💖 💖

***Remi's POV***

His words are ice in my veins. The sacrifice is mine to make. I have accepted it. I made peace with it. Talon is platinum, pure. He is everything I am not.

Our world needs him. It is my love that has deterred him from his destiny. My existence has stifled the God inside of my mate. The oversight is mine to rectify.

If I must give away my life so that my Talon may succeed, so be it.

"Okay." The Moon Goddess smiles gently at me. The change of her direction sends pain throughout my entire being.

"No." I shake my head. He can't do this. I will not let him. He must live. I was born to die. Talon was meant to be so much more.

"Remington, only one of you can live. It is Talon's choice to make. I'm sorry." My eyes look on incredulously. This wasn't the deal. It can't be the final decision.

"I. You. He. No." My words stumble, getting caught on my frantic tongue.

"I love you Remington. I have always loved you. Kiss our son for me. Take care of Hannah, Gracie, my mom and dad, our pack."

Talon's voice is calm, too solid to match the panic in my soul.

Shaking my head, my hands reach for my mate. As if the world has stopped, my eyes watch as Talon sinks to his knees. My mate gives me the softest smile. His eyes pour love through our bond. His neck falls to the side, bared in submission to our creator.

It's immediately overwhelming. Warmth saturates my being. My heart pounds exponentially. Every memory of my sweet mate fills my head. Moments we passed in the hallways when Talon Williams was a dream to me. Events in the pack, my mate came and went seemingly unnoticed. I noticed. I fucking noticed.

That day in the hospital, his scent, his fear filled eyes. Fear of rejection causes a stinging ache in my heart. My acceptance of our pairing, oh my heavens. My mate's joy at getting me as a mate. A whine escapes my lips. He loved me more then I comprehended.

Our first kiss. The sweet taste of his lips. The way his hands clawed at me for more than I was allowed to give. The tingles that raced through our bond at the lightest touch of affection.

I need him. I can't let him go. I will my feet to take a step to get to my mate. A blinding wave of euphoria drowns me in my stance. Our bodies crashing together, the feel of Talon swallowing me in the heat of his body. Love. Love. Love. So much love, more than I knew, more than I deserved.

Our first fight, pain; making up, crushing adoration fills me. Tears leak down my cheeks. He only knew love, so much fucking love.

Meka taking me. Kai and Meka taking each other. Wall after wall of perfect bliss bounds into me. Our children being born, more love piles onto the heaps of love.

How can I possibly live without this? I can't. I don't want to.

Talon breeding me, the joy in knowing he brought me to the brink of insanity with his touch. He watched me as I slept. His body filled me for hours. So much damn love. Too much.

"Please." The word whimpers from my trembling lips.

My blurry eyes blink back gut wrenching tears. We were fated. Fucking destiny paired us. We loved too much. What is that even?

Talon speaking to the elder. He refused the assignment. He wouldn't jeopardize us. Oh goddess, this is it. The moment fate changed its mind. Love oozes out of his mouth, words of denial concrete his unwavering devotion for me.

I didn't deserve him. I wasn't enough. I'm not enough.

Kai howls within me. His broken sobs travel like nails against the walls of my heart. Our bond. I feel it pulling, stretching, breaking.

My knees collapse, unable to handle the pain of loss. Talon withers until his face meets the dewy grass. Slumped over, my mate exhales his last breath.

Crawling, I reach for him. Pulling at the earth, my hands claw the ground to get me closer to his body. Like a shield, we fall over our mate. Heart tugging, body shaking, tears pouring and splashing against his cooling skin.

My lips caress his flesh, silently pleading for this to be a nightmare. I took it for granted, all of it was for nothing. Without Talon, I am nothing.

"Remington, you have to go." The Goddess whispers soothingly at me. Her voice is like a shrill, screeching fork against a porcelain plate.

"Shut up. Shut up. Please don't speak." My everything lays beneath me, no more.

Kai falls silent as grief fills our body. My wolf sits back, slumping against the walls of my heart. His head falls into his palms, exhausted from the emotional rampage that has taken over us.

My eyes search around me as the scenery changes. I open them wide, staring at everything that is no longer anything. Jenny's smile falters when my lips part to release a small portion of the pain inside of me.

Thrashing, I pull up off of the bed to escape. My legs push me towards the door. Yanking at the metal manacle, I push my way through. Met with my parent's faces, I suffer again, again and again.

"Talon." The whisper is so heavy, I can barely hold the cry that tries desperately to follow behind it.

"Remi." My mom lunges towards me. My form collapses against her, throwing the weight of my loss into her arms.

"He left me." A strangled gurgle leaves my lips. He fucking left me.

"Remi what are you saying?" Dad falls to his knees, capturing my head between his hands. His eyes search frantically between my own. I shake my head in his hands.

"Goddess took him from me." The words are toxic, poison on my tongue.

"That's not right. You're fated." I hear her before I see her. I didn't think. Mrs. Williams is finding out the wrong way. Is there even a right way?

"He loved me too much." It's unsensible. Disturbing. There is no possible way to love too much. Is there?

"I'm sorry." Mrs. William accepts defeat where I cannot. She pulls my body towards her shaking form. My body vibrates in her arms.

A cry so demanding breaks my attention from my loss momentarily.

"He's hungry." Jenny peaks at me from under swollen eyes. I lift slowly to my feet knowing that our son needs me. He can't be neglected because I am grieving.

Kai shakes his head inside of me. I can't do this alone. I wasn't meant to do this alone.

With tiny steps, I follow behind Jenny. My eyes find our son, nestled in his bassinet in the nursery. Tiny tears fill his tiny cheeks.

Jet black hair, perfect lips and a wailing cry greet me. Picking him up, I rock him back and forth the way I had seen Talon rock our sweet girls so many times before. I don't know how I'm going to do this.

"We will help." My mom nods along with her statement. Quietly, I nod my head in agreement. My arms shakily pull my son to my bare chest. Sitting down in the provided rocking chair, I adjust my baby. His head turns as he roots for my nipple.

Guiding our child, I feel his warm cheek press against me. His lips pucker and relax as he draws my milk from my body. A satisfied suckling sound comes from our pup's throat. Running my finger against his cheek, I gasp as oceanic blue eyes stare at me.

Talon is already everywhere while he is nowhere he needs to be.

Staring at our beautiful baby, my heart squeezes. Kai cries brokenly while looking through me at our pup. I can't stop my tears from raining down on our pup.

A hand rubs my back, the other supports my baby. My body trembles from pain. I was not meant to fucking to do this.

My child stares at me with questioning eyes. Guilt fills my spirit. Shifting the baby, I burp him just like Talon showed me. A large palm running from the base of Edward's spine to the nape of his neck.

A large burp leaves my pup. A soft smile plays on my lips. He gets that from his Daddy, the daddy he never got to know.

I place a soft kiss on my son's head. Snuggling into his neck, I draw a large gulp of his scent in. He is a perfect mix of both his Daddy and I.

Knowing I have two more children that need me, I find the strength to stand. Staring at the group of parent's who look to me for guidance, I move slowly through the door. A procession of sorrow follows behind me. I walk solemnly out of the hospital to face a pack who is wondering what had happened.

My eyes meet devastation, beauty and grace. In a show of grief, they all stand in their wolf forms, heads bowed in respect. One row to

the left, one to the right, I walk through the broken pain to get back to our home.

Jace and Lux guard the door to the pack house, their heads tucked into their chins. The air is heavy, dense with the loss that is catastrophic. I reach for the door, pushing it open slowly. My child never even flinches.

I take the stairs one at a time, careful not to jostle Edward Talon Mathews.

When I reach the nursery, I lay Edward down in the crib with a blanket beneath him. I reach for Gracie, kissing her before pulling Hannah into my arms. Ally silently moves around me snatching up pacifiers, bottles and Edward.

Without a word, Ally follows me to my room. Laying across the bed I snuggle my girls in my arms. Ally places Edward on his belly upon my chest. My eyes follow Ally's across the room. Jace comes in slowly, hesitantly. With a soft nod of my head, my bed fills with the wolves of my warriors. A room filled with grieving beasts, I close my eyes in exhaustion.

Love washes against the pain that is trapped inside of me. Grief rears it's ugly head as sobs escape my heart. I can't hold on, I don't want to.

Howls fill the air. Each warrior grieves with me, for me and for Talon. I do nothing to comfort them as I find no comfort for myself.

My night drones on with pain being my companion. Sleep eludes me, playing on my delicate fragility. Every night spent with Talon taunts me like a beautiful dream.

His eyes stare beyond my soul, reaching into me to touch parts of me I could swear never existed.

My poem recites in my memory. In his hands I was stronger, who I was meant to be. I was weaker, he owned every part of me. In his hands, he held forever; our souls will always be one. In his hands, I had meaning. Our lives had just begun. In his hands, my heart will always lie, never again to be peaceful. Trusted to his love, for never long enough, My Talon was sent from the Goddess. Taken by the hands that created him, because all he knew was love.

With sadness in my heart, pain in my soul, I whisper my hatred to my creator. Words so vile, I would surely cease to exist, leave my angry lips. Traitorous hands ripped my love from my arms. I barely got a goodbye.

As Edward whimpers in my arms, Kai pushes forward to take over where I am clearly unable to perform. I watch as my wolf plays the second parent to the three lives that we had created. With no energy to pull my parental duties, I allow Kai to carry my weight.

If I live a thousand years, I will never love again. I do not wish for a second mate, for no one would ever live up to the only one I ever knew. My Talon, my mate, my everything will always be the only love I ever share. His love was pure, gentle and everything I always prayed for. I don't know how I will do this. If I'm being honest, I don't even want to find out.

Yawning, sleep decides to have mercy on me. My eyes seep slowly to a final close. My breaths hiccup, expelling anger, grief and pain. My heart breaks a bit more as I think of all the days I will never know love again.