's so close.
He flinched when Sam placed a firm hand on his metal shoulder. "Jamie" he whispered. He moved his hand across Bucky's back to his other shoulder, loosely wrapping his arm around him. Sam's hand made it's way under Bucky's, which was still against his own pulse.
Sam felt it for himself, his fingers resting on the side of Bucky's neck, and holy fuck. Bucky's heart was fast. If Bucky weren't a super soldier, Sam would have been tempted to rush him to a hospital somewhere in France. Bucky's eyes were closed as the group continued to walk down the hall.
Sam looked around and saw a maintenance closet. That was as much privacy as they were gonna get. "Guys," Sam said quietly, "give us a second. Like no more than a minute I promise." He reassured the group, meeting their worried eyes. Meg nodded and Sam pulled Bucky, who was barley able to process any of that information, to the open door of the maintenance closet.
Sam knew Bucky would be embarrassed later but it's not safe for him to be on a mission, especially in a Hydra facility, while having a panic attack.
Sam shut the door behind them. It was dark and cramped but that was fine. Sam gently grabbed Bucky's face, then moved his hands to run them through Bucky's hair. "We can do this, okay?" Sam whispered. Bucky leaned forward with a shaky breath and fully pressed his lips to Sams. "We need to keep moving, are you gonna be okay?" Sam asked, still holding on to Bucky. His hands rubbed at Bucky's jaw.
Bucky nodded, "Yeah, let's keep moving. Thank you." Sam kissed him on the forehead before walking out of the maintenance closet.
"Okay lead the way- what are you laughing at Danny?" Sam sighed knowingly.
Danny tried and failed to get rid of his smile, "Sorry," he laughed again, "you just- you- came out of the closet."
Sam smiled with a scoff and Bucky let out a quiet laugh, trying to bite back his own smile. John rolled his eyes, smiling nonetheless "Let's go, she's waiting for us."
Panic aside, the group was feeling ready. So ready to finally complete this mission, take Marie home, and try to give her a bit of the life she always deserved.
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"This room. I did some scouting while we were looking for the other scientists, she's in here. In cryo." Andrew continued to lead them through the door.
They all had to take a breath when they saw her. A collective sigh of relief.
She was sleeping, looking almost peaceful. The cryo chamber was laying horizontally on a metal table. The glass in front of her face was frosted over and there were small crystals resting on her lashes. She was so small. The cryo chamber was half the size of Bucky's old one. She looked just like Bucky remembered her. So brave even in the worst circumstances.
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Louie closed the metal door behind them. "We need to be careful about this." She fumbled with the lock on the door till it clicked. No one should follow them seeing as no one knew where they were. Locking the door was more to keep Marie in while they calm her down and get her to leave with them. It could be dangerous locking themselves in a room with a small super soldier, but they didn't have much of a choice. They didn't want her escaping again.
"First of all, take off the Hydra uniforms. The sooner we can get her trust, the better." Louie said while beginning to take her own uniform off. They were all instructed to wear normal clothes underneath in case of this very circumstance.
"We have some time and we know she's safe in cryo, so let's talk before we do this." She motioned for them to sit on the floor, indicating that this could take a while to work through.
Louie took a breath, "Erik Erikson's theory: the Stages of Psychosocial Development. Eight stages occurring throughout one's life. Beginning with Trust vs. Mistrust, ages 0-1. Marie definitely didn't pass that stage while in the hands of Hydra, so it's safe to assume she won't be quick to trust, though that was an obvious.
"Stage two, Autonomy vs. Shame and Doubt; ages 2-3. This is when children should learn that they have some control over their life and bodies, such as when they are being potty trained. Being shamed for accidents of any kind can lead to a child not passing this stage. Marie definitely did not pass this stage. She may assume she has no choice, meaning she might go willingly. This is something we will work through with her later."
Louie's breathing got a bit shaky; it hurts knowing Marie was so mistreated. Meg reached a hand out and sat a bit closer to Louie. Louie squeezed Meg's hand, "Stage three, Initiative vs. Guilt. Ages 3-6. Similar to stage two, she will more than likely have no confidence in her ability to fight back. But this doesn't mean she can't physically fight.
"The stage she is currently in is stage four: Industry vs. Inferiority, ages 6-12. It will be hard for her to work through this stage seeing as she didn't have a choice in what she was told were "accomplishments." Marie was never able to do anything for herself. We will have to be patient, and she might be apprehensive when presented with a choice. Our best bet is to be gentle, and, as much as I don't want to, we can't give her a choice.
"As soon as we're out of here and safe at the compound where Meg and I will live," Louie looked over to Sam and Bucky who nodded. They decided that Louie and Meg would move in to help as soon as Bucky told her about Marie. "that's when we work on giving her choices. We will talk about that more when we're all safe.
"And-" Louie stopped short, "there's always a chance that Marie will recognize Bucky. We can only hope, but if she does, that will hopefully instill a sense of trust in her. We will need to be calm and gentle. Don't tell her to make any decisions, even when we're on the jet." Louie concluded.
Meg nodded, "Alright, do not use the ICERS on Marie, we're still not sure if they're lethal, nor do we know how long they last. If the guards and scientists are conscious by the time we leave this room, our only priority is getting Marie out. Once we know Marie is safe on the jet, make your way out of the facility if you didn't get out before then. The quieter we are, the better.
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"John and Andrew, you two work on the cryo chamber but warn us before opening it up. Everyone else help secure the room. Make sure she can't get out of here till we want her to. We don't know if she is of her own mind, or completely influenced by Hydra at this time. Expect anything." They stood up and the rest of the team followed.
The two scientists turned around to face Marie. Her chamber was sealed so tight, the scientists couldn't tell where it opened from just by looking at it. They glanced at one another, then started working in sync, running their hands along the chamber to feel for the seal.
"Here" John said softly once his fingers found the slightly indented line. Just barely noticeable. Andrew brought his hand over to Johns, so he could find the seal too.
The boys slid their hands in opposite directions, following the line around the egg shaped chamber.
Their fingers ran along the metal at Marie's side, then over her knees and back down. The boy's hands met again at the curve behind the small girls head.
John sat on the ground, looking for a keypad of some sort. He could see the edge of it but the rest was blocked by the table. "Andrew," John called in a whisper, as though he didn't want to wake the frozen child above him as impossible as that would be. "Could you push her my way?" John turned to look around the room and spotted Sam who was standing by Bucky. The rest of the group had done as much as they could to secure the room and were watching the scientists work. "You guys make sure she doesn't fall okay?"
The team nodded. Danny, Sam, and Louie went to one side of the girl, while Bucky and Meg stood at the other.
"I'm gonna push on three, keep her steady." Andrew placed his hands at the end of the chamber, "One. Two.. Three!" He shoved the metal chamber forward on the table.
"Good. Stop." John said once the keypad was revealed. The team, minus John and Andrew, stayed at her side, holding the chamber up so it wouldn't tip and fall onto John.
Andrew sat beside John and watched the other man crane his neck and lie on his elbows to investigate the keypad. Andrew tapped Johns elbow and shuffled under his head; letting John lie against his lap, which propped him up and allowed him to use his hands to work with the chamber. There were loads of buttons and a 10 digit password that would need to be entered. That wouldn't do. "Andrew could you pass me that scrap metal?" John asked, having found a screw but no screwdriver. A random piece of metal would have to work.
Andrew leaned back and grabbed a small piece nearby. "Thanks," John said, using the metal to unscrew the keypad from its base. From here it was a simple red wire, blue wire situation, but without the bomb (hopefully). "I'm ready when you are." John said to the group.
"We're ready." Louie replied.
John used the metal to slice at a wire and the seal broke with a hiss. Icy vapors leaked from the edge, filling the room with a chill.
The team moved the chamber back onto the table completely. They stood with baited breath till they looked up at the soft sound of Marie's slow breathing. Louie nudged Bucky forward. He should be the first one she sees.
Bucky approached Marie nervously. Would she remember him at all? He kept a safe distance in case she decided to come out fighting, but when she blinked her eyes open there was nothing. No reaction. She didn't even look at Bucky. She just stared blankly at the ceiling.
Bucky wanted to curse at himself, obviously she won't move until she's given orders. He turned to Louie. He wanted to ask Marie the question. Do you want to play a game, Marie?
Louie read the look in his eyes like she was reading a book. He wanted to give her a choice. He wanted to ask her the question. She nodded nonetheless, if anything was worth breaking her ground rules, it was this.
Bucky took a breath, looking at Marie. He didn't know how to ask the question but he had to try. "Мари," (Marie,) his voice was soft but rough with fear. The falter in her otherwise rhythmic breathing was the only sign that she had heard him. Bucky felt his face start to burn with hope and worry. He swallowed, "Смотри на меня. пожалуйста." (Look at me. Please.)
Bucky let out a breath of relief when she slowly turned her head, a flicker of recognition in her eyes before they dimmed once more. "Ты помнишь?" (Do you remember?) "Это Баки" (It's Bucky) His eyes began to well with tears. Her eyes flickered again at the name.
She was trying so hard to remember. She could feel it. She knew him. She knew him. It was right there. All the memories felt like they were clouded by a dense fog. Like she had to squint to see her own hand in front of her face.
"Вы хотите сыграть в игру, Мари?" (Do you want to play a game, Marie?) He practically whispered the words but she heard him no less. The fog seemed to blink in and out of existence before clearing almost entirely.
The look in her eyes was back, but this time it stayed. "Это игра на память, не так ли?" (It's a remembering game, isn't it?) She asked quietly. So quietly Bucky almost mistook it for the sound of his own breathing.
The tears in his eyes fell and he shuddered a breath, "Да- да это так, вы правы" (yes- yes it is, you're right) he practically sobbed the words, a huge smile growing on his face. He reached out to touch her before taking his hand back and looking toward Louie. He wanted to give her another choice.
She nodded and Bucky couldn't help but notice the tears in her eyes and in the eyes of the rest of the team for that matter. He looked to Sam who smiled and gave him another encouraging nod.
He turned back to Marie, who was giving him a tired but curious look. "Мои друзья помогли мне найти тебя. Обещаю, мы можем им доверять." (My friends helped me find you. We can trust them, I promise.) Bucky explained softly. "Мы можем вытащить тебя отсюда?" (Can we get you out of here?) The small girl closed her eyes and nodded ever so slightly.
Bucky carefully reached into the chamber to grab onto Marie. He gently lifted her out and began to set her on the floor when he realized she wasn't letting go. She held onto him and let out the smallest sniffle before freezing, "Мне жаль. Мне не следует плакать, извини." (I'm sorry. I shouldn't cry, I'm sorry)
Bucky almost let out another sob before stopping himself, "Ничего страшного, Мари, я плачу, понимаешь? У тебя нет проблем." (It's okay, Marie, I'm crying too, see? You're not in trouble.) He held her tight to his chest and brought them both down to sit on the floor.
She continued to hold onto him, with all of her super soldier strength and Bucky did the same. He sat with her in his lap and rubbed her back till their quiet sobs slowed to hiccups.
Bucky pulled back enough to see the child's face. He delicately brushed the hair from her face and wiped the tears from her eyes. "Давай сядем в самолет, тогда я познакомлю тебя с моими друзьями, а?" (Let's get to the plane, then I'll introduce you to my friends, yeah?)
Marie took another breath and nodded.
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