My anxiety was at about an eleven out of ten. Trevor should be on his way, tonight he was meeting my family. Well my family minus my dad who conveniently had to work late tonight.

I never thought I'd be doing this. My parents weren't super involved in my life and they never really seemed to care what I was doing. All their focus went to avoiding each other and dealing with my brother. I seemed to just be invisible, until now.

It all went wrong when Trevor dropped me off after we went and got pizza.

—

I walked into my house and my mom was sitting at the kitchen table looking through a gardening magazine. Those were her weaknesses.

I wanted to run the beach trip past her and make sure she was good with me going. I didn't foresee her having any issues with me going but I at least needed to ask.

"Hey mom." I sat down across from her.

"What are you up to today?" She asked setting her magazine down.

"I just got back from pizza with my friends but I was hoping to ask you something."

"Anything."

"Well we were all talking and thought that it would be fun to go to the beach for the weekend during our spring break." I told her.

"Is that boyfriend of yours going?" She questioned.

"Yeah." I nodded.

"I think we should meet him properly before you go on any trips with him." She stated.

"Ok he can come over something this week for dinner if that works." I offered.

"I get out of work early on Tuesday so I'll cook up something special."

Trevor was meeting the family on Tuesday. In three days.

—

When the doorbell rang I raced to answer it. I knew it was Trevor. I swung the door open to see him standing there nervously.

"Do I look ok?" He straightened out his button down.

I told him he didn't have to dress up but seeing him now, I was very glad he did.

"You look great." I grinned.

"Just great? Not hot or I don't know maybe even sexy?" He teased.

"You're full of yourself." I shook my head and laughed.

"But you love me anyways." He leaned down and kissed me, it was quick but still made my heart burst.

"Sadly." I joked and led him into the kitchen.

"It's nice to meet you Mrs. Winters," Trevor smiled and greeted my mother.

"You must be Trevor." She looked him over and seemed to be satisfied with his attire and I was sudden glad that despite me telling him he didn't need to wear a button down that he did.

"You have a lovely home." He complimented. "And a lovely daughter." He added and sent me a wink.

I just shook my head at him.

"I made baked potatoes, I hope that's ok with you." My mom stated.

"Sounds amazing Mrs. Winters." Trevor grinned.

I nudged him.

He gave me a questioning look.

I waited until my mom went off to finish setting up the table.

"You're trying too hard, just be you." I encouraged him.

"You got it." He leaned over and gave me a quick peck and when he pulled away he had a huge smile spread across his face.

Just seeing him like this made me smile. I knew I shouldn't be nervous about how this would go but I couldn't help it.

Within a couple minutes my brother emerged and all my nerves spiked to a thousand.

"Trevor." Jackson frowned at my boyfriend and stuck his hand out to shake.

"Jackson." Trevor nodded and shook my brother's hand.

"So what are your intentions with my sister." He brother was staring down Trevor.

I really couldn't believe he was being like this.

"Jackson." I gave him a pointed look.

"I'm just trying to make sure he's good enough for you." Jack waved me off.

"I just want to make her happy." Trevor answered.

My brother looked unconvinced. I didn't know what he was thinking but I don't think I want to know.

"So you needing a break and leaving her sulking around the house for days is you making her happy?"

I wanted to punch him, what was he thinking? I couldn't believe that my brother was being like this.

"Dinners ready." My mom interrupted.

I breathed a sigh of relief and just guided Trevor to the table.

I looked over at him and he just smiled at me. I knew we'd make it through this dinner just fine but I didn't want it to be this torturous.

We all fix a plate and get settled in our seats. I was hoping the dinner part would go better.

"So Trevor what are your plans for after you graduate?" My mom asked.

I knew she was going to ask this.

"I am thinking about joining the military but I still need to talk to my parents. If I don't do that I've applied to some local colleges and I'll go in undecided and try and figure out what I want to do from there." He answered.

I knew how much Trevor wanted his parents full support for his plans to enlist and I hoped that they would give him that.

My mom continued to throw questions like that towards Trevor and he just answered each one with ease. I just hoped my mom thought this was going as well as I did.

When the dinner was over Trevor said his goodbyes and I walked him out of the house and to his car.

"So how'd I do?" He asked.

"Better than I thought." I said truthfully.

"You really shouldn't doubt me." He joked.

I nudged his shoulder. He was too much somethings.

"I should probably go in and hear what she has to say and hopefully get the all clear for spring break." I told him.

"Let me know when you find out?"

"Of course." I nodded.

Trevor pulled me close to him and gave me a quick kiss goodbye.

"I'll see you tomorrow Ella." He pulled away and walked to his car.

"See you tomorrow." I repeated and watched as he drove away.

I waked back into my house to see my mom cleaning up.

"You need help?" I asked.

"If you don't mind." She nodded and I went to work next to her clearing the table.

I just anxiously waited for her thoughts on Trevor. I didn't know when she'd decide to share them but I hoped it would be sooner rather than later.

Once we cleared all the dishes off the table my mom sat down.

"Sit." She gestured to the chair next to her.

If it was good thoughts she would have just told me by now right?

I listened to her and sat in the chair.

"Trevor is a nice kid." She stated not going any further.

I nodded trying to see where this was going.

"I'm just not sure he's good for you."

The words felt like a knife.

"What?" I didn't believe what she said.

"I don't want you going on that trip Ella."

"Why? What did Trevor do? He was nothing but polite all night. He has done nothing to show that he isn't good enough for me. He makes me happy mom and I think you'd have to be blind not to see that." I just couldn't understand what she was saying.

"You need someone with clear goals for their future. You want someone driven towards success. You don't need someone that's going to drag you down. I can't tell you who you can and can not see but I can tell you not to go on that trip."

My mother has lost her mind.

"You don't know what I want. You don't know what I need. What gives you the right to think you can finally try and have a say in my life? You and Dad have barely given a passing thought about my life these past few years. You can't just all of a sudden decide that you want to be a parent because you don't love the guy I am seeing. You don't know him, you had one dinner with him and now you think you can judge what kind of person he is. Shouldn't you judge that based on how much happier I've been lately and how I have someone that will let me cry on their shoulder because my parents don't seem to care." They were low blows, I knew that but I let my anger get the best of me.

"I don't think that you should be with someone that your family doesn't approve of. Your brother didn't seem so fond of him either."

"Jackson is just being overprotective. He can see how much happier I am with Trevor and he is just being a good older brother and making sure Trevor doesn't hurt me. I don't know what else you want from me mom. Do you want me to find a guy like dad who avoids being in the same room as me at all possible costs? Do you want me to find someone that will ditch his family on Christmas just so he doesn't have to spend time with me? Because if that's what you want then I guess I will be as miserable as you for the rest of my life." I didn't know what came over me, the second the words left my mouth I regretted them.

My mom didn't say anything she just sat there. I felt my throat start to close up, I was seconds away from sobbing. I knew I could only hold back my tears for so long.

"I'm going on that trip." I managed to get the words out and I walked away towards my room.

The second I reached it and closed the door I let the flood gates down. The sobs poured out of me and I just fell into my bed and went blind with tears. I felt awful, I shouldn't have said those things but I think what was worse was that it was all true.

At some point the tears stop and exhaustion hit. I didn't even let the time for regret and self- hatred to hit before I close my eyes and slept.