When I wake up again, I have Jose hugging my front and his head on my breasts and I smile a lazy smile.

"He wants to be the baby so bad." I hear a voice from next to us and I smile after I look up.

"Are you jealous, Sebastian?" I grin

"Oh, I'm back to Sebastian now?" he teases

"Ugh, I forgot, slave number 2."

He grins. "You never told us what the numbers mean."

"And I never will."

"Oh, come on, we've survived death together."

"No, slave number 2."

"I shouldn't have reminded you." He pouts.

The toilet flushing pulls me in the direction of the bathroom.

Mason emerges. He is freshly showered, and he has a towel around his waist. I frown a little because he's lost a little weight but fuck, he is still fine as ever.

"You're drooling, Hoshi." Leo says from behind me, and I hit his stomach.

Mason smirks.

"I mean, you can look, but no touching, even for you." Mason smirks as he leans in and kisses my forehead.

"Can't I, number 3?"

He groans as he straightens to his full length. "That still? And yeah, I'm saving myself for marriage."

"Yes. And I honestly just love the names now. They have a nice sound to them, they suit you. And marriage you say?" I grin

Jose stirs and I look down at him. I see his sad, but devastatingly beautiful face. it takes him a moment as tears well in his eyes. He just stares at me for a minute.

He touches my face like he can't believe it's me, that I'm really here. I let him touch me and tears also come to wet my face.

The mood drops as we move from playful to the sad. A sad I didn't want to think about at this moment. I know all of us won't have rest from our parents, especially the mothers wanting to know how we feel.

I wish we could just move on. Because remembering reminds me that it is on me. I always felt like my father betrayed our family and I hated the guys for betraying me but am I better? I also contributed to the mess, even though I didn't mean it and I brought my son into all that.

"We are so sorry for not protecting you, star. Please forgive us."

That tugs at my heart. I close my eyes. they are still so kind to me.

"It wasn't your fault. It was mine." I pull from him, and I sit up. I knit my fingers as shame and regret cloud me.

"I'm so sorry. I-I didn't mean anything I said, and they almost harmed peanut and, and--"

I am crushed in hard bodies as Jose and Leo hug the life out of me.

"No, star. It is all on us. We are your protectors, remember."

They all hurdle around me and we hug it out for minutes.

When we pull apart, I look at all of them before I breath out. "I guess we have a lot to talk about."

They all look a bit worried, but they nod. The mood is a bit low.

Low until Mason tries to get up and his towel slips and he has an erection.

"What the fuck, man!" Leo shouts.

We all burst out laughing.

"I mean why?!" Bas points at his erect dick.

Mason doesn't pick the towel. He struts his fine ass to his closet.

"You wish you looked like this, asshole." He throws the towel to Bas who throws it to us like its hot coals. I take it and I put it over my nose, and I sniff it and they all grimace. Mason winks at me before he disappears in his closet.

We shower in turns. Mason borrows me his clothes. Black sweatpants and a white t-shirt. Which is just as well, most of my clothes were starting to not fit. I need to go shopping or I'm not going to have anything to wear soon. Peanut is determined to turn me into a shopaholic. I will need to ask the guys to pass by the shops before we go back to school.

We are famished when we emerge. I can believe we've been asleep for almost 24 hours.

I take Leo's and Bas's hand as we head down for breakfast.

I know we have issues, but I know everything is passed. If the past week has showed me anything is what I want. I had a lot of time to think while I paced day in and out at that hell hole and I realized a few things. And I don't have time to deny myself what I want.

Being without them has only hurt me anyway. They fucked up but so did I. If there are any people I would bet on again, it's the Pentagon. So, I will take the chance again and I will choose us again.

I want us back. I want my family together. Us and peanut as a family.

We find Mason and Bas's mother in the stove with the other mothers chopping with aprons. We all hug, and they ask us how we are.

"We thought you were still going to sleep another 15 hours." Jose's mother says with a smile.

"Ugh, mom, don't tempt me." Jose says as he rubs his packs.

"Mama, I know I like pickles but a whole bowl is unnecessary." Leo complains as we sit.

His mother hits the back of his head and we all laugh.

"Ow!" Leo feigns hurt as he rubs the back of his head.

Mrs. S is the sassy one of the mothers. She is lowkey the funniest. The Asian mother with the quick wit and the blunt humor and even quicker hands.

"You are already looking like a twig, Tatsu, after starving yourself since Zuh dumped you." She says and we all laugh, hard.

"Ma!"

All the mothers move around, and they make everything ready.

'Alright, we will leave you kids to eat. We will come back a bit later. Your fathers want to talk to you when you finish." Jose's mother says as they all stand around the table.

The mood sours between us.

"Ok, listen. We know they are big dummies, but please..."

"Mom, no." Bas cuts his mom off before she finishes.

"Bassy, they are still—"

"No, mother. We almost lost—"

Jose grabs his hand and shakes his head. Bas rolls his eyes furiously. I hadn't seen it before, but the guys seem to be at odds with the fathers. I know they are their fathers, but it feels good knowing they are in solidarity with me. This whole shit show was because of that stupid idea they had in the first place, and I still don't know how to feel about it.

The mothers leave and they use the front door. They must be going to the city. The women always have errands.

We start eating in silence.

I am mostly in my head thinking about us. Everything we've been through. All the bullshit.

I may love them, and I want to try again but I feel like we need a dedicated conversation, and we need to lay all our truths on the table, and I want all their truth and their word this time. me and peanut deserve better.

I don't know how to broach the topic of us. I feel like they are all still tip toeing around me, and they are scared of what I'll say or do. I know I will need to lead the conversation. I don't like how everything is hanging in the air unsolved.

The leading questions being: can I trust them?

Have they changed?

Are we all better people?

Can I trust them with peanut?

Are we ready?

"Is your morning sickness over?" Jose takes me out of my head.

"For now. And I hope it doesn't come back."

"I hope it comes back." Mason says wistfully and I hit his arm.

"Do you know how painful that thing is number 3?" I narrow my eyes at him.

Their faces fall a little. "It does?"

"How can we help when you have it?" Leo asks

I smile. Leo is such a practical person, a hands-on kinda guy.

"Hold my hair and not think I'm less sexy as I barf on your pillow?"

They chuckle.

"Wait, when are we going back to our names?" Mason asks with a wide grin

"Not anytime soon. you haven't earned those back yet." I shake a French fry in their faces, and they have big smiles.

"No, baby, I think it's time for a tournament." Bas suggests and I quip my brows.

"If we lose, we keep the numbers but at least a chance for us to earn our names back?"

I smirk. That sounds like fun.

"What game were you thinking?"

"Hold'em poker." Mason says

My grin widens even more. I was an undefeated champion at that game back then.

Our moment gets interrupted when the fathers walk in together. They look like they just came from playing golf. The mood sours immediately. Its confirmed then, the guys are at odds with their fathers.

"So, we need to talk to all of you." Mason's father says when they stand next to the table.

I see the guy's frowns deepen.

"What is this about?" Jose asks with an annoyed look

"I think we are overdue a conversation." Jose's father, tone polite and he isn't demanding. I see the protest in the guy's eyes, but I get up first. We all need to get this over with.

We all leave the table, and we head to the couch. We all seat on the long couch and the fathers sit on different couches and seats. They look at each other before Mason's father starts.

"Okay, so we want to start by apologizing to all of you. It is our fault. You suffered for our sins. We fucked up. We dragged all of you in our shit with Sean and that should have never happened and now this." Mason's father points in my general direction and I flinch a little. I feel like an animal at the zoo or a lepper.

It stings that he won't acknowledge my pregnancy as a normal thing, but I keep it in. maybe I'm just being sensitive. Peanut may have come as a consequence of me and the guys recklessness but he isn't a secret shame or a mistake.

Leo's father picks up the baton. "It is all on us. We know all of you have been through a lot. Zahara, what we did to you was vile. You are one of ours and we treated you like you didn't deserve. We are the ones that forced the boys to go after you in the first place. So please place the blame where it belongs, on all of us."

"I would also like apologize to you, Zahara firstly. What we did to you was vile, as Jamie has said. You are our child too and you are now carrying our grandchild and none of this should have happened. We were angry and bitter, and we took it out on the wrong person, and we should have never strong armed them into agreeing. We didn't give them much choice." Bas's father

"We could say much but we are asking for your forgiveness." Jose's father says. "We know all of you are still trying to work on your issues and the child. We are asking for a chance to be better. We want to be a part of our grandchild's life."

None of us respond. All they say is true. It is their feud that got us here. But am I still going to be spiteful and withhold peanut from them?

"Do you think you can ever find it in your heart to forgive us, all of us, baby star?"

I don't respond. Everybody turns their attention on me. I feel placed on the spot. I take a moment trying to sort my thoughts. Can I forgive the men responsible for the worst time of my life? Can I forgive peanut's grandfathers?

"I think I can, maybe in time, but I am not there yet. I have asked myself how the people I thought were my family could turn on me like that. I don't know when I'll be ready to forgive you, but it's not today. I'm still too hurt. What you did to me and them, it sucks. We are just kids, but we suffered because of you. You were all supposed to protect us, and it was you who hurt us most." I swallow after a pause. "We will be in each other's life for a long time because of peanut, but I don't know if I'm ready to forgive and forget what you did. We were family and it's hard for me to look passed that, if I'm honest." I pause again. "But I want to, and I will try."

"And that is all we can ask of you, child." Leo's father says.

There is a beat of silence before Jose's father speaks. "We would like to apologize to you, our sons, too." He pauses like he is going to say more but he doesn't.

"We did exploit your ambitions and your love for Zahara. We know we are the authors of your anguish. Please forgive us." Bas's father says

The guys don't answer.

Silence for a few minutes before Bas breaks the silence.

"I don't know how I'm feeling about that. It was vile what you did, and we lost months with our son because of you. We know we agreed but we didn't want to. I will forgive you when Zar forgives you."

"I am with Bas. I don't know if I'm ready to cross that bridge yet."

Silence.

The fathers look a bit punched. They look at each other, communicating something only they understand.

Mason's father clears his throat. "The takeovers?"

I frown. What about the takeovers?

I get nothing from the guy's expressions.

"We are postponing until he's born. Being with Zaza and our son is more important." Jose says and my mouth drops as my eyes almost bug out. they didn't tell me that.

"What?" I ask

Leo clamps my knee, and he nears my face. "We'll talk about it after, but it's been decided. You two are more important."

I stare at him like an idiot before a throat clearing pulls me away from his endless almost black orbs that are telling me so much.

"What about school?"

"You are registered for online school. You will do all your learning virtually. We think it's not safe for both of you to be out there."

I know it's true, but I don't want my life to be stuck here.

"So, I'm gonna live here alone? And they get to go back?"

"No, baby star, you are all staying here."

"We can go to another house if you are not comfortable here, Hoshi." Leo strokes my arm, and he gives me a small smile.

I consider it.

I shake my head. "It's fine."

"Alright, we have to get going."

"It all got fucked up, but we are family. We fight but we will come out together in the end."

The fathers all rise.

_________________________________