09/01/2017

Kristin didn't exactly sleep as peacefully as the night before. Whatever the reason was-- though she secretly knew it was the two- story separation, and possibly the previous argument-- she fell victim to those same dreadful nightmares.

The worse thing about it was that she knew she was dreaming, yet she could never wake up. She was always stuck in her horrible dreams.

She was in a dark, cold room. She tried to look around her for something-- anything, but it was pitch black. Not the darkness you see when you turn off a light and you have to wait for your eyes to adjust, either. It was the darkest darkness she's ever been in, and it gave her a very uneasy feeling.

For some reason she knew someone was watching her. She could feel a pair of eyes on her, yet she didn't know where they were.

The feeling in itself terrified her and she heard herself hyperventilating.

That was another thing.

So far, she had had enough of these nightmares to figure out what always happened.

There was darkness, the feeling of being trapped with no escape. The feeling of something evil watching you but you can't see it. Then there was the dead bodies that would always haunt her.

She would feel the same things; tightness in her chest, making her struggle for breath. The overwhelming feeling of anxiously awaiting the evil thing that was secretly watching her. The paralyzingly feeling of fear once she knew it was coming for her. And then, of course, as if this wasn't bad enough, the most horrible feeling would hit her where she couldn't breathe.

No matter how hard she tried, she couldn't get the oxygen into her lungs. Instead she would start to hyperventilate, and struggle for breath, basically waiting to die, before she would wake herself up with either her screams, or her crying.

Damn, that's right.

Kristin didn't know how and why she was so affected by what she had gone through to give her the most unimaginable terrifying night terrors she'd get almost every night-- sometimes more.

Maybe it was actually her fault? Maybe she was bringing these unto herself as a coping mechanism to deal with her secret guilt. Or maybe she was designed differently, her chemical makeup out of control after witnessing death so close. Whatever the reason, she would torture herself with these questions, feeling responsible for her own nightmares.

And the worse thing was, no one really knew how she felt. What she would go through, what she would see in her nightmares, what she would hear.

That was what was going through Kristin's head every single night.

So when she was shaken awake she was gasping for air, tears streaming down her face.

Kristin immediately sat up, scooting towards the other side of the bed.

She was too afraid to look at Ryder, to see his reaction. Sure, he had seen a glimpse of her night terrors when she had briefly taken that nap in his office.

She knew this was one hundred times worse.

"Kristin, it's okay, you're awake now," she heard his voice beside her.

She put her head in her hands, trying to steady her breathing so she wouldn't start sobbing.

She hated the feeling she would get when she woke up. Even if she couldn't remember the details of her dreams, she was always left with the overwhelming feelings of guilt, fear, anxiety, and a sense of something coming for her-- even when she was awake.

"Kristin, look at me," Ryder scooted closer to her, the concern in his voice audible.

She kept her head down, her hands covering her face. She didn't want him to see her like this. Why did he have to come wake her up? Now he would think she was crazy.

"Kristin," he repeated, reaching over to pull her hands from her face.

"I'm fine," she whispered so he wouldn't hear her shaky voice.

"I wouldn't call this fine," he said, his eyebrows knitting together.

Kristin fought the urge to look up but she ended up looking at him anyway.

It was hard to tell since the room was dark but it looked like he was angry.

Of course he'd be angry. He found out something is seriously wrong with you!

"I'm sorry," she muttered, pulling her hands from his hold and wrapping them around her legs, bring her knees to her chest.

"You're apologizing..." he said slowly, confused.

She kept quiet, resting her forehead on top of her knees.

"Why the hell are you apologizing?" Ryder moved to kneel by her side.

She flinched at his tone, feeling tears threaten to fall again.

"Kristin," Ryder said in a softer voice, "Why are you acting like this is normal? You were screaming and--"

She didn't pick her head up at his silence and continued to sit quietly.

She heard him sigh, "Its fine, you don't have to talk about it. You can go back to sleep."

She slightly relaxed at hearing this.

When he didn't move she looked up at him.

"Come on, you need to get some actual sleep," he gave her an expectant look.

She gave him a weird look and laid back down so he'd leave. She knew she wouldn't be getting any real sleep but she wanted him to stop worrying.

When Ryder dropped to his side next to her she realized what he was doing.

"We aren't sleeping toge--"

"Would you just shut up Kristin?" Ryder cut her off, whispering, "You need to sleep and if that means I have to be here too, then that is what's going to happen."

"Ryd--"

"It's just sleeping Kristin! I'm not taking no for an answer."

"Stay on your side," she whispered with narrowed eyes before turning on her other side.

She thought she heard Ryder mumble something along the lines of, "Give me a break."

Ignoring the voice in her head that told her to move closer to her mate, she closed her eyes to act like she was going back to sleep.

If only it was that easy.

After a while, she found herself focusing on the soft breathing of Ryder beside her.

Her body was relaxing, and her eyes were getting heavy.

She slowly turned onto her back, glancing over at Ryder's sleeping form.

It had been almost an hour since he had told her to go to sleep. Surely he was in pretty deep sleep by now?

Kristin slowly scooted towards him, stopping to make sure he didn't wake up.

A few more seconds went by before she silently moved closer to him.

Once her arm brushed up against his own, she let out a silent breath and close her eyes.

She was delusional. She was going completely insane.

After a couple of minutes, Kristin was sound asleep.

•. •. •. •. •.

Chapter Thirty Five!

Thanks for reading.

Chica_2016