"Oh I'm so glad you're here," I say, hugging my mom tightly while Dean and my dad talk. They weren't one bit surprised to hear that we are together. It was a relief to know that my parents still like him after the way dinner went.

"We wouldn't miss it for the world. Ruth wishes she could have come but Xavier's parents are moving and needed their help," Mom says, pulling back to study me.

She must be content with whatever she sees because she smiles happily at me.

"There's always next year," I hear myself say, and I don't miss the flash of hurt over my mom's face. It's gone in a split second but the guilt sticks to me.

"Where is your dog? I've missed the fluff ball." Dad asks, looking around the apartment, and I'm so glad I hid all the boxes of packed things in my closet. They're getting hard to explain to Cassidy and Dean. The whole 'I still haven't unpacked from when I moved here four months ago' isn't really flying anymore.

Dean smiles and looks at his phone for a second, "Boo is at my place right now. I thought it'd be easier since I live closer to the shelter and he has a prospective adopter we're meeting with tomorrow. We can stop there on our way to dinner to say hi, but I'm afraid we can't stay for long if we want to make the reservation."

Boo is a great dog and the girl I've been talking to seems like a really great person. She grew up with German Shepherds and has been looking for one that's the perfect fit. I hope it's the perfect fit. He deserves his forever home.

"And you guys share ownership of the dog?" My mom asks curiously.

"Until he's adopted." I say and Dean nods, confirming what I said.

Dean's wearing a sweater that I'm sure is cashmere and a million times softer than the sweater I'm wearing. I curled my hair for once and I'm quite happy with how it turned out. Normally Ruth would always do my hair, but I've been learning in that aspect.

"Are we ready to head out?" He asks, smiling kindly at me.

"I'm ready when you are. Mom, Dad are you good or was there something you wanted to grab while you're here?"

"We're ready too. I think we're just going to follow in our car to give you guys some privacy." She says, winking and I feel my cheeks flush causing Dean to laugh. I like his laugh. It fits him perfectly which isn't something I would usually say about a laugh. I'm falling hard for him. Maybe I've already been falling but I hadn't entertained the idea of us being anything more than friends because this wasn't supposed to happy.

It's thrilling and electrifying being with him.

Dean makes me happy.

I like to think I make him happy too. I know he was happy this morning

In the car ride to Dean's place, I feel the discomfort in my chest grow. It's been there since our walk in Central Park, and I've been trying to do my best to ignore it. This is after all the last birthday I get and I want to enjoy it. We started out the day with Dean making me breakfast in bed after I woke him up for birthday sex, then we took Boo for a walk in Central Park. We stopped to visit the Empire State Building and like the cheeseball he is, Dean gave me my birthday present which was half of a yin-yang necklace.

To make it even cheesier, he has the other half and his reasoning was that it's because I balance him out. I don't really balance him out, I just help Dean simplify things when he's overthinking. Which is constant.

It was the perfect day.

I couldn't have asked for a better birthday. I only wish that I'd been able to have a conversation with Ruth in person rather than over the phone.

"You okay?" Dean asks, glancing over at me with a look of concern.

"I'm fine; just thinking about how great today has been."

God his smile. I swear if it was the last thing I saw, I'd die a happy woman. It fits his face so well and I love it even more when it's directed at me.

"Well it's not over yet," He reminds me, pulling into the parking lot for his building.

"Do you think that girl will adopt him tomorrow?" I ask, referring to Boo as I get out of the car.

He shrugs, smiling sympathetically, "Probably. He's a great dog."

"Yeah, he is."

"Cheer up, we're not going to be sad today. Sadness is for tomorrow."

I laugh as he places his arm over my shoulders, pulling me close enough to him that he can place a kiss on the side of my head while we wait for my parents to finish parking. "Who says we have to be sad tomorrow? We should be happy for Boo. The lady seems really nice."

My parents walk over to where we're standing and we head inside. There's no elevators but Dean lives only lives on the second floor so it could be worse. I press a hand to my chest trying to see if there's anything I can do to relieve the pressure. I think I brought my meds with me so I can take them when we get upstairs. Actually now that I think about it, I left them in my purse which is in Dean's car.

I've been lazy with them the past few days-actually the past few weeks since I got my diagnosis. The diagnosis should have made me become more consistent with them, but it's hard remembering to take all of them when I know the end result is going to be the same.

I'm not getting better. I'm getting worse. I think I'm going to run out of bronzer soon because I keep adding it to my makeup routine trying to hide how pale and sickly I look sometimes.

But, today is not the day to think about this. I should be really excited for tonight. Dean promised that we weren't going anywhere super fancy because I want to be able to laugh and not feel like I'm doing something wrong. It was a great surprise last time, but I'd rather go someplace else.

I try to steady my breathing by breathing in through my nose and out through my mouth so it's not quite so obvious that I'm winded by a simple set of stairs. It wasn't this bad earlier when we went for a walk.

We walk into the apartment and when he flips the light on, everyone from the fire station, my friends from work, and Xavier and Ruth are standing there. My jaw hits the floor and I stare in shock at everyone.

I look at Dean with tears in my eyes, "Did you do this?"

He shrugs and looks back at my parents, "I had help. Happy birthday Lacey."

Then I'm being tackled by Ruth just like I imagined would happen if she were here today. And she is here. This is the best surprise.

I don't get to hug Ruth for too long before I'm making the rounds to say hi to everyone and thank them for coming. To my surprise, even Chase came. He looks slightly out of place as if he's unsure I'd want him here. "Hi," I say hesitantly and he smiles faintly at me.

"Happy birthday," He starts with and I can't help but give him a hug. Chase is a great guy, but he's not the guy. I hope he understands that.

"Thank you for coming."

He scratches the back of his neck, "Of course. I wasn't sure if you wanted me here but everyone else was coming..."

"I'm sorry. I know I told you that Dean and I were friends and I honest to god thought we were. I never meant to hurt you." I blurt out and Chase smiles at me.

"You said you would try and you did. If he makes you happy then I'm glad you're with him. I'd like to try and be friends still if that's okay?"

Oh god this is such a relief. I mean I know that Dean said the conversation with Chase went well, but I was still worried. "I would really like that."

I glance over to where Dean and Xavier are hitting it off really well. I spot Grayson and Tessa chatting with my parents and it's so weird seeing my life in Bristol collide full force with my New York City life. However, I don't see where Ruth disappeared to.

"I'm really sorry, but I need to go find my best friend if that's okay?"

He waves me on, "No worries, I have to talk to Linc about something so it's okay, really."

I walk away to find Ruth, but I'm also planning on finally making a stop in the bathroom to get a glass of water. I don't think anything's wrong, it just hurts.

I'm not quite sure where she disappeared to, but I find Boo instead. He's getting all kinds of love from Will's secretary who I've become fast friends with.

Boo follows me to the bathroom and I feel a tickle in my throat before I can go in which leads to me coughing harshly into my sleeve. I've had this cough for a few weeks but it doesn't happen often. However when I look at the white fabric, it's tinged with pink splotches.

I just want a glass of water, I think as the pain my chest spasms. I make eye contact with Dean as I grab my chest and cry out, doubling over. Oh my god this hurts. This hurts so much. It's like someone's sitting on my chest.

Is this what it feels like to die? I need it to stop. I need it all to stop hurting.

"Lacey!" I hear someone cry out and I try to grab the wall, but it hurts so much.

I'm not quite sure who grabs me to help hold me up, but I hear my mom asking where my pills are. I'm supposed to carry them at all times and I left my bag in Dean's car. I don't usually carry them, but I did tonight.

I try to take a breath but it causes shooting pain to run down my left arm. "Pills are in purse. In Dean's car," I gasp out. "Please, make it stop."

Please just let this be over soon, I think to myself. I don't know how much more I can take.