"I'm pulling up now Patchy, she's probably asleep," I said into the phone. Dave had been trying to get in contact with Naala since the afternoon, but her phone was off.

"I don't trust it, she doesn't sleep that deep, especially not with Saint,"

I blew out a breathe as I parked the car, "You gon' stress the rest of that struggle beard away,"

He sucked his teeth, "Brianna just check on my baby and get the fuck off my phone," He said before hanging up. I screwed up my face, that's why his beard doesn't connect, rude ass.

I got out of my truck and ran up the steps, I tried to open the door but it was locked which was a good sign – at least no one tried to break in.

I put the key through Naala's door and pushed it open slowly. The entire house was dark but what my attention was the sound of Saint's cries. I paused for a second to see if I could hear Naala but I didn't hear anything.

Closing the door behind me, I walked towards Saint room. I saw him lying in his crib, his face red and wet from all the tears. I frowned and picked him up, gently rocking him.

"Aw Bubba, where's your mama huh?" I asked him, wiping his face. His cries quietened down and I put him on my shoulder rubbing his back.

I furrowed my eyebrows because his entire diaper was soaked, alongside his outfit. "Naala?" I called out, walking out of his room.

I've only been round here once and I never went into her bedroom so I was walking the halls like a weirdo trying to find it.

I knew Patch had money but I didn't know they were rich,rich. The whole house was in pristine condition, didn't even look like someone lived here.

I came across 2 large double doors and I assumed it was the master bedroom. I pushed the door open and was met with pitch black. "Lala?" I said again. Saint was still lightly cooing.

I walked further into the room, putting on my flash so I could see. Directing the phone at the wall, I saw the light switch, which I flicked on.

I saw Naala laying in the bed, with the covers almost over her face. "Naala." I said louder making her jump. I watched as she twisted and turned before sitting up,

"Girl, I know the sleep was not that good," I spoke, "Had this boy about to cry himself to death,"

"He was crying?" She asked me getting up, her words slightly slurred. I looked at her weirdly,

"You okay?" I asked her,

She nodded and sniffed, walking over to us and tripping over the corner of the bed in the process.

"Hi my baby," She cooed, reaching for Saint. I watched her closely, seeing how slow her movements were and how spaced out she looked.

She took Saint from my arms, "Oh, he's wet," She frowned.

"How long have you been asleep Lala? Dave's been trying to call you,"

Naala shrugged walking out of the room slowly, I followed behind her back into Saint's room.

"Lala, I asked you a question,"

"Briiiii, relax," She dragged out with a smile, "I fell asleep and forgot to bring the baby monitor in with me," She set Saint down on the changing table and reached for the diapers, but her hand slipped and she knocked everything down.

"Uhn uhn, Naala look at me," I said moving closer to her and dropping my purse. I grabbed her chin and looked at her properly, "You're high Lala, come on,"

"Don't judge me," She muttered, "I just needed a pick me up,"

"Naala." I said shaking my head, "How long have you been clean?" I knew all about her past drug abuse because it was also something I struggled with after I had Caiden. Post Partum Depression is not the one, both my and Naala had a nice heart to heart about how that messed us up and now here she was; high.

"4 years," She mumbled fixing her robe, I sighed and stepped back to the changing table, so that I could change Saint for her.

"Why?" I asked her. I reached down and picked up the diapers, taking one.

She shrugged and leaned on the wall. "Don't shrug Lala, why?"

In such a short time, I've grown attached to Naala, after all she's been through I just wanted to protect her – to be the proper big sister she never had.

"I wanted a break," She said lowly,

"A break is talking to me or Dave, a break is asking me to take Saint for the night, not ruining 4 years of sobriety. I don't want to make you feel bad because I know you probably already do, but isn't the way,"

Tears welled up in her eyes and she threw her head back, "I didn't mean to do it,"

I shook my head, "You did otherwise you wouldn't have," I said truthfully. "How many did you take?"

"Not enough," She mumbled thinking I couldn't hear her. I finished up with Saint, who was chewing his fist

"He's probably hungry but now you can't feed him," I said to her, lifting him up.

"Please don't tell Amir," She pleaded, allowing a few tears to fall.

"Naala what would have happened if didn't turn up?" I asked her, she huffed and rolled her eyes."Don't get an attitude at me, I'm not gonna tell him. You are."

She scrunched up her face, "I'm not telling him, he'll try and take Saint away from me,"

"Maybe that would be for your own good," I responded. Her face contorted in anger, if I wasn't holding Saint, I'm sure would have jumped me.

"Y'all are all the same. Trying to make me seem crazy so you can take my children away from me. Did Amir put you up to this? I wouldn't be surprised if he did, what are y'all fucking? Is that why?" She laughed.

Now why the hell is she laughing? God if I'm about to die please let me know.

I looked at her and then turned back to see if she was talking to somebody else, "Girl them Xanax's are fucking with you, ain't they?"

"You didn't deny it," She scoffed leaning off the wall. Now she's serious again, I ain't know she was this damn crazy.

"Naala I am not about to play with you." I said seriously, "Where would I find the time to be with him when you're always with him or I'm always with you,"

She shrugged, "He's cheated before so I can't put it past him,"

"You need to focus on yourself, like I said I'm not gonna tell him anything until you do,"

"Alright, give me my son," She said rudely.

"He's hungry so I'm gonna make him a bottle, go and shower and sober up before I call Patchy up here,"

Naala rolled her eyes, "Thinks she's someone's mama," She tried to mumble under her breath but failed.

"I know you're not thinking straight so I'ma ignore the slick comments,"

I left Saint's room and walked to the kitchen, "Your mama is a very crazy lady," I whispered to him.

I heard the shower cut on so I knew she actually listened to me. My phone rang in my pocket so I transferred Saint to the other shoulder and answered it,

"Bri, is she good?" Dave asked me,

"Hi Bri, thanks for checking up on her, how are you?" I said sarcastically,

"My bad, hi Bri, is she good?" He asked me again.

"She's in the shower, I'm making Saint a bottle," I said without thinking,

"Why she didn't breast feed him?" He responded quickly,

"I think she said something about her nipples being sore," I lied. I shook the bottle with one hand, carefully.

"Mmm, there's some nipple balm in the drawer, just rub some on there for her,"

"First of all, you have to be the cutest baby daddy I know. And secondly ew, I'm not doing that,"

He sucked his teeth, "I was calling because I'm coming home so you don't have to stay,"

Wait a minute.

"What about Sinai? You don't need to come back, I can stay," I said quickly,

"Nah I'm on my way back, I left Bully there, she's good,"

Shit.

"Okay let me feed Saint and then I'll leave," We wrapped up on the phone and I hung up.

"Shit,shit,shit," I said to myself. I looked at Saint who just stared back at me, "Boy he about to beat your mama's ass," I laughed. It wasn't funny but it was.

I walked back to Saint's room and sat down, giving him the bottle. I could still hear Naala in the shower – poor girl. She did not know what was about to hit her. After about 20 minutes, Saint was done with the bottle and was asleep in his crib. I heard the door slam downstairs.

Naala came out into the hallway, "Amir?" She called out. She was clutching her towel and her hair was wet.

"Bitch don't call him," I whisper yelled, "Look at me," I said to her in a hurried tone,

"Shit." I mumbled. Her pupils were still dilated and she was swaying to the side slowly.

"Come on," I said dragging her into their room. I sat her down on her vanity, and put her robe on her.

"Get in the bed," I whispered to her,

"He's gonna know," She laughed. Why was this bitch laughing?

"Naala quit being silly and get yo' ass in the bed!"

"Baby?" I heard Dave call out. I pushed Naala into the bed and pulled the covers over her,

"Ooo I like it rough" She purred. Oh my God.

"Naala stop it," I gritted out as she tried to get out of the bed.

"What are y'all doing?" Dave asked coming through the door, he was mugging the hell out of me. Now why am I in it?

"Papaaaa," Naala dragged out sitting up in the bed with a big smile on her face.

"She's been drinking?" He sighed walking over to her. He sat at the edge of the bed and shook his head. She climbed into his lap and clung to him,

"I missed you," She whispered in his ear and then licked his ear. This is where I get the hell out go here.

"Bri, she's been drinking?" Dave asked me again, pulling her hand away from his beard.

"Something like that," I mumbled getting closer to the bed. I pointed to the bottle of Xanax on her dresser. He followed my finger and sighed heavily.

"Love why do you keep doing this to yourself?" He asked her, disappointment laced his voice.

"I'm sorry," She pouted, rubbing his chest, "I won't do it again I promise," She slurred.

Dave got up, pushing her off his lap. "We can't do this again Naala, we can't. I gave you a pass when Sinai first got hurt but we not doing this,"

"Wait, this wasn't the first time?" I said to him, confused.

"Nah it's not the first fucking time Bri, she relapsed a few days after the accident and I threw all that shit out so I don't know where she got it from," He mumbled grabbing the bottle of the dresser.

"I said I'm sorry," Naala said crying, "I needed it, you don't understand. Bri you understand, you know how this feels," She crawled to the edge of the bed, where I stood.

"Naala I --"

"You know!" She shouted, "I-I feel like I'm suffocating and that there is no air for me to b-breathe and this," She said pointing to the bottle in Dave's hand, "This helps me breathe,"

"I'm not even gonna listen to this shit," Dave huffed storming out,

"Bri you get it - you know," She cried sinking back into the bed.

"I do but you need help Naala," I said to her softly, "You know I only ever want the best for you and those pills aren't good for you,"

She nodded and got into the bed. I checked the time and sighed, getting in the bed with her. She snuggled close to me, her tears drenching my t-shirt.

"I'm gonna be here every step of the way," I whispered to her, "You need to be better for those two monsters," I joked,

"I want to," She replied, "I really want to but Amir doesn't get it, he doesn't know how it feels like to be me,"

"Explain it to him, no shouting, no having sex with him to shut him up, just talk. Y'all have the worst communication because you are both stubborn as hell. I'm not coming for your relationship because mine is far from perfect but you are putting all your problems onto your relationship, that's why you always feel hurt. You and Patch are made for each other but you can't keep hurting yourselves in order to love each other - it doesn't work."

"Mmm, I don't want to lose him," She responded, "If we talk and he finds out how I truly feel, he'll leave me and take my kids away."

"How do you feel?" I asked her,

"Like I don't want to be here anymore. I don't have the will to live anymore Bri. Sometimes I'm forcing my self to care about Saint, you know sometimes I think of doing really bad things to him,"

I nodded, "Is it when you're overwhelmed?" I understood exactly where she was coming from, this was a clear sign of postpartum depression.

"Last week, I let him cry until one of the nurses came into the room. Why do I feel like this? How can I hate my own son Bri?"

"You don't hate him," I hugged her as her tears fell, "You're not well,"

"But I want to be there, I try to love him, I know he feels connected to me but I don't feel that way. When everyone's around, I pretend,"

"You need help Lala, I can't give you that help," I whispered to her,

"He's gonna leave me," She cried,

"Naala he's not gonna do that, he loves you way too much for that," I said truthfully, "You know he told me to rub nipple cream on your nipples because I lied and said they were sore,"

Naala pouted, "I love him so much,"

"He loves you too but y'all need to talk and NO sex," I emphasised the last part to her.

"But I need him," She said frowning, "I can't not have sex with him, it's like I'm addicted to it,"

"You gon' end up pregnant again if you not careful," I laughed,

"I'm on the pill," She whispered, I looked at her weirdly,

"Why you whispering?" I asked her. I'm about to leave because her crazy ass is too weird.

"Because if he finds out, he's gonna throw them out," She replied.

"I already threw them out!" We heard from outside the door. I scrunched up my face,

"You've been listening the whole time?" I asked as he pushed the door back open.

"Nah, I just came back up, I was checking on Saint," He mumbled, his eyes on Naala.

"Welp, I'ma head out, make sure that fool hasn't burned my damn house down," I said getting out of the bed. I turned around and kissed Naala's head, "You're gonna get better, I promise,"

She smiled softly, "Love you Brianna,"

"Love you too crazy," I smiled back, "See you later Patch," I said bumping his shoulder. He pushed me back and sucked his teeth,

"It ain't even that patchy," He mumbled rubbing his beard. I laughed at him,

"It very much is," I said to him. He mugged me then said,

"Lemme speak to you real quick, Lala stay your ass in that bed," He spoke. Naala huffed and leaned back, crossing her arms.

We walked out of the room and he closed the door behind him, "Thanks for coming out Brianna, that meant a lot to me,"

I waved him off, "Naala's my girl, she needs someone to be genuinely there for her, no strings attached."

He nodded, "You think she needs rehab?"

"I think that would help her, but I'm not sure she will go willingly" I said honestly, "You know how she feels about being away from the kids,"

"I get that, but I can't trust her Bri. She was getting high with Saint in the next room,"

I sighed, "She's got postpartum depression,"

"For real?" He sighed, "But she loves Saint,"

"It doesn't mean she doesn't love him, she's just having a hard time connecting with me,"

"I don't believe that," He shook his head, "They are always together,"

"Because that's her son, she has no choice to be around him."

"What the fuck am I going to do Bri?" He huffed leaning against the wall,

"Rehab is the best option, she can do a fast track one, 3 weeks max."

"I'ma see if I can convince her to go but I doubt she will," He said rubbing his braids.

"Be calm with her, don't shout at her," I said to him. On almost every occasion I've been around them, when they argue Dave would shout at her and then it become something more.

"Can't promise you that," He mumbled. My phone vibrated in my hand.

"Let me leave before your cousin sends a search party," I said looking at my phone. Priest had called me 3 times, meaning he was looking for me.

"I will check on her tomorrow, just be gentle with her - she's gonna be really sensitive tonight,"

"I can't keep doing this Brianna, it's fucking with me," I frowned as a saw his eyes getting cloudy,

Not Patchy about to cry,

"Dave it's okay," I said soothingly,

"I don't know how to help her, that's my fucking heart man," He sniffed,

I rubbed his shoulder, "She's gonna be okay,"

"Drugs Bri? She don't want to be around us that bad?"

"It's hard, those pills fuck with you," I responded, "It's not you guys,"

He huffed and wiped his face, "Rehab is the only option now,"

"I agree with you," I replied, "Stop crying now, you're making it weird,"

He sucked his teeth, "I'ma kill you and help them look for your body if tell anybody about that," He pointed at me,

"You know my cash app," I cheesed, "I take anything from $0 to $10,000,"

"Yeah yeah, my cousin bought you the bag?" He asked me, I nodded and held my purse up.

"Why were you gonna get it?"

He shrugged, "I might have, Naala's birthday's coming up so I'ma be shopping, send me what you want," Don't have to tell me twice.

I smiled hard, "Thanks baby brother," I said squeezing his cheeks,

"Aight get off me now," He mugged me, pushing my arms off.

"Thanks a lot Bri, I mean it," He smiled lightly, never seen his ugly ass smile.

"You're good," I smiled back. My phone rang in my hand and I gave Dave one last smile before heading towards the door,

"Yes Winston?" I said as soon as I picked up.

"Where you at?" He shouted into the phone. It was a FaceTime call so I could see him chewing. He's always eating, "Caiden asking for fried chicken and you know I can't make that shit,"

"Stop cursing around my son Priest,"

"His little ass shouldn't be all up in my mouth," He said back, "Yeah you nigga, get out of my mouth," He snapped.

"Lord, I'm coming," I laughed. He flipped the camera and I saw Caiden sitting on the couch, playing the game.

"Caiden I know you are not playing that game when you have homework," I said into the phone,

"I did tell him," Priest mumbled. I rolled my eyes,

"You shut up because he should have been doing it, you still letting him play the game,"

"I ain't his mama," Priest said scrunching his face up, "He's 6, at 6 my mama was sending me to the corner to buy her crack,"

"Winston!" I snapped at him,

"What's crack?" Caiden asked in the background,

"I eat your mama's ass cra -"

"Winston I'ma beat your ass when I get home, I'm dead serious," I said cutting him off, "Trynna tell my son all dat,"

I heard raised voices and the sound of things slamming. "Oh lord, wait a second Priest, Dave and Naala are at it again,"

"Mmm my favourite toxics," He smiled, "Why they ain't invite me over there?" He asked pouring MY hot chips into his mouth,

"Are those my chips?" I asked him. His face dropped and he put the bag down,

"Gotta blast," He said before hanging up. I swear I'm beating his ass.

The shouting and slamming stoped abruptly and then the sound of Naala's moans filled the entire house.

"Ewww," I dragged out, heading to the door,

"I'm not gonna take them no more," Naala moaned out making me scrunch my face up even more.