She only starts to notice her own behaviour when she received a phone call from her parents telling her of their blasted family reunion.

And the very first thing that comes out of her mind is to bring Lisa along.

Well, she did ask if she should bring Lisa with her, but maybe she asked it in a way that it seemed as a statement and not a question because then she finds herself going home to Anyang with Lisa.

She then finds herself loving the teasing Lisa throws during their first dinner with Jennie’s family.

She then finds herself blushing over simple, sweet things Lisa says about her in front of her parents.

She then finds herself stunned when Lisa tries that black dress for the reunion itself. So stunned that Lisa has to snap her out of her thoughts – asking her to zip the dress.

She then finds herself mesmerized how Lisa looks absolutely beautiful with the new hair colour she wanted.

Oh, how enthralling Lisa looked even more.

She then finds herself smiling idiotically when Lisa tells her how beautiful she looks with her new hair colour as well.

But Jennie thinks that Lisa’s more than stunning.

So beautiful she can’t help but smile as she says how more beautiful Lisa is.

Jennie starts to notice more changes in her behaviour – surprising her in more ways than it should.

Because then Jennie finds herself seething mad when Sehun constantly approaches Lisa, and with Lisa acknowledging him.

When all Jennie ever does is warn and tell Lisa to stay away from Sehun.

Why can’t Lisa just do what she’s told?!

Jennie then finds herself getting confused of what’s happening to herself. So confused that she blurts out that Lisa is a ‘school mate’ to her Auntie. Well, it’s somehow true, right?

She feels more confused when Lisa’s mood changes.

Why would Lisa even get mad – if she ever did – when they were still nothing?

Jennie knows they’re still nothing because Jennie keeps the walls she built.

And Jennie gets more confused when she apologizes to Lisa and admits that she herself is a jerk for yanking Lisa off Sehun that one time.

She gets more confused when she finds herself disgusted with the simple thought of Lisa and Sehun being together.

It doesn’t help when her own mother brings the topic out when Sehun was said to make Lisa a ‘real’ part of their family.

Jennie decides to rid off the stupid thoughts by having ordered Lisa a thousand times to stay with her.

Jennie tries to make it explicit – without her knowing why she even wanted to – how she still somehow owns Lisa in a way.

She starts to hold Lisa more closely, she starts to ask Lisa to feed her in front of her relatives, she starts to include Lisa in every discussion her family talks about.

And it doesn’t help because it confuses Jennie a whole lot more when Lisa decides to sleep with her on her bed that one time it was raining hard.

Jennie feels her heart thump along with the thunder until she’s not able to determine if her heart was still pounding because of the sound or if it’s because of Lisa’s warmth.

The worst confusion Jennie faced was that fateful outing.

That damned outing where her stupid cousin Sehun just can’t keep his hands to himself and decides to wrap it all over Lisa.

Poor, innocent Lisa who can’t say ‘no’ and who seems to like it.

Jennie grits her teeth every time it happens. Why would she even feel this way? Jennie’s not one to control her feelings well. So when Lisa reciprocates the same physical contact to Sehun, Jennie loses it. She was more than angry, she was more than wrathful.

More than wrathful because then Lisa just have to say that what Sehun and Lisa has – whatever it was – ‘has nothing to do’ with Jennie.

When Jennie hears that, she snaps even more.

So wrathful she managed to ignore Lisa the rest of the day.

But Lisa keeps on making her feel more and more perplexed because then Lisa corners her by the pool that night.

Eyes intensely staring at her – and only at her. Lips partly open – looking for words to say. Breathing heavy as the heat of the moment was at its peak.

Jennie’s not one to control her feelings well, so when Lisa apologizes and Jennie tries her best to push Lisa away, and when Lisa admits that the blonde does care about her. Stating things Lisa has done for Jennie, even as far as wanting Jennie’s whole family to like her. When Jennie hears this, she hugs Lisa. She can’t help but attach herself to Lisa. She reasons that she’s just a physical person, but she knows that this is too much.

Jennie feels stupid doing this kind of thing. This kind that she never even thought of doing to Lisa.

Lisa’s still apologizing, but Jennie fears that she won’t be able to reply anymore so she prompts Lisa to not speak anymore as she starts to lead the taller girl to a more isolated place.

Embarrassed that she’s letting herself do these things.

Jennie convinces herself that she’s just embarrassed – humiliated – of her actions, but then she confuses herself once more because she doesn’t know why her heart hammers against her chest when she suddenly commands, without thinking, that Lisa hug her. She confuses herself once more because she doesn’t know why she felt pissed off and irritated when Sehun starts to call for Lisa.

So pissed off that she shoos Lisa once more, spewing words of Lisa going to Sehun instead of being with her.

But yet again, Lisa knows how to play with words and with her heart.

For Lisa manages to smooth-talk her way in – in Jennie’s room and in Jennie’s heart.

For when Lisa has mindlessly asks why Jennie is so confusing, Jennie can’t help but smile back as she says, admits – confesses,

“Because you confuse me a whole lot more.”

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It doesn’t help when Jennie would catch Lisa staring at her.

Staring at her like Jennie’s the only one person that matters to Lisa, staring at her like Jennie’s the most fascinating person Lisa has set eyes upon.

Staring at her like Lisa’s in love with her.

It doesn’t help when Jennie decides to tell Lisa about it but was too scared to even say it.

So she ends up teasing Lisa instead, saying how Lisa looks at her like how a creep does.

She ends up teasing Lisa instead, saying – taunting – how Lisa might fall in love with her if the latter stares too much.

Leaving Jennie a bit more satisfied because then Lisa blushes and Jennie notices how Lisa was not even able to look at her any more after that.

Jennie turns to her sadistic side once more when she decides to tease Lisa again by lying down with the taller girl that night to sleep beside with.

But that teasing soon turns into tension quickly when Lisa suddenly turns to face her. For Lisa’s face was so close to hers.

So close that they can practically close any gap between them if they allowed their selves to.

So close that Jennie lost track how her heart has beat frantically fast, hoping Lisa hear none of it.

But Jennie is always quick to back whatever her feeling was, because then she teases Lisa again.

Saying – taunting once more – how Lisa might fall in love with her if Lisa stares too much.

But Jennie doesn’t trust her words. She doesn’t trust herself.

She’s the one who can’t hold their stares!

Jennie doesn’t want to admit that now, does she?

So she simply instructs – commands – Lisa to ‘keep her warm’, which Lisa obliges to.

Just so Jennie can stop looking at Lisa.

Just so she can close her eyes and lock herself in Lisa’s embrace.

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Jennie feels Lisa getting distant whenever her cousins gather in the living room, so Jennie tries her best to make Lisa feel as a part of her ‘family’.

Maybe she’s afraid Lisa might answer back how Sehun makes Lisa feel more at home than Jennie does again, so Jennie does all the smallest things to make Lisa feel in place with them – with her.

So Jennie frowns when Lisa agrees with Jennie’s statement of Lisa just wanting to stay because of Sehun.

Even if it was a joke, Jennie can’t help but scowl.

She can’t control whatever damned feelings she has that time anymore.

But those damned feelings were only strengthened when Lisa pulls her and says,

“I only want to spend time with you.”

And Jennie has never been more thankful that Lisa has pulled her close or else Lisa would tease her for blushing too much.