😭

"You not gonna give me a kiss?" Dave asked as he was inches away from Naala's face,

"Boy move," Naala said moving her head, "I don't know where your lips have been,"

"They could have been on your lips, but you're playing,"

Dave replied sitting closely to Naala's hospital bed,

"One kiss," He pleaded with a smirk,

Naala sighed and pecked his lips, "There," She replied sitting back.

Dave leaned forward and kissed her properly, he sucked on her bottom lip and pulled away, "Stop playing with me," He gave her three pecks after causing her to pull back.

It was now a day after their son was born and Naala was ready to leave the hospital with her baby. However due to his underdeveloped lung, he was going to be in the NICU for at least two months. Naala cried so much when the doctor told her this.

"Stop it," Naala muttered softly pushing him back as he tried to kiss her again, "Don't think I've forgotten everything that's happened over the last month,"

Dave rolled his eyes, "I've said sorry over a million times, I'm not about to kiss your ass,"

"I don't need you to kiss my ass, I need you to know why you're even apologising, I need actions. You think saying that 5 letter word is going to change how I feel," Naala explained,

"What do you want me to do? I'll do it," Dave spoke looking her in the eye,

"I can't tell you what to do, if you don't know what to do then clearly we don't need to be together," Naala replied shifting in the bed.

"You're not even trying," Dave mumbled getting up from his seat,

"You are not about to guilt trip me. You are literally the reason I am laying in this hospital bed right now," Naala spoke, raising her voice slightly,

"I thought we're not playing the blame game," Dave chuckled humourlessly, "I said I was sorry,"

"I don't -" Naala was cut off by the room door opening. In walked a nurse, pushing an incubator in.

"I thought you would like to see him this morning," The nurse spoke,

Naala sat quickly and cooed, "My baby, can I hold him?" She was already over the conversation with Dave, just seeing her son was enough.

The nurse nodded, "You can have a skin to skin session now but not for too long, he can't be out of the humidity for long periods of time," She explained referring to the incubator.

The nurse carefully took the baby out of the incubator, trying not to disturb any of the tubes. Dave helped Naala take down her gown,

"Amir move," She said as he just stood there staring at her,

"Your titty is just-" Dave stuttered pointing at her nipples, he didn't know if it was pregnancy but Naala's boobs had grown enormously.

The nurse laughed and put the baby on Naala's chest with a blanket.

"Hi my baby," Naala whispered with tears welling in her eyes, "I'm your mommy,"

The nurse left the room to give them some privacy. Dave moved closer to the bed and just looked at their baby.

"You can come closer," Naala said to him. Dave nodded and took a seat right by the bed.

"That's your daddy over there, but he's a bit shy," Naala smiled kissing the baby on his head.

"He's just so small," Dave muttered,

"You can touch him," Naala replied, "Look hold his hand," She said lifting up his tiny hand,

Dave leaned forward and held onto his small hand. As soon as the baby felt the his finger, he tightened his entire hand around Dave's finger.

"He needs a name," Naala muttered softly, looking down at him.

"What about Saint?" Dave replied quickly. Yesterday he was thinking of names and that name stuck with him.

Naala smiled, "I love it, Saint and Sinai," She wanted a S name and that seemed perfect.

"I was thinking Nasir for his middle name," She added,

"Saint Nasir Brewster?" Dave asked rubbing the baby's hand.

"It's perfect," Naala whispered, "Hi Saint," She smiled rubbing his back. Saint cooed and moved his head,

"I think he likes it," Dave replied. These were the moments he lived for,

Dave sat back and watched Naala interact with Saint. She was talking to him about any and everything she could think of. That familiar feeling of guilt crept up again,

"You have a big sister who may be a bit upset that you're a boy," Naala giggled, "But when she sees how perfect you are, I don't think she will mind," Naala looked down at Saint with nothing but pure love and joy.

"Naala," Dave called out, licking his lips.

"Mmm," Naala hummed, not taking her eyes off Saint.

"I know I keep apologising but I am truly sorry. I didn't mean to sleep with Millie, it just happened. I hate the way I treated you, I was wrong. I want us to be better for our kids - "

"I want us to be better as well but you hurt me so badly and you didn't care," Naala explained finally looking at him, "This last month, you've made me feel so low, this is how I felt around Darnell and that scared me,"

"I never meant to hurt you, I was just angry," Dave mumbled,

"Angry at what? I didn't do anything to you," Naala replied with a confused expression,

"You didn't even try to work on our relationship, you just threw me out,"

"You cheated on me! What more was there to work on? You knew how sensitive I was at that time and whilst I was laid up in a hospital bed, you had sex with someone you told me not to worry about," Naala said fixing Saint on her chest, "Amir, you constantly told me that Millie wasn't a factor and that was a lie."

"It was only one time," Dave retorted,

"One time that got her fucking pregnant," Naala sighed, "So don't try and make it out as if I just gave up - you gave me no choice,"

"I'm sorry," Dave muttered, "I'ma do better, I promise,"

"Have you slept with her since that time?" Naala asked,

Dave shifted uncomfortably in his seat, "Yeah," He admitted,

"When?" Naala asked biting her lip, to hold back tears.

"When you kicked me out," Dave spoke quietly. Naala let a few tears fall,

"And you say 'I didn't even try'," Naala said mocking his voice, "I kicked you out and the first thing you did was go and fuck another bitch,"

"I was angry," Dave shrugged, he didn't see a problem with what he did - they weren't together.

"Get out," Naala muttered looking back down at Saint.

"Love please -" Dave started to say,

"Get out!" Naala said loudly, startling Saint causing him to cry. The nurse who was lingering by the door, came in at the sound of Saint's loud cries.

"I think he's hungry," Naala said to the nurse as she lifted him off her chest,

"Probably," The nurse nodded, "You can come and feed him at the NICU if you would like?"

"I will come, his dad has somewhere else to be," Naala replied wiping her face.

"Love don't do this," Dave said standing up,

"Amir you are making this harder than it has to be," Naala explained pulling her gown back on,

"Would you like a wheelchair?" The nurse asked as she got Saint settled back in his incubator.

Naala shook her head, "I can walk," She stood up and groaned at the soreness in between her legs,

Dave walked over and tried to help her,

"Get off me," Naala gritted out, "Pass me my robe," She said pointing at the white robe provided by the hospital. Dave passed her the robe which she snatched and put one.

"I'm ready," Naala smiled weakly at the nurse,

The nurse nodded and led both the incubator and Naala out of the room towards the NICU.

Dave stood in the room alone, regretting everything he had just told Naala. His phone buzzed loudly halting his thoughts,

Nai 💕

Would like to FaceTime.....

Dave answered the phone and Sinai's face popped up on the screen.

"Hi daddy!" She spoke excitedly, "Where's my baby brother?" She pouted. When Sinai found out that Naala had a boy she was very upset but her grandma talked her into the idea that now she won't have to share her toys.

"He's gone to eat with your mama," Dave replied, "You being good for your grandma?"

Sinai nodded, "We're going to the mall now," Sinai explained flipping the camera to show Sonia who was driving.

"That's fun, make sure you get me something nice," Dave laughed,

"I ain't got no money," Sinai replied, "You gon' give me money daddy?" She asked tilting her head to the side,

"I'ma pay you back. Don't be using that phone too much either, it's just for you to call me or your mama." Dave warned. They didn't want Sinai to get addicted to her phone.

"I won't," Sinai said, her face oddly close to the camera, "Grandma look it's daddy," Sinai said to Sonia who was driving,

"Hey baby, how's my grandson?" She asked concentrating on the road,

"He's good ma, his name is Saint," Dave said proudly,

"That is beautiful, how you doing?" She asked him,

"Tired as he-, heck" Dave said catching himself,

"You weren't the one that gave birth," Sonia laughed, "How's Lala?"

"She's good, she trying to be strong but I know this is hard for her,"

Sonia nodded, "Just go easy on her, her hormones are gonna be all over the place for a while,"

"I know," Dave mumbled, "I'ma speak to y'all later,"

"Bye daddy!" Sinai said loudly,

"I don't like bye, always see you later baby," He replied,

"See you later daddy," Sinai sang into the phone before hanging up quickly. Dave shook his head, she was always hanging up on him.

He scrolled through his Twitter and came across a tweet that he was being tagged in,

Dave huffed because he thought that they were being discreet but clearly people had spotted them.

Dave took a seat and put his head in his hands. He was exhausted but mostly he was disappointed in himself. All he seemed to keep doing was hurting the people he loved - most importantly he was hurting Naala more than he already had.

He put his head down and put his hands together and did the only thing he could think of.

"I know I don't do this often so bare with me God," He spoke quietly, "I don't know what I'm doing, I keep hurting her, I need you Lord, I need something because I love her so much and I can't lose her," Dave prayed, "Just show me what I have to do - how can I make this better?"

Dave continued to pray silently, he didn't realise that 30 minutes had passed. Naala walked back into the room and scoffed when she saw him in the chair,

"Why are you still here?" She winced as she took off the robe and slipped into the bed,

"I'm not leaving you," Dave replied, "Tell me what I can do Naala, please?"

Their eyes connected and Naala saw the hurt in his eyes that matched the same look in her eyes.

"Stop that," Naala muttered, "You're trying to make me feel bad,"

"I'm not, I promise I just want us to be better," Dave pleaded,

"I can't trust you," Naala cried, "I can't go through another toxic relationship, I won't,"

"What about therapy?" Dave rushed out, "I'll do anything,"

"Amir." Naala stated firmly, "Let's focus on co-parenting for now,"

Dave shook his head, "No, I'm not raising children in different households,"

"Who's fault is that?" Naala quizzed, "Do you think I want this? Do you think I want my children to grow up in a unstable environment?"

"It looks like that to me," Dave replied,

"You are honestly unbearable. You say you want us to do better and then within a second you are disrespecting me again," Naala said sitting back in the bed,

"I just want us to work!" Dave said louder than necessary,

"Whatever Amir, you have another family to think about," Naala replied waving him off,

"This is the only family that matters to me," Dave replied quickly,

"Don't let Matilda hear that," Naala chuckled,

"Why you playing?" Dave said looking at her,

"I'm doing you like you do me," Naala shrugged,

"If you don't let me back in the house, I'm gonna kill myself," Dave said seriously,

"You're pathetic," Naala muttered playing with her blanket,

"Really?" Dave said softly,

"What do you want me to say? 'No Amir please don't kill yourself'? Amir get the fuck out of here," Naala spoke,

Dave parted his lips to speak but was cut of by the door opening, In walked Taina and Gray.

"Oh my God," Taina said rushing over to Naala's side. She gave Dave a dirty look causing him to step to the side, "Are you okay babe?" Taina asked hugging her,

"I'm fine," Naala laughed, "Very sore but I'm good,"

"Hey Lil baby," Gray smiled walking over and kissing her cheek. Dave clenched his jaw as he saw Naala's face light up. He decided not to say anything and just watch their interaction.

"Teddy," Naala smiled back, "You came down here for little old me,"

"As soon as T told me you gave birth, I knew I had to come and check on you," Gray replied, taking a seat on the sofa.

"Thank you," Naala replied, "That means a lot,"

"So where is the little man?" Taina asked, looking around the room.

Naala pouted, "He's at the NICU, they're telling me he can't come home,"

"Damn, I'm sorry La, he's in good hands I'm sure," Gray spoke rubbing her hand,

Naala smiled lightly, "Yeah but I just want to cuddle him and love on him all day,"

"You can cuddle me?" Gray offered opening his arms, Naala happily complied and melted in his arms - hence the nickname, Teddy.

"He's a real man," Taina commented cutting her eyes to Dave,

"You got something to say Taina?" Dave asked. The sound of his voice made Gray look over at him, he assumed that this was Naala's baby daddy.

"Yeah I do." Taina spat, "This wouldn't be happening right now if you hadn't stressed my best friend out,"

"It's okay T," Naala spoke quietly, she couldn't take another argument,

"No it's not okay Lala, why is he even here?" Taina said looking Dave up and down,

"Man, Naala I'ma be at the NICU," Dave said leaving the room.

"Alright," Naala spoke softly. She knew how Taina felt about him so this was no surprise to her.

"Stupid ass nigga," Taina said before taking a seat close to Naala, "Anyway, how are you really Lala?"

"I'm okay, this is very weird for me because when I had Sinai I was able to be with her at all times but it won't be for long," Naala said trying to convince herself,

"That's right," Gray said softly, "Y'all got a name?"

"Saint Nasir Brewster," Naala smiled proudly,

"You gave him that last name?" Taina spoke, "You're a better woman than me,"

Naala rolled her eyes, "I can't not give him that last name, that's his dad," Naala muttered,

"I would be pissed if my son didn't have my last name," Gray added,

"He doesn't have a right to be angry," Taina replied,

"Nana just leave it, please?" Naala asked rubbing her head, she could feel a headache coming on.

"I'm looking out for you Lala, who else is going to?" Taina said, "Your family are basically nonexistent,"

That struck a nerve for Naala, "I don't need anyone to look out for me!" She snapped, "Is that what y'all think? That I constantly need people looking out for me?"

Taina shook her head, "I didn't mean it like that -"

"How else could you have meant it?" Naala spoke cutting her off, "Y'all treat me like I'm glass," Naala was honestly tired of it. She knew that she had issues but the people around her always wrapped her in cotton wool and acted like she couldn't function on her own,

"We don't," Taina responded. Gray stayed quiet because he could already see how irate Naala was getting.

"You do! Everyone is always tip toeing around me, scared to say something that can set me off," Naala shouted,

"I don't want you to try and kill yourself again!" Taina snapped, instantly regretting what she had said. When Sinai was a baby and Naala attempted to kill herself, Taina was the one that found her. That was one of the scariest moments of her life,

Naala's face dropped, "Erm- wow," She muttered. She felt very embarrassed that Taina had just blurted that out.

"Naala I'm sorry," Taina started but was stopped by Naala putting her hand up,

"Don't apologise because you don't mean it," She said clearing her throat, "Thanks for stopping by guys but I'm exhausted," She spoke softly lying back in the bed,

"We'll come back later," Gray said standing to his feet, "Won't we T?" He said nudging Taina's shoulder,

"Y-yeah," Taina stuttered, "Bye La," She spoke leaving the room. Naala smiled lightly at waited till they left the room before she burst into tears.

Everything was getting too much for her, if it wasn't arguing with Dave, it was thinking about her son who was all alone at the NICU. What Taina had just said, pushed her over the edge, she couldn't seem to find a balance in life. There was always something holding her back from true happiness.

Naala laid in the bed and cried her eyes out, she cried because she was mentally, emotionally and physically drained.