Just as my eyes start to close,I hear the loud door Creek open. I look up and see him. He's holding a large bag. His massive body walks over to me and looks down at my shivering body. He unlocks the chain and tosses me the bag. As I look through the bag,I find some warm clothes,food,and water. I change into warmer clothes and move over to where he had thrown my saved up food. The food is almost all gone. Probably the rats.

He actually unlocked the chain. I'm not confined to the pole anymore. I head to the corner and huddle into the metal. He's not going to let me go. He's trying to get me to behave better. I haven't seen real light in months. I haven't seen Tobias in months. I hope he's okay. He always blames himself. It's not his fault and he doesn't understand. I feel like I'm going insane. I'm practically trapped in my own mental prison.

"Hello Tris." I hear him say and I look up. "Hello Eric." I reply and look right back down. His voice is deep and cracky. I need to leave. I have to. He does it again and leaves. Tris you need to fight him. You have to. It's your only way out.

I'm not strong enough. Everyday,I get less food. It's probably getting harder to smuggle. I need to survive. Some of my scars have started to fade. Not enough though. I wish they were gone. People look at me like I have two heads. I might as well. Tobias always looked at me like I was strong. Even when I wasn't. I need to do it. For him. It's going to be hard to fight Eric. If I fail he will hurt my friends. I can't fail. I need to win. For them.

_----------------

It's been a long time. He hasn't brought me food in two days. I can barely move. My stomach is louder than my voice. He needs to bring water soon. As if he could hear me,the door opens. He throws food and water at me. This time it's a full burger. "Thank you" I croak. My throat is too dry and it hurt just to say that. He walks back out. He never just walks out. What's going on? Did someone find him? My adrenaline starts to pump. How long have I been here for? Maybe 10 months. I don't know. I can't tell the time or season. I just know that it's warm now.

When he took me it was a little hotter than this. I've been here for almost a year. The new initiates would be coming in a like 5 days ish. probably. Would he still train them? Is he okay? I'm done asking questions. I need to get out of here. Soon. I eat all of the food and save some water. My eyes droop shut as I think of a plan.

When I wake up I start to brainstorm again. How will I be able to overpower him. Metal. He never carries a weapon in here. To my knowledge. If I find some lose metal,I can use it as a knife. I get up and stumble around the walls, trying to peel off some metal. He normally comes a while from now,so I think I'm okay for now.

Fuck. There are no lose wall pieces. I should try the floor. I go the corner and find a loose piece. I try to peel it,but it's too strong. I've already used all my energy to find it and try to pull it. I need more food. I guzzle down the rest of my water before awaiting his arrival. It feels like hours before the door opens. I plead with my eyes for him to give the food and water to me.

He walks up toe and sits next to me. He presses his cracked lips to mine. His hand grasps the back of my head and deepen the kiss. I try to pull away,but remember what he can do to them. My friends. After a while goes by,he finally pulls away. He exits the room and I get the shivers. I feel so gross. I feel awful. This just makes me want to hurt him even more.

I eat the food and water until there is none left of either. Then,I go back to the metal. It's very tight,but I have a strong will. As I pull,my arms get tired. "For Tobias. For Christina. For Uriah. For Zeke." I say to keep myself going. Finally,it come off. I feel like jumping up and down,but I'm too weak. It's quite large though. How can I hide it? I will send it into knife size and hide it in my pocket. I start to breathe heavily. I did it. I can do it. I will leave. I will see To is again.