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***Spencer's POV***

"He killed him. In front of us, in front of the pack. He decapitated his own flesh and blood." Alpha Jamison says the words.

I feel it. The loss. The pain. The finality. I feel the break. My heart pumps wildly as tears roll down my face. My voice coming out in broken sobs.

You think I'm crying for Malik, I'm not. I'm crying for me.

I'm free.

"Shhhh. Baby. It's okay. It's okay." My mate's arms wrap around me and I cling to him. I hold him so close. I can feel his heart beating in my chest.

"I'm okay. I'm free." I sniffle as I look at Lyle Pearson. My love. My life. My mate.

"Yes, you are love. You're free." Lyle walks me through the crowd of wolves as they part for us. Lyle sets me down in his lap and cradles me gently.

"Alpha Ramon, he wants to visit. When your ready. But, we told him that was your choice. You don't have to ever be ready." My father n law bends down in front of me and I climb into his lap.

"I don't hate him. He didn't know." I whisper the words into Eric's large chest. His arms are comforting, soothing.

"Spencer. We love you. So much. We aren't angry with you. We haven't been. Honestly, just thought it was some fucked up hormones." Eric chuckles and I giggle. So did I.

"Can I um, hold one of the babies? I don't know what's going on. But, Keagan is really pushing for a pup to be in our arms?" I ask the words softly. I'm scared. I haven't so much as looked at one of the pups in all these weeks.

I look up as Lloyd hands me his super tiny pup. This boy doesn't look like he's the product of his hulking Daddies. I smile as I cradle the sleeping pup in my arms. Keagan mewls and coos as we feel the weight of such a tiny thing in our arms.

"What have I been missing?" I hold the baby close to my face and nuzzle into his soft flesh. I'm in love. Oh Goddess, it's incredible.

I hold back the tears as they gather quickly.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." I rock the pup back and forth. I place a kiss on his cheek, humming at the love radiating off the tiny bundle of joy.

I can feel my pup stirring. His body moves, for the first time, inside of me. I glance down at my small belly in sheer pleasure.

"He's moving." I whisper. My heart fills and blooms to a staggering size. My pup.

"He's probably waking up. His name is William." I smile but shake my head.

"No. My pup. He just moved." I push the baby into Eric's arms and grab my stomach. I press my splayed hand against my tummy and rub, wanting desperately to feel it again. Nothing.

"Give him back." I bark the order and accept William back into my arms. My pup immediately flutters in my stomach.

"Babe. Feel." I look up to Lyle with anticipation. I pray he can feel it.

Lyle's hand reaches my lower back and he places his other over my belly button. The baby goes to fucking town.

"He must be a ninja." I cry out the words in elation.

Lyle beams while he holds me between his hands.

"He's active." Lyle bends down and lifts my shirt. I blush. I'm not used to that. He kisses my stomach and I run my fingers through his hair while latching desperately to my Mate and William.

"We love you little one. So much." Lyle kisses me so much it tickles. I giggle. It feels so good to genuinely laugh.

"Let's see something." Talon takes William he replaces him with one of the twins. Gracie I think. She's so little and adorable. It hurts to look at her.

Our pup flutters. But, not so vividly.

"He slowed down." Lyle announces. We switch back for William and he goes crazy. Our pup continuously moves.

"He likes William." I smile so wide. My baby.

"Here try the rest." Jenny swaps each baby. All the names being told to me as I hold each pup. I want them all, every single one of them.

"Amazing." Lutz whispers as he strokes his son's cheek.

"They all are." I look over at all the pups. I want mine. Now.

"Patience love." Lyle leans over and cups my face. He presses his lips against mine. I feel electricity buzzing. It's not super prominent, but it's so much more than we have shared ever.

"That feels good." I pull his face towards mine as he tries to move away. I climb in his lap and suck on his lips, pushing my tongue into his mouth past his teeth. My head buzzes. I feel faint but, I don't mind. Lyle wraps his arms around me and holds me tightly while I kiss him with everything I can muster. It's not sparks or fireworks, but the sizzle is there.

I pull away slowly, gulping for breath. I lean my head down on his shoulder and wrap my body around him. I love his muscles. I love him.

"Wanna go upstairs?" Lyle whispers in my ear and I nod my head softly.

Lyle stands up and walks away from the crowd with me wrapped completely around his waist.

"You can say no. But, I really want to be with you." Lyle says the words so low, I barely catch the tremble in his voice.

"I won't say no." I put my lips to his mark and begin placing small kisses on his skin.

My back softly melts into the fabric of our bedding. Lyle looks at me so sadly. I put that pain there. It's my job to make it disappear. I twist my hand in his shirt and bring his face to mine until our noses are touching.

"Babe. I love you. I'm so sorry for the things I have said. The way I have treated you. Let me help you heal." I pull his lips to mine and softly take whatever he is willing to give. My heart pounds at the thought of ever losing him. I cry into the kiss.

Lyle's tongue makes its way into my mouth. His hands knot in my hair. His large palms cradle my face gently. He moans for me and I feel tingles shoot all the way down to my toes. I curl my feet up against his back and relish in the small acknowledgment.

"Don't stop. Don't stop." I practically beg. Need pours through me.

"I'm not." Lyle pulls me back and kisses my nose.

"I mean don't give up on me. Please." I try not to cry. All I fucking do is cry anymore.

"I'm not doing that either baby. Spencer you're mine. Only mine." His hands discard our clothing with a soft tug and small pull. I let my legs fall and my arms lay to my sides. I lay bare for my broken mate. I broke him.

"You didn't." Lyle places a kiss on my lips before trailing my whole body in tender reminders.

"I can't blame everything on the poison." I shake my head and cover my face. It's probably like alcohol. You're true feelings come out under the influence. Except, I have never hated my mate. Ever. I have loved him for so long. From afar.

"We are going to have some rules." Lyle pins my arms above my head and sits up. He uses his free hand to trace my body.

"I will do anything." The promise is clear. I will do whatever it takes.

"We start over. From right this second." His hand rubs my side and I shiver.

"What else?" I try to hold back the small purr from his touch.

"If you're angry, we talk." He bends down and kisses my lips. I nod in agreement.

"When you're horny, we touch." I smile as he strokes my member.

"When you're sad, you come to me so I can make you feel better." He places his hand over my heart.

"When you feel broken, you let me be your strength. Don't hide things. Don't lie. Don't run." He bends down and licks at my mark. This time, my heart takes flight. My body trembles. Heat envelopes me.

"And if someone ever hurts you, threatens you or makes you feel less than, you bring it to me. I'm going to show them why they don't touch what's MINE!" His lips fall down over mine and he takes me. His hot breath fans across my mouth. His tongue sweeps softly, pushing into my wanting cavern. I feel like I'm set on fire, every nerve ablaze.

I moan loudly, panting. I grab at his hair and throw my legs wildly around his body. My cock rubs frantically against his as I angle my back so I can feel our skin touch.

"Take me." I scream the need. It's unbelievably overwhelming. My whole body aches to be one with my mate.

"As you wish." His cock presses into me. The stretch is beautiful. I feel every inch as he sinks inside of me with purchase. I grind down as he tunnels his way through me.

"Fuck, baby." He moans out a growl that has me swimming in desire.

"More. More." I whimper under his body. Nothing has ever felt so dire. I have to have every inch of him.

"Shhhh. I got this." He rocks his hips until he bottoms out inside of me. I can't do much but tear up at the unbelievable sensations that rack my form. He's everywhere. He's delicious. He's mine.

Mine.

"Satan. Fuck." Lyle pants. He yanks our hands forward and smashes our lips together. He greedily steals our breath. There it is. Fireworks. Bursting stars. Explosions of love radiates all through me, inside of me and around me. I tremor at the overpowering feeling.

Lyle presses his hands into our ass and spreads our cheeks. He pushes and pulls while our body accepts his girth. Fuck. Why has it never felt so good?

I push Keagan back. This is for us. Me and Lyle. Keagan falls back and agrees.

"Breed me." I hop off Lyle's dick and get on all fours. I stroke my cock gently, waiting.

"Holy Mother of Moons." His cock slides in and he wraps his arms around my chest. He holds me to him while I relish in his muscles on my back.

"Hard. So fucking hard. Claim me." I bounce back with little tilts. He's heavy and I have no hope of controlling our thrusts from our position.

His hips pull back and I almost whine from the loss. He snaps forward and pounds into my prostate. I scream an unholy sound. A long moan trailing off in ecstasy.

"That ass. Mine." His hips piston with his words.

"That heart. Mine." He picks up speed.

"Those lips. Those hands. That sassy fucking mouth. All. Mine." Blinding force pushes his hips into me. My cock threatens to explode.

"I am going to cum." I lose my breath.

"Cum for me mate. Cum for me." He throttles me. I arch my back into his stomach and mewl as my seed spills below us.

"You're so god damned sexy. My sexy, beautiful mate." Lyle wraps his hands around my neck and turns me into his kiss. He brings us both up to our knees and fucks me possessively.

I turn my head and slide my lips to his mark. The yearning to sink my teeth into his flesh is other worldly. He wraps his free hand around my cock and starts rumbling in his chest.

I sink my canines down and feel his lips descend. His canines pierce my mark and we explode. I see stars. Flashes of white. I feel my world spinning. I fall to the bed in a heavy pant after removing my incisors and licking his neck.

"Holy hell." My chest heaves as my body falls forward.

"Fuck. Fuck. Oh shit. I want to do that again." Lyle crawls over my back and cages me under his massive chest.

"I love you." He kisses me so many times. I accept it all.

"I love you. Thank you." I roll over and pull him down on top of me. He shimmies to the side so his weight is on his elbow. He tangles our legs together and rubs his thumb over my jawline.

"You're absolutely my world Spencer." His words warm my soul.

"You are my everything." I pull him down and mend our lips softly.

"You hungry love?" His face is so close. I'm hungry for more than food. I nod and he picks me up. He takes us to the bathroom and sets me down on the counter. He cleans us up and pecks my lips before he puts me back in his arms.

Lyle walks us down the stairs and joins the dinner table like we didn't just make love. But, it's there. The bond. The tether. The hold. It's right there. It sparks and tightens with every look, each touch and every sweet word.

I have waited my whole life to be loved. And now I am.

Lutz hands me William when I reach my hands to the pup. I can't get enough of this kid. I just want to hold him.

My pup goes crazy causing me to giggle in my mate's lap.

"Baby kicking?" Lyle kisses my cheek while I nod.

Lyle puts a fork to my mouth and I eat eagerly.

"You two are fucking adorable." Ally sighs while she looks at us. I smile back.

That's what I want. I want what all my friends have. Now I have it.

"I can see it. The bond." Luna Cass smiles and winks at me. I nod.

"It's gonna be a long road. But, we will walk it together." Lyle squeezes me and I lean into him, careful not to shift William.

"You can't keep him." Talon giggles at my possessive hold on the baby.

"I will think of giving him back." I kiss William softly. He's fucking precious.

"Tell us that at two am." Lloyd shivers at the thought.

I giggle and cuddle my favorite pup. I'm partial. Sue me.

"The girls will be jealous." Remi laughs as I shrug.

"Baby, swap pups." Lyle nudges my arm as I reluctantly take Talia in my arms.

"Why?" I whine. William makes my pup happy.

"Because, I wanted to hold him." Lyle laughs manically while laying kisses over my favorite baby.

I glare playfully at my devious mate.

"Asshole." I nuzzle my nose into Talia's neck. Wow. She smells like marshmallows and vanilla.

"You're pup smells like a Rice Krispie treat." I giggle out.

"We know." Jace laughs out at my assessment.

"Give me Hannah." I swap with Talon and sniff the big girl.

"Well?" Remi laughs knowingly.

"Smores." I giggle while I kiss her cheek. "Chocolate and Cinnamon."

Talon nods in agreement.

They hand me baby Gracie. So tiny, but what a little spit fire. She lands her tiny fist right on my cheek. I giggle and kiss her hand.

"Sunshine. Rain. I could scent her all day." I rub my nose all over her neck and play with her soft wisps of hair.

"I think we found his second favorite." Lyle rubs his thumb over her cheek.

Gracie gets red in the face. Her little body squirms and she starts whining in irritation.

"You don't want to scent her right now." Remi jumps up and grabs his pup.

I gasp at the foul odor.

"Oh Hell. Why?" I gag. Oh fuck. That isn't normal. My stomach lurches and I have to jump away from the table. I move quickly to the other side of the room.

"Like clock work. One hour after she eats." Talon giggles a he rushes up the stairs with Remi.

"I don't want one." I shake my head dramatically. I hold my hand over my nose. The stench just hangs on the inside of my nostrils.

Lyle laughs hysterically while I shake my head repetitively.

"It's normal." Lloyd laughs at my utter disgust.

"There is nothing normal about that." I cannot believe that precious child smelled like a rotting corpse.

"Want William?" Lyle walks over and hands me the little sweet pea.

I sniff his skin and sigh.

"You love me pumpkin." I kiss his fingers and rock him gently.

"Smells like pumpkin latte." Lutz smiles.

"Yeah. Like coffee. No wonder I love him." I continue to fawn over the Angel.

"Come back so I can finish feeding you love." Lyle gently grasps my hip and leads me back to his lap at the table.

"You're spoiling me." I smile as I accept the meatloaf. It's fucking good.

"I will spoil you forever if it makes you happy." Lyle kisses my cheek.

"You have forever." I nod. I will gladly keep this man.

"Finish eating so we can have a bonfire." Talon comes back down with a fresh baby.

Thank God.

"I hope you buried that." I whine. God she smelled awful.

"Diaper Genie. Dad's best friend." Remi smiles and burps Hannah.

"Febreeze that shit, literally." I am still stunned.

"Wait another hour. You won't be fond of William." Lutz looks at me with a grimace.

"In forty five, he's all yours." I hop off my mate's lap and start heading outside. I sit on the porch swing and rock the moving pup gently.

"Why are you up here?" Jenny sits down next to me.

"Don't want the smoke from the fire on the pup." I smile at her.

"You're going to be a great Daddy." Jenny wraps her arms around me.

"I hope so. I just don't want to fail." I shrug. I guess we all feel that way.

"Did you know Omegas were the original carriers? You were literally born to birth pups." Jenny softly instills things that I have never learned.

"I didn't." I shake my head.

"You were born to love, nurture and raise pups. That's your gift. You're not supposed to be strong physically. It doesn't take muscles to raise a family. It takes heart. You, Spencer, you're full of heart. You're going to do amazing." I curl into her. I don't remember much of my mom. I wish I did. But, Jenny is a good stand in. Probably the best.

"She's right." I look up and move over. Eric sits his hulking frame on my other side.

"You may lack in physicality. But, you have strength. You are caring. You are loving. You are worthy. Don't you forget that boy. Don't you ever let what happened strip you bare. Look at our Luna. He was once in your shoes. Not the same shoes. But, he had his battles. You could learn a lot from Talon Williams. He has heart. He forgives. He loves. He is a piss ant. But, that just makes him even better. Don't lose yourself Spence. There is room for you just the way you are. You're perfect." Eric knows how to grip me in the heart. I have learned that much from my Father n Law. He is wonderful.

I yawn and gladly give William over to Maria.

"Enjoy your night honey." Maria kisses me softly as she takes her grandson back into the house. I miss him already.

"Would you care to dance?" I look up at Lyle's proffered hand. I willingly take it and follow him to the fire. The music blares loudly. A slow melody leaks into the air.

I press my body against my mate and wrap my arms around his neck. I let him lead me as we sway softly.

"I would never ask for another. You are perfect." Lyle whispers sweet words into my ear.

"Me either. I have been blessed immensely." I look up and kiss my loving mate. It's amazing what can happen when you aren't being torn apart by outside forces.

I feel pain for what happened. Not just to me. One day, a wolf is going to realize they no longer have a mate. That hurts. I didn't make that choice. I shouldn't feel pain for that decision. I do all the same. I pray that Moon Goddess has a second chance for that lost wolf. If that's my only prayer, I pray that the wolf finds someone like my mate to ease their pain.