Hannah

Waking up next to Micah is much nicer than I will ever admit. He's warm and soft and I just want him to stay curled around me forever. And then I remember the sacrifice he's making for me. I can't imagine how much it will hurt him to let me leave. Spending that much time away from your mate will hurt, both him and his wolf. I honestly didn't think he had it in him, the willingness to put himself aside for a moment. It shows a side of him that I would have begged for years ago. The thought makes me sigh as I watch him sleep. His features are even more beautiful under the relaxation of sleep. I reach out and trace his cheekbones down to his strong jaw. The overwhelming feeling of sadness sweeps over me and I know that I will undoubtedly miss him. At least this new man I am getting to see. Suddenly his hand snaps up and snatches mine. I look back at his eyes to see them twinkling with mischief. He gives me a little smile before kissing my fingertips.

"What cha doin, sweetness?" He asks, his voice deep and raspy from sleep and so yummy I want to eat it for breakfast.

"You're handsome when you're asleep." I admit shyly making his smile bigger.

"More handsome than when I'm awake?" He asks and I giggle.

"Well, you talk when you're awake and that ruins the appeal." I respond cheekily and he barks out a laugh, rolling to his back and slipping an arm under me to pull me close. He reaches out with his other hand and threads it in my hair before leaning down to kiss my head.

"I'm gonna miss your sass, Hannah." He says quietly and I look up at him.

"Really?" I ask and he nods.

"You are very entertaining." He says with a sad smile and I nuzzle my face back into his chest. "You should probably go pack. The first pack is expecting you this afternoon and it's a few hours away." He says sadly while tightening his hold on me.

"My mom is packing for me. I can stay with you for awhile longer. If you want." I say nervously looking up at him. He smiles wide and nods.

"I'll get us some breakfast. You wanna shower in my room?" He asks and I nod, getting out of the bed and I hear him growl a little when he sees me in his clothes. I roll my eyes at him and send him a cheeky grin.

"Like what you see?" I ask with much more confidence than I feel. He chuckles and nods, his eyes flickering to black.

"You know it, sweetness." He says smugly and I blush as I dart out of the room making him laugh a belly laugh.

He orders us breakfast and we sit and eat, spending time together before I leave. I don't know if that will make it harder or easier for him when I leave, but I hope it'll be easier.

"What are you most excited about in leaving?" He asks curiously as he throws a grape in my mouth. I sit and ponder his question while I eat.

"I'm curious how other Alpha's relate to their packs, what the Luna's duties are. How the pack hospital functions, if the people seem happy or oppressed. If they're looked at as a family, or more like worker bees just keeping the pack functioning. Also their training schedules and the strength of their warriors. If they allow women to train. Things like that." I say shrugging and he nods.

"This first pack you're going to, the Alpha's mate died in childbirth, so they don't have a Luna." He explains and a pang of grief goes through me.

"That's sad. Did the pup make it?" I ask and he nods as he chews.

"Yep. A little boy. He's about six now. Cute little shit." Micah says with an affectionate smile that I return. Shortly after his smile falls and I look at him confused.

"Your mom delivered your luggage. It's downstairs. I'll grab it so you can get dressed. You'll be leaving soon." He says somberly and I feel grief through our bond from him, which means he must be feeling it strongly. All of a sudden, the thought of leaving him makes my heart hurt. But I know I need to do it, even if I decide to come back to him. Experiencing how other packs function will make me a better Luna.

He comes back soon with my things and I change into comfortable clothes and a large hoodie, nothing attractive, and pull my hair into a ponytail. He watches me with an intense stare, like he's trying to memorize every one of my movements.

"How much longer?" I ask him.

"Griffin will be here in twenty minutes." He says and I nod before I fling myself on the bed and on top of him. He grunts at the contact but wraps his arms around me firmly and pulls me up to rest my head in his shoulder, where I just seem to fit. I feel his body relax under me, but I still feel waves of sadness crash into me from him.

"You'll call me every night?" He asks, his voice raspy like he's fighting back emotions. I nod and press a kiss to his neck making him shiver.

"Maybe more than that." I admit, surprised by my own emotions. I can feel his smile against my forehead as he plants kisses along my head. I let out a contented sigh and close my eyes, absorbing his heat and affection. We lay in companionable silence until he clears his throat.

"Griffin's here, sweetness." He says with one last squeeze. I nod and stand up, trying to avoid looking at him, scared I'll cry.

"Hey. You alright?" He asks, rubbing his hands up and down my arms. I nod and look into his eyes. I see concern, grief and affection staring back at me and I almost lose my resolve. I wrap my arms around his neck and he wraps his around my waist and pulls me so tightly into him it's hard to breathe.

"I'll be here waiting when you get back." He murmurs in my ear. I nod and let him go, turning towards the door and grabbing his hand. He stands still and I stop to look at him.

"I can't watch you go, Hannah. I just can't." He says sadly and I nod in understanding.

"Ok." I say, looking away from him. He takes his shirt off and walks to my suitcase and shoves it inside.

"In case you miss my scent." He says with a smile and I smile back, choking on a sob.

"I really will miss you, Micah." I say and he wraps me in another embrace.

"I'll miss you too, sweetness." He murmurs, kissing my head one last time. I turn and grab my suitcase, looking back at him one last time. He's looking out the window, fists clenched and jaw tight obviously fighting the urge to follow me. I walk out of the room without another word and close the door gently behind me.

I walk down the stairs, partly expecting him to chase after me and pull me back upstairs, refusing to let me leave. But he surprises me once again and I don't hear a sound out of him.

"Ready, Hannah?" Griffin asks, taking my suitcase from me. I nod and follow him out to the SUV where the rest of my stuff as well as his is already loaded. I climb into the passenger seat and look back at the packhouse. My room is on the other side, so I couldn't see him even if I wanted.

Griffin climbs in next to me and starts the car, pulling away from the packhouse. After a short drive, I feel us leave the pack boundary. It's like a little snap in our brains and I feel my bond to my pack weaken. It's then I allow my tears to fall, sobbing into my hands. Griffin looks at me sadly.

"We don't have to leave. If you don't want to." He says quietly and I shake my head.

"I have to do this. I have to experience this at least once. It just hurts. I wish things were different, Grif. Easier." He sighs and reaches over to pat my knee. He's always been the strong, silent type. He never bothered me, and never seemed to be affected by the rumors people spread. He never treated me any differently and I always appreciated that.

"Me too. You were always a sweet girl. You never deserved any of the shit Micah gave you. But you must be having some kind of effect on him. He picked me for Beta instead of that ass hat Dustin. And the fact that he's letting you leave at all like this, that says something." He says in his low, soothing tone. I nod in agreement and look out the window.

"If I stayed, if I became Luna, do you think the pack would ever accept me?" I ask him, because I know he'll be honest.

"For the most part? Yes. It's the ones our age, the ones who looked at Micah like he walks on water that you'll have issues with. But you could convince them. Just have to show them how bad ass you are." He says with a crooked smile that gives me a little hope.

"Thanks for coming with me, Grif." I say and he nods before looking back at the road.

"Anything for my future Luna."